How to Survive International Sex Toy Shipping

April 23rd, 2014

If there’s one thing that makes being a reviewer slightly less than awesome, it’s mail. I live in a locked building and often miss carriers. However, the worst-case scenario is that a package is sent back. Once or twice, I’d had to pick one up at the carrier’s office. This is nothing compared to some of the horror stories I’ve heard about people using international shipping but retailers like CherryAffairs try to make it easy for shoppers. Make sex toy shopping less stressful with these tips.

FedEx Express Airbus A300 Jager

Know the rules of each retailer and delivery service to make shipping less stressful

  • Know your country’s tariffs. More than once, a blogger or sex toy reviewer friend has been contacted by their national postal service or a delivery service such as UPS and had to pay tariffs or fees for their bundle of BDSM gear. This is especially true for Canadians. If you’re ordering from another company and the item is of low value, you could be paying a fee that’s actually more than the value of what you’re buying, which means that it might be smarter to make large purchases and pay a single duty rather than making smaller purchases.
  • Make it worth your money. Many retailers offer free shipping over a certain amount — $50, $75 or $99 are common. Stock up and pay a single shipping fee rather than ordering every vibrator separately.
  • Find local retailers — and I don’t just mean those that are in town. Sometimes you might not have that option, but if you look for a company that’s located within your own country, you can avoid high tariffs and long shipping periods. Canada and the UK both offer several options. However, just because you’re in an area where sex toys are less common doesn’t mean you don’t have the right to get off. In Singapore, for example, you can shop for sex toys online at CherryAffairs and have vibrators, dildos and BDSM gear delivered right to your door no matter where you are.
  • Get a P.O. box. A box at your post office can solve a lot of problems — like snooping parents, thieving neighbors and a work schedule that doesn’t allow you to get to the door. If there’s no locked mailbox large enough for packages containing sex toys, a P.O. box is useful. Plus, you can rent them for temporary periods. However, there’s a downside. Not every sex toy retailer will ship to P.O. boxes. Make sure to verify shipping policies before deciding if this is the way to go for you.
  • Plan ahead. Whether you’re vacationing in Singapore or you just won’t be home for the day because of work, make sure to get your ducks in a row. Ask someone who won’t snoop though a box of dildos to get your mail, notify the shipping service to bring a package to work or have the post office hold your parcel until you can pick it up.
  • Purchase insurance or tracking. I always feel best when a package is safe in my hands. Second-best, however, is when I can track every move it makes. It’s a little more difficult when it comes to shipping from overseas, but a tracking number goes a long way (almost as long as a package coming from Asia!). CherryAffairs offers tracking for all overseas packages and an option for local customers to upgrade to registered shipping  to get a tracking number along with piece of mind.You can also sign up to get text or email alerts from most delivery services so you never lose a sex toy in transit.
  • Do your research. Finally, you’ll want to make sure that you’re aware of a company’s return policy. If you miss UPS three days in a row or your package gets stuck in customs, what happens then? Will the sex toy retailer try to ship it again, or will you simply get a refund? Will you have to pay for additional shipping? It also helps to check out customer service. Does a sex toy store have a number for international consumers? Can you contact them via email or even WhatsApp — CherryAffairs offers this — if that’s more convenient?

When you’d looking at high fees, missed packages and stolen goods, a discreet package is the least of your worries. Many of these tips will also help people ordering adult toys within their own countries who have experienced frustrations.

Do you have a sex toy shipping story that’s funny or terrible? Let me know!

 This post brought to you by CherryAffairs, Singapore’s leader in adult novelties, vibrators, couple’s toys and more. Cherry Affairs promises discreet and expedient shipping the world over. Check out the CherryAffairs Facebook page for more information.

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Categories: Articles

Public Service Announcement: Banner Sizes

August 7th, 2010

Today’s public service announcement is brought to you by Of Sex and Love and sponsored by the letter “Y” as in “You’re doing it wrong.”

For starters. Affiliate program managers, sit down. Let’s have a talk. Affiliate programs are great. I help you make money, I make money. Simple concept. In fact, it’s one that I personally love. You know what I don’t love? When I log into an affiliate account to get some banners and none of the banners are standard size.

Maybe you’re not familiar with the fact that there are, indeed, standard sizes. (I say, maybe you ought to step down from your position as an affiliate program manager). Now, I recognize that standards do vary but even if you stick to the oldest possible list of standard banner sizes–like the ones on this page–you’re not going to go wrong. I personally am a fan of 468×60 and the skyscrapers. I recognize that a lot of smaller banners have become popular, too. In fact, I use a couple 120×60 buttons as you can see exemplified on this page. Now, if you’re feeling extremely varied at the moment, you could even use some of the unique-yet-still-mostly-standard sizes from this page.

Isn’t it amazing how many standard sizes there are? Isn’t it awesome that these standards exist so that the highest number of people/websites can use your banners? Isn’t it ridiculous if you cannot, somehow, manage to use any of those standard sizes?

I mean, my site uses no less than 4 standard banner sizes. And if I cannot find a single banner on your site that fits in one of my allotted banner spaces, I’m not going to bother.

Let me reiterate: I’d rather lose potential money and risk our working relationship that put up banners of mismatched sizes.

Pretty strong argument, I know. That’s how I roll. I recognize that I am in the minority. A lot of my peers will use banners of any old size. It makes me sad. They shouldn’t have to. You should do your job.

Making the internet look like shit–you’re doing it right.

I mean, maximizing your publicity and revenue–you’re doing it wrong.

But you’re not the only one doing it wrong. It has recently come to my attention that it is summer in some parts of the world. I got the memo one day when I walked outside and died. Since then, I have done my best to stay in side and whisper sweet nothings to my air conditioner, you know, so it doesn’t get angry and walk out on me. This is all just a long-winded way to say summer is hot!

I learned this last summer, also, when I requested to view a massage candle and it arrived as massage soup. Awesome! I contacted the review program personnel and didn’t have to review it; the store actually said they would be taking that product off the market during the summer months. A smart decision, thought I. But it’s summer again and people are getting all sorts of melty surprised in the mail and that’s kind of lame. I’m not sure that any location is really much better when it comes to heat and melting products. After all, it gets pretty hot in those delivery trucks. I mean, I got my pinwheel the other day and damned near burned myself on it.

This “You’re doing it wrong” award goes to everyone: consumers, retailers and manufacturers. As consumers, we should be smarter about this sort of thing. Retailers (including review program personnel) should, as well. I don’t expect anyone to remove all their melty stock for half the year but maybe you could just toss up a warning on the site that the stuff doesn’t travel well? And manufacturers. Oh, manufacturers. You could probably save us all the hassle if you just securely sealed your melty products. In fact, some manufacturers do!

When I got my JimmyJane Afterglow candle, it was sealed. Although it had been packaged on its side and had melted off to the side, it stayed in the container. Sure, I had to dig out the wick to burn it but I didn’t lose half the product. But if you’re tossing an open candle holder into a shipping container or pressing wax into a cardboard box and shipping it across the country, you’re asking for trouble. Come to think of it, you’re probably losing money, too.

Forethought–we’re all doing it wrong.

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Categories: Everything Else

Kookie Riding Crop

November 17th, 2009

Kookie Riding Crop

Kookie Riding Crop
$24 from Babeland

Riding crops are sleek. I’ve never been an equestrian but so are horses. I suppose someone thought the same thing about humans to adapt the tool.. Or maybe not. Just a conjecture.

I do know a bit more about playing with riding cops after playing with my very first one, the Kookie Riding Crop from Babeland. I know that the Kookie Crop is made of a handle attached to a nylon-covered shaft which is then secure to a piece of folded-over leather to make the tongue. The handle is made of a firm plastic or silicone piece which is textured and has a lightly engraved diamond pattern which makes it easy to hold even under slipper circumstances. The braided cover of the rod is secure and neat and the leather of the tongue is thin, unfinished on the inside (although, I’m not sure why anyone would be feeling it other than for review purposes) and sewn in an arc around the shaft with contrasting thread. At its widest, it’s only 1.5″ wide and the thin “neck” of that piece is then further secured by a thin piece of string which is wrapped countless times around the tongue and shaft. It seems like the string was then treated with something to make it quite hard and firm. Overall, the quality is decent. For only, $18, this seem to be a good starter crop that will like a while, if not forever.

I was a bit surprised at the overall length of this crop, admittedly. I expected something a bit longer and a quick glance at a variety of crops shows that many are in the 24″-25″ range. However, the Kookie Crop is not far off at 18.5″ in length. I do think the slightly shorter shaft makes it a bit less flexible than other crops. I’m not positive because I’m quite the amateur in this; it just seems like a longer shaft would allow for a bit more flexibility but it could just seem that way. Either way, the tongue can be pulled back about 30 degrees – which seems to be a good amount of flexibility without becoming floppy – and then released to flick. That flick is definitely noticeable but, because of the length, this method seems to work better, the closer I am to the target and it certainly cannot be used too far away because the crop simply won’t reach.

Of course, I was surprised at other methods this toy can be used. The generic method is to simply flick a wrist at arm’s length but my pathetically weak wrists couldn’t deliver a blow nearly as powerful as using my whole arm. This was the method I had to use to get a good feel of the crop when using it on myself. I guess that’s good news for those solo BDSMers; you can easily bend yourself over and swing away. My experience was that swings focusing more on the leather-only part of the tongue were less intense than swings which involve the end of the shaft.

I was actually quite surprised at the range of sensation provided by the Kookie Riding Crop when used in the traditional manner. It can be used to simply tap, not cause any pain at all. Even my medium to strong strikes were bearable (at least on my ass), the marks outlasting the pain by far. The feeling would be more intense on more sensitive parts, of course, but it could be used comfortably on the vulva area, I think. I found the aftermath provided a sort of warmth and hypersensitivity to the area struck. Actually, I might be more of a masochist than I knew because that feeling is great! The feel of the strike itself feels much like a slap and stings like one as well.

Alternatively, one could focus on using just the edge of the tongue with a quick back and forth motion which feels more like frictional (I had to look up that adjective; wouldn’t frictious sound better?) rubbing. It’s not quite intense and becomes like an uncomfortable chafing after prolonged exposure. Lastly, the handle can be used for impact, like sort of a makeshift cane. The blows from the handle definitely feel heavier. I suppose that is what it meant when one describes “thuddy” impacts. I imagine this method would more quickly result in bruises and it’s the type of pain I definitely do not like in any sense; although, some surely do.

Of course, the stiff leather tongue wasn’t nearly as fun to run over the skin for general sensation play. Other toys with suede, premium leather or even fur are better for that. The handle could be used for penetration but it’s thin enough that it would leave me unimpressed unless there was a specific goal that I am not creatively enough endowed to think of.

When it comes to wielding a crop, I was definitely impressed. This lightweight instrument is so completely easy to use and really isn’t taxing at all. I completely understand the description on the product page when it says it “will have you betting to see which lasts longer–your arm or their ass.” I also love the slapping sound which makes it fun for striking all sorts of things when a partner is blindfolded to make them jump. There’s lots of potential for mind fuckery. It’s a treat for the eyes as well, leaving quite the skin bright red without much effort at all.

Overall, the Kookie Riding Crop is a steal. It does what it advertises well but doesn’t do much more. I’m not sure why Babeland needs to ship it in a giant, 3″ long prism box, however. It dwarfed the lonely crop inside (which I do not believe was further packaged, nor did it have any tags/info) and I’m sure there are smaller, less wasteful ways to send it – like a poster tube, perhaps.

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Categories: BDSM, Reviews

Image © MisterUnlucky; used with permission.