Nomi Tang Getaway Luxe

August 22nd, 2011

Has it really been soooo long since I first review the Better Than Chocolate? It was novel then, although not perfect. I’ve been wondering how well the new Nomi Tang vibrators would work but refrained from trying them because I had more than enough effective G-spot vibrators. Still, they looked so interesting, with their airplane-esque designs, that I eventually requested one to review.

The Luxe is the black model, the in-between, with an angled, slightly-bulbous head. It’s less intense than the Wild but more interesting than the narrow shaft of the Pure. In fact, the Wild is awfully similar to the Lelo Ella and I don’t think my pubic bone much likes hooky things like that. So Luxe it was.

There are some definitely improvements over Tang’s first effort. For starters, the Luxe is coated in a silky silicone, rather than the TPE composite of the Better Than Chocolate. The silicone feels velvety and smooth to the touch and is definitely softer. Although the inner workings of this vibrator are rigid, you can squeeze at the handle and the bulbous head and feel a bit of give. You might not expect this from the images but I definitely approve.

Another improvement is the use of 2 AA batteries, rather than AAA. Although the Luxe isn’t the most powerful vibrator that I own, its vibrations are moderately rumbly and more than do the trick for me. Now, if you’ve been here before, you’ll know that I respond well to deeper vibrations even if they aren’t super strong. Unfortunately, if strength alone is what you require, the Luxe may not meet your needs.

That is not this toy’s only downfall. I complained in my Better Than Chocolate review but I just don’t understand why these vibrators start in their highest settings! Surely, we’re going to want to turn it up and be sorely disappointed when we realize that this is all we get. No need to reinvent the wheel here. Low to high has worked well for years.

I haven’t noticed any difference in the touch controls. In fact, I used my previous review to remember how to use them. In fact, the user guide is actually wrong as it indicates sliding your finger toward the NT logo turns the vibrations up. The opposite is actually true. It’s a fairly smooth transition between strengths but there’s really not too much difference between the high and the low. In my opinion, the low could be even lower for more of a preparatory sensation and, of course, the highest steady vibration setting could be stronger yet. It’s definitely a middle-of-the-road vibrator. I’d actually like some sort of light setting to indicate the strength of the vibrations on this one because you don’t have the definitive click of a button. The light remains steady on the steady vibrations, however.

It does blink and such when you turn on different modes, after holding the NT logo for two seconds. As far as I can tell, the modes include a slow and fast pulsation–and that’s it. I don’t mind because the pulsation is pretty effective but most vibrators have more settings than I can count or tell apart. If you like escalation or faster pulsation, you might find this one lacking.

But back to the positives. The Getaway Luxe is lockable if you press and hold the end of the slider with no logo. The logo turns red to indicate locking status and if you power it off and back on again, it will be unlocked. You can use it underwater and the battery compartment is pretty secure; however, the strip should be dry to change power and patterns. I’ve also noticed that it’s less responsive if my hands seems a little greasy if I’ve put on lotion or something like that.

My thoughts on the touch controls are a little less positive this time around. It works; it has some nice features but it’s not as convenient as a physical button, which is quicker, offers tactile feedback and will still work even when when or greasy (for the most part). I’m also frustrated with the entire battery set up. You screw off the end of the toy to insert 2AAs into a plastic carriage. It’s a little finicky and I’d rather directly insert the batteries. Aligning the cap back up is a bitch. I can’t never get it just right so it always takes a few moments of fiddling. Once it’s on, it’s on and secure, however.

I must say that I did really enjoy the shape and texture of the Getway Luxe. The bulbous head easily found my G-spot and was also good for clitoral stimulation. The wide handle is so easy to grasp and it’s a little softer than the shaft, too. The placement of the touch script, during use, is a bit awkward but it’s not so much an issue if you leave it on one setting.

Luxe offers 6″ insertable and the majority of the shaft is only around 1″ thick. The bulbous head is slightly wider but it’s not a large toy by any means so it may be good for newbies. Because of the larger handle, the toy has an overall length of 11″ and you may want to pass this by if you want something discreet.

Like the Better Than Chocolate, this comes in a pretty white box. This time, it sits in satin, with a long and narrow guide book and Nomi Tang is now included a drawstring satin bag for storage and transportation. While the Getaway Luxe hasn’t proven to be a dust magnet like some of my other silicone toys, this is definitely a plus.

The MSRV of this toy is $79 but most retailers, including FunWares, are selling it just under $60. That’s a pretty good price for a silicone vibrator of this size and if you really want to try it for yourself or need a nice, basic G-spot vibe, I’d say go ahead and try the Nomi Tang Getaway Luxe.

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Compact Discretion

August 16th, 2011

MyPleasure offers The Compact Discretion is a bullet vibrator that aims to be discreet and, in that, it is actually pretty successful. The vibrator itself, its cords, battery pack and control all sit within a case that looks like a short glasses case. It’s too small to fit glasses but you could maybe describe it as for cigarettes or business cards. Either way, it makes your vibrator super portable in addition to discreet.

But, aside from that, I didn’t like this toy a bit. As soon as I opened the case, a strong plastic/manufacturing smell emanated from it. Unfortunately, this is full of plastic parts that simply didn’t get enough airing out. You might be able to remedy this a bit by letting it sit open. I did but the smell didn’t complete dissipate.

Aside from the smell, another of complaint is the battery compartment. There’s a button you need to press down to slide the rectangular cap outward and up but it’s not very efficient and likes to stick. When the compartment does open, it 2-AA batteries. This leads directly into my next complaint. For a vibrator that uses 2-AA batteries, the Compact Discretion is absolutely weak. The vibrations are incredibly shallow and surface level. If I didn’t know better, I’d expect this bullet was powered by a single AAA! It’s nothing compared to the BNaughty, which I enjoyed quite a bit.

There’s a slider button to control the vibrations. Because they’re so shallow, I really can’t tell much of a difference between the five settings. They’re all steady; no patterns here. There’s tiny red lights to help show which setting you’re on but I don’t find them all that helpful.

Onward with the complaints! The cord between the case and the bullet itself seems quite short. I don’t use a lot of corded toys these days so I find it so awkward. The case is too big to hold during use, really, but if you set it down next to you, the cord makes things awkward. Although it’s attached to the bullet securely, the bullet itself feels cheap.

Because everything’s attached, you need to deal with the awkwardness while trying to wash without wetting the inner workings. You must also completely dry the bullet before returning it to its case.

I don’t have a lot of positives to say about this toy. It’s discreet but at the cost of being fully functional. I would spend the money on a higher quality bullet for sure.

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Divine Inspiration Rotating Massager

June 8th, 2011

So, I’m into new and unusual things and the Divine Inspiration Rotating Massager from California Exotics fits the bill pretty well. It’s a wand style toy that rotates and vibrates and it’s all decked out in pink and black. The specific model I received is straight-handled. The handle is about 1.5 the length of my fist so it’s not like the size of a Hitachi or anything. It’s fairly small. This small toy is powered by two AAA batteries that insert into the end of the handle, after the pink cap screws off. There’s one of those ribbons to aid you in removing batteries–although, I usually find them to get in the way–and a small O-ring around the battery compartment.

Toward the top of the handle, where it begins to narrow, is a silver band for no other reason than to look pretty. I have to admit, I am a fan of the rock and roll chic appeal but I prefer the other toys in the line ever-so-slightly. The head consists of a bright pink TPR that is squishy and velvety. There is a row of oblong bulges that encircle the top of the head. I guess the idea of texture is interesting but perhaps not as functional as Cal Exotics would have you think.

There is a single push button at the base of the rotating massager. One push starts the rotating, a second shifts direction and a third turns it off. Although there is supposed to be vibration in addition to rotation, I could only feel the motor straining inside the handle of the wand. The rotation itself is interesting. It sort of reminds me of the Sasi. It’s an interesting feeling that is somewhat akin to oral but, you know, not exactly. Of course, the problem with this function is that you cannot press the head of the massage against you without forcing the movement to stop. This may also be problematic for you if you’re fleshier. You’ll have to push your labia out of the way. It doesn’t lend itself well to pressure or intense stimulation. while I kind of like the idea, it’s just not enough to get me off.

In use, I really didn’t find the ability to switch direction was effective. Actually, it somewhat hurt to switch direction which makes very little sense. Regardless, a toy like the Sasi is more creative in terms of movement and overall, preferable. Another reason I prefer it is that I can turn off the movement of the ball, when I’m sufficiently aroused, and just use the vibration to get off.

You’ll definitely want to use lube to aid the rotation and keep things comfortable. The texture holds it well, perhaps too well. After I was done, I cringed as I had to scrub the lube out from the tiny crevices in the head of the Divine Inspiration Rotating Massager. I’d really like something a little less time consuming when it comes to washing.

In fact, I’d have to say that, ultimately, this sex toy is more like an electric lube applicator than anything else.

CEN Sexpert


Form 2

June 7th, 2011

Form 2

Form 2
$145 from Babeland

Remember how whiny I was a while back about how I’d never tried a Jimmyjane vibrator? Yea, it wasn’t pleasant. Luckily, I have now had the opportunity. My experience has been a bit.. atypical, I think, so I have some interesting insights to share with you, dear reader.

Now, in case you forgot, the Form 2 is a rabbit shaped vibrator but it’s just the head with two ears that have separate motors. The ears, one would probably guess, are ideal for surrounding the clit or nipples or for passing on either side of the labia or.. an ear? Point is, while most people are going to head south with the Form 2, it does offer some versatility.. which is probably good because I really just don’t like it for clitoral stimulation. I tend to use toys in the general area of my clit, pressed to my pubic bone. It’s about pressure and indirect stimulation for me but it doesn’t get more direct than the Form 2–and it’s on both sides. AAAH! This totally negates the fact that the vibrations are shallow and buzzy, although concentrated.

My personal quirks aside, this just may be better suited to those of you who like direct stimulation from multiple angles. If you’re the type who can lay a vibe against your clit and eventually get off, more or less without any effort, maybe the Form 2 is for you. Unfortunately, I’m not you. My other personal complaint is that the ridiculous buzzyness of this vibrator quickly “numbs” me. Now, I don’t mean numb in the “woe is me, I used a vibrator and I’ll never get off from sex again” type way, so if you’re the anti-woman/masturbation/pleasure/intelligence type who believes that, STFU. No, I mean, that the vibrations are so shallow that my body literally cannot feel them after a while so I turn it up and up and up and eventually I’ve just spent half an hour with a toy that has absolutely not chance of getting me off and what am I doing?

I’m getting to know the toy for review, I guess. At least it’s easy to use. There’s a plus and minus button for controlling the vibration and another button with a squiggly line for moving between the different modes. Jimmyjane has included vibration and pulsation and describes them with an interesting infographic yet, because the buzzyness isn’t a good foundation for effective pulsation.

So I was all set to write this review and say, you know, this is an interesting toy and it seems made well enough.. When it turned itself on, vibrated itself right out of its charging base, fell on my bathroom floor and broke. Scared the crap out of my cats, too.

On the bright side, Jimmyjane was super quick about responding to my issue and sent me out a replacement Form 2 STAT! I just returned the broken one, via prepaid shipping, today. I’m not having any issues with the new one. I’m a little hesitant to keep it in its charging base, should the same thing occur with my replacement, and also because the cats like to nom silicone. Otherwise, I like the charging base. it’s convenient and the design uses a variety of flashing and steady lights to indicate charging and battery status. With the Form 2, you know exactly how much of a charge is left when you lift it from the base. That’s handy.

Because it uses a charging system with contact points–there’s a metal “disc” on the bottom of the toy that contacts the base–it’s waterproof. This makes cleaning super easy and you could take your Form 2 in the shower. That’s not generally my preference as the water tends to make vibrations seemed subdued.

Other points of note include:

  • Form 2 is fairly quiet. Not as quiet as Siri but acceptable enough.
  • The manufacturing seems pretty high quality. The toy feels solid, it’s pretty seamless.
  • The silicone collects dust and smudges like crazy. Arg.
  • A lot of people have complained about some sort of feature/glitch. I haven’t run into it because I don’t spend a lot of time with toys that aren’t going to get me off.
  • Although I’m hoping my specific issues were self-contained, it seemed like Jimmyjane vibrators–especially those in the Form line up–just tend to be glitchy as all get out.

I guess we’ll have to see how I feel about Form 2 in the future.

Jimmyjane Form 2 at Babeland


Mia Black

May 19th, 2011

Lelo has recently revved up the motor in their USB-charging, lipstick-styled vibrator and I figured I’d give it a go. I hadn’t ever given a lot of thought to lipstick vibrators until I recently tried to We-Vibe Tango and, as it turns out, I loved it. I decided it was time to feed my inner geek with another high tech gadget. Generally, I put off writing reviews or even using my new toys for some time but I was pretty excited this time around and gave the Mia a whirl as soon as I could.

Charging was as easy as inserting the device into an open USB port. It sits there and could maybe pass for a flash drive or other USB adapter/dongle. Lelo also includes a few inches of USB extender cable if your set up doesn’t allow for the dongle style charge. This is a pretty handy accessory in and of itself and I’ll probably steal it for use with my other hardware. The light on the Mia blinks during charge and turns solid when charging is complete. It may be that I wasn’t paying attention but the charge didn’t seem to take long at all. The website claims you can get 1.5 hours of vibration out of a 1 hour charge.

When you’re not charging the Mia, you’ll want to replace the cap. Obviously, you can’t have the USB plug out in the open during playtime or for washing. The cap fits snugly but not so much that this toy is waterproof. It’s splash-proof enough for cleaning with soap and water, however. It’s angled in a way that really adds to the lipstick presentation. This adds discretion and aids portability. This is the type of sex toy that you could easily toss in your purse or bag.

Use is extremely easy. Lelo has created just two buttons, the standard + and -. Holding these simultaneously will lock or unlock the device, which is nice for travel and storage as well. The vibrations are buzzy, as I suspected, and located in the rounded tip of the Mia. The We-Vibe Tango definitely has this one beat. If the claims that this model is really twice as strong as the original are true, I feel pity for anyone who had the original. The highest level of steady vibration that the Mia has to offer is probably around the medium setting of the Tango but feels less impressive because the vibrations are more shallow. The vibrations are deeper than a lot of the CEN toys that I’ve sampled, however. The pulsation settings are more effective because of this.

Still, I was surprised at how much I enjoyed Mia. Its cylindrical design was thin enough to slip between my lips and I could rest the vibrator in my panties while doing something else, such as reading erotica, for instance. Mia provides more acute stimulation than I usually go for but it still got me off, several times, and with varying degrees of satisfaction. Much of this is probably due to the amazing erotica that I was reading but I quite liked the shape of this vibrator.

The noise level is quite minimal. In this area, Mia succeeds.

After my first use, I wiped Mia down with a cleansing wipe but I noticed some gunk had gotten under the cap, around the charging area. I wouldn’t go overboard with lubes and would even be careful with this vibrator if you’re a squirter because of this. I haven’t had any issues with the cap coming off, it’s just not that seamless.

Like other Lelo toys, Mia comes with a satin storage bag. Unlike other toys, the box is much smaller because there is no need for space for the charging adapter. While I initially liked Lelo’s boxes because they added something extra to presentation, I quickly found them to be bulky and less functional than I realized in the beginning. Mia’s box is much shorter and I might actually consider keeping Mia in the box.

I didn’t expect to like Mia as much as I do. I figured it would be novel–and it is–but it works, too. It’s probably not the most effective toy in my arsenal but I can see myself reaching for it in the future.

Find vibrators like this at one of the biggest selections of sex toys online at

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Vanity by Jopen #5

May 11th, 2011

Because I’ve already reviewed the Vr 6, I don’t want to rehash all the details. These two vibrators are quite similar and you can read all the details here. The most important difference between the #5 and #6 vibrators in this line is the shape. #5 has a shorter clitoral arm (only .75″) that balloons out slightly and doesn’t angle toward the body like the arm on #6. In addition to this, the shaft bulges slightly, narrows and bulges again. At the narrow point, there is a bit of flexibility so you can angle just the head. The clitoral arm is also much more flexible than the arm on #6. The shaft retains about the same amount of length as #6 (4.25″), although #5 isn’t nearly as wide at any point. The widest point is a circumference of 1.25″ so it falls toward the smaller end of the spectrum. The head is slightly bulbous and more angular, for more precise G-spot stimulation instead of the broad pressure that #6 provides.

However, Vr5 is also a rechargeable rabbit vibrator, made of velvety fuchsia silicone. There’s two motors that are controlled by separate buttons. California Exotics has used this button style before and I’ll remind you what I think about the way they function:

One push turns them on. Push and hold to increase intensity and push and release to turn it off. It’s similar to the Couture Collection wand I have. I can’t fault them because it works but I can say it kind of feels like they’re reinventing the wheel and that if you frequently use other toys that require you to push to get to the next setting, you may find yourself turning off the Jopen vibrators and this can be frustrating. Really, I like the style of the controls but I probably won’t be able to get used to them unless the entire sex toy industry adopts them.

Another difference is the location of the motors. In the Vr5, these vibrations are centered in the tip and mid-body, instead of directly in the clitoral stimulator. Thus, you get more internal stimulation with residual vibrations against the clitoris–if the clitoral arm even reaches yours. Unfortunately for me, that’s not really an option with the Vr5. Nevertheless, both vibrators I’ve had a chance to try have impressively strong and deep vibrations.

The claim is these this entire line is waterproof even though there’s no cover over the charging port and it seems to remain open all the time. However, I’ve not had any issues with this and other reviewers have even submerged their Vanity by Jopen vibrators while turned on with no ill effects. Cleaning is a breeze, with soap and water; although the material does collect lint. You can minimize it by storing this in the Jopen pouch that comes with every toy in the line. It’s large enough for the charging adapter as well but I found the bag to so big it’s unwieldy. I wouldn’t mind something a wee bit smaller.

Sadly, I prefer the shaft design of the Vr5, even though I probably would have been more apt to pick the Vr6 as a customer. Unfortunately, the short clitoral arm would just never work for me.

CEN Sexpert

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Love Bunnies

May 10th, 2011

Some bunny loves me.. but it’s not one of the Love Bunnies. I requested to review these tiny vibrators from Babeland because they’re absolutely adorable. I didn’t know if they’d get me off but tis the season for bunnies and bright colors and all that bollocks.

So the Love Bunnies come in a super colorful box. It’s definitely reminiscent of a child’s toy and you may even want to keep it out of your kid’s line of sight because of the design. While fun, it’s sort orf confusing. To add to the fun, the package comes complete with an “Official Adoption Certificate.” Lovehoney’s packaging is amazingly detailed with this product and I almost want them to come out with actual children’s toys.

The colorful Love Bunnies vibrator sits in a plastic holder inside the box, against a brightly colored backdrop. The bunnies themselves are pretty straight forward. A tiny bullet vibrator sits inside a bunny shape–complete with ears and tail. You have to uncap and remove a paper tab before you can use the Love Bunnies. There’s a single push button for the single speed. I found that it likes to stick so sometimes I have to press it twice or more to actually get it to work.

Of course, as any watch battery-powered toy, the vibrations a both weak and buzzy. They’re the type that I quickly become “numb” to after a short period. That is to say, I literally cannot feel them after a few minutes. This is a shame because the roundness of the Love Bunnies actually stimulates me in a way that I find quite enjoyable. You may prefer to surround your clit, nipples or other sensitive parts with the ears but I like round shapes and pressure rather than pinpoint stimulation. The Love Bunnies actually provide both, unlike some other novelty vibrators (coughIRubMyduckiecough).

What disappointed me even more was that, as I used the Love Bunnies vibe for the very first time, the batteries died–maybe 20 minutes in. As these type of batteries can be difficult and pricey to obtain, that’s definitely a major drawback. I toss toys that require speciality batteries or suck them dry into a drawer, rarely to be touched again.

Washing up was easy enough; although, I don’t know if these vibrators are supposed to be water or splash proof. There’s very little information in the packaging. As I began to type this, I didn’t even know what the Love Bunnies were made of. Silicone, as it turns out, but this information is sneakily printed on the bottom of the box.

So while cute and silicone, easy to use and packaged quite nicely, the Love Bunnies best get to hoppin’. They just don’t cut it.

Love Bunnies at Babeland Sex Toys


Bondage I Rub My Duckie Travel Vibe in Black & Red

May 5th, 2011

I think we’re all glad that this is my last review for any item in the I Rub My Duckie line. I’m kind of sick of repeating myself and I have officially drawn the line. No matter how cute these damned things are, I don’t need another one especially when they just don’t cut it.

The Black and Red Mini Bondage duckie is probably one of the best designs, in my not so humble opinion. The original bondage duckie is awesome but this color scheme is just spectacular. The details, from the spiked color to the corset lacing in front, are immaculate. The ball gag is adorable and, once again, the painted eyelashes indicates this duckie is female. As you can guess, this duckie is much less inconspicuous than its brothers and sisters so you’ll want to tuck it away when Mom and Dad visit (unless you’re parents are into BDSM!).

But aside from that, this duckie just doesn’t cut it. The shape doesn’t work well to stimulated any area or to hold while you struggle to get off. The spikes on this one can actually be a little uncomfortable or painful, too. It doesn’t float. The molding is sloppy and water gets into the battery area. The duckie flops on its side when in water (boo!). There’s only a single speed of vibration and the knob requires a bit more effort than a button. The vibrations are buzzy and ridiculously weak, as you would expect from a vibrator powered by a single AAA battery. You need a fingernail or steel, a coin or some other flat device to open the battery compartment in the first place. For its size and strength, the duckie is just far too loud. All the ridges and text and other crap on the bottom of the Bondage I Rub My Duckie Travel Vibe just create a ton of space for lubes and liquids to make themselves at home. I will never feel like any of the duckies are truly clean.

For $20, you can get a decent bullet and actually get off. Consider the duckie vibrators as novelty only.

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Jopen Vanity Vr.6

April 28th, 2011

I first ran across the Vanity by Jopen line a few months back. I was intrigued. Cal Exotics has really been trying to bring higher quality items to the market and while it was good to see that from one of the big five (four?), none of the products I’d tried really caught my interest. While better designed, they all lacked power. So while I was intrigued, I tried not to set my expectations too high because I’d been disappointed before.

Let me get straight to the point: Cal Exotics has finally gotten it right in terms of power. The Jopen Vanity Vr.6 has vibrations that show both great strength and depth. The vibrations are deeper than Lelo’s Ina, for example. For me, this means I don’t have to adjust them too much to find the right setting and my G-spot responds ridiculously well. When I turn on both functions, each with their own motor, it’s a damned experience. A++++ as they say on Ebay. Of course, no toy is really whisper quiet. You can hear this one; although, I can’t say it operates at an unacceptable volume level.

And turning them on is really easy. Cal Exotics has created two simply buttons. One push turns them on. Push and hold to increase intensity and push and release to turn it off. It’s similar to the Couture Collection wand I have. I can’t fault them because it works but I can say it kind of feels like they’re reinventing the wheel and that if you frequently use other toys that require you to push to get to the next setting, you may find yourself turning off the Jopen vibrators and this can be frustrating. Really, I like the style of the controls but I probably won’t be able to get used to them unless the entire sex toy industry adopts them.

Design-wise, the Jopen is attractive but not stunning. I still prefer the look of Lelo toys. The Vr6 is a bit boring with its all-over color but I have to say that, in person, it’s a lovely shade of fuchsia that just doesn’t show up very well in pictures. It’s slightly more pink/red than the images show and is more attractive. It’s still purple and that’s still majorly overused in sex toy design but it’s an interesting sort of purple.

I usually yell at people who do not explicitly spell out what a toy looks like in their review so the Jopen Vr6 is a rabbit vibrator that has a shape similar to the Lelo Ina. The clitoral arm curves toward the boy while the shaft curves upward, toward the G-spot. The shaft is quite thin but grows into a bulbous animal at the end. It’s a pretty typical design in terms of contemporary rabbit vibrators.

As I mentioned, the all-over color is due to the pure silicone exterior of the Vanity by Jopen line of toys. Like any claim of seamlessness, this isn’t quite the case. You can see it and feel it with your hand–although, not in use. It’s note one of those seams that’s going to let water in, however. In fact, California Exotics claims 100% waterproofiness despite the fact that you still plug the AC adapter into a port on the back of the toy. The port is snugly surrounded by silicone that retains its shape after you remove the charger, like some of the newer Lelo toys. To be honest, I never play with toys in the shower but I’m pretty messy when I clean them so as long as a toy holds up to soap and water, I’m fine.

Speaking of silicone, the texture on this one is velvety and, yes, attracts lint more than my couch during shedding season (that’s now boys and girls!). It feels nice to the touch, offers a bit of drag which could be a pro or a con for some.

I haven’t mentioned how this performed for me, because, well, it sucked. California Exotics has finally created a quality toy that I want to love and I just can’t. The specific design of the Vr6 just doesn’t sit right in my body. The shaft struggles for space, against my pubic bone, in my vagina. The bulbousness, the length and the angle all seem to be wrong for me even though the numbers (1.5″ diameter and 4.25″ insertable) are not intimidating. Pretty run of the mill. Yet, I can’t even fully insert this and because I can’t fully insert it, the clitoral arm comes nowhere near my clitoris. It just pinches against my pubic bone on the outside. So, really, they could call this the “Destroyer of Adriana’s Pubic Bone” and be right on the money. Nevertheless, I have long suspected that my bone sits at a unique angle and, perhaps, pokes out a little further into my vaginal canal so I suspect that most will not have that problem.

One thing I am happy to announce is the Cal Exotics is slowly introducing better packaging. The white box is simple and the logo may not be that impressive but it’s not a giant, plastic box that cuts you and breaks open during shipping. The company has also included a storage pouch with this vibrator. A gigantic, stretchy pouch that I could probably stuff one of my cats in. It’s huge. A little overkill, to be honest. There’s almost so much fabric as to be unwieldy.

So, hats off to some great improvements. Overall the Jopen Vanity Vr.6 is a pretty fantastically functioning toy but be sure to take your time when picking out the vibrator that’s right from you in this line. They all seem so similar but I’m willing to bet those subtle differences have an astounding effect.

Jopen Vr6



April 20th, 2011

The iRide certainly puts the “novel” into adult novelties. That is for sure. In pictures, it sometimes looks like it might be a smaller toy, something that simply sits between your legs, almost like those panty vibrators. It’s not. It’s a big honking piece of plastic and silicone in God-awful Barbie pink. It looks–and feels–like a real child’s toy. It certainly doesn’t have the sort of design that’s so sleek and attractive that the toy itself can arouse you.

When I got it in the mail, it was in a big box. The actual packaging is a medium box that is, again, reminiscent of something Barbie-esque. The iRide sits in a plastic holder inside the box. I quickly did away with the box. It’s not that much bigger than the toy but it’s neither discreet nor better than storing this giant vibrator on its own.

So, the iRide is kinda of like a saddle that turns up in the front and back. It sports an insertable, vibrating shaft and a round/semi-sphere nub for clitoral stimulation (supposedly). The base is made of hard plastic while the parts that touch the skin are soft, TPR in, again, Barbie pink. The shaft is approximately 4″ in length and tapers slightly toward its rounded end. Its pretty straight, all in all, and probably a bit big for a newbie. At the base, it has a diameter of 1.67″ so we’re looking toward the medium-large end of the spectrum (although it’s not huge by any means) The clitoral nub is pretty huge and only 1/2″ or so from the position of the shaft. Unfortunately, because of the ridge plastic and the nature of the design, the iRide offers absolutely zero customization. Either it works for you or it doesn’t. At a price of nearly $150, I would advise you think long and hard before purchasing this vibrator.

Despite its size, the iRide runs onl AA batteries. I guess I was expecting C cells. Doc Johnson crafted this one with a battery covery with springy sides that you pinch to remove (from the bottom of the unit) and an easy-insert battery pack that holds the 4AAs. Although I used some batteries that were probably less than fresh, I found the vibrations to be a bit buzzy. The shaft on the iRide is really comparable with some of the insertables I already own. It’s definitely enough to make me squirt but, of course, I prefer deeper vibrations in terms of sensation.

This is the type of toy that you have to mount so I lubed it up and tried it out. The TPR has enough give that insertion was easy enough but I quickly found that the angle of the shaft on the iRide and the angle of my vaginal canal are not suited for one another. I found myself leaning forward to that the shaft wouldn’t stab into the front wall of my vagina. Nevertheless, it still aimed in that general direction quite forcefully. The more I leaned forward, the further from the clitoral nub did my clitoris move. See, mine’s much further than 1/2″ from my vaginal opening, plus I’m a little fleshy, so the nub just wasn’t far enough out or away from the shaft to work.

Logistically, the shape of the iRide just wasn’t working for me. It seemed to be a bit too wide between my legs (only 5″ but when something’s snuggled up against your pussy, that seems a lot I guess) and kneeling like that left my much taller than the toy anyway. There wasn’t any way for me to to hunker down so I could really get to grinding or rocking with the iRide but I’ll be the first to admit that I’m got some curvy thighs on me so I’m not entirely surprised. It’s sad because there’s only so many positions you can do with this thing. While on the iRide I also felt a bit.. as though I were wearing a giant pad or diaper. It’s 12″ from stern to stern and that thought just isn’t one that’s really conducive to sexy time.

I do have one more complaint about the iRide. Simply put, this giant beast is a bitch to clean. If you go the soap and water method, you wind up rubbing on some soap or cleaner and have to shove it in your sink and turn it this way and that to rinse it out (like the baking sheets that are just too damned big for your kitchen sink) and I highly doubt this thing is all that water resistant as there’s no seal around the battery compartment. Otherwise, you can wipe it down with something like Pjur Med or Afterglow wipes but that’s a little less than ideal because the TPR catches lint and hair and such and it’s really essential to use running water to rinse those away.

I honestly think we’d all be better off spending our money on one really good vibrator and a position pillow with some sort of pocket that can hold our beloved vibrators. At least, that way, it’s possible to customized the toy.