The brevity of February always throws me off. All my bills are due at the end of the month, and February is the one month that I’ll be late on a bill (or forget to pay one in its entirety, oops). So it’s not surprising that the month is almost over, and I’ve yet to post this (recent concerns over my cat’s health don’t help).
But it’s February 2019, damn it, so this still counts.
To be honest, the short month is only one reason why I didn’t consume a lot of media about sex. However, I had a few ideas in mind that I could have included from last month.. if only I could remember them! I need to use a spreadsheet, y’all. Still, there are a few things I’d like to recommend.
Listen
I usually focus on sexuality topics when I write these posts, but there’s always room for a little love, right? I came across a suggestion for This American Life’s podcast about breakups last month. It’s a long one, so you might need several sittings to finish it. In this episode, the hosts talk to a few different people about the heartbreaks they’ve experienced and, in some cases, are currently experiencing. It’s incredibly comforting in its way. Heartbreak can feel so solitary, yet we’ve all been through it, and this podcast reminds us of that. Plus, Phil Collins makes an appearance.
Sunny Megatron talked to Midori for an episode of American Sex about communication and negotiation, and it was enlightening — even if you’re not into kink.
Watch
This TEDx talk by Dr. Lisa Diamond prompts the audience to analyze whether it’s a good thing to view sexual orientation as something with which we’re born or if it’s potentially harming the very people who it was intended to protect. In some ways, she counters whether this is just a biological essentialist argument for orientation. I shared the article on my Facebook page, where it was a little divisive. While I’m not ready to fully agree with Dr. Diamond, I appreciate that she got me thinking.
Read
I’ve just started Revolting Prostitutes: The Fight for Sex Workers’ Rights, which I will eventually review. I’m glad to include more writing about sex workers on my bookshelf; although, I’m not far enough to give my full opinion.
Another book that I recently read for review is Tongue Tied: Untangling Communication in Sex, Kink, and Relationships. I wasn’t intended on reading the book until I heard an interview of Stella Harris, the author, on American Sex that had me intrigued. Review coming soon!
Sex, Lies, and Pharmaceuticals: How Drug Companies Plan to Profit from Female Sexual Dysfunction by Ray Moynihan and Barbara Mintzes isn’t on my review list, but it is a book that falls squarely within my interests, and I will likely write a review here when I’ve finished it. It’s an interesting look at how big pharma wants to medicate female sexual dysfunction, which may not at all be dysfunction and simply a misunderstanding of the variations of sexuality. I definitely find myself skeptical about some of their views, but the book highlights some inner works of the medical and pharmaceutical industries that I wasn’t previously aware of.
Let me know if you’ve read, watched, or listened to any of these media. What did you think? Do you have any recommendations for me? Sound off in the comments!
I loved Stella Harris’s TONGUE TIED: UNTANGLING COMMUNICATION IN SEX, KINK, AND RELATIONSHIPS recently. It’s so thorough, kind, and clearly written, and it ranks with Emily Nagoski’s COME AS YOU ARE as the two most essential sexual health books I’ve read. I was really eager to read MOSTLY STRAIGHT: SEXUAL FLUIDITY AMONG MEN by Ritch Savin-Williams too; it’s intriguing, but a mixed bag. On the one hand, he’s very nonjudgmental of the various men, but the book puts WAY too much importance on PIV intercourse as an indicator of experience/sexuality, and I was uncomfortable with the way Savin-Williams seemed to emphasize the appearance/behavior of the guys’ female partners as indicators of the men’s true sexualities. Wednesday Martin’s UNTRUE really disappointed me, though a lot of the science is interesting. Martin was way too close to it all emotionally, and the way she inserted herself into the narrative all the way through made me uncomfortable. (If it had been marketed as a personal journey a la Steph Auteri’s great A DIRTY WORD, that would be different.) I felt like her sociological treatment of various ethnic and racial groups posited them as the “other” too often, though I’m sure it wasn’t intentional.
Thanks for the reply Trix. As most of my readers know, I loveloveloved Come As You Are and recommend it often. Tongue Tied certainly has its value, but I just wish it was a bit more consistent.
Also, I’ve heard interviews with Martin but haven’t read her book. Hmm!