Confession

February 20th, 2016

Listen. This sucks.

I really, really, really like you.

I like you so much that it scares me. It’s always scared me. I fell too hard and too soon. And that was okay as long as we both thought you were into it, too.

But, even then, I thought this was too good to be true. As much as I thought “finally, this is it!”, I was terrified that it wasn’t.

And going from talking half the day away to not speaking at all is hard, okay? Fucking hard. I simply miss your presence, our wordplay, the laughter you brought to my life. I miss it all.

It’s no mystery why I would fall for you.

Maybe the hardest part of it is how I am falling away from you. Just another person for me to get over.

And I’m getting far too good at that.

 

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On Life’s Unfairness

February 3rd, 2016

Time always slows down when I’m waiting for a tongue to make contact. It’s excruciating.

And then it does. And I melt. The tongue is an amazing muscle, so soft and warm and capable. Nothing comes close.

That’s really the only thing I miss when I’m not fucking someone. I can abuse my pussy with a toy until my hips hurt the next day, but a mouth!

The mouth doesn’t even matter when I’m about to cum because I’ll be pulling your hair and grinding my hips against you so hard that it doesn’t matter who or what is between my legs so long as something is. And I get off.

But the second best part is when you come up for air and I kiss you, and you smell and taste like me. Absolutely delicious. I think I was surprised when I realized just how much I love my taste, and I can;t get enough because I will never be able to do what you just did to me.

I think I was surprised when I realized just how much I love my taste, and I can;t get enough because I will never be able to do what you just did to me.

And it’s not fair that you get to fuck me and lick me and make me cum like that. I’d kill to be the person who gets to fuck me.

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Point of View

February 1st, 2016

Him

He rummages through a drawer, selects something with careful consideration. Stepping toward her, he reaches out, producing the item. It’s a gag he’s carefully chosen. Instead of the ball is a miniature silicone cock. She purchased this one specifically because it fit inside her small mouth better than most.

Her eyes light up and jaw slacks open. She doesn’t even realize it’s happening, he thinks to himself. Her mouth is practically agape as he traverses the distance between them — just a few steps really — a silent beg to be filled. His cock has been stirring since he first laid eyes on her tonight, and the lascivious response has him fully erect now.

Rather than strap the gag around her head, he reaches for his own belt, letting the gag drop to the floor. The black leather is supple and warm from his own body temperature as he releases the buckle. The button and zipper follow, all the while his eyes remain locked on hers. He hasn’t allowed her to break eye contact since they broke from their first kiss.

She’s reluctant to break that gaze as he moves his hand to the back of her head, gently pushing the young woman to her knees in front of him.

“If your mouth is so hungry for a cock, girl, then I’ve got something to gag you with,” he snarls. But his touch is gentle as he strokes her hair, nudging her beautiful mouth closer to his open fly. Carefully, she reaches into his boxers to release his cock. Now free of its constraints, his member points toward the sky, engorged and darkening as blood rushes to the spot.

He pushes his cock toward her mouth like he had planned with the gag. Her lips stretch open around him as she takes her cock into her mouth. Her mouth is warm and wet, and he sighs as she envelopes him.

Her

She’s been waiting all night to taste him. She hopes her impatience hasn’t been obvious. While he’s never been one for punishment, it doesn’t strike her as terribly ladylike to let it show.

She had to steady herself as he brought her to her knees. She wanted to fall straight down and rip his cock free from his boxers. But she knelt gracefully. She allowed him to set the pace. She languishes both in pleasure and pain as the seconds seemed to stretch forever.

She was rewarded for her restraint. She always is. And now his cock, in all its heat and rigidity, is sliding into her mouth. He’s larger, both in width and girth, than the gag he was holding before, and she focuses on relaxing her throat at the head of his cock moves toward the back of her mouth. Her breaths are measured and careful through her nose, and she squeezes her eyes shut and she begins to work his cock.

She can feel his eyes on her, on the top of the head and traveling down her back toward her ass, which is resting on her ankles. She could feel his gaze on her all night, from the first time she stepped into the room. It never made her feel self-conscious, however. She felt his lust but also his adoration and approval. It made submitting to his every whim thrilling, despite her typical resistance to taking commands.

And as she slides her tongue along his shaft and around the head of his cock, seals her lips around his skin and suckles gently, there isn’t a single part of her that resists. She’s so content to kneel in front of him, to service his cock, that time seems to melt away around her.

Him

He feels the tension rising in his body as he gets closer to orgasm. It happens exactly as expected from her mouth expertly working his member. Almost like clockwork, his testicles tight and taut, move closer to his body. He strokes her hair, the side of her cheek. He can feel his cock through the side of her face. His fingers break contact, and he reaches for her chin, carefully lifting and pushing her back.

As his cock leaves her mouth, trails of her saliva hang in the air. He feels suddenly cold, his dick devoid of her warmth. But he’ll soon rectify that.

As he pulls her to her feet, she again makes eye contact. There’s an eager twinkle that he finds both charming and arousing at once. He places his hands on her shoulders and turns her body away from him. His eyes pass over the swell of her ass, highlighted by the classic black dress she’s wearing. He leans forward to unzip the silver zipper, revealing her pale flesh beneath.

He slides a hand beneath the fabric at either shoulder to push the dress down her shoulders, and he can feel her shiver against his touch. He wonders what the expression on her face looks like and if her eyes are open. Without visual confirmation, he can only guess.

The dress falls to the floor, exposing her lingerie-clad body. A red bra wraps around her back, the lacy band adding texture against her smooth skin. Per his instructions, she’s wearing a classic black garter belt to hold up her thigh-high stockings. Three stripes of material wrap around the middle of her thighs, but the rest of her body is bare.

He drops his gaze from her back to the curve of her butt. Instinctively, he reaches out with a hand and smacks the bare skin at the fleshiest part of her ass. She yelps, at first moving away from him. But then she backs toward him, bending slightly at the waist, to give him better access. His little pain slut. She makes it too easy.

Her

She’s standing in front of him, slightly bent. Her ass feels warm and tingly from the unexpected smack. Her pussy feels even hotter, aching for more skin contact. It’s not enough for her to simply feel his gaze anymore. But she knows she must stay in the position he’s put her in.

It seems like an eternity that she’s standing there, with what feels like miles of space between them. She practically jumps out of her skin when he finally reaches out, tracing his fingers lightly down her spine. He slides them over the garter belt, and his hand cups her ass and pushes her forward.

When her knees touch the bed, she kneels on the mattress. His hand on her ass moves between her legs, fingers just pressing into her cunt. She feels him pull upward, raising her ass toward him. She leans her shoulders toward the bed with her back arched in the way she knows he likes.

She stays in this position while he rustles about in the toy box once more. She wonders what he might be looking for but doesn’t have to wait long before she sees him approach from the side and grab one of her wrists. Her arm is stretch outward and upward as he secures a cuff to the bed frame. He walks around the other side and repeats the motion with her other arm.

She can already feel the ache in her shoulder blades as her weight shifts and hangs in this position. She anxiously waits for him to finish his work as he moves behind her and pushes her thighs apart with his knees. Then, her ankles are being secured into cuffs attached to a spreader bar. She feels the cool breeze move against her ass and the exposed flesh of her pussy lips. But it’s the appreciate noise that he makes that makes her shiver.

Him

He seems her bound, open and ready for him. If possible, his cock seems to grow even harder. He hasn’t put a blindfold on her, but she’s facing away and can see what he’s doing. He’s sure she can hear his trousers hitting the ground. The belt buckle jingles as it lands in a pile around his ankles.

He steps forward and places a hand on each cheek in front of him. He squeezes and pushes them outward to reveal her puckered asshole. He’s made it a home for his cock many times in the past, and he certainly will again.

But it’s her pussy that he wants to drive his cock into again and again. The head of his cock nuzzles her lips, searching for the entrance to the place he’s so come to cherish. He guides his cock into her hole. It takes no effort for him to penetrate her with every in of his dick. She’s amazingly wet, obviously turned on beyond belief. He’s impressed with the amount of restraint she’s shown thus far.

He’s having a hard time showing as much restraint. She’s wrapped around him tightly, and he groans in response to the sensation. Her own feminine moans echo his as his thrusts begin to pick up speed. He positions her hips so that every stroke will graze her most sensitive spot, and he reaches around with one hand to rub her clitoris.

Her nub is already hard when his fingers press into her. Despite her restraints, he can feel her rocking her hips to grind his body against his hand. He presses his palm firmly against her as if to pin her body between hand and hips. in response, she pushes her hips even closer to his, slightly rotating as he thrusts. Their hips find a way to move in sync, his fingers complementing their rhythm.

He pays close attention to her sighs, her uninhibited moans and her ragged breaths. As if on cue, he rubs her hard, faster. He knows the signs of her impending orgasm, and he doesn’t let up as it approaches.

She forgets to move her hips as she comes, muscles contracting around his cock. He forgets composure as he bellows loudly, his cock pulsing and emptying into her pussy. It never fails to make him come, the way her muscles feel when she comes unbound.

He smiles and stops his thrusts, simply resting inside her. This, he thinks, is where he belongs.

She agrees.

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6 Guys I Don’t Want to Have Sex With

January 20th, 2016

1. The Guy With the Big Dick Who Thinks That’s All It Takes

Sure, there’s something awesome about a dick that’s just big enough to stimulate the G-spot, and I feel like a champ when i take an especially big dick. But having a big dick alone is not enough, folks. If you just stick to the in-and-out, it can be boring and painful and the big dick inside my vagina is unlike to do anything for my clit. I would much rather sleep with someone less endowed but more skilled. Sorry.

2. The Inexperienced Guy

I am sure there are plenty of people who have little to know experience who will eventually make wonderful lovers. I’m just not the person to teach them. I’ve no problem telling you what I like or don’t, but sometimes that’s easier to articulate than others. And sometimes it’s just nice to be in experienced hands and to let go of thinking and just be.

3. The Guy Who Won’t Go Down on Me

I can’t say that I need this every single time, but it’s gotta be something that happens at least 75% of the time I have sex with someone. It’s almost a guaranteed orgasm, and even if it weren’t, getting eaten out feels intimate and divine in a way that I am not willing to live without.

4. The Guy Who Never Listens to Me

My ex-husband was a terrible kisser, like, to the point that I feel bad for his new wife. He opened his mouth too far, didn’t move his lips and was incredibly sloppy. Kissing him often made my own mouth feel chapped or sore. I tried to bring it up, gently of course. Time and time again. He was acknowledge me, seemingly open to my suggestions. Nothing ever changed. The kiss thirty seconds after I requested something would be exactly the same.

I can’t do this, not ever again. It’s one thing if you’re a little self involved or aren’t as good at reading body language as some people. But when you actively want advice and then ignore it repeatedly, I am done.

5. The Guy Who Is Intimidated by My Toy Collection

There’s an interesting thing that happens when someone finds out I have toys and they like it: I am simultaneously aroused and a little frightened by the prospect of using them together. This is because the way I masturbate is so different than the way I have sex, and using toys together seems like a melding of the two.

But that anxiety is absolutely better than someone who won’t ever use toys with me or, even worse, someone who thinks I shouldn’t use them just because I am am actively having sex with other people. Nope nope nope.

6. The Guy Who Is Incredibly Vanilla

This was definitely a roadblock when it came to the last guy I had sex with. He was just boring in bed. To be fair, he was boring outside of bed. His routine was the same. Am I talking about his everyday life or sex? Does it matter.

There’s a thrill that comes from being slightly-less-than vanilla. Call it chemistry or sexual tension. No matter what you call it, though, sex isn’t really worth having without it. I know they say that sex is like pizza because “even if it’s bad, it’s still okay.” But I have to disagree. Pizza and sex aren’t worth having most of the time if they’re not at least good enough. I’ll stop halfway through and do something better with my time.

And maybe that’s why I’m the type of woman who many men would rather not have sex with. I’m okay with that.

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Ooh by Je Joue What Happens In Vegas Kit

December 31st, 2015

More often than not, when a company tries to do something new, I am not impressed. Especially when the resulting product is trying to do too many things at once. There’s a reason why rabbit vibes are either loved or hated: it’s really difficult to do multiple things right simultaneously.

I’ve also had a luke-warm relationship with JeJoue in the past. The only thing I’ve really liked from this company is Sasi, which is now discontinued, and mine never quite worked right, anyway.

So I cannot begin to express how excited I am that JeJoue has finally mastered the dual-purpose motor/vibrator attachment toys in a way that every.other.company has thus far managed to fuck up. You’re probably not surprised if you read this Facebook update.

I have never liked inserting the tiny bullets into Tantus dildos. I didn’t have any interest in the Rocks of bullet and compatible attachments. Fun Factory has a rechargeable bullet that I might like, but I’m hesitant to try. I turned up my nose at We-Vibe’s pleasure mates. So I’m not exactly sure what made me decide to ask for the Ooh by Je Joue What Happens In Vegas Kit from SheVibe, but I am glad.

Let me say, though, this naming sucks. It’s long and bulky and confusing. But that’s totally irrelevant in the grand scheme of things.

So this kit is two attachments — cock ring and insertable vibrator — along with a motor that can be used with either. It can also be used with a clitoral attachment called the Pebble, which even comes in bright yellow! You don’t get to choose colors in the kits, though, but you do get to choose which toys you’d like. There’s a kit with the internal and clitoral vibrator attachments, or you can get the cock ring and the clitoral attachment in a kit together. Each of the attachments can be purchased separately from SheVibe, but you’ll need a kit to get the first motor.

Ooh by Je Joue What Happens In Vegas Kit motor

Tiny motor!

The tiny motor — and you wouldn’t believe how small it is — easily clicks into place into each of the attachments. It can go in either way; there is a button on either side that corresponds to an indent in the silicone that you press to operate it. The button is the only thing I don’t really love. It’s indented, which makes it hard to get at with fingernails. This won’t be an issue for anyone, but a convex button would be the better option.

It’s easy to use the toys, and the vibration settings are pretty standard: high, medium and low steady vibrations; a pitter-patter pulsation that is super interesting and a regular pulsation. Could it be, for the first time in history, that Adriana likes a setting that’s not steady vibration? Maybe! You simply click the button to move between the settings or hold it for a few seconds to power on and off.

When it’s time to swap the attachments, there are handy arrows etched into the silicone. When you squeeze here, the motor is ejected easily. It’s super clever and works so well. I tend to bend and pull vibrators toward me during using, and the classic vibrator in this kit took it like a champ, and the motor remained securely in place.

Inside the attachments and arrow for ejecting the motor.

Inside the attachments and arrow for ejecting the motor.

I haven’t had a chance to use the cock ring with a partner, but it’s incredibly stretchy. Because there’s no rigid casing, the vibrations travel a bit better through the material. But the motor is heavier than other vibrators, and I feel as though this could potentially get a little uncomfortable. But if you keep the motor side up, it can stimulate your clitoris while the ring is wrapped around your partner’s penis.

Because the charging port is actually inside the toys when you use them, it’s fully encases in silicone and waterproof. There’s a little flap over the charging port. And you guys won’t believe this: it charges through standard Micro-USB! This is the same charger as your Android devices use. Words cannot describe how excited I am over this.

What really has me thrilled is how this tiny motor manages to vibrate so deeply. If Je Joue can do it, why can’t other companies? Why do so many clitoral vibrators suck? Why has it taken sex toy companies so long to please me in such a way? Why, God, why?

Melodrama aside, this is a fantastic toy. The classic vibrator attachment isn’t huge, but it flares out and there’s a rigidity that makes it work quite well for G-spotting, even though it’s not all that curved. Je Joue will soon be offering a G-spot vibrator attachment specifically, a “Flexi G-spot” vibrator, which bends — probably similar to Je Joue’s Uma — and a few plug options.

The more I discover about these kits, the more I like it. There’s quite a few other shapes that will soon be available. There will also be a mini motor. It’s hard to imagine a motor that’s any smaller than the one that came in my kit, which is technically a large, but this will work with a smaller cock ring and a mini Pebble attachment. I suspect this motor would be less powerful and more buzzy, and I’m quite happy with the size of the motor that came in the What Happens in Vegas Kit.

There’s a bit more to know about these kits and the options available to you before you make a purchase. But I suspect Je Joue will be making many consumers happy with the ability to mix and max shapes and motors to create your perfect sex toy collection.

SheVibe

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DOMINIX Deluxe Leather Wrist to Thigh Restraint

December 29th, 2015

There are certain things that have the right smell, taste or touch that instantly make  you feel sexy. I would argue that the DOMINIX Deluxe Leather Wrist to Thigh Restraint aris e one of those things. From the instant I smelled the leather to the first touch, both of the unfinished suede and the finished leather side, I was hooked. This is the type of item that you lust over, the type of thing you write into your fantasies — or even the one thing that gets you back into the habit of fantasizing.

With as many toys, ties and treats as I’ve tried, it’s hard for anything to do that to me (for me? anymore, but the DOMINIX Deluxe Leather Wrist to Thigh Restraint does.

So what exactly has me so gaga?

They feel high-quality. It’s the leather. It’s the firm stitching. It’s how I can pull on them with arms, spreading my thighs further, without any worry of them giving way. It’s the buckles, shining and secure around my wrists and my thighs. It’s the type of thing that makes you say “$47 is not only affordable but even a steal for these goodies!”. And I would say that. I’m saying it to you now.

It’s the leather. I love leather. I’ve tried vegan leather. I’ve had rope, fur, metal and foam cuffed around me. But there’s nothing quite like leather, with its intoxicating smell. The textured treatment of the exterior of these cuffs is interesting to touch and feel. The soft insides rest against my flesh, holding me enthralled, and the bordered hems give it a completed feel.

It’s the simplicity of binding thighs to wrists. The more you struggle from your upper body, the further open your legs spread. More often than not, I want to pull them closed as I cum, but these cuffs won’t let me. It’s my body being a an instrument of my own torture, if even torture it can be called.

But enough with the waxing poetic. You know that I love the DOMINIX Deluxe Leather Wrist to Thigh Restraint. Will you?

They aren’t quite perfect, either. Because the buckle secures on another layer, you have to be careful if you want them to make a complete circle around a wrist and nestle the layers in securely. Think of how you make the two layers of your belt lie flat. If your wrists are especially small, the buckle will always join the two sides of the cuffs at an angle. This doesn’t affect performance. It’s just not aesthetically appealing to me.

Furthermore, these cuffs are best for straight sized people. I have 8-inch wrists — larger than your average bracelet but smaller than many men’s wrists. You can only secure wrists up to 10.5 inches in diameter with these cuffs. It seems a little small to me, but leather comes at a premium price, so I understand why the company would err on the side of smaller.

The thigh cuffs are both wider (2″ compared to 1.5″ for the wrist cuffs) and longer for obvious reasons. The cuffs range from 19 inches to 28 inches, depending upon which hole you use. You could potentially move them further down your thighs, toward your knee, if they’re too small for the fleshier part. However, I do like how they look further up the thigh! I have both muscle and fat in my thighs that makes them fairly wide, and I can wear the cuffs at the fleshiest point with them buckled at the third hole in, but there’s not a lot of give, there. If you’re plus sized, you might consider another option for thigh bondage.

DOMINIX Deluxe Leather Wrist to Thigh Restraint

DOMINIX Deluxe Leather Wrist to Thigh Restraint

You’ll probably want to secure the thigh cuffs toward the inside or underside of your thighs, so the wrist cuffs will face up or out. I find it’s easiest to secure them first around thighs, then to add your wrists into the mix. I can easily do one thigh and wrist by myself, but it’ll require a second person to secure the other side. once they are secure, they won’t come loose; although, there’s no way to put a padlock on them. They’re not that hardcore.

Because of the design, you’re going to have extra material dangling if you wanted to use these just as thigh or wrist cuffs — they don’t separate. Nor is there a loop or hook so you could attach them to other bondage gear. But they’ll work well for someone who is kneeling, lying on a bed, sitting on a chair so on and so forth.

Like under the bed restraints, the DOMINIX Deluxe Leather Wrist to Thigh Restraints use the bound person’s strength and body against them, which makes them more enticing than I originally expected. And at under $50, they’re really something you ought to try!

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There Are Other Fish in the Virtual Aquarium

December 23rd, 2015

I’ve been putting off writing an update about the guy I met for several reasons. I am confused. I’m not sure how I feel, but I suspect there’s not as much potential as I originally thought or as I’d like there to be. It would be so nice to finally be dating someone again. Except when I miss how much time I had to myself when I didn’t have to work another person into my schedule and before I was spending so much time talking to someone.

He’s not a terrible person, we’re just incompatible in ways that are more than likely deal breakers. And this is certainly exacerbated by changes I’ve made over the several years — becoming more liberal leaning, identifying as a feminist and focusing on sex and how I can help others around me better enjoy their sexuality. This manifests itself in ways, perhaps small, but that I cannot help but notice.

For instance, I flinched when he used the word “whore” in a casual sense to describe something he’s a big fan of. I awkwardly replied about how we shouldn’t refer to sex workers like that, but it wasn’t eloquent enough. I let it be. What am I going to do, start a conversation about the trials and tribulations that people like Perth escorts have suffered through? Do I start a conversation filled with facts and stories from the latest Best Sex Writing anthology I’ve read?

You can bet that I would do this with certain people, but I think I realize deep down that it’s not worth the effort with this guy. We might wind up as friends, but certainly nothing more. Perhaps at some point my opinion on sex work and the rights that sex workers should — but typically don’t — have will come to light… only as friends. But there’s an awkward lack of discussion and thoughtfulness at this stage and the mention of Brisbane escorts wouldn’t help any.

It hasn’t all been a loss, however. It’s definitely interesting to learn how I interact with new people after developing a stronger sense of self. Seeing how I represent myself is satisfying, reassuring even. I am presenting myself the way I want to be seen, as the person who I know myself to be.

And adding another notch to my bedpost, going on some successful dates and breaking out my flirting skills reminds me that I’m alive, that people can desire me and that maybe dating isn’t as difficult as I thought it was in the first place.

 

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Tonight, I Met a Guy

December 12th, 2015

Tonight, I met a guy I’d been talking to online for a few days. It’s not a long story; although, it is interesting. To me, at least.

I’ve been playing a game called Ingress lately. It’s sucked up a lot of my time, and I’ve met a few new friends through it. Ingress is a local MMO, so I’ve been talking to and occasionally running into people in the area.

A few weeks ago, I came across the OkCupid profile of someone who plays the game because he uses the same name in both places. I hadn’t seen him being active in the game the entire time I’ve played, but he did create some missions in the area so I recognized the name. i didn’t message him because, to be honest, he’s not quite my physical type.

Fast forward a couple days and I see he’s become active in the game. Then, he messages me on POF the next day. I recognize his pictures and reply solely because we play the game and it’s an interesting coincidence. Instead of answering his questions, I complained — in a friendly manner — about him attacking me in the game.

This prompted some fairly consistent conversation back and forth. While I wasn’t quite sure if we clicked, we moved communication off site. We’ve had fun talking, and a lot of talking we’ve done. but as things seemed more like they could be something, I became even more anxious to meet him. And as someone who is already anxious to meet anyone, this isn’t a  great thing. To my credit, I was upfront about this. To his credit, he’s been incredibly understanding and helpful about it.

We’ve very missed each other by very short time frames playing our games, and I found this both amusing and, perhaps, a bit relieving because I didn’t have to meet him. He’s politely inquired a few times, and tonight went out specifically with the intent of crossing my path.. only i slipped back home after missing him by an entire two blocks and a few short minutes. I wound up going back out specifically to meet him when I saw he was out, and we met. Although, maybe meeting a stranger a 1am isn’t the best idea ever. Heh.

It wasn’t terrible though. A little awkward but not the most awkward meeting I’ve ever had. To my surprise, he’s better looking in person. I don’t think he photographs well. He has an adorable dog and he knows when to laugh at my jokes. I had a decent time, which is more than I can say for 90% of the times I’ve met a guy in person after talking online.

I think I slightly prefer the way we communicate online, but there’s at least something worth exploring here.

We ended with a hug that I, strangely, found myself holding onto longer than he did.

We departed on a high note but I wanted to send him a quick message before he headed to bed and I headed to the Internetland. He mentioned that it was well worth it to stay up late enough to cross paths with me, and I feel quite flattered. He’s really such a kind and good person, which is a relief and would probably make for an awesome friendship if nothing else.

But aside from that, I’m glad to have finally met someone again. It’s been years since I’ve done that. I went on so many terrible first dates/meetings. I didn’t want to go on any more. And the longer it had been, the scarier the idea had become.

So, yea, I met a guy.

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Loveo Nox

December 2nd, 2015

Now that I’ve given more than one sound-controlled vibrator a try, I feel pretty confident comparing how they work and, more than that, whether or not they’re even a thing we need to have at all. Unfortunately for companies like Lelo and Loveo, the answer to the latter question is an unequivocal “No.”

Let’s start with Loveo’s shape, a slightly-curved shaft intended for G-spot stimulation. The head isn’t as flat or narrow as some G-spotters. It definitely is rounded and wider than some toys. The gradual taper feels more filling than some G-spot toys, but I can see why is would be a poor fit if you need an extreme angle for adequate G-spotting.

This is all covered in silky smooth silicone that could be primed with some lube but doesn’t have nearly as much drag as a Fun Factory toy, for instance. Aside from the plastic buttons, it’s covered in this somewhat-squishy layer of silicone that’s much softer than a Lelo toy.

It’s also waterproof thanks to the charging ports that’s similar to many toys on the market. You’ll need to wiggle the adapter into the port just right. I’ve had more problems with this type of port than I care to admit. I don’t know if it’s just me, though.

I’m not thrilled with the appearance, either. It’s not that it’s pink. Enough of my fellow bloggers have made public their annoyance with a certain shade befit only for Barbie. But the silver, plastic panel appears cheap. And the shape of the buttons offers no redemption; although, they do offer a nice tactile feedback when in use. It’s just the whole design reminds me of Maia Toys, too pink, too little, too late, yet not enough to stand out in any recognizable way.

Next come the buttons, 2 of which switch between modes and 2 that adjust strength of vibrations. You must first turn it on by holding the + button (holding the – turns it off) then press either the H to turn on sound activation or M button to use regular vibrators.

When you’re in steady vibes, pressing the M quickly cycles through escalation, pulsaton, a combination mode, mixed length pulses and back to steady vibrations. Interestingly, there’s a mode through the cycle that does nothing at all, which is just a wasted button push in my opinion.

The vibrations are on the buzzy side of moderate, especially when you turn up the strength, and there are only three levels of them when on the constant vibration mode. They’re enough to make me squirt but not the type that would get me off clitorally.

If you’ve used Siri 2, then you know what to expect from Loveo Nox. There’s a slight delay when making noise. You can imitate a pulse once you get used to it, but it’s much harder to achieve escalation. For steady vibrations, you would need constant noise. I find using my breath works especially well.

Music is a toss up as it’ll vibrate constantly if it’s too close to the source or the music is too loud. But the microphone in this toy, which is located in the handle, seems more responsive than that of Siri 2. There’s about a 6-inch range before the toy cuts out.

It’s undeniable that the sound-responsive function in these toys is useless as a solo endeavor. Short of screaming yourself hoarse or blaring music, both of which would likely get the cops called on you, it’s nearly impossible to create loud enough ambient noise. One could arguably masturbate closer to a source of sound, perhaps a laptop or seated in front of a desk, but that’s not my style. And it’s still a big “if.”

I think that about sums up my opinion on “innovative” “features” of sex toys. If I have to completely change my masturbation habits in a way that’s distracting, this feature is really a liability. I would even give companies some slack considering my unusual need for pressure and general ability to get off within single-digit minutes, but the Loveo Nox is one that seems just as trying for most users.

With that said, it might be more useful during partner play, when your partner is able to breathe, moan or otherwise make noise into the microphone but this still requires your partner to adapt to the toy and not the other way around. I can’t see how this bodes well.

With many toys that are “new” or “improved,” I find myself trying to sell it on virtues of being a decent albeit unremarkable toy when you fall back on standard functions, but Loveo has included a motor that’s generally forgettable. This is especially true when compared with vibrators that have dual motors or especially deep vibrations.

I always feel bad when writing a review that’s negative, but I would feel worse leading my readers astray. If you’re looking for something better, the Loveo Nox isn’t it. It’s different, but that’s certainly not a selling point in this case.

There are plenty of attractive toys, toys that stimulate the G-spot with a similar amount of girth, vibrators made of silicone and those that offer deep vibrations that would be a better investment than this one.

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Black Friday Sex Toy, Lingerie and BDSM Gear Sales

November 27th, 2015

I hope you all had an awesome Thanksgiving. It’s 4:30 in the morning, and I’ve yet to go to sleep. Today has been a long day with little sleep, but before I tuck in to dream of pumpkin pies and sugar plum fairies, I wanted to let my readers know about the deals that can be snagged on awesome sex toys this Black Friday.

Lelo

The folks at Lelo have a special code for my readers, which will get you 20% off the already discounted Black Friday rate and free shipping. Just use SexandLove. I would use this for the Ora. The Ora 2 is even better. Read my review.

You can get it for less than $150. Luna Beads are under $45, Siri 2 will run you just $119 and Mona 2 $126.68.


When you buy a Womanizer vibrator from Babeland, you can get a free Babeland shot glass. To be honest, I don’t care much about the vibrator — check out a fellow blogger’s review — but that shot glass is awesome!

There’s also this sale on We-Vibe toys for couples.

We-Vibe Sex Toys

And you can get 25% off Fun Factory vibes just like Stockroom.

Adam & Eve

The sale from Adam & Eve is much better than their typical 25% off coupon. 35% Off Your Order + Free Shipping with Code: BFRI35 at Adam & Eve! Valid 11/27-11/29. Today only, you can BOGO 50% off select toys, too. Use code BOGO50.

Remember that coupons don’t apply to every toy. Items in your cart that can’t be used with a coupon will have a notice.

 

Stockroom.com

Stockroom has awesome BDSM gear as well as some quality sex toys. Fun Factory brand toys specifically are 25% off, and you guys know how much I love them (if not, check out my review for Laya spot, Boss vibrator and the Stronic Eins to name a few)! Below are a few of the items and their sale prices.

Most of these prices are just about the same as Babeland’s sale, but the G5 Tiger is $8 cheaper at Stockroom.

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Don’t forget the rest of their Black Friday items on sale!
UberKinky
UberKinky is where you wanna go if you’re from the UK. You’ll save a ton of money on shipping. Save 20% with code BLACKFRIDAY. Spend over L75 and get a free pinwheel (what’s that? Read about it here). I especially recommend the Rounded Handle Leather Flogger for only $32 (review here)!
Frederick’s
If you like this brand of lingerie, there’s a couple sales to check out.

Lovehoney

I’ve been a fan of most of the Lovehoney lingerie I’ve tried, and you can get 3 pairs of panties for $22.

3 for $22 Flirty Knickers

There are so freaking many deals available today, though. Check out this page for all of them. You can get lingerie for just $5, bondage gear for $4, a deluxe toy case with rabbit vibe for $60, free lube with Fun Factory vibes or Fleshlights and a. bondage kit with We-Vibe purchase.

Check out similar sales on Lovehoney’s UK site.

Good Vibes

Good Vibes is offering 25% off everything on the site all weekend long with the exception o We-Vibe & Spareparts products, which will be on sale for 20% off. Here’s a sampling of what you can scores.

Plus, you can check out their gift guide below for more ideas.

Shevibe

Save a percentage off your order depending upon how much you spend. Ends November 30th. This is one of the few places where you can get the stone dildo by Laid, which I loved, for less than $90 + free shipping. $103.99 will also get a Fucking Sculpture in your hand!

ELF-500X373

I think that about covers it. Hope y’all had a good Thanksgiving if you celebrate. Either way, gotta love these sales!

Finally, save $5 off $25 orders at the Of Sex and Love store with code BF5OFF25.

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