Satisfyer (Pro 2, 2, Pro Penguin) Comparison Review

June 27th, 2017

I’m a little late on this whole pulsating-air-clitoral-stimulator craze. To be honest, I wasn’t super interested. I’m not typically a direct clit stim girl, usually preferring a broader/rounder sort of stimulation on my entire vulva. And the toy that came out first, well, it has a terrible name (Womanizer).

But when the Satisfyer company contacted me about a review, I said “Sure.” I didn’t expect much, to be honest. So when three different models (Satisfyer Pro 2, Satisfyer Penguin and Satisfyer 2) showed up, I was pretty excited at having the chance to compare them. And when I realized that I didn’t really know how they worked, so I quickly stuck my fingers in the holes to see.

Oh.em.gee.

The sucking mechanism (or pressure wave, if you will) of the Satisfyer toys immediately seemed like something that would feel good. Amazing. God-like.

And maybe it is — just not for me. In order to enjoy any of the Satisfyer toys, you should probably enjoy direct clitoral stimulation. As I mentioned above and in a plethora of reviews, I am not that sort of person. Ultimately, I wound up feeling aroused, adjusting to the suction, turning each toy all the way up and.. waiting. Before awkwardly grinding against the body of the toy to get off.

Suction alone just isn’t enough to get me off. I don’t think this concept marries well with my style of masturbating.

But let’s back up.

All the Satisfiers are devices with hard plastic shells. There’s something of a nozzle on the head, into which a silicone piece slips. This leaves a hole that you place over your clitoris, or potentially nipple, and suction comes from within the device in steady pulses. This direct stimulation is going to be too much for some people to handle, and there’s not really a way to dial it back like you might by using a vibratnig through underwear or clothing. All three toys are waterproof, but I don’t use toys in water.

Satisfyer 2

Satisfyer 2, cousin to a thermometer?

The Satisfyer 2 is, by far, the most medicinal-looking of the models. Someone might easily mistake one of these toys for an ear thermometer if they saw it sitting in your bathroom and didn’t actually handle it. You might think this makes it the least sexy of all the Satisfyer devices, but I actually think this title should be left to the Satisfyer Pro Penguin because its animal shape make me feel.. weird.

satisfyer pro penguin

Never before have animal shapes bothered me on a sex toy

This model is definitely longer and wider (at the head) than either the Pro Penguin or Satisfyer Pro 2. The Pro 2 is definitely the newer, streamlined option. It’s less boxy and more ergonomic – and the gold-and-white color scheme is inverted. A note on the Satisyer Pro 2: there are two different versions available under the same name. If yours has the embossed name on the handle, it’s the newer model that also happens to be quieter than the old version.

If you use either the Satisfyer 2 or Pro 2, you can aim the handle toward your belly button to reach the buttons, which are on top. However, that placement feels awkward for me. I’ve rarely had a clitoral toy where this wasn’t the case, though. The Penguin is curvy and smaller, nearly fitting in my hand. If I turn it handle-up, I can use my thumb to reach the buttons that are technically on the underside of the toy, and this is the most comfortable usage for me. I might be alone in this.

Satisfyer 2 alone has three buttons: power, plus, and minus. The others simply have two, which I prefer, one for on/off and one for cycling through the settings. The Satysfier Pro 2’s buttons make quite the loud clicking noise in use.

satisfyer pro 2

Satisfyer Pro 2 has a curvier design and more plush nozzle

Each has a removable silicone head for ease of cleaning (you’re still going to want to wipe down the exterior and inner hole of the plastic, however). The silicone nozzle on the Satisfyer 2 is in between the Penguin and Satisfyer Pro 2 in terms of which. The Pro 2 is quite thick and wide like a donut. The Penguin has the thinnest and smallest nozzle. But the inner tubes are actually sized opposite, with the Penguin having the largest circumference, the Satisfyer 2 in the middle, and the Satisfier Pro 2 having the snuggest fit.

Nozzles of the Satisfyer Pro 2, 2 and Pro Penguins

Nozzles of the Satisfyer Pro 2, 2 and Pro Penguins

The last way that the older Satisfyer model differs is in noise. It’s much louder than the other two, sounding akin to a small kitchen appliance. I think the Penguin is the quietest of the two, but the difference between it and the Satisfyer Pro 2 is less than the difference between either of those two and the Satisfyer 2.

The Satisfyer 2 is the only model that I received to try that ran on batteries — 2 AAAs. So it took a while for me to try it out because, apparently, it’s too much work to grab my already-charged batteries and insert them. Fortunately, the Satisfyer 2 works with rechargeables.

While I am not usually a fan of something that runs on AAAs, it seems like the suction mechanism of the Satisfyer toys isn’t decreased nearly as much vibrations do on a battery-operated toy. In fact, I think the Satisfyer 2 might be stronger than the Satisfyer Pro Penguin, and the motor does have the highest decibel rating of all the Satisfyer models, but it’s harder for me to discern power level between the toys and even between the levels on a single toy.

The Satisfyer comes with 11 levels, but I can’t really tell the difference. I can only confirm this by turning it all the way up and then backing down level by level. But to my clit or nipple, it’s not a huge difference. Once I get past the fourth level or so, they all feel pretty much the same. I think this is because the frequency of the suction has increased so much that it’s hard to differentiate between each pulse. As you can guess, I’m not thoroughly impressed by the different levels on the Satisfyer toys, and that’s how I feel about vibrators, too. 3-5 more distinct levels would be the better option here.

Although telling apart the toys via suction levels is difficult, it’s easier based on the way the size and shape of the silicone compartment feels. The silicone head of the Satisfyer Pro 2 is squishier, but the tube is also a tighter fit, making it easy to tell when it’s in place. The thinner silicone of the Penguin means you can more easily feel the rigid plastic behind it, but you can definitely feel that the inner chamber is wider. I think I like the shape and size of the silicone head of the Satisfyer 2 the best because it lands squarely in the middle in terms of squishiness and snugness.

But even having tried these three toys leaves me somewhat at a loss for words when it comes to recommending them. If you’ve never tried anything like the Satisfyer, I’m not sure how to compare it. I know you should like direct clitoral stimulation.

Nevertheless, it’s hard to recommend one of the specific models. The Satisfyer 2 and Penguin feel pretty similar suction-wise. If you were really opposed to batteries, I’d recommend the Penguin. It also feels the best in my hand.

It’s pretty difficult to recommend a toy based on head size/shape/angle, though. I think you just need to try them (I did, and I’m not sure if there’s one that I prefer). Unfortunately, Satisfyer doesn’t make their toys with multiple-sized heads like the competition, so I’d advise checking them out if you’re curious about size.

Satisfyer models are cheaper than the Womanizer, so it might be a safer bet if you’re not sure about the concept.

Dangerous Lilly has a fantastic comparison chart and write-up of the different Satisfyer and Womanizer models (which I have yet to try) on her blog. She also has photos of the various heads, which you’ll find helpful. We both seem to enjoy the Satisfyer 2 for what it’s worth.

I’m not sure I’ve ever come across a toy that was so difficult to recommend based on either experience or specs. That’s probably why so many people seem to have tried these or similar toys.

If you want to try any of the Satisfyers, you probably won’t find them from the same retailer. The Satisfyer Pro 2 is on sale for $69.99 from Shevibe. Otherwise, you can pick up the Satisfyer 2 and Satisfyer Pro Penguin from the Of Sex and Love Store for $49 and $66, respectively.

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Attention Catchers #3: Vortex Vibrations

June 24th, 2009

Vortex Vibrations

Vortex Vibrations is not a sex toy in and of itself. However, it is an attachment for your vacuum which turns it into a sex toy. That alone is something that makes me say “Huh?” because, really, I never looked upon my vacuum in a sexual way. So it’s really just curiosity which piques my interest. Of course, the website is full of claims about how this is basically a miracle sex toy and I’m always looking to debunk insane advertisements like that but it would be pretty cool if something so ordinary as a vacuum was the key to unlocking sexual pleasure for every woman, right?

Unfortunately, I’ve never heard of this toy before and it doesn’t seem to be carried with a lot of retailers, neither of which supports the claims that be redirecting suction in such a way, this toy is a sure thing. But maybe it’s just not well known.

One website which sells this toy describes using it to arouse the clitoris via suction and then adjust the slider so the “clitoris itself starts to vibrate, fluttering like a reed in a saxophone”. That does sound impressive.

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Pink Pussy Pump

May 23rd, 2009

Although I was initially a bit put off by the strange looks of the Pink Pussy Pump, I was soon pleasantly surprised by the unique sensations provided by an actually effective suction system.

At first, I was taken aback by the size of the suction cup. I was expecting something a little smaller, for focus on clitoral suction. Rather, the cup provides suction stimulation to the entire vulva – or pussy – region. Furthermore, the cup is made of a hard pink plastic, which did prove to get the job done, but also threw me off. The hard plastic seemed to be a bit institutional or medicinal – at least, as medicinal as pink plastic can be. There’s not much to the rest of the apparatus: just a springy hose and a rubber, bulb-shaped pump. Overall, this is not a sexy looking sex toy and that was disappointing to my sense of aesthetic. Luckily, a toy does not need to be sexy itself to work well.

The pussy pump, which comes in a fairly cute, 70s inspired pink and purple box, fits easily over my lips. I have to agree that it is ergonomically correct; the edges of the cup are slightly curved instead of flat. Although the cup isn’t exactly small, it was small enough to move higher or lower and I think it would be wearable during sex as long as it’s not too rough or the cup isn’t bumped. I was able to insert a rather large toy and thrust without dislodging the cup.

Suction wise, I was impressed. The Pinky Pussy Pump provided much more suction than the last flimsy toy I tried. I applied it to a bare thigh first, just to experiment and the suction on the first pump was amazing.The icnrease n successive pumps was also impressive and the effect on my skin was visible. Applied to my vulva, I felt a satisfying pressure/tug on the general area which, while including my clit, wasn’t focused on it.

At first, my squeezes on the bulb pump, which is textured and easy to grip, were rather large but I was able to experiment a bit and I could easily adjust the level of pressure in fairly small increments. If the pressure is too much, you need to take off the pump quickly or you’re simply done playing, there is an easy to use quick-release button between the hose and pump. I wound the woosh of air to my pussy to feel really exciting. I wasn’t able to release the pressure in increments as small as I could increase it but, with focus, could release pressure in several small increments.

While this sensation alone wasn’t enough to get me off. It was quite arousing and would be a nice companion during sex or masturbation. I think sex would work a little better because the cup did get in the way a bit with toy use. The toy also aims to increase the size of your lips but, honestly, I didn’t really notice. However, I wasn’t as concerned because it was pleasurable.

Despite the fact that the suction was impressive, it was fairly easy to break the seal by slipping a finger under one edge of simply pulling the cup off my skin (and, y’know, when my cat jumped on me LOL). Neither of these things hurt, either. It also didn’t tug on any of my hair but it’s fairly short right now (maybe 1/2″).

One of the features of the Pink Pussy Pump is that you can remove the hose and pump without loosing suction. I’m not sure why anyone would do this. I wasn’t eager to do jumping jacks or the dishes or anything so I don’t see the need. Still, I tried it out and I was able to successfully remove the house where it connects via a metal fastener type thing. This is also how I disconnected the hose to wash the cup before and after use. Without the hose, the cup is simple an easy to clean, hard plastic piece.

I found the Pink Pussy Pump to be more stimulating than I thought it would be and can see it being used during partner or solo play. The stretchy hose was adequate length for me to use on myself and a partner could easily hold the reins as well, adding another aspect to your play. I would recommend this to anyone looking for suction in their sex lives.

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