Satisfyer (Pro 2, 2, Pro Penguin) Comparison Review

June 27th, 2017

I’m a little late on this whole pulsating-air-clitoral-stimulator craze. To be honest, I wasn’t super interested. I’m not typically a direct clit stim girl, usually preferring a broader/rounder sort of stimulation on my entire vulva. And the toy that came out first, well, it has a terrible name (Womanizer).

But when the Satisfyer company contacted me about a review, I said “Sure.” I didn’t expect much, to be honest. So when three different models (Satisfyer Pro 2, Satisfyer Penguin and Satisfyer 2) showed up, I was pretty excited at having the chance to compare them. And when I realized that I didn’t really know how they worked, so I quickly stuck my fingers in the holes to see.

Oh.em.gee.

The sucking mechanism (or pressure wave, if you will) of the Satisfyer toys immediately seemed like something that would feel good. Amazing. God-like.

And maybe it is — just not for me. In order to enjoy any of the Satisfyer toys, you should probably enjoy direct clitoral stimulation. As I mentioned above and in a plethora of reviews, I am not that sort of person. Ultimately, I wound up feeling aroused, adjusting to the suction, turning each toy all the way up and.. waiting. Before awkwardly grinding against the body of the toy to get off.

Suction alone just isn’t enough to get me off. I don’t think this concept marries well with my style of masturbating.

But let’s back up.

All the Satisfiers are devices with hard plastic shells. There’s something of a nozzle on the head, into which a silicone piece slips. This leaves a hole that you place over your clitoris, or potentially nipple, and suction comes from within the device in steady pulses. This direct stimulation is going to be too much for some people to handle, and there’s not really a way to dial it back like you might by using a vibratnig through underwear or clothing. All three toys are waterproof, but I don’t use toys in water.

Satisfyer 2

Satisfyer 2, cousin to a thermometer?

The Satisfyer 2 is, by far, the most medicinal-looking of the models. Someone might easily mistake one of these toys for an ear thermometer if they saw it sitting in your bathroom and didn’t actually handle it. You might think this makes it the least sexy of all the Satisfyer devices, but I actually think this title should be left to the Satisfyer Pro Penguin because its animal shape make me feel.. weird.

satisfyer pro penguin

Never before have animal shapes bothered me on a sex toy

This model is definitely longer and wider (at the head) than either the Pro Penguin or Satisfyer Pro 2. The Pro 2 is definitely the newer, streamlined option. It’s less boxy and more ergonomic – and the gold-and-white color scheme is inverted. A note on the Satisyer Pro 2: there are two different versions available under the same name. If yours has the embossed name on the handle, it’s the newer model that also happens to be quieter than the old version.

If you use either the Satisfyer 2 or Pro 2, you can aim the handle toward your belly button to reach the buttons, which are on top. However, that placement feels awkward for me. I’ve rarely had a clitoral toy where this wasn’t the case, though. The Penguin is curvy and smaller, nearly fitting in my hand. If I turn it handle-up, I can use my thumb to reach the buttons that are technically on the underside of the toy, and this is the most comfortable usage for me. I might be alone in this.

Satisfyer 2 alone has three buttons: power, plus, and minus. The others simply have two, which I prefer, one for on/off and one for cycling through the settings. The Satysfier Pro 2’s buttons make quite the loud clicking noise in use.

satisfyer pro 2

Satisfyer Pro 2 has a curvier design and more plush nozzle

Each has a removable silicone head for ease of cleaning (you’re still going to want to wipe down the exterior and inner hole of the plastic, however). The silicone nozzle on the Satisfyer 2 is in between the Penguin and Satisfyer Pro 2 in terms of which. The Pro 2 is quite thick and wide like a donut. The Penguin has the thinnest and smallest nozzle. But the inner tubes are actually sized opposite, with the Penguin having the largest circumference, the Satisfyer 2 in the middle, and the Satisfier Pro 2 having the snuggest fit.

Nozzles of the Satisfyer Pro 2, 2 and Pro Penguins

Nozzles of the Satisfyer Pro 2, 2 and Pro Penguins

The last way that the older Satisfyer model differs is in noise. It’s much louder than the other two, sounding akin to a small kitchen appliance. I think the Penguin is the quietest of the two, but the difference between it and the Satisfyer Pro 2 is less than the difference between either of those two and the Satisfyer 2.

The Satisfyer 2 is the only model that I received to try that ran on batteries — 2 AAAs. So it took a while for me to try it out because, apparently, it’s too much work to grab my already-charged batteries and insert them. Fortunately, the Satisfyer 2 works with rechargeables.

While I am not usually a fan of something that runs on AAAs, it seems like the suction mechanism of the Satisfyer toys isn’t decreased nearly as much vibrations do on a battery-operated toy. In fact, I think the Satisfyer 2 might be stronger than the Satisfyer Pro Penguin, and the motor does have the highest decibel rating of all the Satisfyer models, but it’s harder for me to discern power level between the toys and even between the levels on a single toy.

The Satisfyer comes with 11 levels, but I can’t really tell the difference. I can only confirm this by turning it all the way up and then backing down level by level. But to my clit or nipple, it’s not a huge difference. Once I get past the fourth level or so, they all feel pretty much the same. I think this is because the frequency of the suction has increased so much that it’s hard to differentiate between each pulse. As you can guess, I’m not thoroughly impressed by the different levels on the Satisfyer toys, and that’s how I feel about vibrators, too. 3-5 more distinct levels would be the better option here.

Although telling apart the toys via suction levels is difficult, it’s easier based on the way the size and shape of the silicone compartment feels. The silicone head of the Satisfyer Pro 2 is squishier, but the tube is also a tighter fit, making it easy to tell when it’s in place. The thinner silicone of the Penguin means you can more easily feel the rigid plastic behind it, but you can definitely feel that the inner chamber is wider. I think I like the shape and size of the silicone head of the Satisfyer 2 the best because it lands squarely in the middle in terms of squishiness and snugness.

But even having tried these three toys leaves me somewhat at a loss for words when it comes to recommending them. If you’ve never tried anything like the Satisfyer, I’m not sure how to compare it. I know you should like direct clitoral stimulation.

Nevertheless, it’s hard to recommend one of the specific models. The Satisfyer 2 and Penguin feel pretty similar suction-wise. If you were really opposed to batteries, I’d recommend the Penguin. It also feels the best in my hand.

It’s pretty difficult to recommend a toy based on head size/shape/angle, though. I think you just need to try them (I did, and I’m not sure if there’s one that I prefer). Unfortunately, Satisfyer doesn’t make their toys with multiple-sized heads like the competition, so I’d advise checking them out if you’re curious about size.

Satisfyer models are cheaper. I’m not sure if all three of theses are still current, but you can buy them from Adam and Eve with the Satisfyer 2 the cheapest at $49.99. The Satisfyer Pro 2 will cost you the most at just under $100, but it’s still cheaper than any Womanizer by $30. The Pro Penguin falls in the middle at $69.99.

Dangerous Lilly has a fantastic comparison chart and write-up of the different Satisfyer and Womanizer models (which I have yet to try) on her blog. She also has photos of the various heads, which you’ll find helpful. We both seem to enjoy the Satisfyer 2 for what it’s worth.

I’m not sure I’ve ever come across a toy that was so difficult to recommend based on either experience or specs. That’s probably why so many people seem to have tried these or similar toys.

If you want to try any of the Satisfyers, you probably won’t find them from the same retailer. The Satisfyer Pro 2 is on sale for $69.99 from Shevibe. Otherwise, you can pick up the Satisfyer 2 and Satisfyer Pro Penguin from the Of Sex and Love Store for $49 and $66, respectively.

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Luxe Touch-Sensitive Vibrating Dildo

May 3rd, 2017

From the pictures, Cal Exotic’s new Luxe vibrating “dildo” looks like many of the silicone dildos on the market. It has a suction cup base and a slightly contoured head. You can choose from bright pink or purple or two more fleshlike colors.

Of course, it’s not a dildo because it’s actually a vibrator. I guess the suction cups, which works but I will never use, counts this thing as a dildo in someone’s book. It would be harness-compatible, but I’m still not feeling the nomenclature. It’s not a dildo, okay? Luxe is also not as sleek in person as it seems — so much for being luxe — and that’s where I need to focus the beginning of this review.

In person, you can clearly see a white, cylindrical casing beneath the thin layer of silicone that covers it. The silicone is so sheer that it harkens back to a time of PVC jelly vibrators and rabbits with their innards revealed for the world to see. Now, I suspect that the function of this vibrator requires a different interior than others, and I’ll get to that later.

But this whole thing seems like such a weird design flaw that you could see through it. And what I can see? Isn’t the best. During the initial washing, I saw what appears to be a crack in that inner piece of plastic, which was easy to spot through the silicone. I hadn’t even had a chance to use the Luxe, yet. So it’s not looking good for this one.

Crack in the toy

Usually I break the toys myself, but this one came pre-broken??

The more I looked, the more cracks I saw. I.. what?

Cracks in the inner mechanism

I can’t even think of a joke to crack about this. Oh, wait, there it is!

Well, what about its touch-sensitive capabilities? I’ve got slightly better news for you.

This function works not by squeezing the vibrator harder like the Limon or Ola, which is what I initially assumed, but by responding to the area of the shaft that’s squeezed. To illustrate, if you wrap one hand around the shaft, it doesn’t seem to increase vibrations. But adding your second hand beneath it increases the intensity. You can assume that thrusting the toy internally would achieve the same effect. Whether it’s noticeable internally is up for debate, however.

And, to be honest, I’m not a huge fan of the shape or size of this toy, and I think it’s part of that inner mechanism, which feels pretty rigid under the thin silicone coating. Although I don’t need a curved toy for G-spot stimulation, the absolute straightness of the Luxe isn’t comfortable. In fact, it’s almost painful despite only having a 1.5-inch diameter, which is the same throught the entire shaft.

If the shaft tapered a bit more before the head (or overall), it’d be fine. But then the toy might not be sensitive to touches. Perhaps that mechanism should be located further toward the base, or the diameter slightly smaller overall. As it is, Luxe just feels invasive, and I can’t enjoy the touch sensitive function.

It’s a shame because I would like to. The rounded head works well enough for G-spot stimulation, the vibrations are more rumbly than buzzy, and the strength is decent. It’s not like a Hitachi, but it’s definitely good enough. I even liked some of the modes, which never happens.

I think there’s promise if they can offer the same function in a variety of sizes. I am assuming that it’s a size constraint due to what I can see through the silicone, but what the hell do I know, right? If ever there were a toy that I wanted to rip apart, it’s the Luxe. And perhaps I will. After all, it’s already on its way to breaking.

One last gripe: I kind of hate when toys have a single button and require you to hold it to turn it off. I would rather have to hit a down button 8 million times or have a separate master power button. I want an auto off and find myself ridiculously annoyed when this isn’t an option.

I might be alone in this. Luxe has a pretty high rating on GoodVibes, but none of those people left reviews, so take that with a grain of salt.

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A Toy A Day #2: We-Vibe Tango

September 4th, 2016

I recently took a look at my nightstand and realized that there were dozens of toys that I neglect. Not only should I use them more, but I should use them at all. Even my favorites have been collecting dust as of late. More often than not, I use toys only to review them and stick to manual stimulation when I want to get off because it’s quicker and more convenient.

There’s nothing wrong with this per se, but I do feel as though my sexuality isn’t completely integrated with the rest of my life lately. And it’s not just because I am perpetually single.

Regardless, I can change the situation with my sex toys. So as summer winds down, batteries will be recharged, and I will work my way through the draw. I expect to remember how much I loved some toys, be disappointed with those that I have grown apart from and be surprised by toys that has finally won me over.

I plan to detail this attempt in a little project called A Toy A Day.


I guess I never got around to reviewing the We-Vibe Tango on my blog. I think it’s because so many people liked it. And I can generally see why. It came in a tiny package but had rumbly – albeit not super strong vibrations. Few companies were offering vibrators of this caliber and certainly not in this package.

I’ve never been a huge fan of lipstick vibrators, though I’ve tried this one and the Mia by Lelo. They work.. eventually. But getting off is a finicky process that requires a lot of involvement. I prefer rounded shapes, like the head of the Laya Spot or the Yooo or even my long-dead Tuyo. Pinpoint stimulation is neither a necessity nor a drawback, but you can’t exactly get that sort of stimulation from a round toy.

Anyway, I’ve had the same Tango for quite some time. I used it fairly frequently but it would often die in between charges, an issue others seem to have had, too. I wasn’t sure it would charge at all. Indeed, I had issues aligning the magnetic charger up just right. There’s a light that would often be off when I checked, so it’s hard to determine how long it actually charged.

I grabbed it for a test, anyway, and wound up shoving it down my underwear. It fit will and was easy to maneuver, but the shape wasn’t just right. I don’t think it got me off. I got close, but it died before I could get there despite the rumbly vibrations,

And I can’t even say if it’s because it’s old and the battery is dying. Or maybe it didn’t charge all the way. Or both. I do recall it dying frequently during use, so this might be just the sale old issue that I — and everyone else — has had since day one. I’ve just forgotten about it long enough to, well, forget about it.

As I finish up my uterine shed, I’ll be trying out more of the G-spot and internal vibes in this series. Keep your eye out!

 

 

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Cloud 9 Pro Sensual Warm Touch Silicone Rechargeable Vibrator

September 1st, 2016

If there’s something I dislike more than trying really, incredibly hard and long to get off and failing to do so, it might be having to write about a toy that I would describe as “Meh.” I’m several hundred toys into my sex-toy-reviewing, er, career, and this increasingly happens despite that fact that I am now reviewing fewer toys than ever.

These two things go hand in hand, as I’ve discussed before. When I have little or nothing to say about the toy, you practically have to pry the secret from my brain via physical surgery like the mice wanted to do to Arthur Dent in H2G2. I digress just a bit.

So.. this is your introduction to the Cloud 9 Pro Sensual Warm Touch Silicone Rechargeable Vibrator, which you may never have heard of before. Even if you did, you might have forgotten about it given that the name seems more of a random assortment of words than a strong branding choice.Cloud 9 seems to be the new kid on the block, and they’ve got everything from basic

Cloud 9 seems to be the new kid on the block, and they’ve got everything from basic G-spot wands to kegel balls to heated, rechargeable vibrators. Once upon a time, this might have knocked my socks off, you know, if I even kept them on during masturbation (I am not that kind of heathen, after all). It’s still enough to draw my attention, and that’s how I wound up with this vibrator in my hands courtesy of SheVibe.

But making a rechargeable vibrator from silicone and well under the $100 price range is no longer difficult. Lovelife does it, and while their Cuddle may not heat up, it won over several reviewers/bloggers, myself included. But I digress.. again.

The Cloud 9 Pro Sensual Warm Touch Silicone Rechargeable Vibrator is one that shares similarities with many toys. The controls and heating function are similar to Svakom Leslie. The general shape reminds me of a Lelo toy, but that can be said about most toys that are trying to be – or at least look – premium.

Two-button control panel

plus, the magnetic charger reminds me of many Fun Factory toys. Cloud 9 might actually have the leg up because instead of just two contact points, there’s an ellipse groove into which the charger sits, making it more stable and providing more consistent contact during charging.

It’s not exactly like the other toys, however. While for Leslie and this sex toy take a while to warm up, The Cloud 9 vibrator does eventually become noticeably warm, warmer than Svakom’s Leslie. The description says it gets over 100 degrees F. In fact, some people might find the amount of heat to be too much. Of course, you can turn it off, but you can’t adjust it. Perhaps that will be a feature we see in similar toys in the future.

Unlike Lelo, the tip is quite squishy. The entire shaft is much squishier, actually. You might prefer this to those toys with thin layers of silicone that are mostly rigid. It may even make someone a good clitoral vibrator, but it was less than stellar for me personally.

I think I need more deep and strong vibrations or a toy with a shape that juts out in some way to be useful clitorally. This vibrator has quite buzzy vibrations that tickle my hand and leave my clit feeling a little “numb” after use — not because they’re so strong but because of how shallow they are.

I always find that toys with buzzy vibrations have lackluster modes. How can a pulsation feel good if it’s just not deep enough? This can be said for the Cloud 9 Pro Sensual Warm Touch Silicone Rechargeable Vibrator, sadly.

Overall, the Cloud 9 vibrator lacks bells and whistles. It’s got a gentle curve and is coated in soft silicone. But there’s no defined hook or bulge for G-spot stimulation. I don’t typically require texture, but I did finhas quite buzzy d the lack on this toy to be underwhelming.

This fact that it’s got 5 insertable inches and a 1.5-inch diameter kind of adds to this feeling. It’s just so.. middle of the road.

To be fair, it’s a decent, rechargeable vibrator made of soft silicone for less than $60. But unless you’re dying to try a heated toy or don’t own a single rechargeable, internal vibrator, I can’t see why anyone would rush out for one. I mean, you don’t have to. SheVibe can ship it right to your house complete with awesome box art. But I’d hate for that the be the best thing about the package you receive in the mail.

SheVibe

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Lovehoney Desire Clitoral Vibrator

May 15th, 2016

I am constantly on the hunt for the perfect clitoral vibrator. From this statement, you can infer a few things. First, that I have yet to find it. Secondly, that I have a pretty good idea what I am looking for. You’d be right. I have tried more clit vibes than many of my fellow reviewers. Some people focus on G-spot dildos or BDSM gear, but for me, the Holy Grail will always be the clitoral vibrator.

This is why I always get so excited about new clitoral toys. Because I’m looking for something that combines all my favorite toys: the right shape and the right vibes. And just because I’m on the hunt for the perfect toy doesn’t mean I haven’t enjoyed some others. In fact, the perfect clit toy, in my opinion, would be a combination of the Siri/2 and the Laya Spot, the latter being one of the first toys I ever reviewed and perhaps the only one I’ve had to replace after heavy use.

The reason I picked these two toys? I enjoy the rounded nose of the Layaspot, but it’s not as strong as I’d prefer. it’s also not made of silicone like newer Fun Factory toys. And Siri, especially the second one, has the right type of vibrations. They’re stronger and deeper than Layaspot’s AAA-powered vibes.  But it doesn’t protrude quite enough to be the perfect shape. In fact, I’ve been known to use Layaspot just for its shape alone with no vibrations at all, which is why it’s still in my Divine toy box within reach even though I’ve literally tried hundreds of other toys, including a dozen or so clit vibes, since I first got my hands on the Layaspot.

Layaspot, Desire clitoral vibe and Siri 2

Layaspot, Desire clitoral vibe and Siri 2

So my quest eventually lead me to the clitoral vibrator in Lovehoney’s Desire line of toys. This new line of toys screams “Luxury,” from its royal purple silicone housing to the storage container that comes with every toy. Yes, you read that right. The clitoral vibrator comes with a smaller version of the Lovehoney Deluxe Sex Toy Case. It might be bulky for everyday storage, but it’s more convenient and functional than Lelo boxes ever were. Sorry, my Swedish friends.

So how does the Desire clitoral vibe stand up to my two favorites?

Lovehoney’s Desire clitoral vibe is like a bigger and more exaggerated version of the Siri, so it’s more protruded. This might make it less feasible during partner sex, but that’s not what I use clitoral vibes for. As arthritis progresses in my hands, I also find that larger toys are a little easier on my hands.

I enjoy the purple but there’s this shiny, hard plastic spot that looks like it should be  a touch pad a la the Better Than Chocolate, but it’s not.

It’s also rechargeable (via USB) and fully waterproof, which the Layaspot isn’t. The buttons, there are three, are easy to use. Turn it on and increase power. Swap through modes. Decrease power and turn it off. Plus, you can lock the thing.

While presentation and design might be pretty impressive, it falls short on the one thing that really matters: vibrations. They’re both more buzzy and weak than I would like. While this might not be a problem for many people, it is for me. There might be 8 vibration options, but none of them were quite good enough.

I’ve tried to give it a fair shake. I’ve used it multiple times, and I have been able to achieve orgasm. But it’s not an experience that I like. It takes longer and more effort than I want. When I use sex toys, I do it get off impressively and quickly. Plus, I’m not much into clitoral teasing.

This is a bummer because I know that toys of a smaller stature can be stronger. Siri 2 is. And the motor for the Ooh by Je Joue line is impressively strong despite its small size (in fact, I bought the clitoral attachment — the first sex toy I’ve bought myself in years). I also really wanted to love this and use it to give other Lovehoney Desire pieces a try. However, I’m more reluctant since trying this one.

I seem to be in the minority with my criticisms, though. It’s got more than 4 stars on the Lovehoney site, and mine is one of only two 3-star reviews, the lowest on the product page. However, the other critical review also labels buzzy vibrations as an issue despite others calling it “powerful.”

If you don’t require rumbly vibrations in your sex toys, you might love the Lovehoney Desire clit vibrator. There certainly is a lot to like. Unfortunately, that just makes it all the more frustrating for me that I don’t.

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Lelo Lily 2

February 27th, 2016

Lily 2
$139 from Lelo

The original Lily was one of the most disappointing vibrators I’ve ever tried to get off with. This is twofold. One, it was one of the first — if not the very first — expensive vibrator that I bought for myself (perhaps even a Christmas gift?) and it was something I’d lusted over for, perhaps, years.

When I got the thing, it was sleek. I was probably still impressed with Lelo’s packaging at the time, which has thankfully been updated to something less bulky and more eco-friendly, but I still didn’t keep it. The problems with Lily were obvious from the start. The two buttons are placed on the underside of the toy, the side that will rest against your mons during masturbation and sex. And the vibrators? I’d be better off humping a wall while my asshole neighbors throw a party.

Lelo decided to fix exactly one of those problems — the vibrations — by using a better motor this go around. And it’s high time! It’s been something like 6 or 7 years since I first tried Lily. The new Lily feels at least twice as strong but, and perhaps more importantly, the vibrations feel deeper than I remember the original being.

They’ve done nothing for the horrendous placement of the buttons, however. The company has also added a unique feature that exactly zero people were clamoring for (and that pretty much everyone has laughed at): the Lily 2 is now scented.

But I’m curious or brave or simply amused, and I signed myself right up to review the Lily 2.

All things considered, it wasn’t nearly as disappointing at the original Lily. The vibrations on high are comparable to the highest setting or the first Siri; although, the vibrations start much weaker and are generally buzzier. I don’t love it as much as either of my Siris, which are solid little clitoral vibrators that show Lelo really can do something right, but the power boost means I can get off with Lily 2… as long as I turn it up high and leave it in place because those damned buttons are really in the worst possible place. Guys, everyone gives Jimmyjane crap for the form 6 but this is so.much.worse.

But the vibrations — all 8 settings are steady vibration — are decent if a bit boring. I’ve never been on to enjoy all those extra settings, though, so this isn’t a dealbreaker for me, personally. I was able to get off while applying a fair amount of pressure. The flatness of the Lily 2 isn’t exactly ideal for honing in on that spot between labia like some other toys, including Siri and Eva, which I will be writing a review for here soon.

As far as the one feature that Lelo has been touting.. I don’t hate it, honestly. I carefully chose the dark plum colored Lily 2, which is Chocolat & Bordeau scented.  I don’t like the smell of wine or how chocolate scented things usually smell, but I more passionately dislike floral scents, so this seemed the best option. I’m not sure that it smells exactly like the name suggests, but it’s honestly not that bad. It’s quite faint, so you have to hold it to your nose to smell it. I don’t even smell it when using it, and that’s kind of the conundrum here. I’m not offended, but it literally adds nothing to the experience, unless maybe you’re using it on someone else and your face is close to the thing.

I think you can see why this marketing angle makes no sense. What Lelo should be playing up is the increased strength and the fact that Lily is now waterproof because people seem to care about that… for reasons that escape me. Especially considering how difficult it is for people to understand the concept of adding scent to a vibrator and whether that it good for us or not. Personally, I don’t feel like it’s a con, but it’s not exactly a pro, either.

Lily 2 far more of a success than its predecessor simply because of its improved vibrations, but for $20 more, you can get a fantastic experience from the Siri 2. Or you could opt for the unique features of Ora 1 & 2, which aren’t up everyone’s alley. But at least the feature is noticeable even if you don’t like it? I don’t know. I did.

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Ooh by Je Joue What Happens In Vegas Kit

December 31st, 2015

More often than not, when a company tries to do something new, I am not impressed. Especially when the resulting product is trying to do too many things at once. There’s a reason why rabbit vibes are either loved or hated: it’s really difficult to do multiple things right simultaneously.

I’ve also had a luke-warm relationship with JeJoue in the past. The only thing I’ve really liked from this company is Sasi, which is now discontinued, and mine never quite worked right, anyway.

So I cannot begin to express how excited I am that JeJoue has finally mastered the dual-purpose motor/vibrator attachment toys in a way that every.other.company has thus far managed to fuck up. You’re probably not surprised if you read this Facebook update.

I have never liked inserting the tiny bullets into Tantus dildos. I didn’t have any interest in the Rocks of bullet and compatible attachments. Fun Factory has a rechargeable bullet that I might like, but I’m hesitant to try. I turned up my nose at We-Vibe’s pleasure mates. So I’m not exactly sure what made me decide to ask for the Ooh by Je Joue What Happens In Vegas Kit from SheVibe, but I am glad.

Let me say, though, this naming sucks. It’s long and bulky and confusing. But that’s totally irrelevant in the grand scheme of things.

So this kit is two attachments — cock ring and insertable vibrator — along with a motor that can be used with either. It can also be used with a clitoral attachment called the Pebble, which even comes in bright yellow! You don’t get to choose colors in the kits, though, but you do get to choose which toys you’d like. There’s a kit with the internal and clitoral vibrator attachments, or you can get the cock ring and the clitoral attachment in a kit together. Each of the attachments can be purchased separately from SheVibe, but you’ll need a kit to get the first motor.

Ooh by Je Joue What Happens In Vegas Kit motor

Tiny motor!

The tiny motor — and you wouldn’t believe how small it is — easily clicks into place into each of the attachments. It can go in either way; there is a button on either side that corresponds to an indent in the silicone that you press to operate it. The button is the only thing I don’t really love. It’s indented, which makes it hard to get at with fingernails. This won’t be an issue for anyone, but a convex button would be the better option.

It’s easy to use the toys, and the vibration settings are pretty standard: high, medium and low steady vibrations; a pitter-patter pulsation that is super interesting and a regular pulsation. Could it be, for the first time in history, that Adriana likes a setting that’s not steady vibration? Maybe! You simply click the button to move between the settings or hold it for a few seconds to power on and off.

When it’s time to swap the attachments, there are handy arrows etched into the silicone. When you squeeze here, the motor is ejected easily. It’s super clever and works so well. I tend to bend and pull vibrators toward me during using, and the classic vibrator in this kit took it like a champ, and the motor remained securely in place.

Inside the attachments and arrow for ejecting the motor.

Inside the attachments and arrow for ejecting the motor.

I haven’t had a chance to use the cock ring with a partner, but it’s incredibly stretchy. Because there’s no rigid casing, the vibrations travel a bit better through the material. But the motor is heavier than other vibrators, and I feel as though this could potentially get a little uncomfortable. But if you keep the motor side up, it can stimulate your clitoris while the ring is wrapped around your partner’s penis.

Because the charging port is actually inside the toys when you use them, it’s fully encases in silicone and waterproof. There’s a little flap over the charging port. And you guys won’t believe this: it charges through standard Micro-USB! This is the same charger as your Android devices use. Words cannot describe how excited I am over this.

What really has me thrilled is how this tiny motor manages to vibrate so deeply. If Je Joue can do it, why can’t other companies? Why do so many clitoral vibrators suck? Why has it taken sex toy companies so long to please me in such a way? Why, God, why?

Melodrama aside, this is a fantastic toy. The classic vibrator attachment isn’t huge, but it flares out and there’s a rigidity that makes it work quite well for G-spotting, even though it’s not all that curved. Je Joue will soon be offering a G-spot vibrator attachment specifically, a “Flexi G-spot” vibrator, which bends — probably similar to Je Joue’s Uma — and a few plug options.

The more I discover about these kits, the more I like it. There’s quite a few other shapes that will soon be available. There will also be a mini motor. It’s hard to imagine a motor that’s any smaller than the one that came in my kit, which is technically a large, but this will work with a smaller cock ring and a mini Pebble attachment. I suspect this motor would be less powerful and more buzzy, and I’m quite happy with the size of the motor that came in the What Happens in Vegas Kit.

There’s a bit more to know about these kits and the options available to you before you make a purchase. But I suspect Je Joue will be making many consumers happy with the ability to mix and max shapes and motors to create your perfect sex toy collection.

SheVibe

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