More is.. less?

December 8th, 2008

I was reading Betty’s post about a little alone time and she posted a picture of all the implements she used. There were a handful of items, some different toys. And it got me to thinking. I guess I’ve always been a “less is more” girl when it came to masturbation, and I generally only use one or two toys – lube aside.  I’ll use my hands and a rabbit or another vibe. I’ll stick to one dildo or just my hands. Granted, I’m not one who has marathon masturbation session,s but I couldn’t help butwonderg, are most people like me?

When masturbating, do you typically use a toy or two (including hands) or more? What makes it better?

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I Am a Word Whore

December 7th, 2008

My husband and I met online. We had a lot of very satisfying rounds of cybersex. By that point, I was fairly experienced in talking dirty online and I knew what I want. He definitely did the job – and then some! – and I was happy to finally have a partner who consistently performed well.

Since amrrying and moving in together, we have obviously not had the chance to participate in such arousing activities and I have missed it.Words do so much for me and physical sex does not provide as much opportunity to use words as does cyber or phone sex. I found myself not being worked into the frenzy I had once known and my desire did seem to lessen a little.

Currently, my husband is away for business reasons. Left to my own devices, I feel as though I have rediscovered my sexuality. I’ve been playing with toys a lot, not just because I have many to review but because I find myself more aroused. I am feeling that desire deep within my body that I have no felt for ages. What’s more is I have been able to funnel this desire in my husband’s direction. I’m not simply masturbating and fantasizing. Rather, I am fantasizing about him and being with him.

In an unsually naughty mood last night, we exchanged sultry texts about how much we missed and wanted one another and what we would do when we are together again. I felt my heart beating faster. I grew wetter and more aroused as he described how hard his cock was for me. Though, I was in a better position to relieve my sexual tension and I quickly broke out a new toy and fucked myself with it roughly. Until I came.

I felt so renwed sexually. And almost relieved that my husband could still bring out these feelings in myself. I hadn’t before realized how much my libido might have been suffering from a lack of words. And then is when I realized it: I am a word whore. I would much rather have satisfying cyber sex than mediocre intercourse for the rest of my life. If someone can paint a picture with their words, I am more than willing to suspend disbelief and imagine myself into a place where we are both breathing heavily, sweating and grinding against eachother.

Perhaps using these words is easier when you’re on the other end of a computer but I have been to that place again and I do not want to go back. So I will make it my mission to use more words, during sex and all the time so that I can get into that sexual frenzy and the pounding of his hard cock will be what releases me.

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Rock Chick!

December 5th, 2008

This is an archived review of a discontinued product.

I had long lusted over the Rock Chick which was, surely, the first in a quickly expanding type of dual stimulating vibrators for women that are not rabbit style. Its unusual style caught my eye years ago, but its higher price wasn’t something I was willing to pay, even though it has become more affordable since I first discovered it. When Good Vibes announced their reviewer program, I quickly signed up and it wasn’t long before I held in my very own hands my very own Rock Chick!

Besides lusting over this C-shaped toy, I knew a few things. I knew it was softer than it appeared in images, although I wasn’t sure how soft. I also knew that while some folks loved it, others just couldn’t get it to work for them. I was cautiously hopeful I would be one of the first group.

First examination of the Rock Chick revealed that this is really a no-frills type of toy. A simple, removable bullet is inserted into a supple yet firm silicone body. It came in a plastic box that had no frills – and no instructions. I was a little wary of that. I was also wary that this little bullet – after I struggled to release it from its home – is powered by a strange battery type. While I’m sure I can pick up replacements at some place like Walmart, I would prefer it were a more typical battery like AA.

There was a lot of give in the medical-grade silicone of this vibrator, which I figured would be necessary to maneuver it into place. It also makes it a very hygienic vibrator, which can be completely sterilized by boiling or wiping with a 10% bleach solution – after you take out the bullet, of course! I found this possible but a bit difficult. When inserting the bullet, you may consider using a little lube to make it easier to extract later. It’s also a great material for a waterproof vibrator such as this. Yet, I think it would be much harder to use it in the shower as I only tried it lying. I’ve actually had it slip out while standing.

With a little water-based lube, I slid the Rock Chick inside myself as I stood, and the G-spot stimulator quickly found its place. However, while I definitely felt stimulated, I cannot say whether it was in a pleasurable way. Although the silicone carried the vibrations well, it was definitely muted once the toy was snuggled inside me.

I next tried to work with the clitoral stimulator, where the bullet is situated and lay down to get to work. Although the bullet was smaller to fit the size and shape of the toy, it was fairly powerful. Still, I would have preferred stronger vibrations, which is a complaint I share with many. The bullet is not very loud, however. This might make it a good toy for those who need to be inconspicuous.

Although I had longed for this toy, I soon found myself bewildered at just what I should be doing with it so after a search, I finally found an instructional video on the maker’s site (how I missed it the first time I visited is beyond me). This video was both entertaining and helpful, and soon I was back to trying my Rock Chick. Using their suggestions for movement and positions like on the edge of the bed or chair I tried yet again. However, these suggestions really only left my G-spot sore and me frustrated with a toy for which I had such high hopes. I put the Rock Chick away for the time being but I was not yet ready to give up on it!

And I’m glad I wasn’t. The second time around was much easier. I cannot say what changed, but I felt immediately more satisfaction after inserting the toy at a later time. It seemed to reach a much better spot internally. I spent a little intimate time with the Rock Chick, just letting it vibrate between my legs and clenching my thighs around it, something I’ve done when aroused for years. As I lay on my side, I came to realize how much this was like how I had masturbated manually and how the Rock Chick seemed to better compliment this style as opposed to other toys.

After getting to know my new toy a little more slowly, I was ready to try that rockin’ thing once more. Instead of using my hips, I rocked the the toy with my hand. I soon found my fleshy girl parts to be a bit of a hindrance in this practice. I think someone who is less full bodied might have better time rocking this toy against their vulva. I found that the vibrations and pressure did not work well outside of my labia but it was a tight fit if I tried to use the toy snugged inside of my labia. Still, I tried moving the external end of the toy to different positions of my vulva and, as I rocked, I found the ridges to be a generally pleasurable sensation, although I wouldn’t think them necessary for enjoyment.

One other side to my fleshyness is that when the Rock Chick is nestled inside my labia and I was rocking it, it turned off when the button on the bullet pressed against my labia. I would consider moving the position of the bullet so this does not occur. However, due to the rocking nature, the next movement caused the button to push back against my body and the rock chick was on again.

Eventually, I was able to cum this way. I was able to use my hands to apply pressure to the toy rather than using my fingers directly, which relieved a lot of the strain of manual masturbation. Once I got the hang of it, using the Rock Chick really mimicked the way I masturbate and allowed me to receive the pleasure I required to orgasm.

Still, I wanted to see if this was a fluke and took yet another test drive with the Rock Chick. This time, the G-spot stimulation was almost null, and I could definitely tell I wasn’t finding the sweet spot I had found the second time I used it. I do not think this toy is going to be one that offers me a lot of internal sensation. However, I do like the feeling of being able to clench down on something when orgasming clitorally, so I do like the internal aspect.

I was able to orgasm yet again and I noticed that the Rock Chick seemed to become a bit more supple each time I used it. I was able to pressure it closed against my pubic bone as I rocked with this toy, providing even more pressure.

If not for the suppleness of this toy, I would likely be disappointed. I think this toy is more angular than it is curvy and it just seemed like there was too much material at an awkward angle where it bends. This was especially noticeable when I had the Rock Chick inside of me. Right outside the entrance to my pussy was a strange angle that didn’t work well to grasp but became less of an issue when I was pushing the silicone down.

I have enjoyed getting to know my Rock Chick and while I cannot say it is the best toy in my collection, I look forward to learning how to use it to better please myself. As a clitoral toy, it really eases the strain on my hands and mimics the way I have been masturbating for years so I do enjoy it. I didn’t receive as much stimulation from this toy as a G-spot toy; however, I was focusing on the clitoral aspect and am happy with that.

I definitely think the style of masturbation this toy brings is not for everyone. I also think the size and shape will be very hit-and-miss for women, and even the same woman may have trouble getting it to work right every time. Nevertheless, I would advise giving this toy a ride a few times before calling it quits and being open-minded to masturbation in a completely different way. You might just be surprised at how much the Rock Chick, well, rocks!

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Whatever happened to relaxing vacations?

December 3rd, 2008

My time back “home” went fast and was packed with excitement. Stepping on the plane this morning, I was exhausted both emotionally and physixcally and ready to come back to my cat. I arrived home to a package I knew had arrived and another which was something of a surprise. I had alreayd left without finishing my review for the Rock Chick and now I have a handful other items including the Passion Wave Vibrator and my first glass dildo (actually, it’s my first dildo ever)! Wow!

I am super excited to try it but definitely am too tired today. Why am I not sleeping yet?!

Anyway, as I struggled opening my boxes and waded through pounds of packing material – styrofoam and bubble wrap – it got me thinking. Styrofoam as a packing material really bugs me. Bubble wrap is better but a lot of things come in boxes which are just so large. I think bag type shipping containers save a lot of waste but they don’t work well for everything.

Am I the only one who is bothered by oversized boxes and tons of foam? Do your care about your packing materials and containers? Does it affect your shopping habits at all? What would you prefer?

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Sex Toy Materials at a Glance

November 24th, 2008

I am a little concerned about sex toy materials. Being, that I would prefer to use safer and higher quality toys but I would likely not completely rule out certain materials because they are not as quality. It really depends on the toy in question.

However, keeping track of sex toy materials – of which there are many – can be difficult even if you make an effort to be aware. So, I thought I’d provide a fact sheet detailing some of the common materials used for sex toys in descending order of quality. (I’m excluding things like wood, glass and metal which are much less confusing.)

Elastomed
Elastomed is a medical grade elastomer derivative which is nonporous, phthlalate free, hypoallergenic, odorless and completely safe. These toys are safe to use with either silicone or water based lubricants. Sex toys made of Elastomed tend to be less pliable. Although Elastomed shares many of the same great characteristics as silicone, it should not be boiled or wiped with an alcohol or bleach solution.
Silicone
100% silicone is nonporous, therefore it can be sterilized by boiling for 3 minutes or washing them in your dishwasher (top shelf, no mechanical toys, remove bullets) which makes them safe for sharing. It also does not contain potentially harmful chemical softeners known as phthalates. Silicone is rather pliable, comes in many colours and densities and also retains heat (try warming before use) which makes it very popular.

There is some debate about whether silicone toys can be used with silicone lubricants. Pure silicone toys can be used with silicone toys. However, toys need only contain 10% silicone to be labeled as such so your toy and lube (or if you store several silicone toys touching) may appear to “react” with eachother. This is actually the melting of chemical softeners in your toy which indicates that it is not pure silicone. However, you should spot test your toys to check. It is always safe to use a water based lube with silicone toys.
VixSkin Silicone
VixSkin Silicone is a 100% premium silicone product from Vixen Creations and is safer than other skinlike materials without losing its realistic feel. The material in VixSkin Silicone is nonporous and can be sterilized by boiling for 3 minutes, wiping down with a 10% bleach solution or washing in the dishwasher. Like silicone toys, it is best not to use silicone based lubricants with VixSkin Silicone because it may cause a reaction. Spot test your toy in an inconspicuous place if you would like to use silicone based lube.
TPR Silicone
TPR Silicone is a mix of Silicone and ThermoPlastic Rubber (see below). This phthalate free composite is 10% silicone or more and generally has no taste or smell. Hardness varies in TPR silicone which can be very pliable. It is less porous than jelly but cannot be sterilized so sharing should only be done with condoms. TPR Silicone can be cleaned with a toy cleaner of soap and water and, to ensure a long life of your TPR silicone toy, it should only be used with water based lubricants.
TPR
TPR, or Thermo Plastic Rubber, Silicone is a blend of silicone and rubber. Although it is less porous than rubber it is still slightly porous, thus it cannot be sterilized like pure silicone but can easily be cleaned with warm water and soap or a toy cleaner. TPR toys should not be boiled. If you plan to share TPR toys, use them with a condom. TPR Silicone is pliable, easy to wash and phthalate-free. TPR toys can be used with water or silicone based lubricants.
TPE
Thermoplastic Elastomers (Elastormer, TPE Plastic) are not nonporous and is essentially the same as TPR. However, they are less porous than materials such as Cyberskin. Like TPR toys, TPE sex toys should not be boiled and cannot be disinfected. These toys can be cleaned with warm water and soap or an antibacterial toy cleaner. If shared, use condoms with Elastomer sex toys. TPE is often used in toys which have several textures. Like TPR, TPE can be used with water or silicone based lubricants.
Jelly
Jelly is a common sex toy material and may be cheaper than silicone alternatives. However, it is also more inferior in quality. Jelly toys are made of PVC which is chemically softened with phthalates, a potentially harmful ingredient which causes jelly toys to have an unpleasant and sometimes stubborn “rubber” smell. Jelly toys are soft and pliable and come in many colours. Jelly toys are porous and cannot be sterilized so they should only be shared if condoms are used. Condoms may also prolong the life of jelly sex toys. Jelly toys can be used with both water and silicone based lubes, should be cleaned with warm water and mild soap and store in a cool environment.

Jelly may be a term given to any soft sex toy when the material is actually higher quality of traditional PVC jelly.
Rubber
Rubber sex toys generally contain latex, an ingredient to which many people are allergy. Latex toys are also lower quality than other sex toy materials and have a shorter life, even when looked after carefully. Rubber toys usually have a strong smell that may never be completely eliminated. Rubber toys are nonporous, thus they cannot be sterilized and you should use condoms with rubber toys you plan to share. Rubber toys can be cleaned with warm water and soap but should never be boiled. Rubber toys come in over 260 different colours, are cheap to make (and buy) and are soft which make rubber one of the most popular sex toy materials. Rubber toys can be used with silicone or water based lubricants.
Cyberskin
Cyberskin and other skin-like materials (Pure skin, SoftTouch, SoftSkins, PassionSkin, Futurotic) tend to be the least safe materials in the sex toy market because they are so porous. However, what they lack in safety may be counteracted by their flesh-like appeal to some folks. Cyberskin and similar toys can be cleaned with soap and water but never can be disinfected so use with a condom is a must if sharing toys. Using a condom may also be beneficial even if you do not share Cyberskin toys because these materials may contain potentially harmful chemical softeners known as phthalates which can also cause reactions between toys so store your Cyberskin toys away from eachother and silicone toys as well. Use only water based lubes with these toys and store them in a cool, dark place. Many of these toys arrived dusted in cornstarch and should be stored as such when you are finished with them (but not talc!) Condoms may prolong the life of these toys but do not expect Cyberskin and similar toys to last a lifetime.

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Read This!

November 21st, 2008

I wrote 2 reviews today: 1 for Wet Light and 1 for Silicone Cock Rings so check them out.

Also, I’ve been diligently “working” with Rock Chick for review purposes only. 😉

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lingerie

Under the Bed Restraints

November 20th, 2008

I was excited that Babeland would be kind enough to supply me with some Under the Bed Restraints. It seemed like the perfect way to finally bring my interest in BDSM from the internet to the bedroom (and real life). I knew the restraints had been rated highly by many folks before, so I expected a quality product that would allow me to truss up my husband easily.

After the restraints arrived, I spent nearly 2 weeks being unable to use them because of lack of time and other intrusions. We had jested back and forth about using them and finally decided to have them set up for his next “weekend” off. I finally got the chance.

Under the Bed Restraints by Sportsheets were in a smaller package than I expected, but this didn’t mean they would be less impressive. The plastic clamshell box was disappointing with its display of a naked woman that leaves little to the imagination. Sportsheets has since upgraded this to a cardboard box featuring a different woman, so I guess that’s an upgrade.

I was surprised to open the package and see such a small pile of straps, clips, rings and cuffs. I was also worried about how much work it would be to get under the bed as I would be the eonly person installing them, and our mattress is quite large at 17″ high. Despite all my reservations, Under the Bed Restraints came through.

The restraints come with the cuffs unattached, which is how I left them when installing them. There are a total of five straps: one connector strap that goes beneath the mattress and four that connect to either side of that center strap to make the four wrist and ankle straps. Each strap in the set is 60″ long.

To install the under-the-bed restraints, I slid one end of the connector strap and one restraint strap under the head of my mattress, beneath the bed skirt. I pulled the restraint strap until it was roughly even with the other restraint strap, and that side of the connector strap was centered beneath the mattress. I mirrored the process for the foot of the bed, which was more difficult because the left restraint was trying to go over the bed skirt rather than under.

After I straightened it out, I attached the cuffs to each restraint. Each cuff is outfitted with a metal clip (like on the end of a dog leash), and each strap is fitted with a ring where the clip is attached. I pulled on the cuffs for good measure to make sure there was no give in the connecting strap beneath the bed. I adjusted the straps so they had as much room as possible because of our large mattress. We have a queen-sized bed, and I can see this being too small for those with larger beds unless the mattresses are very thin.

After installing the restraint system, I adjusted the straps so there was no slack and tucked them, along with the cuffs, into the bed rails beneath the skirt. They became virtually invisible after I smoothed the bed skirt back down over them. I was excited at the thought of reaching down and cuffing my partner with the seemingly “invisible” restraints. You could also tuck the cuffs beneath the edge of the mattress. This also makes storage extremely easy, and unless I move the bed, I don’t have to do anything but reach for the cuffs when I want to play.

All in all, installation took about 10 minutes by myself and was not extremely difficult despite a cat who kept chasing the straps and working beneath my bed skirt. I only had to lift the edge of the mattress, and then I slid the restraints beneath it, so it was not as much effort as I would have thought. I have also repeated the process twice more since I first got these with no more difficulty.

During this process, I took some time to get to know the restraint system. The straps are woven nylon, similar to some belts, attached to keychain-like rings, and the metal clips seemed to be pretty standard. For someone creative, imitating this setup would not be very difficult. Furthermore, if something breaks on my restraint system, I can replace it without trashing the whole set.

I was impressed with the cuffs, which are lined with super soft felt and measure in at 9.5″, which makes them long enough for even fairly wide wrists. They are fastened with velcro, which makes them easy to use and easy to take off in a hurry, such as if the kids come home early. 😉 The velcro straps are quite long and allow the straps to be adjusted from 5″ to 13.5″ inches (if you don’t mind feeling the velcro on your wrists). Although velcro can be easily pulled apart, these cuffs felt very secure for the type of pulling they would experience.

Putting them on my partner was just as easy, although he wasn’t resisting much. I did use my body weight in my aid when he resisted at first, something that should work for many. The cuffs wrapped comfortably around his wrists and ankles as he lay face up. As I started to tease him with a bullet, I found the straps for his legs had too much give and easily adjusted them by pulling on the straps with one tug. I felt assured that should I need to do the opposite (give slack), that I would be able to do so with one move as well.

I felt that the straps were very secure around his ankles, but no more than a minute after I’d cuffed one wrist, he had gotten out. He has extremely long fingers and was easily able to undo the straps. I would find this much more difficult or even impossible because of my short fingers, but so you might want to consider who will be trussed up. I have continued to use the restraints with other cuffs to eliminate that issue.

Depending on the way someone struggles, they could pull the straps far to one side. The straps also like to slip when not in use because of my bed skirt, and the same would happen on an adjustable base. However, moving them back into place is easy enough by tugging near the cuffs.

Speaking of maintenance, I have yet to wash these as they haven’t gotten any lube or fluids on them. Technically, you could put them into the machine, especially if you put them in some sort of bag. You can also hand wash them without too much hassle. I would let them hang dry, of course.

I thought the restraints added a nice aspect to our play. I was able to tease and tickle him, and, after I tightened the straps, he was helpless. I know he also enjoyed the sensation and felt no discomfort from the cuffs. Under the bed, restraints would also work well for someone who is on their stomach for impact play, such as spanking or flogging. You could also stimulate someone’s chest/breasts or genitals while they’re on their back.

However, your positions are somewhat limited. A person could be spread eagle or stretched with arms above their head and legs closer together or a combination of spread and close limbs. It would be harder to pull the arms and legs together on each side, but you could figure it out. While you could do doggy style, it wouldn’t make as much sense with the restraints. The restraints could be used to bind someone of the right height who is leaning over the bed for better access to genitals and to make a better target of the ass. But you can’t do everything with Under the Bed Restraints.

And that’s okay. They’re practical and easy to use and store bondage solution, and I heartily recommend Under the Bed Restraints to anyone interested in bondage, amateur or pro!

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