This might be the third year in a row that I’ve posted a best of list. I figured I wouldn’t just do the wonderful toys but provide you with some of the strange and disappointing, too. I’ll have to fudge the lines of “this year” a bit. I must have written last year’s a little early because there were two reviews in December 2012 that didn’t make it on the list. I waited until January for this post because I really wanted to get one last review in, so let’s start there.
I liked the design but expected the Ceramix Pleasure Pottery Dildo No. 4 to be a gimmick with its hollow inside for warm. But warming this dildo up far surpassed my expectations. It’s one of the few dildos that I’ve ever used twice, and I think that says a lot.
I’ve been pimping out the Jimmyjane Form 6 G3 all this year even though it was one of those reviews from late last year. The latest version if powerful, versatile and feels luxurious. It’s the first Jimmyjane vibe that I actually like. Maybe it won’t be the last. My review was on the EF, though, so I’ll probably get around to writing something up on OSAL for you to read.
The Delight by Fun Factory was actually my second. I swapped for one of the originals — the ones that came with a charging case — but never got around to using it. When I moved last year, I misplaced the cable. I wound up trying out the Delight for shape to see if I liked it, and I did like it so much that I purchased the new Click n Charge style. Not only do I love the magenta and black, but it fits my anatomy extremely well.
The Decor Stashe Pillow in Velvish Aubergine won’t get me off but it will hide everything that does and in style.
After using the D.1 stone dildo, I have to say that this blows every metal dildo I’ve ever used out of the water. I am so grateful to have the opportunity to use it and see myself using it frequently in the future.
Another new type of toy was the Stronic Eins Pulsator, which has made its way around many of these lists. It feels good. I just need to wash off all that lint, charge it and use it again (and again and again). This was also my first video review, you guys!
Finally, I cannot tell you how much I love my SHE AfterShave Oil. I could show you the nearly-empty bottle, though. I definitely need to purchase another one.
So, there’s the good.
How about the weird? Strange? Disappointing? Ridiculous?
The Sonic Revel Body. Cool tech, totally not going to get me off. And those attachments? WTF!
- This costume from ILoveSexy just didn’t cut it. I mean, I kinda hate the cut.
- The Revive Energy isn’t terrible but they needed to test the storage pouch, first. Now, mine looks like a sick leopard.
- Ovo looked like a promising brand, but the kegel balls fucking hurt. The t1 didn’t hurt. It just sucked.
- I got 2 Gigi 2s. I am giving both away. Meh.
- I’m not sure that this UFO vibrator works for me.. or anyone.
- The U Touch Down and U Touch Up just need.. to be better.
- These “keyless cuffs” are so not practical.
- This vibrator looks like a cat toy. Pretty sure the cat toy would get me off better.
Why the fuck are companies still making these pieces of shit?
- I’d rather fuck the actual Flash, and he’s my least favorite of the Justice League.
- But, hey, at least it’s better than vibrating vaginal balls.
- Minna Ola is the most overrated, over-hyped, overpriced piece of junk I’ve used.. until the Revel Sonic.
- Remember when that glass dildo broke before I even had a chance to use it?