Comments on: When What We Want is Not What We Need: The Happiness Version

By: Micah Moore

Micah Moore — Fri, 10 Dec 2010 06:46:25 +0000

While I completely agree
that you have to first be happy and confident with yourself, to be truly happy in a relationship, that will only get you so far.
(and thats enough)
However one of the problems is that women often seek a quick fix looking for that fullfillment with the wrong person…
this makes it even harder for their friends to convince them that 1.not only is the dude a douchebag, but 2.its a deeper issue than that.
I think the main thing people NEED in a relationship to be happy (after they are healthy/happy themselves)
is a partner who is compatible, and is consciously present.
I think true love is a conscious act…
that requires a presence in the moment with your lover.
The “its happening to me out of control feeling” is the passion/intensity that can be a catalyst to intimacy, but after it fades its the commitment to
the moments with the person that keep it alive.
Good luck to her and all of us.
We all deserve love.
-Micah

By: Adriana

Adriana — Sat, 17 Jul 2010 14:11:16 +0000

In reply to Polly Vincere. It's usually easier said than done. C'est la vie. d=

By: Polly Vincere

Polly Vincere — Sat, 17 Jul 2010 13:26:35 +0000

It’s wonderful that you recognize the source of your own happiness & that you shared that information with your friend. Some day when the light clicks on for her, she’ll likely thank you.

This is similar to when people say “s/he made me feel bad.” I try to constantly remember that only I get to choose the way I feel, so people can’t hurt me if I don’t let them. Sometimes that’s not as easy to do as to say.

By: Adriana

Adriana — Wed, 23 Jun 2010 04:05:13 +0000

In reply to Britni TheVadgeWig. It kills me that some people never DO learn that lesson.

By: Britni TheVadgeWig

Britni TheVadgeWig — Tue, 22 Jun 2010 13:37:26 +0000

That’s a hard lesson to learn, and one that many people never do; happiness needs to come from inside, and not from external forces. People and things don’t make us happy. Only we can do that.

By: What We Want Is Not Always What We Need « Juliettia

What We Want Is Not Always What We Need « Juliettia — Tue, 22 Jun 2010 04:34:56 +0000

[…] manages to write posts that I want to put a big thumbs up on. Her latest post is titled, “What we want is not always what we need; the happiness version“. Here is a little taste of what it’s about. Anyone reading this now should go and read […]

By: Juliettia

Juliettia — Tue, 22 Jun 2010 03:43:56 +0000

This is something that I’ve stated numerous times to people when I was in high school yet no one could seem to understand that your happiness didn’t come from XYZ, but from yourself first and is perhaps enhanced by the later.