Maia Astral D3 Dong

May 12th, 2013

I’m still not sure about the naming over at Maia toys. I think perhaps something more memorable would help them out, and I kind of hate the word “dong.” But who doesn’t?

So this is the only dildo I was able to review for the company, but it’s also my favorite of the items that they sent me. The blue, or astral, is a medium sky blue. I also had a medium lavender, which I donated to a friend in need. For some reason, the box photos show a rather shiny finish, but this isn’t the case. This dildo has a satiny smooth exterior, which feels just great in my hand. It also picks up lint, but man does it feel good when I grasp it.

The shape is a bit more difficult to describe. It looks “twisted” but this dildo actually has ridges. If you’re looking at it from the side, they angle downward. There are four ridges, and while each is wide, they’re not that far off the shaft. However, you can still feel them quite well. If the contoured head, which reminds me of a number of Tantus dildos, isn’t enough to stimulated the G-spot or whichever spot you’re aiming for, the ridges will.

There is the slightest — and I mean slightest — G-spot curve. I find that the head works well enough for me, and the combination of the ridges and head should work well for most people. However, I can’t guarantee it. This thing is almost seamless. It’s super smooth, which is awesome.

The area around those ridges is the most dense of the entire toy. There’s some give but its mostly around the thinner part of the toy, above and below the area where the shaft is. All in all, I thought I wouldn’t like the size + shape + firmness, but I kind of fucking love it. It’s simple yet effective. It doesn’t require much from me, that’s awesome stuff, man.

IMAG0455To give you a better idea of size, we’re talking about 7.25 insertable inches, with a bit more length thanks to the suction cup, which sucks a lot.. in a good way. The widest part of the head has a diameter of 2 inches, but it’s oblong and narrower when you turn the dildo. Around the widest ridge, we’re talking about 1.9″. This dildo is on the larger end, and while it’s not the biggest toy you could ever play with, it’s certainly filling. The valleys on the shaft are probably 1.65″ wide or so, while it narrows to about 1.5 inches right below the head. This might not the dildo for the feint of heart or newbies.

It’s definitely the right toy for someone who likes bright colors, filling sensation and the ability to use it on a hard surface. Hey, that isn’t my thing, but there’s no judging thing. I find the suction cup provides an interesting hand hold that’s squishy and easy on the write. I like this, because the size makes it a little on the heftier side.

No matter how you use this one, you’ll need to wash it wish soap and water to rinse off any pesky dirt, lint or, as in my case, cat fur. Like every other Maia toy, this comes with a storage bag. It’s bright blue, to match the dildo, and soft and stretchy. Of course, you could store this with like material without worrying about reactions, but you’ll want to avoid silicone lube reactions if you like it.

I’ve seen this ranging from $27 to $35, and that’s a fucking awesome price. Plus, it comes in that windowed box. I like those. You know what? Go buy it, now.

3 Comments


Le Reve Rechargeable

May 6th, 2013

I have such a love-hate relationship with rechargeable vibes. I mean, you don’t have to buy batteries, which is awesome. Some of them are super strong – -also awesome. Being able to reach for a vibe and have it ready to go it great, but if you don’t use them frequently enough, they might die. Plus, when a rechargeable vibe does, you have to give it time to charge. you can’t just pop in new batteries.

Most of those things are fairly insignificant, and I’d be willing to overlook them if the vibrator gets me off and feels fantastic, but I just never know what to expect. This was the case with the Le Reve Rechargeable. It’s cute, but would it be strong? The answer to that question is ‘No.” Sad.

Let’s get this out of the way: this toy has the very sort of vibrations that I do not like. No, it’s not even an issue of liking it. They just don’t work for me. I need something more than weak and buzzy, but that’s all that this one offers. It’s a shame because I feel as though Pipedream is marketing this line as higher quality than other products. Fortunately, you can find it on Amazon for less than $30. So if you happened upon this vibe there, you wouldn’t feel quite so disappointed if it didn’t work for you.

The one thing that I noticed about this almost immediately was how similar it looks to this little mouse-shaped laser cat toy I have. The vibrator is the bigger toy — heh heh — but it’s got a similar shape.

IMAG0680-1

Just add a little mouse face and, bam!, same thing.. sorta. This shouldn’t bother me, but it kinda does. The shape tapers, so it’s all about pinpoint stimulation. If that’s not for you, and it’s not my cup of tea, then this toy isn’t for you.

It does curve to fit in the palm of you hand or against your mons, but the curve doesn’t quite fit with my pubic bone. This might not be your issue, however. Nevertheless, the buttons aren’t positioned so that you can simply hold the Le Reve Rechargeable in your palm. They’re at the rounded end, which means you couldn’t just turn it around if you wanted a broad contact area.

Although the toy is small, the vibrations really are focused at the end, however. It’s weird how quickly they taper out. This may be due to the hard, plastic body of the toy. It’s glossy and slick. You won’t need much, if any, lube with the Le Reve Rechargeable. However, if you like drag ,you might be better off with a silicone clit stim like Siri. There is a ridge that I can feel going around the toy; although, it’s not seriously protruding.

The buttons consist of two, a plus and minus. They’re silicone and easy to find, even in the dark. I appreciate this. A similar soft silicone covers the charging port, which is on the port near the butt of the toy. You can see it just a bit in my photo above. This makes the toy waterproof, but I wouldn’t submerge it. According to the product page, you only need to charge for an hour, which is a plus. I’ve charged it once, but I’ve used it far less than that, so I can’t tell you — yet — how long the charge will last.

Operation is super simple, and while some places this list as “ten function,” I think there’s actually more vibration levels than that. However, they’re all quite buzzy and quite close together. I can find more difference between the sound output than the vibration output. Le Reve Rechargeable isn’t the loudest toy I’ve ever owned, and you should be good if you close a door and turn on a fan, but I find it to be a little loud for its strength.

My advice? Skip this one if you need power.

3 Comments


Get Nervous

May 3rd, 2013

 

I am an anxious person. I am less so than I was during my divorce. In fact, I may be the least anxious I’ve ever been in 2013, save for a period in 2010 when I may have just been in denial. Thus, I tend to overthink things. I analyze them, and I have a hard time putting things on the back burner. I don’t even think that I have a back burner, in fact. I have to deal with everything right now. Of course, things that can’t be dealt with until the future drive me crazy.

I’m going a little bit crazy in this odd sort of purgatory space that I seem to be operating in with the bartender. I know that I like him and he likes me. He’s said that he won’t do anything with anyone else as long as we are having sex, which we are. The same is true for me; although, I haven’t said as much. One could assume that about me pretty easily, however.

But nothing’s official, and I’m not even sure what’s in movement. I’m just not much of a go-with-the-flow sort of person. I like to control things, and I know he wants to move slowly, but the purgatory is weird. This is especially true because we don’t see each other quite as much as I’d like, but I don’t think it’s possible, given out current schedules and transportation issues, for us to see is more. I’d be happier in this position if I saw him two or three times a week or knew exactly when I’d see him next.

So the fact that he’s been a little quiet has me getting a little nervous. He tends to pull away when he’s stressed, and he’s doing this now. I know that giving him space is the best course of action, but it’s difficult for me to do so. In the interim, my mind races circles, wondering if his stress has anything to do with me or if he’s lying because I’ve done something and he’s pulling away.

I don’t necessarily think that any of these things are true but I worry that they could be because I am a nervous Nellie like that. And I’m more than a little cautious after he stopped talking to me for no good reason for several weeks. So I may be a bit worried that he will repeat or that he’s cooled off since then or that the suggestion that eventually I will want to label what we’re doing has scared him off, and maybe none of those thoughts have any merit

But what if they do?

 

**Pat Benatar because she’s awesome. I will punch you in the throat if you disagree.

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Jerk.

May 1st, 2013

May is masturbation month. I’ve normally given it an amused nod in the past, but I think I’m going to try to keep up by masturbating every day until my birthday. Wish me luck!

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