It was the best of times, it was the worst of times

December 31st, 2008

To answer my own question, I’ve definitely had some hits and misses sex toy-wise this year. The Passion Wave and 24 Karat Gold Double Happiness were both hits in the sex toy department. I enjoyed the naughty tales in Five Minute Erotica as well as licking Raspberry Honey Dust off my partner. Shaving has become infinitely easier since I invested in some Coochy Cream as well.

However, there were some bumps along the way. Durex’s Play Vibrating Cock ring was disappointing to say the least and I expected a bit more from the Luna Beads (although it wasn’t a complete loss). I tried my first hands free vibrator, the Venus Butterfly, to less than exciting results. Although I had heard good things about Wet Light lubricant, it just wasn’t up to par. Lastly, the Mini G Rock was an interesting but poorly designed toy that did nothing for my sexual satisfaction.

I’ve had a good year so far and, considering as I just got into this reviewing thing, I only see next year topping it! I’d like to thank all the wonderful shops who supplied me with the toys (both good and bad) in return for my reviews including Babeland, GoodVibes, Vibrator.com, Tabutoys and EdenFantasys.

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Five Minute Erotica

December 30th, 2008

I’m sure I’m not alone when I say that I sometimes feel as though I spend more time looking for masturbation material than I do actually using it. Although images and movies and literature are available by the truckloads online, it’s not always easy to find quality material (and, let’s face it, I’m cheap) which is free. While Five Minute Erotica isn’t necessarily free, it’s reasonably priced and will be your own volume to peruse on many occasions, which I believe you will.

Five Minute Erotica is full of – as you might have guessed – short stories and prose also known as sudden fiction. Most of nearly 40 the stories range between 1 and 5 pages so it’s perfect if you’re already revved up and just need something to get your engine going. Of course, if you want to read a handful of stories, this anthology will work well and when I began the book, I wasn’t in the mood but a couple of stories helped to change it. However, this is probably not the type of erotica best for those who like lots of character development. While filled with characters and surprisingly powerful events and relationships, the point of this is not to be prolonging. If you know you want something quick and easy, this is it.

Also, while everything is sexual in nature, it’s not always about sexual things happening. Some of the stories simply show us glimpses into the sexual thoughts of characters, such as what they like or abstract memories. Sex isn’t always happening, but it’s there.

I liked that the authors, themes, styles and formats of the stories were varied. Some dealt with sex with strangers or lovers and even voyeurism. One story was in the form of an e-mail between lovers while another used only commas for punctuation. Written in third and first person, by males and females there really is a little bit of everything here. I would guess that most people would be satisfied (if they’re interested in this sort of thing) although I can’t guarantee you’ll like everything. I quickly skipped over a story which had toe sucking in it (sorry that’s an “Eww” thing to me) and, of course, there are some I simply forgot. Overall, however I enjoyed this book and it’s certainly of a higher caliber than what is readily available online.

Among my favourites were a story with alien, tentacle sex (perhaps rape would be a better word?) where a young woman who is driving becomes lost and abducted by aliens only to experience pleasure giving mouths at the ends of tentacles. In A Closer Encounter, Blake C Aaren writes:

An infinite number of tentacles rove all over Tasha’s body. Stroking, caressing, inching. Nibbling. A tentacle of her own -of her wetness- trails down the inside of Tasha’s thigh.

I also really enjoyed a story where a woman is dressed as a cat, for a party, and engages in intercourse with her partner. During the session, she acts and verbalizes as only a cat. I was intrigued by the roleplaying in this story – Bad Kitty - told by Thomas Roche.

I wonder if it is coincidence that the stories which were most memorable for me are written by men or, for that matter, that they are more unusual. I must say, though, that most of the stories are of a more vanilla style which is fine by me, but might be a little tame for some. Aside from some very light bondage, Five Minute Erotica does not cater to those with taboo or kinky fetishes. Still, it’s a good, light read.

The downfall of such a collection is that, if you find something you like, it isn’t going to last forever. Also, if you want something in particular you might not find (enough of) it because this book does cram in such a variety.

Now, I haven’t read a lot (read: any) published erotica so I can’t say how this holds up overall but I think it was a good book to start. It’s a little plainly bound; although the cover picture hints at erogenous zones and the flesh-filled anecdotes within. I didn’t find myself focusing in language errors like I’ve done with amateur erotica in the past, which pleased me immensely. I did notice that the margins are rather small and I wasn’t overly fond of the font used for headings and the table of contents.

Overall, I think Carol Queen did a good job as editor, picking high quality stories by writers of all sorts of notoriety. She also contributed a piece herself – The Bounty of Summer – after which I will never look at fruit the same again. While I didn’t enjoy the first story being the one which uses only commas for punctuation (I found this a confusing opening piece), I found it easy to go from one story right into the next. In reality, I found I needed a few stories to get me to the point where I dropped the book and picked up a vibrator to finish the job but there are plenty of stories from which to choose.

Although I read this from beginning to end, you can easy pick up just about anywhere in the book which is one of the pluses of such a gathering of stories. This would make is a great book for partners to read aloud to eachother (although I did not because it’s not our thing). Another plus is the author blurbs at the end of the book which often include short lists or other notable work. If you really like an author, it can help to point you to their other published pieces.

If you’re looking for something to get you in the mood for some playtime, whether alone or with a partner, consider Five Minute Erotica. The dozens of wonderfully, self-contained narratives in this collection are sure to start the libidinous wheels a-turning.

Please vote for my review on EdenFantasys.

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Stockroom

It’s that time of year..

December 30th, 2008

You know, the end of the year. So, why not some time for reminiscing?

What were your best and least toys (and toy experiences) this year?

Care to tell us about your best and worst sexual experiences?

Any other best and worsts that really stuck with it?

1 Comment


What Is Normal?

December 27th, 2008

Spend anytime around adult communities, scratch that, any community on the internet and you will infallibly run across someone who wants to know if his or her behaviour or bodily characteristics are “normal.” Guys want to know if the angle of their penis is right, if the consistency of cum is average. Girls want to know if there’s something wrong with not being as sensitive or not being able to come from penis in vagina intercourse alone. What’s more, the same questions tend to be asked over and over.

Why? People want validation. As though, somehow, being told “It’s okay” by a stranger on the internet will alleviate all your worries. Unfortunately, that’s just not true and I have even worse news. Those who are quick to affirm that there is something wrong with you, are quick to tell you that their product is the miracle “cure.” Coincidence? I think not.

The truth of the matter is simple. There is no “normal.” There might be average. There might be things people will admit to being, doing or liking. There might be things people say apply to them in order to not stick out. There’s also a wide variety of things people won’t admit to, even anonymously. There’s also many things people do or like and they don’t quite know the word for them or don’t think to apply words to the activities. Even if normal were some tangible goal, we would never know what it is because there’s no way to quantify it.

What it comes down to is this: Stop asking if things are normal. It may seem that I am against asking questions or community support. The truth is far from it. I just support asking the right questions. I also recognize that there’s no use worrying about some things. We’re not all the same and sometimes it’s the quirks that set us apart.

So for those people who are quick to wonder if they’re normal, I must ask my own question? Does it matter? If you can answer “yes” to all the questions below, probably not. If not, there’s a little advice to be had.

Are you satisfied?
Even if your penis curves to the right or you like to be spanked in bed, it may not interfere with your overall sexual satisfaction. In fact, the opposite may be true. While I advocate exploration (in fact, exploration is one of those worrisome topics), if you’re happy, being “normal” doesn’t matter.
Is your partner happy?
Of course, it’s a little more difficult to be sure of this but, like any aspect of a relationship, fulfillment stems from communication. Ensure that you’re attentive and willing (eager is better!) to his or her (or their) needs and whether or not your cup size is average pales in comparison.
Are you being safe?
The pleasure of sex comes with its risks and STDs and pregnancy are both the least of the worries. When it comes to interests which can be harsh on your emotional or physical state, like BDSM, safety is a must. But if you’re careful about your sexual activities, you needn’t worry about how many people are doing them.
Is it healthy?
This is a question which I feel is extremely important to ask. While somethings do not have serious ramifications, health is a subject which should not be glossed over. If you have been dealing with issues such as painful intercourse or even inability to maintain an erection for a prolonged period of time, it may be best to consult your doctor.
Are you okay with it?
Sometimes, we just want to be like everyone else even if there’s no solid reason. This is why many grown men choose to be circumcised and some people op for plastic surgery. Even if you’re sexually satisfied, healthy and safe, your peculiarities might be worrisome. If you don’t feel comfortable in your own skin then, by all means, do whatever it takes to change that. Whether that means changing (what you can) or changing your attitudes about what you can’t, we all have the right to feel comfortable.

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Extreme Restraints

Pleasurists #9

December 26th, 2008

Better late than never, right?

Pleasurists is your round-up of the adult product reviews that came out in the last seven days from bloggers all around the sex blogosphere. Did you miss Pleasurists #8? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #10? Submit it here before Sunday December 14th at 11:59pm PST. Please re-post this list on your own blog if listed.

Want to win some free swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.

On to the reviews…

Editor’s Pick

Verdict: A gorgeous present to go in any bad girl’s stocking – or a good girl’s stocking, if you want to corrupt her in a most pleasant fashion.

Note: I couldn’t pass up picking this particularly festive toy! There are some gorgeous pictures with this review as well (as usual for Dee).
Madame Editrix
Scarlet Lotus Sexgeek

Vibrators

Dildos

Anal Toys

Toys for Boys

Sex Kits

Lube/Massage Oil

BDSM/Fetish

Erotic Books/Games

Adult Movies/Porn

Miscellaneous

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Excuse the Mess

December 26th, 2008

I am in the process of converting my comments to the threaded comments format which WordPress now allows.  I have to tweak the appearance of it so things might seem a little hinky. However, everything should work fine, even if it looks strange.

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Toys Toys Toys

Strange..

December 25th, 2008

I awoke, horny and wet. I had been dreaming about trying to fuck a man with a huge cock, bigger than is realistic. It wouldn’t work without lube, no matter how wet I was from looking at his cock. This man was not my type – he was bald and somewhat stocky. Yet, as he derobed from his layered, pinstripe suit (he was a moster, afterall), he revealed himself to be a thin man and, suddenly, appeared much more attractive.

Although, earlier in the dream he seemed to have control in a scary way (I had been taking a walk in the wrong place and he threatened to kill me but I used my powers of seduction to get away), it wouldn’t be that way now. I quickly had him restrained, using my under the bed restraints but he broke out. Yet, it wasn’t a bad thing. It was playful and arousing.

Like so many of my sex dreams, we never had sex. His cock rubbed against my vulva and I loved it but there was no penetration.  We met at least 3 times where we rubbed and sucked and kissed but there was no actual sex.

I awoke sexually frustrated and immediately went to the desk, where I had kept my brand new Layaspot. Within minutes, I was getting off.

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Luna Pleasure Bead System

December 21st, 2008

When I requested the Luna Pleasure Bead System to review from Babeland, I expected a high quality set vaginal exercise balls to facilitate kegels and possibly add pleasure.

In reality, I got a quality set of vaginal balls which may well help strengthen my PC muscles but this exerciser doesn’t seem to soar above comparable tools.

What I think is that the value of having 2 pairs of weighted balls is somewhat exaggerated and, while it sounds novel there isn’t much to back up the claims. I would have been a little more satisfied with 1 set of balls because this is a solid product. I wanted to badly to love my first Lelo product but, unfortunately, I only like it.

What worked for me are the baby blue and pink pairs of weighted balls which look quite elegant in their stretchy, Phthalate free silicone holder (and stay in place due to notched ridges in the beads themselves) and the subtle movement of the balls within to remind me periodically of the balls within myself. I also enjoyed the sleek, white cardboard box in which the product arrived. This contained a black storage box with tray for both sets of balls which is nondescript enough to keep on your bathroom counter or nightstand without drawing notice to itself and, if someone is curious, the balls themselves do not look like sex toys. Alternatively, the white satin pouch provides even more discreet storage options and would work well if you are traveling with your Luna Beads.

What didn’t work so well for me was the bare retraction string which felt unhygienic without a coating and sometimes cut into my finger during removal. The subtle “vibrations” of the inner balls were not pleasurable in any way. The large size of the Luna Beads made it unnecessary to use my PC muscles to keep them from falling out and also difficult to insert initially (insertion proved easier over time). Removal also was difficult because there was a suction effect between the “crown” bead and my vagina, hence the string cutting into my finger (however the string has proved strong thus far).The instructions and pouch are both stored beneath the balls and I didn’t even realize they were there for nearly a week! While I like the storage box, the plastic cover on top of the balls is quite difficult to remove sometimes.

The biggest problem with the Luna Beads is that the idea of incremental resistance to increase PC muscle control is dubious at best. Starting with the lighter beads and moving to the heavier ones would make sense if one or both of the pairs were of different sizes. Because they are so large, it’s not any harder to keep the heavier balls inside and the heavier balls don’t really offer any more ‘resistance”. There is no way the Luna Beads are going to fall out of anyone during normal activities. In fact, because it’s easier to feel the “vibrations” of the heavier balls, it makes more sense to me to start with them and move on to the harder-to-feel vibrations of the lighter balls once your PC muscles are strong.

Furthermore, although the instructions simply say the vaginal balls will work best during activities like running or swimming, these are not a passive tool, in my opinion. The instructions include no actual suggestions for activities to do when the Luna Beads are inserted and I think this would be valuable material.

While using the Luna Beads, I masturbated, peed, walked, sat, lay and did other activities. I found them to be fairly comfortable but often forgot they were even in which seems a bit counterproductive. They do make an audible sound when you’re moving but once you add layers of clothes or background noises, others will not hear. While peeing, one ball did slip out but I was able to stop them from falling out completely. Orgasming with the Luna Beads inside did not feel all that different than without.

I feel that overall, Luna Beads are a quality product but the effect of having two pairs of weighted balls is little to none. I expected more from the two sets of balls, and do feel a bit disappointed in that respect. If this were simply one set of balls, I think I would be more satisfied. As a single set of vaginal balls, the heavier of the Luna Beads does seem to work well. After using them about 5 times, I do feel I have more control over my muscles and I will continue to use them periodically. However, I am not overly put off because I do not feel I need to use vaginal balls.



15 Comments


The Sasi at Babeland

Hey Sex Bloggers

December 20th, 2008

Just curious – do you find your sex blogs are plagued with more spam or weirder spam than regular blogs? Mine sure seems to be.

3 Comments


Go ahead, treat yourself

December 16th, 2008

As the holidays roll in, so do some awesome deals from the many sex toy retailers online. Since we’ve all been shopping tirelessly for our loved ones (you have, haven;t you?!), it’s time to do something a little special for ourselves.

Babeland is offering free shipping on all orders over $99. Babeland has a lot of great kits to consider buying for yourself or someone who needs a little naughty loving, like the Eco Delight and Sensation Sasi kits. Check out stocking stuffers under $30, too! They even have a great little holiday gift guide and if you’re still confused, you can always buy a gift card for a rainy (or snowy!) day!

Vibrator.com is offering 15% off everytihng when you enter code “Xmas15″ into the checkout. This makes it an opportune time to pick up the Bo cock ring, the Form 6 or the Delight.

Adam and Eve also have some great sales which are good until January including 25% off all cock rings, buy one get one 50% vibrators, and 50% off one item. They’re also still running their holiday sweepstakes where you can win a vacation worth $250,000!

And for anyone who has been intrigued by For Your Nymphomation toy storage – let’s face it, who hasn’t – you still have a few hours to take 25% off an item $40+ by entering code “25OFFDEC16″ at checkout!

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Stockroom