Pleasurists #28

May 16th, 2009

gianmarcolorenzi2
Image by Andy Julia Photography.

Pleasurists is your round-up of the adult product reviews that came out in the last seven days from bloggers all around the sex blogosphere. Did you miss Pleasurists #27? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #29? Submit it here before Sunday May 18th at 11:59pm PDT. Please re-post this list on your own blog if listed.

Editor’s Note: Apologies this edition came out later than expected/desired! I was out of town in the beginning of the week with a dead laptop and didn’t have a chance to get to it until later than I liked. This round-up only has reviews submitted by May 10th at 11:59pm PDT in it, as if it was posted on Monday.

Want to win some free swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.

Madame Editrix
Scarlet Lotus St.Syr

On to the reviews…

Editor’s Pick

So what did it actually taste like exactly? Rancid eggnog mixed with broccoli water, pineapples, and garnished with a little nutmeg and a final hint (just a hint) of celery. It smells great. It smells like gingerbread cookies coated in cinnamon, it’s even a nice light brown color but do not be fooled! Once you actually mix this in water it turns green and has a taste not many people could stomach.

Editor’s Note: I think I love well-written humorous negative reviews, and this is definitely one of those. I couldn’t help laughing out loud at a few points, and while it doesn’t make me want to buy the product for any male I know it makes me want to read more of Average Joe’s reviews. Don’t you agree?
Vibrators

Dildos

Anal Toys

Lube, Bath Stuff, & etc.

BDSM/Fetish

Adult Movies/Porn

Miscellaneous

Comment


Pink Magnificent

May 16th, 2009

Pink Magnificent Dildo

Pink Magnificent Dildo

This is an archived review that I will no longer update. PinkCherry no longer sells this toy.

There are days when everything seems to go right. Or so I hear.  I cannot specifically recall having one. However,  I do recall a specific masturbation session which went very well. There I was, with a pink, glass dildo and some Wet Naturals lube. I wasn’t thinking about the dildo’s propensity to hold heat or the lack thereof (although it is a very nice feature of glass) as it warmed to my body temperature. I had better things to think about than the fact that I could sterilize it, if I wanted, by boiling it or popping it in the dishwasher (top shelf, no soap). No, I was focused on the feeling of the swirled shaft sliding in and out of my cunt, the smooth, engorged head probing deep inside (with a 3 3/4 ” girth at the shaft, this dildo isn’t like a meaty cock but the texture more than makes up for it).

My mind wasn’t visualizing the snake-like appearance of the shaft (you can see the swirling on the opposite side of the dildo which makes it seemed criss-crossed, like scales).  Perhaps the magnificent appearance is where its name comes from (the Pink Magnificent). I was relieved because the last swirled dildo I had used was actually a little uncomfortable but the tightly wrapped, spiral texture extends the full length (7.5″, 7″ of which are insertable) of this glass dildo. While I could easily feel the texture inside my pussy, the swirls were neither so high nor large that they caused discomfort.

What I felt, instead, was increasing pleasure. I soon recognized my body’s own response to a toy which is not only well made but well shaped; the lube was no longer the reason I was wet and growing wetter by the moment. Even realizing this, caused me greater satisfaction. It’s not every day the internal stimulation alone does so much for me. In fact, sex does not consistently produce such a result so that a dildo could do so on its first try was impressive. Perhaps this is why it’s called the Pink Magnificent.

During all of this, I  didn’t consider how the flat base of this dildo make it anal safe (although I might have thought it made a good handle). After all, I was enjoying is vaginally. I wasn’t considering the affordability (Don Wand’s glass toys cost just a fraction of the price of Pyrex glass dildos) or the thought which went into the toy (Don Wands provides a bulky, pillow bag for storage and protection as well as samples of Wet lube with their products) or its non-porous nature (good for folks like me who only like to wash up with soap and water).  I simply enjoyed the feeling of a glass dildo, larger than the rest of my collection, gracing my sex.

As arousal grew, I knew I would have to switch tactics. I would have to focus on clitoral stimulation in order to cum. The dildo slid easily from between my lips and was soon rubbing smoothly over my vulva, against my clit. Applying pressure, which is easy to do with such a hefty tool, soon brought forth an orgasm or two (maybe more, who’s counting?).

As sex faded from my mind, I was able to easily wash the Pink Magifnicent with soap and water, then let it dry before slipping it back into its storage pouch. I did take the time to consider how much easier it is to dry glass without having to worry about the smooth material picking up lint; it’s also why using glass requires little to no lube (however, I would always use al ittle lube with this dildo but I can choose silicone or water based to suit my mood).

I put the Pink Magnificent aside for a few days until I could return to it in a rational, not enamored, state of mind. Currently, I have a few thoughts (almost all of which are good). The Pink Magnificent is a sturdy, well-made dildo whose colour and texture give it a beautiful exterior. It feels unique and satisfying internally and the round, tapered head works well for clitoral play. Vaginal or anal play are both ideal and, because it can be sterilized, this glass dildo is safe for both. Frequent soap-and-water cleaning will more than suffice if you don’t plan to share it between holes or partners. However, I noticed that creases between the swirls on this toy are a  little more difficult to clean than other glass dildos I own. I would advise cleaning with a small brush or perhaps just a Q-tip to make sure the crevices are cleaned. Although I thought I had cleaned thoroughly with just my hands, I noticed the dildo retained some dirt and will have to keep this in mind for the future.

Nevertheless, Don Wands has produced a dildo which performs very admirably with their Pink Magnificent. Form and function are both tops, here and the price is very reasonable.

18 Comments


Sugasm # 165

May 14th, 2009

This is my first Sugasm submission but probably not my last.  My posts tend to be more appropriate for the Pleasurists list but I do like to think I write some quality articles here and there.

The best of this week’s blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #166? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the link list within a week and you’re all set.

This Week’s Picks
Blame it on the al-al al-al al-al-co-hol
“My legs were now spread and he was in between them.”

Dinner and a Show
“Before it disappeared completely, I gave it a twist at the base, causing it to vibrate.”

Sugarbutch Star: Matt (part two) – All Five Senses
“She takes her lipstick out of her bag and uncaps it, twists it up and paints her mouth subtly, softly.”

Mr. Sugasm Himself
Adieu ErosBlog?

Sugasm Editor
Sex Work And Honesty: Relationship Status

Editor’s Choice
A Long Slow Seduction Continued…

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

(Sugasm participants should re-post all the links above within a week. The following links may be excluded as long as you include all the above links.)

Thoughts on Sex and Relationships
The Asshole Standing Next To You
Sharp Shooter

NSFW Pics, Videos & Audio
Divini Rae Sexy Pictures – High Quality
Dunes
Jana Jordan
Laissez-faire (HNT)
Secretary is whipped by their bosses

Erotic Writing and Experiences
Back Home Tonight
The Best Friend (part 2)
Camera Shy 3
Drive Me Crazy
Not Enough #8
Her Favorite Positions – Part Two
Love Bites
The ‘N’ Word – a short story…
The Rossebuurt Gap Year: With Benefits
Skin
Spite
Strokin’
You Give Me Fever

Sex Humor
Lesbian Sex Coffee Analogy

BDSM & Fetish
At Your Service
Pornographic statue
Spanked on their delightful bare bottoms

Sex News, Reviews, and Interviews
Lelo Ella
Me and my Uniram
New Study Challenges Masturbation Numbers
Top Five Tuesday – FemDoms

Sex Advice
Firsts

Comment


X: The Erotic Treasury

May 12th, 2009

There is usually a book or two sitting on my nightstand and, up until now, they have been inconspicuous. Long novels whose covers are adorned with people on horses and flaming swords are a favourite (currently I am trying to finish a Robert Jordan novel but it’s been rough going; I look forward to finish Weis and Hickman’s Death Gate Series next). After all, I have loved fantasy for years. In the recent months, I have enjoyed Absolute Sandman 1 and 2 which are some impressive looking pieces by Gaiman (rest assured that his writing rivals, if not surpasses, the look of these books); these re-releases of his comics are extra large, colour-corrected, faux-leather bound, slipcased collection which weigh in at a whopping seven and one half pounds. I am no stranger to beautiful books. And books are no stranger to my bedroom, even erotic ones. But I’ve never had a book quite like X: The Erotic Treasury, grace my nightstand before. Chances are, neither have you.

On the surface, X shares some characteristics of other books I’ve turned to before bed. Like the Ultimate Sandman, it is hardcover and slip-cased, a reprinting of previously published works. Like 5 Minute Erotica, it is a volume of quality erotic writings from two dozen authors and it will most certainly turn you on. But that fact that it is like both of those books really makes it something else entirely. I don’t think anyone in the business of producing racy reading material has ever gone this route and I think this gives both the editor (Susie Bright) and the publisher (Chronicle Books) an edge over the competition. Quite simply, they did it first.

What is it that they did, exactly? They published a book of the best of the best, with a sexual twist. Susie Bright compiled two dozen stories, many of which were previously published in collections like Best American Erotica or Best Women’s Erotica, to tease and please us. With over 300 pages of erotic content, there is simply a lot more to this collection than others I have written. There’s really not much of a comparison.

On top of the quality stories, the powers that be also decided to make X a book that was also pleasing to the eyes. Slightly larger than most erotica, this hard cover book is encased in red fabric featuring a floral-esque motif in a not-quite black pattern. The font and back covers are bare and I’ve opened the book upside down a time or two but this is not something about which I am overly concerned. On the spine of the book, you will find the name of both the editor and anthology in a very complimentary gold tone. The book fits comfortably in a slipcase which features the same floral design, with colours switched (the not-quite-black is more predominant). On the front of the slipcase, the letter X has been cut so the cover of the book itself will show through. It’s really quite impressive.

Ms. Bright did a wonderful job editing – I noticed no typos or other publishing errors – as well as picking the stories/authors to publish. The caliber of writing in this book is extremely high. It makes me ashamed when I think my writing is any good. The pieces showcased in X are by talented, articulate wordsmiths who are not afraid to express themselves. You can start from the beginning or end or anywhere in between and find yourself immersed in great story telling.

The stories are of varying subjects, some of which may be considered taboo. They are not your run-of-the-mill erotica written by a bored housewife; they are each truly unique stories. Some are scenarios more creative than my fantasies will ever be, while others are the result of creative minds, skillfully retelling stories, familiar to us all, in ways that seem refreshed. If I have any criticisms of X, is it not about quality of stories.

As a testament to the quality of these pieces, I can tell you that I found myself being aroused, more than once, by situations which I do not necessarily consider erotic because the writer is simply that good. This is the case with Michael Dorsey whose story “Milk” revolves aruond a Ukrainian engineer living in Russia, following a harsh winter when milk is in high demand. After searching the entire day for the elusive liquid to sate his thirst. He finds his salvation, close to home, and suckles from a mother’s breast. I have never been a fan of this scenario. Even as I write, I do not like it. Yet, when I read it, Mr. Dorsey’s words turned me on.

Of course, there were plenty of scenes which are more typically arousing for me, and proved to be in this book. One piece “The Man Who Are Women,” chronicles a night of drunken debauchery in which a young man accepts a dare to perform oral on random women, while blindfolded. Oral sex is always a winner for me and this story was no exception.

I also enjoyed Peggy Munson’s “Fairgrounds” which touched on disability and gender play as well as “Red Light, Green Light” by Shanna Germain whose words paint a picture of a women partaking in traditional activities in Amsterdam’s red light district (with a twist, of course).

Of course, I didn’t expect to like every story in this book. I wasn’t nearly as fond of a few works like “Must Bite” which included a bit of bestiality or “Jealous Husband Returns in Form of Parrot” by one Robert Olen Butler. Although both of these were sexual, I just didn’t find them sexy, especially the former which took an awful long time to get to the point.

I think these examples illustrate, quite well, what I see as the biggest faults of this collection. First, unlike 5 Minute Erotica, these pieces are not necessarily short. Some are short (for better or worse) but most are longer. This isn’t a problem if I like the content or at least the style of writing but a long piece which I do not like, as compared to a short one, seems that much worse. Even pieces which contained arousing parts sometimes took too long to get to the “good stuff” for my taste. I suppose I just like my erotica quick.

Secondly, because these are simply outstanding pieces, some of them simply are not erotic to me. I followed some of them with interest because the story teller was gifted and the story itself was interesting but I thought to myself, more than once “Well, it’s good but it’s not turning me on.” This was the case with a futuristic story about some sort of cyborg who got off to computerized women in the form of software (“The Portable Girlfriend”). Another story involved the coming of age of a man who has spent his life with a pair of women who embodied every teenager boy’s fantasy (think classic cheerleader), after being granted a wish (“Wish Girls”). I liked the story and was interested in what happened to the main character. Yet, it was written in such a way that something I would normally find erotic just wasn’t.

The high quality writing contained within these pages sometimes seems to lack the down and dirty sexuality of most erotica. However, these common ideas can be the most arousing. Occasionally, I would find myself wondering if high quality writing and erotica were not mutually exclusive. It seemed like some of the authors preferred hinting at the sex or writing a story which involved sex but was not necessarily about it. I know this is not always the case, as X: The Erotic Treasury contained many well written pieces which did involve blatant sexuality; yet others made me wonder why they were chosen with this book.

I suppose it must take just as skillful a writer to take something I would generally consider erotic and turn it into something simply interesting, as it does to take the mundane or anti-erotic and make it arousing. Rest assured, all of the authors who have had work included in X: The Erotic Treasury have written pieces worth reading (as is this collection worth perusing). I’m just not sure all of them belong in an anthology of erotica.


15 Comments


Sex Toys For Mother’s Day?

May 8th, 2009

If you opt-in to any sex toy retailer newsletters, then you’ve probably seen some deals for Mother’s Day. If you’re like me, you might find this a bit odd and some body scrub and massage oil might be a better gift. Lucky us, there’s a contest going on at Helping Mommys Win and the prize is just that. Whether you want to gift it to your mom, you’re a mother yourself or neither applies, why not enter?

Comment


Trojan Vibrating Touch Fingertip Massager

May 7th, 2009

I have now used vibrating products from both the big names in condoms – Trojan and Durex – and while these products seem to be great for beginners, those companies will need to try harder if they want to make the giants like California Exotic run for its money.

For starters, Trojan needs to work on the commercial for its new finger vibe. If you ever tune into Oxygen late at ngiht, then you’ve probably seen the two young women giggling about that new toy from Trojan and whispering to eachother what it does. Even though the commercial wants us to believe that it’s okay to be curious about these things (after all, the older women behind them has one, too!), we can only talk about them while laughing nervously. It seems to me, the commercial would be more effective if the women were talking calmly and collectedly about this product. Really, that’s neither here or there but part of my motivation for trying out this finger vibe was because I hate the commercial so damned much. LOL

So once you get past the nervousness and purchase this toy you’ll be staring at a purple box exactly like Trojan’s Her Pleasure line of condoms because the Vibrating Touch is part of it. When I opened my mail, I was actually confused as to why I was receiving condoms, before I saw “Vibrating Touch.” I wouldn’t have minded if Trojan made the package a little classier (like Durex does with it’s Play toys) but am willing to look past this. Like most condom companies, Trojan provided a condom with their toy (Her Pleasure) and while I don’t need it, I could always use it with a questionable toy.

The finger vibe itself is in a plastic/foil bag. Inside the package is also a small velvet, drawstring pouch for storage. This looks exactly like small jewelry pouches so if someone ever finds your Vibrating Touch finger vibe while it’s in the bag, they probably won’t think twice. Keeping it on or in your nightstand or dresser would seem completely normal and it wouldn’t be out of place in your purse or even carry on luggage if you’re traveling. I have noticed that the drawstrings are rather long and my cats like to play with them, dragging the pouch all over my house because it’s so small.

The finger vibe itself itself is a squishy, purple sleeve with a loop to slip on your finger and a removable, 1 speed, mini-bullet. The material of the sleeve, which the packaging does not name (but there was not rubber smell) is really soft and has little ridges along the shaft and whorls, like a fingerprint, on the tip. While these are really fun to feel against my fingers, my clit didn’t detect the ridges and whorls so easily but I think the texture was better than a smooth sleeve. The stretchy loop on top of the finger vibe fit comfortably around my finger but I found that, during use, the position shifted up and down, just as the toy seemed to slip left to right and sometimes it wasn’t much better than using a finger to rub myself. I think this is because I use so much pressure.

And the reason I use so much pressure is because the bullet isn’t all that strong. It’s not bad for its size, but it’s definitely more of a gentle touch. I think this would be great for beginners but I’ve used some strong vibrators and really need something more now. Unlike similar toys, this bullet here is reusable so you don’t have to throw it away after 30 minutes of use; however you will need to change the batteries after 30 minutes. Unfortunately, it is powered by 2 tiny battery sizes which I have never before encountered called LR41. I accidentally dropped one when open the bullet and these could easily be lost so be careful when switching batteries.

As I mentioned, the bullet is removable which means you can use the sleeve on your finger alone if you want a really light touch. You could possibly fit a similar sized bullet in the sleeve but it is rather small. Or, if you just wanted to use the bullet alone, there is there option. For thorough cleaning, I like this because the bullet is not waterproof; however it looks waterproof and I washed the whole thing without problems. It’s also extremely easy to remove and replace the bullet.

The on/off button on the bullet is easy to push with my thumb while on my finger. I actually preferred wearing the fingertip massager on my middle finger because it’s longer. My fingers are rather short so the massager sometimes felt a little unwieldy but not horribly so.

Because this toy is so small, you could use it almost anywhere. At the computer (at home or work), in the car, in a airplane bathroom, under the desk at school, snuggled under a blanket with someone else in the room, you name it. I personally used it for a little afternoon stroll through the land of cybersex but I ultimately prefer my LayaSpot for this.

My final thoughts on this sex toyare that it’s cute and versatile but it’s gentle vibrations are better for someone who is either less experienced or prefers their vibration to be really light and it’s extremely quiet. I would like it if Trojan let us know what exactly the sleeve is made of

2 Comments


Firsts

May 6th, 2009

From birth, we are trained to commemorate our “firsts.” There is an entire self-publishing platform marketed for these firsts. It is called a babybook. And into these books for locks of hair and hand prints and those first tiny baby booties that seem too small to be real. Other, less tangible and sometimes more bulky, memories fit into the baby book in the form of photos or stories and we fawn over the books almost as much as the babies until, somehow, someway, they wind up in the bottom of a drawer or in the back of the attack, gathering dust.

But that is neither here nor there. However it does go to show that, as a society, we obsess over firsts. It’s in our veins, if you will. Sex is no exception, either. In fact, it might be the epitome of firsts. The “big one”. Virginity. Of course, we don’t put pictures of that in a book (well, some might).

There is a fine line to walk. Certainly I think making that the decision to lose one’s virginity should not be done so lightly. On the other hand, it placing too much significance on the cherry poppin’ can cause a lot of unnecessary stress.

I told all this to a good friend who felt a bit left out. Perhaps “left out” is not the right way to describe it. She was sick and tired of the world saying “But you don’t know what you’re missing!” and feeling like a freak. Yet, she was also afraid of all of that inevitable stuff; you know, the pain and bleeding, the emotional trauma and heartbreak after he leaves. She wanted it to be perfect, like in the movies.

Having sex for the first time is a lot of things, but perfect isn’t one of them. I told her that. I told her that if she waits forever she may miss out on something worthwhile but if she really wasn’t ready, she didn’t have to prove anything to anyone, not even herself.

“It’s easy for you to say,” she responded. Maybe it is easy for me to say. Maybe the decision was easier for me. After all, I lost it to someone who I loved and who loved me in return. I was in a happy, long term and, until 3 days before the act, long distance relationship. There was never any doubt as to whether or not it would happen, just when (quickly, if you didn’t catch on).

And I married my first, which some might think as a happy ending. Although, truthfully, there’s some sacrifice to it, too. I probably won’t ever have the opportunity to explore my sexuality with anyone else, a fact which is both comforting yet frightening at the same time. Of course, one could argue that he does not get to explore anymore of his sexuality with anyone else but we all know that I am the best he’ll ever have in all ways. 😉 (And really, I like to think that what we bring to the table for one another makes it worthwhile in the end.)

I guess I was lucky, too. My first time wasn’t painful or bloody. It wasn’t necessarily pleasureful and while it was awkward and not glorious, it felt right. It wasn’t a drunken one night stand. He didn’t break up with me the next day and while it wasn’t all fireworks, I wouldn’t call it disappointing. But I think I went into it with realistic expectations. I think that’s harder for females to do. Sex mimics masturbation for guys and most of them have done so by their first time but it’s not like that at all for girls. We hear the horror stories and we expect to feel like a chainsaw is ripping us apart. Apprehension runs rampant when you fear for your life.

I didn’t expect anything to change, and it didn’t. Except that we were now having sex all the time and I could talk about it with my other deflowered friends (Hey, it was cool). That is crucial to making a memory of your first time that will make you smile rather than haunt you from there on out. My friend, like many people, thought that sex will change something, sometimes something that has been horribly wrong with the relationship as long as anyone can remember.

But sex is not a miracle cure. To be cliche, sex is like putting a band-aid over a bullet hole. Even if it does seem to work, at first, it won’t be long term. Frequently, the wound festers even more because of the superficial healing. When everything comes out, it’s that much worse.

Which was why I shied away from telling her to go for it. In a healthy relationship, sex can do a lot for you but he had been pressing for sex for months and she had simply wanted him to apply himself to their relationship. I had my suspicions and, like the good friend who lets others make their own mistakes, kept my mouth shut. Needless to say, I wasn’t surprised when the outcome was a little disappointing. Things may have seemed better initially but the same problems resurfaced.

And she felt hurt. She had given him something you could never put a price on and his actions seemed to disregard her gift. Her feelings, while understandable, also reflect the disappointment of countless people who expect too much for sex, either out of desperation or because they simply don’t know what to expect.

In the end, no one can prepare you. You can be prepared for the worst but, then, you won’t ever be able to reap the benefits of sex. You can expect Hollywood with perfect bodies and simultaneous, screaming orgasm. You can put your life on hold waiting for the impossible. Or you can accept that it will happen how it happens, knowing that the fantasies we entertain can never be reality.

A little awkwardness will not ruin everything. It may even make the memory sweeter. In the end, you won’t be left with a photograph of what went wrong, but of the feelings of the moment. If you’re too busy lamenting and picky at the faults, it won’t be much of a feeling.

You only have one “first” with sex but, just like anything else, you have plenty of time to get it right, even if things don’t turn out as expected.

12 Comments