A Very Sexy Halloween with ILovesexy.com [Review]

October 27th, 2013

Cheetah-Licious Costume

I’m something of a crazy cat lady, so this costume made perfect sense for me. Unfortunately, it’s just not a perfect costume. It’s all about sizing, but even though I ordered mine, this isn’t super flattering. It’s due to the sizing. It runs snug. Think original Star Trek uniforms. This is so small/tight as to be a top, and it might look cute with some leggings. I’m not a legging person, however. I was really hoping to wear it with the petticoat but there’s just no room.

So let’s start from the bottom up. The furry border on the bottom barely covers my own bottom (maybe some booty shorts would look cute). This is standing up. There’s no way it’ll cover anything sitting down. I like to wear petticoats to help cover my ass with costumes, but it fixts like a second skin, so there’s really no room.

This is snug around the midsection in a way that I find unflattering. Period. The velour material seems thinner than other costumes I’ve worn, so this only adds to the issue. The costume isn’t for you if your middle is your trouble section and you won’t wanna wear some Spanx.

This costume has some problematic.. spots

This costume has some problematic.. spots

The breast area probably looked the best, but it’s not without its own issues. The neck is low and square, so my bra wanted to show. A demi or shelf cup would be best. Even though the top was tight around my breasts, there’s only C cups, so the lace didn’t pull apart as much as you’d expect. I think there’s simply a bit much material and a wider V cut would help with this. Mine came laces backwards, with the bow on the bottom, but it’s easily fixed.

The neckline leads you to the hood, which is huge. You’ll see it in the photos. It hangs down over my nose. I didn’t have the help of a partner to take a picture of this, however. While you can wear it further back, the ears so of become lost. The ribbons and balls that hang down are for looks only. They do not actually adjust the hood, so keep that in mind.

The arms are probably my favorite part. Long sleeves can sometimes be quite flattering on me. These were snug but with enough room to move. The fur at the ends was cute, but be careful not to drag it in your party dip. I’m only 5’2 and these were a tad long, but they may be short for taller women.

Of course, on a taller woman this would literally be a hoodie, and that’s the problem. Plus sized costumes usually are longer — as is the case with the petticoat — but this one just isn’t. It makes me wonder how long the other sizes are. The measurements follow:

  • Length (shoulder to hem): 32″
  • Width at hem: 22″ flat
  • Width breasts: 18″ flat
  • Waist width: 16.5″
  • Arm length: 23″

These numbers certainly don’t suggest an XL to me.

If I were to try to wear this, I’d go with leggings under the leg warmers, which are also kind of a fail. They run long on my 5’2″ frame but tight. The elastic around the top stretches to around 8 inches, but it feels super super. I have muscular calves. Around the bottom, it’s open to cover your footwear — 11 inches flat. The leg warmes are just under 18 inches long. However, they’re more easy to adjust than the rest of the piece.

Thigh highs always look sexy

Thigh highs always look sexy

Sheer Lace Top Thigh High Stockings With Backseam

I experienced the same “issues” with the thigh highs as I do other plus-size items. I tend to fall directly between one size and plus size. So these went on easily. They sat against my skin nicely. They didn’t cut in, but they also weren’t snug enough to keep up. This was especially true with the first garter belt I used them with, which has longer straps. There was just too much slack in the garters, so I switched it out to another pair with shorter straps. This worked fine but, as you know if you’ve ever worn a garter belt with stockings, it’s just a pain to get them into place. Fortunately, I did this before Halloween, so I know which one to use when it comes down to it.

Although this comes with a large band, which I think is more flattering in curvier thighs, there’s no elastic backing. So you’ll definitely need garters to keep it up. The lace band measures about 8″ across unstretched. It stretches to at least 10″, but I don’t have a third hand so that’s a fuzzy estimate. As for length, I found these a little long to sit at mid-thigh with my shorts legs. At 5’2″ I’m definitely on the bottom range. The thigh highs weren’t quite as taut as I’d like them, so these would ideally fit someone a little wider in the thigh and taller for me. However, that’s really good news for anyone who’s a little higher up in the “plus” size range.

The appeal of these stockings is definitely the backseam. It’s super sexy, but hard to photograph by one’s self with such short arms. You’ll have to adjust it after you pull them on, even if you think you’re pulling them on straight. However, it’s super visually attractive.

I’d generally recommend these but with a few caveats. There won’t last more than a couple wearings, even if you handwash. The nylon is delicate, but that’s really the case with all thigh highs. There’s no reinforced toe, so it might be especially likely to rip or run there. Of course, I found that the mesh and lace got caught in my nails, which is hard to avoid when you have nails. However, my garters didn’t immediately put holes in the lace, which is good.

Petticoat: also long and fluffy!

Petticoat: also long and fluffy!

Plus Size Petticoat

I’ve already got a pretty pink petticoat that I love, so I knew what I wanted when it came to getting on in black. In short, I want fluffy! This petticoat has two layers to offer some fluff. A satin panel toward the top helps with modesty, too. I generally like it; however, it’s far longer than the product images. This is likely due to the fact that the product page uses the one size model, and the plus size is cut longer/larger.

For reference, the petticoate is about 17 inches long at the longest point. The satin panel is 5 inches. The waist measures 14 inches flat/unstretched. There’s a lot of stretch to be had in this, so while it fits me almost loosely, it’ll go up to the 1x or 2x range, too, I’d think.

As for length, you can simply roll up the elastic band or pull it up higher if you’re wearing it under something else. That’s what I did.

1 Comment

Kissable Lace Babydoll & G-string

May 7th, 2012

This review has been a long time coming and.. well, er.. I don’t know why. I think it’s because I just really didn’t like it in person and, in hindsight, I’m not sure why I thought I would like it. I guess I thought the Kissable Lace Babydoll & G-string looked kind of elegant in the product image but, in person, that lace just looks cheap and tacky. It’s all “I’m a Halloween store up in here? Would you like some black lipstick with that, Adriana?” And I’m all “Shut up about my teenaged years, you’re a hunk of fabric.”

Not much fabric, really ,which is my second problem. This is one size but, like my recent Coquette experiments is too small around my 38″ ribcage. In fact, this one seems smaller than the other chemise. I’d recommend it for 36″ at the most. I’m thinking that someone in the 32-34″ range would be better. Because the waistband is just a thin piece of elastic, it cuts into the skin as you get closer to the top of that range and, “fits up to 48-inches”? Coquette, you’re a fucking liar. There is NO way in hell this is going to fit beyond 40″. This is truly a one-size-fits-few piece.

So, I do like the cups. I love the black lace over the red triangle pieces and they’re less discount-Goth feeling. The lace extends on the side in a way that I could do without but don’t hate. There’s a cute little red bow in the center. It’s definitely feminine. They’re also pretty small, at least, they seemed smaller on me than the model. With just the thin elastic, you can’t much count on any support. Again, Coquette has made the mistake of using in inflexible ribbon for the straps, which I don’t feel is really going to stay put when you move the adjusters. In fact, I like elastic straps; I feel like they support me better.

The lace from the waist down is free flowing, so ideally it would suit different body shapes if, you know, the top wasn’t so damned tight. It’s not very long at all, though. It really barely meets the hips, as you can see on the model. It’s this giant floral and mesh motif that is just not pretty.

The G-string isn’t the cheapest thing ever. It features the same lace overlay on the front panel, with a centered red bow. The G-string runs just as small as the babydoll, however, and is mostly elastic. I didn’t spend enough time with either piece to have to launder it, but I don’t think you’ll want to put it in the machine unless you at least use a lingerie bag. Hand washing would probably be preferable. The set is 100% nylon, which the Internet says can be washed in warm water and tumbled dry on low. I threw out the box because.. it’s lingerie and it doesn’t need to come in a fucking box that is made of more material than the product in it!

So is this kissable? If it’s some sort of kissing my ass on the way out the door, then yes. If you’re the 1% you might like it but, if you have any reservations, please get something less shitty than this.


Kissable Chemise

April 14th, 2012

In a recent review, I talked about how I am in between Coquette’s OS and queen size. It’s frustrating. The leopard babydoll was too big, but this chemise just runs too small on me. Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem to be available in plus size, so I was really hoping to make this one work. I should have known better as it’s form fitting, but I really like the design.

The Kissable chemise actually doesn’t look quite as bad as I’d expect, and that’s due to the material around the midsection and behind. It’s a slightly sheer nylon material that’s thicker than it looks in the pictures. On me, it’s not nearly as sheer. The material has some stretch, but it’s also thick enough to hug my curves like a dress and is slimming. Even though my curves still show in a somewhat less-than-flattering way, I was far less self conscious than I expected.

Then there’s the boobs.The lace that covers the boobs is cut flat along the waistline and it looks SO much bigger on the model than it actually is. At the tallest, the cups measure just 6″. I need far more material to cover my C-cups. The result is that they’re squished to my chest, making me look much smaller than I actually am. This is a shame, because it’s really the top portion of this that attracted me. There’s three vertical stripes of ribbon that add a bit of visual flair over the floral lace. This is arranged to cover the model’s nipples, but in real life, it’s less practical than that. I feel like my boobs would have looked better if they were perfectly round implants.

Let me give you an example of sizing. Flat, this measures 13″ at the bust and 18″ at the bottom hem, which is the widest part. To say it fits a 40″ hip is a stretch, literally. From the waist band to the hem, it’s 18″ long, give or take half an inch. This is pretty common, but it definitely seems to sit higher on me than on the model. It’s a barely-covering-my-ass kinda deal. This might not be the case with less curvy women, of course, but the material is probably stretched pretty far on the model. Although this piece stretches a bit past that, but not as much to truly make this one size. A 26″ bust is actually smaller than Coquette’s XS. If I had to resize this, I’d call it a S/M. It’ll work on very proportionate larges but it’s definitely cut far smaller than the OS label suggests.

So the quality on this is better than I expected, considering how much I had to struggle to get in and out of it. I wouldn’t bother hand washing it if you have a lingerie bag. However, it seems like the entire kissable line used thin ribbons instead of elastic shoulder bands, and I hate this! The adjusters on the straps slip because there’s no friction on the straps, and the straps don’t offer the stretchiness that I like.

This piece comes in a box, FYI. Hate that. So wasteful.

This is one piece that I’ll probably keep around a while, in hopes that I drop some weight and can pull it off. I might even consider wearing it as a slip, beneath a dress. I would absolutely buy it in queen size, though. For now, I hope someone who is considering buying this will be steered in the right direction because of my frustrations.


Kissable Leopard Babydoll and G-String

March 30th, 2012

I am a at a weird in-between point with Coquette’s lingerie, it seems. OS stuff either just fits, but awkwardly, or doesn’t fit at all. And the plus size? Pretty much swamps me. This sucks because I really like the Kissable Leopard Babydoll and G-String, but it’s just a bit too large in the plus size.

Although this runs large with my 38″ bra band/ribs, it’s not a big deal toward the bottom. It’s just more flowy, and I don’t mind. My problem is with the cups, which seem to be too large and sit too low on my body. I’ve actually discovered that if I pull the straps together on my back, racerback style, it fits much better. I think I will find up getting one of those bra strap clips or cutting the straps to create a halter out of this instead.

That way I will be able to wear to sleep. As long as you remember that this piece is sheer and don’t answer the door in it, it’ll work well as a sleepwear piece. The lace detail on the bottom hem and around the cups seems to be sewn pretty well, as does the ribbon and bow around the waist. The ribbon is only sewn to the sides, not around the back, though. I always find that look to be a little odd. With this being a little too large on me, the cups fall to the side as I sleep and my boobs pop right out. Hello there, girls!

The straps extend to a maximum of 21″, with a minimum of 11″. The waist is about 17.5″ flat. It stretches to 25″ flat. From the top of the ribbon at the waist to the bottom of the hem, this piece is about 16″. With the 7″ cups, I really needed to adjust the straps to their shortest, so this hit me at the top of my thigh. Part of the reason I opted for the plus size was that it appeared longer. However, on my short frame, I have to wear it shorter to fit me up top. =/

And the G-string? Well it’s mostly elastic, with one long triangle of leopard-printed mesh and lace detail on top. Even though I can stretch the elastic way up over my hips, the fabric in front is much lower, barely covering my mons. It also has the weird Y-style in back, which I hate. I prefer my G-strings to be sewn as a T. No one expects a fantastic G-string in these sets, though.

Here’s the pros, folks:

  • It’s super comfy in silky mesh
  • It’s cute and leopard-y, meow
  • It’s easy to wear
  • It’s flattering on a variety of shapes
  • It’s priced pretty well. PinkCherry is selling it for less than $30.
  • It will fit the larger ladies well
  • It seems to be sewn well enough

But there’s some cons too:

  • The adjustable straps are un-stretchy ribbon, so the adjusters seem to move on me
  • I’ve noticed the ribbons have started fraying, too.
  • And one of my straps is sewn so that the ribbons are twisted and can’t be fixed
  • There’s not a lot of breast support
  • The thong is going to fit even fewer folks, I’d imagine
  • Although it has no breast support, I feel like the cups are designed to fit D-breasts on up

If you’re sure about your size when it comes to Coquette, go ahead and order this piece. I love the way it feels on my skin and will definitely be trying to fix it up so that it fits me better.

1 Comment

Material Girl Fetish Fantasy Lingerie

January 24th, 2012

oor Every Mistake A Lingerie Manufacturer Could Make.

I can’t even pretend that this was a success. I mean, I knew its form-fitting nature would be a risk with my shape but I didn’t also realize that it was a design disaster.

Let’s start with what I don’t hate. The fingerless fishnet gloves. Now, you might be thinking “fingerless gloves are the show-stealer?” and, I kid you not, it’s the truth. They’re simple: a tube with one reinforced end for around the wrist and a small hole on one side for your thumb. The end that slips around your arm/wrist is reinforced, I guess, to keep it from moving. However, these are comfortably snug on me so I don’t see them going anywhere. On the other hand, if you have large wrists or hands, they might be too snug. However, there’s stretch. In fact, these gloves can stretch to around 8″ in length or wear them a little shorter. I tend to pull mine up about 1.5″ from my wrist or about 5″ long.

Both the thumb-hole and edge around the hand are slightly reinforced so they won’t rip.. but one glove is actually ripping at the hem or perhaps was never sewn on correctly. So don’t expect those reinforced edges to do too much. For some strange reason, Pipedream felt the need to sew a (black) tag into one of the glove. Hand wash cold, you guys. I mean that information is sort of useful but tags on see-through stuff.. I’m so over it.

Anyway, I could see myself stealing these for a costume or different outfit.

So while I don’t love the actual, thigh-high fishnets, they’re not as awful as the chemise itself. It’s a basic pair of fishnets with about a 1″ elastic band at the top. They’re definitely meant for someone taller than 5″2, as I could pull them damned near up to my crotch. Still, with a little adjusting they are passable. The fishnets do not come ripped. Thank-whoever-you-want-to-thank. Because then I’d have thrown them out. Like the gloves, I could also see myself wearing them with someone else or pairing them with a garter belt.

For a queen size, though, the fishnets seem a little small. They measure 6″ in diameter, flat. They stretch to about twice that, which just doesn’t seem that large to me. The stretching causes them to cut into your skin. A thicker band at the top would definitely be more flattering. Even the “one size” model is overflowing from the fishnets.

I suspect they’re also lower quality than fishnets I’ve worn in the past. In fact, the box tells you to rip them as you desire so they would have to be. As the netting itself stretches out, you can see the fibers that make it starting to pull away from one another, like a strand of Christmas lights that’s seen one decade too many (-cough-don’t look on my patio-cough-).

But they’re usable.

I wish I could say as much about the chemise. Actually, I don’t. Writing this review is fun!

So, it was a risk. I knew that but I even though the way those straps on the chemise looked on the plus-sized model was sort of flattering to your tummy and I’d hoped the same. I was also encouraged by the fact that this is available in three sizes: one size, queen and diva. I was hoping this would provide more realistic sizing options even though it’s still in a range.

I was wrong. Dead wrong. So so wrong. Wrong baby wrong. Yea, we hear you Martina McBride, Depeche Mode. I usually wind up on the just-shy-of-plus-side end of things but if this is their queen, if this is what they think will fit ladies in sizes 16 through 20 they’re on fucking crack. Maybe that’s why they’re so keen of ripping fishnets. I don’t know.

So the chemise itself is pretty snug on me. It smooshes my C-cups in ways that are completely not flattering with the sheer mesh (also hand wash, cold). There isn’t any support, per se, but surely larger women could benefit from this chemise binding pushing their breasts into their backs? (Ha!). And, if you have some extra tummy; look away. I do not know how it flattered the model so well but it does not on me.

There’s also this really weird thing. I cannot get this thing down over my ass. It’s super fucking short. Like, dude, I’m 5’2″ and who knew Pipedream was making Hobbit lingerie, right? I can only imagine how much worse it would be for taller ladies.

Okay, but the big issue — and I mean really big — is the straps, while visually interesting are just full of what-the-fuckery. They’re all stretchy (more-so than the chemise) and adjustable and while this sounds good.. it’s actually a ridiculous hassle. When I pulled this over my head, they all bunched above my boobs and then I had to try to find the chemise to pull it down and then I had to pull down every strap and try to situate it. Yours may not bunch up over your boobs; I can imagine it bunching up right under the boobs, depending on how far you pull it down but it’s not easy to put on. That’s where I’m going with this.

After I spent a bunch of time adjusting the front straps — and it still looked mediocre at best — I realized I had to do the same in the back. Except my short arms were no good at it so I said “Fuck it” and let them fall where they hideously may. I really think it would be better to have sewn the straps into place to avoid all this mess. Would it have hindered the stretchiness of the chemise? Yes. Then again, it’s not sized correctly anyway.

Now, there’s those little buckles in the pictures and the different models wear them at different locations so I thought I’d try my hand at adjusting them. I figured this would slightly change the position of the straps and allow me to hide trouble areas but, once they’re stretched out, they become nearly impossible to move. They slide easily when you’re not wearing the piece but it’s a different story when you’re not. Of course, how do I know where I want the buckle to sit on stretchy straps when I’m not wearing it?

Last complaint, I promise. These pieces come in a sturdy cardboard box. Each is then in its own bag and the fishnets are each wrapped around a pair of paperboard. It’s wasteful and who needs a an actual box for their lingerie? Shit’s not precious is all I’m saying.


Sinner’s Paradise

November 6th, 2011

This outfit/costume/lingerie (available from sex toy retailer MyPleasure) looks so much better in pictures than it does in person.. it’s ridiculous.

First, let me outline the few good things about this piece. I like the cut. It’s a chemise that’s ruched directly down the front. This texture makes me feel less self conscious so I like it. The halter is flattering on the boobs and I like how they looked when it was tied. The tie halter means this will better fit a variety of chest sizes; however, it’s intended for the bustier of us. The idea of a devil costume as a chemise works quite well and there’s feminine ruffles around the halter ties and bottom hem. The stitching all seems secure. The mesh is fine and soft and stretches nicely. I did order mine in the “Queen” size and it fits loosely so it’s good for 1x-2x, I’d suggest.

Where the tail attachesNow for the bad. This just wasn’t well though out as a costume. The tail is a mesh-wrapped wire that ends in a mesh point. It’s permanently sewn to the back of the costume which pretty much means handwash only. I guess I don’t know how you’d detach it but it’s a bit awkward. You can bend and shape the tail but it always falls down. The most you can do is, like in the picture, extend it slightly from your ass in a downward direction. That can still be cute, though. The tail is definitely more functional as a cat toy. Be careful.

The horns, on the other hand, are a complete failure. They consist of horn-shaped mesh over plastic “bones” all attached to a string headband. You know, the type you tie under your hair? The worst kind there is. For the life of me, I cannot manage to make them stick up. They always lie flat. I don’t think I’m going out on a limb when I suggest the publicity image uses an entirely different headpiece. Sorry.

Tip of the tailThe outfit is more sheer in person than the image suggests. This isn’t a bad thing per se but I wouldn’t wear this outside the bedroom. There’s actually double layers of mesh over the cups so it’s slightly less sheer. I like that.. Except, the outside layer of mesh seems to be really loose to the cups look saggy. I would probably notice more than a lover but it feels unflattering on my C-cups. Larger breasts women will fill it out a little better but a single layer of stretchy mesh would solve the problem.

There’s not much to say about the included G-string. It seems to run large, even for the queen size. It’s mesh and elastic and forgettable.

If you simply want to add some spice to the bedroom, you can certainly concoct a fun little scene out of the Sinner’s Paradise lingerie costume but if you want a real costume, look for something higher quality.


Zebra Print Satin Babydoll

October 7th, 2011

The Zebra Print Satin Babydoll is super pretty and I really wished it worked for me but this is a case of both-sizes-probably-only-fit-if-your-breasts-have-been-surgically-enhanced.

This is sad because the piece of really cute. The mesh is fine and soft if not quite as silky as some other mesh I’ve owned. It’s stretchy and seems pretty strong. The zebra striped satin accents are bold and cute. The bottom hem features a straight 1″ or so border of this satin and will all toward the upper part of your thigh. In the model’s images, it’s significantly wider so that may be a difference between the sizes. The cups are also cute and there’s an unobtrusive black satin bow between them. It’s a simple design that will

But when you take a closer look at the publicity images, you can see that the cups are just designed hugely and, because they’re a non-stretchy material, it’s hard to arrange them artfully. There is actually elastic on the sides of the triangle material which means, if you happen to have midgets taped to your chest, they’ll fit. But I’d gander that, with the queen size, anyone smaller than a D is going to feel pretty overwhelmed with the amount of material. I mean, if I just compared my bra (C-cup), the babydoll has twice as much material per cup.

Even if you are larger in the chest and thinner at the waist, the cups don’t offer any support really. The empire waist isn’t reinforced so if you don’t love the natural shape or sag of your breasts, you might be disappointed, too.

So that made me sad but also confused because it’s obvious that the model has huge fucking boobs and that the cups are just out of proportion to the rest of the piece because I really don’t see how — even with the stretchy mesh — the queen would fit more than an XL and many women with breasts naturally that large have some extra weight. The standard size isn’t even that loose on the model and she’s pretty thin.

Unfortunately, there’s a couple quality issues with the Zebra Print Satin Babydoll, too. First, the strap adjusters are really super hard to move. I feel like I need to chew on them or that my nails are going to break. It’s a total pain. Secondly, the stitching is coming out of the bow after one wash. So the bow has lost it shapes and, because it must have been slightly attached to the bottom of one cup, the satin has started fraying. There’s also some fuzzies coming off of the satin trim at the bottom. Overall, the satin seems kind of cheap.

The queen size comes with a giant thong. Again with the enlarged proportions? It’s elastic and mesh and your typical thong-included thong. Replace it with a comfortable, fitting black or white panty and you’re good to go.

So while this isn’t my favorite piece, it’s not that expensive either. If you’re blessed with the breasts and like the design, you might give it a try. If you’re not so well endowed, look for something a little more forgiving.