Things That Ensure I’ll Ignore Your Online Dating Profile

January 19th, 2015

Maybe I’m too picky. Maybe I shouldn’t judge a book by its cover. Maybe I should understand how hard it is to write a dating profile. After all, I’ve redone mine multiples times. It might help for me to give people a chance even if there’s no immediate spark. It is the Internet, after all. I might find some diamonds in the rough. Or something.

But I don’t. Maybe I can’t. I go running when people post photos full of fish. And I certainly don’t respond to messages that do any of the following:

  • Consist only of a compliment of how I am a “beautiful woman.”
  • Use pet names.
  • Imply that I need someone to take care of me in any way
  • Enforce gender roles in an ignorant way (see above) or conflict with my feminist ideals
  • Aren’t accompanied by at least one photo
  • Come from someone who spends more time working out than sleeping every day
  • Are copied and pasted
  • Contain a single word, especially if it’s spelled incorrectly
  • Use too many emoticons

I feel like I’m getting dangerously close to Seinfeld territory here, but I’m also not obsessed with the idea of finding or being with someone, either. I’m pretty awesome riding solo, and someone would have to be pretty fantastic to make me reconsider.

And the thing is? someone who I have amazing chemistry with will make me forget all these silly rules.


The Big Book of Submission: 69 Kinky Tales

January 3rd, 2015

There’s something to be said for a good book that you can’t put down after a story/chapter or two. That’s the case with the Big Book of Submission.  I would intend to read a dozen pages, and I would finally put it down some 60 or 70 pages later. I was thoroughly enthralled and aroused, but this typically meant it took time away from sleeping or working or what-else-have-you that I should have been doing.

This meant that it took only a few sittings to get through this book, which boasts an impressive 69 stories. But because I knew I couldn’t put it down, I stretched them out for when I had time to read that much.

The Big Book of Submission is wonderful in terms of variety. There are (ignoring D/s), m/m, m/f and f/f roles. There’s a few trans stories to be found and all sorts of ambiguity around gender and gender roles. In short, it’s not heteronormative. But I think this big tome really goes one step further than that. I was really impressed at how The Big Book of Submission deal with the roles of top/dom and bottom/sub in regards to traditonal gender (roles). Not every man is the dom, nor is every butch. And through the words of the characters — almost, if not all of the stories are written in first person — we understand the implications and the intimacy of turning those roles in their heads.

Aside from variety in roles, there’s a variety in content and even in how most of the characters experience submission. For example, at least two stories dealt with a masochistic dominant and how their sub obeyed by providing sensation. The editor, Rachel Kramer Bussel, contributed one of those particular tales, entitled “Reverse Psychology.”

With 69 stories, you might think that some of them would be a little redundant, but I didn’t find this to be the case at all, even though there’s obviously similarly to the feelings that submissive feel when serving, obeying or worshiping their dominants. Each of them experiences their submission, scene and relationship in a unique way. There’s brand-new experiences, established relationships, breaking of limits and twists and turns that were crafted masterfully.

The writing in this BDSM anthology was pretty top-notch. All the authors were great at capturing the feelings evoked during a scene or in a BDSM relationship, along with the imagery that goes with it. Themes of trust and sometimes fear, hesitation and excitement, growth and pushing the boundaries are touched on time and again in this anthology. Although I am more able to identify some submissiveness in myself, this book might have the most hardened dom consider submitting a time or two!

Was there anything that I didn’t like? Sure, some stories are more forgettable. One in particular involved feet fetish, and that’s reaaalllly not my thing, so once it got to that part, I skipped to the next story. But I enjoyed more than I didn’t.

I especially enjoyed “The Problem Is, I’m a Bitch”, in which Corrine Arundo writes as a stubborn submissive who mocks a “cartoonishly” dress domme.  “Teddy Bare,” is a sexy yet sweet story about two men who wait until their first night of marriage to have sex and how they incorporate power play into their relationship. Another particularly touching story revolves around a submissive whose once-beautiful body had succumbed to illness and surgery and how her dominant helps remind her of her beauty through a public scene. Teresa Roberts penned “Beautiful,” which is one of the stories that truly stands out for me.

The one stand out story was one that managed to be both surprising, sentimental and sexy.  It’s another story by Corrin Arundo, whose work I obviously need to become more familiar with, entitled “Unanchored.” It was thoroughly titillating, like many of the other stories, but it struck an emotional chord with its solemn and sad ending that left me, quite literally, sobbing and perhaps even decimated. There is no snippet that can do the beauty of this story justice.

Just like there is no single story in this erotica collection that sums up the experience that is The Big Book of Submission. You need to dive in and read it all. Perhaps not in order, but there’s no single way to describe the experience.

A sincerely “Thank you!” to Cleis Press, the company that pretty much made my year, for the opportunity to review this book!



Dear Carla Alcorn

December 30th, 2014

Last night, I read about how your trans daughter killed herself. Then, I read any number of incorrect articles about how your “son,” your words and the media’s, accidentally died while taking a walk. Make no mistake, it was no accident. More correctly, it was suicide, but I am many who think that you and your husband had a direct influence on your daughter’s death.

I am sure this is a difficult time for you, whether or not you subscribe to the truth. But consider this.

Your daughter’s entire life was difficult for her.

She admits to spending a decade — 10 long years — uncomfortable in her own body. In her blog, she talks about feeling awash with relief upon discovering out what it means to be trans. She rushed to you, wanting to share in an intimate and vulnerable moment, and you shut her down. You told her that she was confused and going through a phase. You told her to consider your feelings and your social standing while never considering her own feelings, feelings that were surely tumultuous and more difficult than anything you, as a white, Christian, cisgendered woman have ever experience.

You tried to force her to abandon her true self. But I knew better. She knew better. Humans just can’t do that. You tried to force her to keep her wings still, and when she tried to fly, you clipped them. You cut her off from her freedom, her friends and any sort of social connection.

Why? Because you don’t understand? Or because you were afraid of how it would make your family look?

Carla, let me tell you how you look now.

You look hateful and spiteful. You look shallow. You look like a bad parent. You look, to some, like a fucking murderer. You look like a monster.

You look like someone whose denial is so strong that she’s painfully close to insanity.

You look like part of the problem, a problem that your daughter wrote and cried about in depth. A problem that ultimately took her life.

It is easy enough for me to forget that trans and homophobia exist with so many happy and smiling trans faces, but it’s dangerous to do so when those opinions still exist and they’re still killing people like Leelah.

I have no hope that you would ever see this, Carla. You’re probably hiding out because many people have attacked you after you continued to spew ignorance and hate after your daughter’s suicide. I know I should be a better person, but I cannot help but think this is karmic retribution for the way you attacked your daughter during her life and the way you’re somehow still managing to attack her in her death.

I couldn’t begin to understand how your daughter felt, Carla, but I can imagine how I would respond in your position in a parent. Hint: you failed your daughter.

I am privileged in many ways, with my skin color and sexual orientation and able body. In fact, we are privileged in the same ways as far as I know. Yet you drove your daughter to suicide and I will stand up for her rights, even in her death.

So, Mrs Alcorn, I apologize for your loss. It will hurt no matter how you look at it. But your pain is nothing like the pain you caused your daughter, and all of this could have been avoided if you were a better person. I have no doubt you will come to this realization. Perhaps on your death bed. Perhaps some night as you lie awake, tossing and turning, in your own comfortable bed.

And when you do, Carla Alcorn, I hope you pick up the torch your daughter has lit, cease your involvement as part of the problem and help to make the world a place where people like Leelah will want to live. After all, you owe Leelah her life.


2014: The Best Of

December 29th, 2014

Another year. Another couple dozen reviews of sex toys. There were fewer this year than the last. This might be due to me having more sex. Or perhaps there were fewer toys that I really loved.

In fact, while populating this list, I worried I wouldn’t have enough best-ofs. I suppose that’s bound to happen, and I might accept the blame of trying out some toys that wouldn’t work well for me if I had looked past the shiny and read the small print. Oops.

But, there’s definitely some toys I would recommend, so here they are!


Svakom is an up-and-coming company. I had a hit-or-miss relationship with the toys they send to review, but Leslie is a self-heating vibrator with respectable power output.

Minna’s Limon took me quite by surprise, quickly becoming one of the most intuitve vibrators I’ve ever used.

I also quite like Ora 2, but it’s the stuff it does besides vibrating that does it for me.

ceramix 5 and 6

Ceramix 5 (right) left a surprising impression


2014 was light on dildos. I only tried a couple, and both of those were from Pipedream’s Ceramix line. Ultimately, I preferred #5!


Move over 50 Shades of Grey. Wrapped Around Your Finger is actually a book worth reading, and there are more in the series!

Sexual Non-Fiction

I’m technically a year behind and I didn’t even write a review for Best Sex Writing 2012 (I did write a review for the next year’s). But I think it might be the best in the series and you’re missing out if you don’t check it out.


The Bettie Page Spanking Paddle is manufacturer by Lovehoney and full of the details you’d want while offering a sexy spanking.


Designed Intimates sent me quite a lot of lingerie to review. I especially enjoyed the Charming chemise and thong.

Bath and Body Product

SheVibe let me try the Flirty Little Secret Pink Caviar Scrub With Pheromones. It’s slippery but smells great and works well. It’s been a nice addition to my shower routine!


Lovehoney is rocking 2014’s list. They also made the Deluxe Sex Toy Case, which is probably my all-time favorite option for sex toy storage!

As always, I recommend the best toys from years past. Check out my list of 5-star sex toys!

Don’t forget to let us know about what you loved in the comments.

Have a good new year. I plan to!


$100 Designer Intimates Giveaway

December 23rd, 2014

Designer Intimates was kind enough to send me more than a few items to review, and they’ve also offered to sponsor a giveaway for $100 credit to the store. That’s right, one of you Of Sex and Love readers will have enough to get a few bras, panties, chemises or whatever else your little heart desires. They’ve recently begun to carry leggings and tank tops, so you can comfortably lounge around the house, too.

This is a great Christmas gift for you, or you could buy your partner some awesome things and save them for a birthday or Valentine’s Day, which isn’t even that far away now!

Adore Bra and Vanessa Thong

Adore Bra and Vanessa Thong

Designer Intimates has an awesome sale going on right now, where you can save up to 60% on some items. I’ll try to keep my readers updated about other sales, too!

The store sells items from designer brands, including Felina and Jezebel, among others. There’s a ton of matching items, but you can certainly mix and match. If you read my review of Designer Intimates, then you know some of my favorite items:

But shopping will be plenty of fun for you and perhaps your partner, so I don’t want to take that fun away from you! Designer Intimates recently relaunched their site, so it’s easier to shop than ever.

Use the Gleam form below to enter:

$100 Designer Intimates Credit

Good luck!

Come back daily for more entries!

Ends January 20th.

I was compensated for this review and giveaway in the form of product. All opinions are mine. I will earn a small commission if you make purchases after clicking the links in this post. Thanks for supporting me!


A Brand Spanking New Idea

December 22nd, 2014

Spank my pussy

“What?” my request seems to pull him into the present. “Why?” He seems to consider.

“Because it will feel good”

He seems unsure but reaches out and playfully pats my lower lips.

“Like this?”

But that’s not at all like what I want.


Another slap. does less terrible count as good? I don’t think so. I didn’t my head”no.” It seems to make him think I’m challenging him on purpose but I’m I. He reaches out and suddenly smacks my cunt with a resounding and rewarding “thwack.”

He can’t even open his cocky mouth to ask if that’s what I want before I’m yelling “yes.” I know he was trying to prove a point but that’s exactly how I like it. He likes it too, I can tell.

“I see.” He seems to be processing the data. I can almost see the gears in good brain moving. He comes to the right decision when he decides to kneel between my legs and spank my pussy again.

And again.

And again.

Again and again.

Once more for good measure.

My pussy lips sting and I’m sure they’re red to look at, but it’s not just the external parts that have responded to his smacks. He slips his fingers inside me. First two, then three. We usually don’t do any more than that but then he pushes in another. It feels like there’s room for all of him inside of me I’m so wet.  He murmurs appreciatively at this, his fingers inside me working at my g-spot as he mirrors the movement with his thumb on my clit. It seems like it doesn’t take any time at all before I’m coming.

This becomes a regular thing and not just during sex. Whenever I can, I wear a skirt and he pushes it up around my hips. His fingers push my panties — if I’m wearing any — to the side side and he spanks my pussy. Sometimes he readjusts my panties and skirt and we go on about our lives.

Other times, he bends me over the nearest piece of furniture — the back of a love seat, a railing, a desk . And with my skirt hiked up over my hips, I spread my legs and he answers me from behind, thrusting deep into my cunt, which is wet from him spanking me. Neither of us seems to last long. Whether it’s from the spanking or the fact that we’re usually in a public place I don’t know. But we fuck our way to our impending orgasms before pulling my skirt back down around my thighs and I’m walking away like nothing happened.

It was his idea that we let someone else watcher but I wasn’t opposed. The more I thought about it, the hotter it sounded. So you put out an ad on Craigslist and waited for the right person to reply. I wasn’t positive if this was the best way to go about it, so I was surprised one day when we had not one but two responses that seemed realistic.

One was a woman, and aspiring dominant, who just wanted to see a little power play in person. She said she wanted to dress up the way she thought her future clients would enjoy and relax while she watch my partner spank my pussy. She didn’t even wanna join in, and it didn’t sound like it was going to arouse her but maybe that’s just what we needed our first time.

The other was a middle-aged man who made no secret of how erotic he found the entire situation. He wanted to watch and would it be too much to ask if he also jerked off. Since we were putting on a show in there would be no touching, we didn’t see anything wrong with it. We said yes to them both.

We invited her over one afternoon. She arrived in a modest sedan. She was clad head to foot in a mixture of black leather and PVC. At first I asked myself if this was real. Did people really dressed like that? But here she was.

I made nervous small talk as I ushered her into our home. She sounded less confident than she looked, but she followed me making polite comments about our decor. We stopped in the living room and I perched on the sofa. My partner entered with three glasses of wine, and I took one but she declined. She informed us that we could proceed whenever we wanted. I sipped at my wine to take the edge off, but I decided that it wasn’t going to get any less awkward.

I reach for my lover’s hands pulling him closer to me. As I lay back on the sofa, I pulled him down on top of me. We quickly kissed before he moved his way down my body, pulling my shorts and panties with him. By then his hands had gotten used to spreading my legs in preparation for the spanking. My body must have gotten used to this too because I could already feel myself getting wet.

He caressed the palm of his hand against my vulva and come to my clit in an attempt to calm me. I breathed deeply through my nose through my nose to allow the tension to leave my body. As I did this, the first smack landed on my skin. I squealed even that was much lighter than I was accustomed to. With her eyes on us, everything seemed to feel more intense.

I saw her try not to flinch. I regained my composure when he hit me the second time and managed nothing but a small smile. She seem to follow my lead, sitting upright in our overstuffed armchair with her legs crossed in front of her. His eyes never strayed from me. He kept glancing between my face and my pussy. I could tell that he wanted to make sure it was still okay with this and that he would stop it at any moment if I indicated otherwise but I wanted to continue.

What followed was a barrage of smacks, landing at different angles and intensities. He changed his method more than he typically did so I wouldn’t tired before we provided our strange guest with a satisfying show. I found the inconsistency arousing and could feel myself getting wetter. He would pause to rub my vulva,  and subtle eye contact revealed that he was well aware of my level of arousal. But like so many times before, it wasn’t going to go any further.

He finished the session with the series of loud and rapid spanks. Some of them even seem to echo off the walls and push my body away from him. I couldn’t help but gasp and moan. Our guest widened  her eyes at this approach. I don’t think she had anticipated that my lover was going to end with such a grand finale. When he finally stopped, I could tell from the heat between my legs that my pussy was glowing red. I knew I wasn’t going to put on another pair of panties until the next morning at the very least.

My partner stood up, slowly making eye contact with the stranger in our living room. He smiled and motioned at me.

“As you can see, she’s has quite enough.”

“Yes, I agree,” the woman replied as they both moved out of the room. I stayed where I was, forcing my heavy breathing to normalize. I heard the front door close in the other room and then his footsteps for coming back to me.

“Well, darling, how was that?” he asked if he approached me.

“It was different.” I was still processing. “But not bad.”

“Good,”he replied, One hand one his belt. Je quickly and did the button and drop those jeans around his feet. As he did this, his cock spring free. It was hard and already a drop of precum glistened on the head. I hadn’t closed my legs and he took advantage of that to enter me. He was on top of me in one swift movement.

My labia burned, and with every thrust his day -ld stubble felt like a million pins digging into my skin. But as much as it hurt, I felt twice as good. We had barely gotten settled before my arousal grew into an orgasm. Ais my muscles contracted around his cock, he couldn’t stop from coming either. We collapsed in a sweaty pile on our sofa.

With the first try a relative success, we decided to invite the man we met on Craigslist to our home. The more my mind played over the events with the reserved woman, the more it seemed liked something that I liked. And while I realized that, the man wanted to do a bit more, I felt bold enough to invite him into our private lives.

His eager replies plainly painted a picture of his voyeuristic tendencies. It was obviously too late for my partner and I to claim that we weren’t exhibitionists, but the woman we had met on our first encounter had been so passive that it almost hadn’t felt like we were putting on a show. I couldn’t help but wondered if she had judged me, my partner or us as a couple, but I had know idea. Either way, I felt as though I had to put on a show for the second go around.

I expressed a hesitant sort of excitement to my partner, who was quick to allay any lingering fears I might have. He was certain the second time would be even better than the first. So with a little trepidation and a little more alcohol in my system, we invited another stranger into our home.

While the fledgling domme might have been memorable due to her stereotypical garb, this man was entirely forgettable. He was like the sort of man who walks around in the background on TV shows: nondescript. He seemed the sort of polo-wearing IT professional that I’d have chatted with at work when my computer went down. In short, he was not intimidating.

He also wasn’t arousing. His presence in our home didn’t do anything for me. So as my partner helped me shimmy out of my skirt and panties, my lips weren’t swollen and glistening with my arousal. Nor did my nipples show any sign of excitement as he pushed the cups of my bra beneath my breasts.

My partner, observant and loving, seemed to notice this when his first few blows seemed to catch me off guard. My body remained tense, the impact uncomfortable. As I prepared for another, my lover shocked me by instead grabbing my ass and pulling my hips forward so that my clit met his mouth. His practised tongue sliding along the side of my clit that always seemed to be more sensitive. I sighed and pushed my hips toward him, a sign that he correctly took for my finally being in the right head space.

As quickly as his oral attentions had begun, he pulled away and begun raining blows upon my cunt. His hand seem to hit the mark every time, sometimes making contact with his soft but strong palm. At other times, I could feel his knuckles against my clit and vulva, making sore the spots that had received the most contact.

I was thoroughly enraptured, my gaze intent upon his face as he administered his craft when I heard the jingle of the stranger’s pants. I had forgotten all about him, when I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye. As he rested in a chair, he’d unbuttoned and unzips his khakis to reveal a hardon that was anything but forgettable. It was suddenly apparently where all the focus had gone during the creation of this man. His thick shaft and the perfectly contoured corona held my gaze for longer than I would have thought when he first walked into my living room.

As the man’s hand wrapped around his dick, my partner drew my attention back to him with a smack across the side of my face. My cheek stung, and I could suddenly smell the musk of myself so close to my nose.

“So you want a cock, do you?” His voice sounded stern, but I could see the glimmer in his eye.

Just like that first time he had spanked me, he was ready to take me, quickly pulling his belt free from its confines.  Hiis jeans dropped to the ground around his ankles and his cock straining against perfectly-fitted boxer briefs. This hadn’t been part of the plan at all, but I couldn’t bring myself to say “No.”

Instead, I just nodded, and he knelt in front of the couch, pulling my legs around his hips so the tip of his cock could glide into my pussy. I bent my knees to hold him between my legs as tightly as possible. My nipples stood erect now, and somewhere in my periphery the stranger panted heavily as he worked his own cock.

My partner’s cock was buried in my cunt, slick with my juices and fitting perfectly like it always seemed to. While I was used to measured thrusts that would typically enable my partner to last longer, his own desire resulted in fervent strokes. His hips seemed to be moving quicker than my eyes could follow, but I could feel every time his hips pressed into mine and my labia burned after my spankings.  I had underestimated just how arousing this situation might be for him.

I imagined that the stranger’s eyes were glazed over just like those of my lover’s as he gaze somewhere over my shoulder. A few minutes of thrusting, and he was ready to come. But he hadn’t forgotten why we were here after all. Before he let himself be overtaken by a powerful orgasm, he reached out to slap my clit. I yelped, shocked, then moaned as this sudden smack brought on my own orgasm.

It was quick and shallow, but it was enough. My partner’s own orgasm seemed to burst from him, sapping him of strength as he collapse onto me. A jagged moan from across the room reminded us that we weren’t alone. This new stranger — as if you can call a man who has jerked off while watching you fuck a stranger! — had also come. His seed stained the front of his pants and dripped down his knuckles.

I managed to direct him to the bathroom sink. He nodded graciously before disappearing into the hallway. My partner lifted himself from me, and I pulled myself from the sofa, which I had almost seemed to become a part of. As he pulled his pants up, I grasped for my own clothes that were strewn upon the cushions.

His familiar smile was too much. I smiled back, feeling a warmth overcome my body and almost forgetting the burning of my pussy due to his spankings.

At that moment, the stranger reemerged, making his way toward the front door. He paused and turned to us, struggling for words.

“Thank you. That was,” an awkward pause, “something else.”

My lover nodded in the man’s direction. I remained motionless, unsure of the decorum that would be more appropriate in the situation. The stranger exited our home, quietly closing the door behind him. But I had a feeling that many more would use that door in the days to come.


Penthouse Variations on Oral

December 18th, 2014

One of the newest books from Cleis Press, which has made me a very happy reviewer and reader this year, is “Penthouse Variations on Oral.” Oral sex is one of my favorites, which I’m sure can be said for many of you readers. Giving and receiving are both fun, and this collection of stories will hopefully provide a look into book.

The description is as follows

Mind-blowing oral sex can be the epitome of pleasure itself. Curated by the editors of the wildly popular Penthouse Variationsmagazine, this voracious volume goes deep into the throes of oral delight. Both new and well-known erotic writers satisfy the hungriest mouths while dishing up an array of below-the-belt feasts. In this collection of short stories, lovers explore the delicious ways oral sex can be an act of affection and tenderness, a testament to devotion, or an expression of pure, hot lust. Going down is an experience meant to be savored…and shared.

Alison Tyler, erotica editor and writer extraordinaire, is just one of the authors who you’ll read in this book. Her story, among others, might remind you of your own exploits or inspire you to try something new.

I tell you about all of this because I’ve been given the opportunity to give one of you a chance to win a copy of this book to add to your shelf or nightstand.

Enter using the widget below.

Good luck!

Penthouse Variations on Oral

Open to US.

Giveaway ends December 31.

1 Comment

Lelo Ora 2

December 18th, 2014

Ora 2
$159 from SheVibe

Let me just start with this “Fuck the haters.”

Seriously. Fuck the haters.

Lelo’s Ora “oral sex simulators” won’t work for everyone. But I like it. And I think some of you will, too. So II’m going to write a review heralding the positives because someone has to do it. And I, brave sex toy review readers, am that someone.

I don’t want to sing blind praises. There is some fair criticism of Ora 2 and what Lelo has been doing lately.

Yes, it’s dumb for the second version of a toy to come out less than a year after the original. Lelo should have tested more and come out with this instead of the original Ora, which I felt lukewarm about at best. It may very well be that Lelo is focusing on quantity over quality lately, but I liked few toys of theirs even when they took longer to release them. The ratio seems about the same. So whatever.

No, I don’t think that hole in the design is awesome. It barely fits two fingers, and even then, they’re not in a position for the rest of my hand to operate the toy or apply pressure the way I like. And this silly plastic ring is like a magnet for the kind of shit that you should only see in a petri dish, I am sure.

Yes, Lelo’s packaging is only impressive the first half dozen times around. It’s almost completely useless after I take a toy out of the box, and I’m sick of ripping the damned foam innards to shreds just to recycle it.

And, no, Lelo didn’t know what they were doing with that stupid banker toy. Like, what the fuck, guys?

But Ora 2 is an improvement over the original, whether that original was tested enough or not. While the original was a good idea and an improvement toys like Sasi, which had already attempted to simulate oral sex for a woman (and a toy that I liked.. while it worked), it wasn’t good enough in real life that I could recommend it, especially at its high price tag.

Lelo has changed very little with the Ora 2. Size and shape are essential identical. They’re probably using the same molds for many of the parts. But the company has increase the size of the rolling ball that provides the clitoral stimulation and made it protrude more, which equals greater and most consistent contact.

And I like it. It feels closest to receiving oral than and other toy. It makes me feel a little less shitty about boys who break my heart and being single and fuck-less. Because, hey, this feels pretty good. At least I have this.

There’s another change that I find to be an improvement, and that’s Lelo’s SenseTouch technology. After pressing the button to active it for 5 seconds, the toy will respond to how hard you press it against your skin. It’s really sensitive, which is a boon. You can barely brush your skin, and it turns on. If you’re like me and you enjoy grinding against things, this will crank it up to maximum. If you have the right body type, you could hold this in between your thighs for hands-free stimulation; although, you won’t get precise control this way.

I guess this was a feature of the Smart Wand, and I didn’t notice. Oops. But it makes much more sense with how I use Ora.  The general design of the mobile ball and how it’s situated within this vibrator also work for pressure and grinding, which are my favorite parts of oral, by the way. It creates a little platform against my vulva, and I can grind until I’m panting and cumming and covered in sweat.

Maybe that’s not for you, though. If you want to use a separate toy internally at the same time, you’ll probably find Ora to be bulky. Indeed, the shape could be improved. Like I mentioned, the hole doesn’t make sense functionally. It’s more about form. My hands still wind up cramping because of this. Bummer.

The vibrators that go with Ora 2 aren’t anything like the Hitachi, but considering the source, they’re fairly deep and strong enough. Acceptable. Better than the Smart Wand with its gigantic size.

I am worried that the battery life is a little low. Because I like Ora 2 so much, I’ve been using it for around the full hour per session, which means I’m going to have to charge it every time. Get on that, Lelo.

And I’d like the track the ball moves on to be smaller and tighter. I’d get more direct clitoral stimulation while holding Ora 2 in place if this was the case.

Really, though, the improvements that Lelo has focused on make a serious difference. Perhaps the Ora 3 will be perfect, if Lelo ever makes it. For now, I’m happy enough for Ora 2, and I seriously recommend you give it a shot if..

  • You liked Ora but would have liked some of these improvements
  • You enjoy oral sex
  • Pressure and grinding are important to your masturbation style

Maybe you’ll want to wait for a sale, because $160 – $180 is certainly a lot for a toy that you may not love. You can get a free $15 SheVibe gift card if you purchase $125 right now, however.


Designer Intimates Lingerie Review

December 16th, 2014

Let me start this with a huge “Thank you” to the folks from Designer Intimates, who offered me a ton of stuff to review and an opportunity to host this giveaway. And they were super patient while I caught up with my other reviews.

If you follow me on Twitter, you’ve seen the photo of my haul, which includes bras, panties and a sexy chemise. Designer Intimates sells lingerie from a few designer brands, including Jezebel and Felina, among others. They have an impressive collection but not one so large that you’ll get lost in it.

Charming Chemise and Thong

Let’s start with the Charming Chemise, which I am currently wearing. I love love love this piece and the matching thong. I’m so excited that my favorite piece was the one I wanted the most. It’s available from sizes small to XL, and I asked for the XL in Crushed Berries. This is a medium pink color.

Super comfy Charming Chemise

Super comfy Charming Chemise

There isn’t anything I don’t love about this. It stretches perfectly over all my curves.I recently moved to a 40 bra band, and this is comfortable, but there’s a little room for stretch. On my 5’2″ frame, the hem hits about mid-thigh. It’ll obviously be shorter on you taller ladies, but I don’t think that would be a problem!

It’s comfortable enough to sleep in or lounge around in all day like I am. The lace on the cups is feminine and flirty — and reminds me quite a bit of the Lace Appeal Chemise with smaller lace — but there’s a layer of fine mesh beneath this which is both comfortable and provides some modesty.

The lace straps are wide, and it feels like they offer more support, and there’s some adjustability to the elastic bra-style straps in back. They fit well on my C/D cups, but I think you could go up a cup size comfortably. The material is silky soft but doesn’t snag on nails and other items.  Quality of this chemise is impressive. I’ve worn it to sleep and it’s fared amazingly.  If I had any complaint about this item, is that the material can get a bit cool so I wouldn’t wear it below freezing. But I also don’t like to turn on my heat. LOL!

There is both a matching thong and hipster to go with this chemise, so you can choose either or both. I received the thong in size large, which is made of the same pretty pink material that’s comfortable as hell. In the photos, the stretchy lace sides of the thong look pretty narrow. They’re not exactly thick, but the thinner they are is about an inch, so I don’t think they cut into my hips, about 40 inches, in a terrible way. The lace on the back of the thong is cute, and the way it sits with the lace “pointing” downward is lovely. You can easily, and I have, wear it all day long. The way these pieces go together is perfect for a single night, however.

Madison and Camille Panties

I received a couple of pieces not in a collection. For example, the Madison Bikini in a medium blue. It’s a similar soft material to the Daphne panty. It slides over my hips well, but because it’s a high-cut bikini, it’s cut a little more modestly/long on my frame even though I got the medium, so it’s not good with lower cut bottoms. It’s still hella comfortable and the lace and ribbon detail are great. Again, this one seems to be awesome quality. The blue is no longer available from Designer Intimates, but you can check out the five other colors.

The Camille Cheeky Panty offers a more modern cut; although, it’s not a thong. With shade stripes in front and silky mesh in back, it shows off everything. The size large is actually cut a bit narrower than the medium Madison bikini, so it fits me better. It’s comfortable enough for every day wear, and my black panty goes well with any black bra. There is a vertical seam running down the back, but I love it beside that thanks to it’s durability and comfort.

Daphne Bra and Hipster

Daphne Bra and Hipster

Daphne Bra and Hipster

Felina’s Daphne Collection Contour Bra and hipster was the second set I received. I loved the feel of the stretchy material out of the box, and the black lace laid over the white looks fantastic. There’s a black lace version, but it’s kinda “meh.” I think the hipster would be especially good under form-fitting clothing as it wouldn’t show many lines. There’s the obvious issues of keeping the white pristine, but with some care you could do it.

However, the bra seemed to run a little small to me in a 38C (this was part of the reason I decided to , or perhaps I am gaining more curves. Either way, I didn’t want to add the panties to my collection since they’re so nice together, so I’m passing them online to my bestie.

Both the bra and hipster are a more modest cut. The bra is contoured with underwire but only lightly lined, so it’ll have minimal lift and shaping. There is a layer of fine mesh that sits inside the band, so I bet this would be comfortable for all-day wear. If you’re into full coverage with less padding and you take the snugness into consideration, this would be a real winner.

Jezebel Intrigue Bra

Designer Intimates no longer sells this bra , but you can find it from other retailers if you’re interested. The design reminds me of a VS bra I had some years ago. I liked that it was padded and had lace, and it fit (also 38C)  the best of all the bras I was sent to review. However, I do not love it. The “double pushup” bra has a lot of dense padding that’s more bulky and constricting than supporting and shaping. The type of foam really matters, as I’m sure you know.

The pink lace overlay is nice, as is the connected loops between the cups, which has come back into style with some VS bras. The overall construction seems nice, with thick adjustable straps that are soft on the underside. However, the elastic in the band sits directly against my skin without no lining, and causes discomfort after a while. Man, do I love a satin lining, and any company that’s “designer” should use this!

Adore Bra and Vanessa Thong

Adore Bra and Vanessa Thong

Jezebel Adore Bra

Sadly, this bra has also been discontinued in the black and pink, which I think looks awesome. Designer Intimates still sells the demi bra in the white and blue, but the details don’t stand out as much. The pink cups on mine are overlaid with black mesh that has scalloped vertical seems and heart-shaped flecks. There’s light padding, but the cups are pretty soft. Between the breasts is a larger pink bow and a small keyhole below it.

For a demi bra, the cups seem like they’re cut a little high.  The straps are thick and have that ruched-like ribbon detail on the top, which is amazing. The bands are mesh wit elastic borders, which I suspect wouldn’t be ideal for all day wear and aren’t as supportive as dual-layer bands.

I ordered the Vanessa thong because it’s pink with black lace overlay with flocking. What can I say, I like the look! I thought it would match, and it does well enough. The details on this are fantastic, bit scalloped lace along the legs in front and a center bow. The back is a soft black mesh, which might be more comfortable if you’re not a fan of lace. I also think it’s ideal for smoothing over curves. I opted for the large with is pretty much a perfect fit but you might want to opt down a size if you don’t like your thongs rising too high in back.

Overall, I had better experience with sleepwear and panties from Designer Intimates. The bras seemed a little cheap in construction and feel; although, that might be good enough if you’re wearing them with the plan to take them off soon. There is quite a variation between sizes of panties. I tend to opt for smaller cut if I’m going for a bikini or hipster and a larger cut for a thong, which worked out for me pretty well here.

Because this post has gotten so long, expect the giveaway in its own post!


Lovehoney Open Back Sheer Lace Panties with Straps

December 11th, 2014

I purchased my first pair of “strap” or cage panties this summer. I discovered that I quite like them; although, the design isn’t exactly the same as Lovehoney’s take on the design with their new addition to the lingerie line. Lovehoney’s design is cut further down your ass in a deep “U” shape.  There’s also a rather large pink bow, which makes this a fun thing to wear if you want to be your lover’s gift.

Alas, I will not get that experience. As it happens, these panties seem to run a little large. There’s quite a lot of fabric, and the large just swamped my hips and ass. In the front, they almost reached my belly button. There’s a rise of 8.5 inches in front, and the design of the straps in back means they technically reach 9.5 or 10 inches high because they arch upward. You can see this in the product photo but.. TEN inches. That’s.. just huge.

I sometimes wear a large in panties when they’re cut smaller, and most panties created as lingerie — as opposed to everyday wear — run smaller. This is not the case with these panties from Lovehoney. I have 41-inch hips and I’m not lacking in the derriere. Perhaps the lace stretches out more than typical panties, because a large should even be a little snug on me according to the size chart. In fact, these panties measure at least 2 inches wide than Felina panties in a large.

lovehoney open back lace panties

lovehoney open back lace panties

If they do fit, the front is cut with a single mesh panel in the style of hipsters. This is a more modest cut; although, it’s certainly a revealing fabric choice, as is the cut and fabric in the back of the underwear. The lace in the back continues that cut, covering most if not all of your cheeks. Although, the deep “U” shows plenty of crack and cheek in the center. Ther lace is fringed toward this cutout. It’s a great detail. There is one vertical center strap that connects to three shorter straps on either side. This is where the pink bow is secured.

Construction of these panties does seem pretty secure, without any loose strings or obvious options. Jagged nails and the like might cause snagging.  Obviously, the lace, ribbon and strap design is more delicate than some cotton duds. Hand-washing is a great idea. This will prevent the straps from coming undone or the lace from breaking down, which is a frequent issue that lacy panties have. I’m typically pretty bold with my delicates, so I wash them in a net bag. Actually, it’s the one I got with the Sasha harness. Because of the delicate nature and the lack of crotch liner, I don’t think I would wear these as a regular panty under your clothes. You might dress up in them for a specific event or session. Plus, the bright pink bow is the type that would bother me in, say, regular jeans. The top straps would peek out anyway.

These type of panties might be a little strange feeling to begin with because they leave some skin revealed. I found the center strap to be much more noticeable than on my other, similar pair of panties. I think it’s because it goes up so high. These panties might work better if they didn’t have this strap at all. It’s not really needed to give them shape.

The waistband isn’t as tight or secure as typical panties, so you’ll need hips enough to keep these in place. If you’re carrying extra weight around your stomach, I can imagine them rolling down and not giving the desired effect. However, if these do work with your size and shape, that effect includes plenty of detail and more than a hint of sexiness, which is why I was drawn to them in the first place.

Look at the sizing chart carefully when ordering to ensure you get a pair that fits, however! This is especially important if you’re buying these as a gift, and I do think they would make a nice one — hint hint!

Christmas Lingerie at Lovehoney, 365 Day No Hassle Returns