

Of Sex and Love is now on Facebook. Really, this is all the Facebook presence I wanted for this identity/website in the first place. Please like me and if I sent you a confirmation request, be so kind as to follow through! I will slowly be phasing out my account as much as Facebook lets me. Unfortunately, I cannot deactivate the personal profile and keep the page. However, I will no longer be directing tweets and website updates to the space.
Without further ado, I leave you with my new Facebook page. Please become my fan!

Berman Weighted Pelvic Exerciser Marilyn
This is a discontinued product, but you can try a smart Kegel trainer or Kegel balls to improve muscle function.
I haven’t had a lot of luck with the other Dr Berman toys I’ve tried. They’re frequently poor quality and inferior materials. Many of them items seem like there were design by someone who has no idea what a man or woman truly wants from a sex toy, let alone a so-called expert. In fact, I have thrown out every single Dr. Berman toy I’ve had a chance to try, so I don’t have high hopes for them. If you’re getting the picture that I wouldn’t have personally chosen to buy this dildo/PC exerciser, then you’re right.
But, I think this toy is probably less of an abomination than every other toy in the line. However, it could definitely use some improvements. Let’s start with the obvious. This is made of resin. I assume it’s something like acrylic. Every once in a while, you see a toy made of this hard material. On EF’s scales, it’s rated a 9, so it’s not horrible, but I think it is confusing. So the toy seems similar to but not quite like glass. That is, it’s clear, smooth and rigid. It sounds like plastic if you hit it with a nail, though. The density isn’t quite the same.
I think it’s also a little lighter than glass, but I’m not positive. I don’t know if this is actually working against the design. You see, California Exotics has included two weighted stainless steel balls in either end of the toy. One of obviously larger and heavier than the other. The intent is to use this is a pelvic muscle exerciser, but I think perhaps the weight of glass could have helped this, reducing or even eliminating the need for the balls themselves. Maybe I’m wrong, but I find the material choice curious.
I’m also not sold on the design. I recognize that this isn’t supposed to be a dildo per se, but I’m betting that most people will want it to be versatile. The end with the larger internal ball has a single row of nubs that run around the circumference. It’s got no texture at all. I like rows of nubs or, preferably, ridges that wrap around the entire shaft. I’m not much of a fan of such a difference between texture and lack thereof, so this isn’t my thing.
The other side of the shaft also has some interesting texture, but I’m having a hard time describing it. If you look at it head on from the end, it looks a bit like a star. There are elongated dimples that are about an inch or so long running down the length of the shaft. This results in angled ridges. Most ridges tend to be more square or round, at least in my experience. This is unique, but I think it looks cooler than it is.
The rest of the shaft is completely smooth. It tapers toward the center, so either end is wider. Both ends come to a rounded point, and it seems like the one on the nubby end is a little more rounded, but it could just be shorter. That end seems significantly smaller, even though it holds the larger internal ball. I think it’s just my eyes playing tricks on me though. It is smaller, but not by much. The smaller end measures about 1.4″ in diameter, while the larger end measures a little over 1.5″ in diameter. The product description says 1.25″, but that doesn’t match any measurement I took. The thinnest part is less than an inch wide, so I’ve no idea.
Sizewise, this could work for people who like smaller toys, but because the ends are larger, there’s no tapering to help you out. This isn’t really for pleasure in that way. Ideally, you’d start with the larger end with the smaller ball for PC exercises. You could pull with your fingers while using your muscles to play tug of war or simply insert and squeeze. I suppose if you were so inclined, you could walk around with it inserted, but I’m not. Then, you’d move to the smaller end, which would require better trained muscles and which, in theory, result in more of a workout because of the weightier ball.
But therein lies the keyword: workout. I don’t have the time or effort to be so conscientious about my PC muscles, and I don’t think it’s necessary for me. If you experience more difficulties with bladder control or have just given birth, you might be more concerned than I am. Perhaps this “Weighted Pelvic Exerciser” might be more up your alley or your doctor would recommend something similar. Then again, I’m not sure why you couldn’t just use a regular dildo or, if you’re lazy like me, some kegel balls might be better for passive exercise. I’m just saying.
In terms of quality, there’s no seams. Ease of use? Yep. Versatility? Eh, not so much. Cleaning and care? As easy as glass or hard plastic. I’d you could use any lube with this, but I’m not really sure. So information? Cal Exotics is pretty lacking there. Still, this toy doesn’t seem to do much that one of my glass dildos does, and I can use them to get off or squirt, too. However, it’s definitely the least offensive in the Berman line, so there’s that.

Writer Rose Crompton explores how sex shops are no longer a male only domain.
There was a time when you said the phrase “sex shop” and floods of negative connotations would come to mind: tucked away down a dark alley, illuminated by a flickering red light or garish XXX neon sign. Once entering the shop you’d be accosted by shelves upon shelves of hardcore porn DVD’s – many with cover images that could lead to the question of the legality of it – each row filled with seedy looking gents in long coats, fingering the cases carefully as he decides which bit of grot to take home tonight.
This is, of course, total stereotyping and although there are still many scenes like this that ring true in red light districts around the world, it’s also hard not to notice that there is a big shift happening and the face of sex shopping, how we do it and the characters we come across, are radically changing.
Dare we say it, but it appears that sex shops are becoming more female friendly, even specifically targeting women. With the opening of sex stores or raunchy lingerie shops on the high-street, it means that adult stores are being taken out of the dingy back streets and thrust into the bright lights of acceptable consumerism and us women are definitely not turning a blind eye to it. In fact, we relish it, especially with the online explosion where sites like Vibrations Direct, which are tailored to appeal to women and couples specifically, it appears that sex shopping is no longer a male domain.
Men may still have porn, only just thanks to a number of female directors and production companies breaking through, but women definitely have the real pleasure chest at their fingertips. The number of vibrators, dildos, bondage gear and sex clothing that is targeted at women far outweighs what men have at their sexual disposal, if they choose. As the shops move into the light, so do the Sex toys companies as they create ever more desirable and lust-worthy toys. Some of these are even elevated to the status of designer brands and are distinctly aimed at women.
For savvy, sex positive ladies (or those of use that have watched countless episodes of Sex And The City), most of us know the difference between our bullet vibes and rampant rabbits. Where once men used to find shopping for the right lingerie for their partner intimidating a recent survey revealed that 90 percent of British blokes now have that down. The new frontier is now sex shops and knowing how to buy the right vibrator when she asks him to “surprise her” that is presenting a real challenge.
There have been too many times men have contacted Vibrations Direct to ask, “Where do I start? I don’t have a clue what half this stuff does!” and it’s clear that a domain in which men used to feel so comfortable is fast become deep, uncharted waters for them.
So, the tables have clearly turned: once it was that women would find it intimidating to enter a sex shop, let alone buy a vibrator, even with their partner and despite the fact they were otherwise a sexually confident lady. “I was dating a fetish model and even she found it unnerving to go in,” explains frequent sex shopper, Whiskey.
It’s now men that come in holding their girlfriend or wife’s hand and allowing her to take the lead when it comes to provocatively fingering the toy boxes and making the decision on which sex aide to take home that night.
Welcome to Edition 21 of the Sex Toy Society round-up of all the sex toy reviews written by Society authors over the past week.
Want to be included in next weeks edition? All you need to do is visit this page and submit your latest reviews and photographs before 11:59pm BST on Thursday 25th October 2012. Our authors of the week are selected by the number of reviews published, comments posted, ratings submitted and photographs added to the Society so get adding!
You can also find us on Twitter for all the latest news on the Society.
Author Of The Week
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Hi,
Remember me? Adriana’s the pseudonym. I’ve been reviewing your dildos, vibrators, bondage gear and lubes for years. Years. I’ve tried G-spot and rabbit vibrators. Silicone dildos and those made of God-knows-what. I’ve got whips and paddles and handcuffs–no chains yet, though. I’ve tried lubes that stuck and some that stung and some that worked wonderfully. Even green ones. I could probably write a poem about it.
Let’s see:
This lube has a water base
this one’s made from silicone
this one smells, so keep it far from your face
this one helps you ride his cock all the way home
I don’t know. It’s a work in progress. I wrote it in, like, ten seconds, okay? My point is, you know me, and I know all about your products. And I think you’re slacking. It’s not just that I’ve tried everything; it’s that you’re not coming out with new things that are innovative or different in a way that actually works.
The last truly innovative product I recall seeing was the Minna Ola–and that was 2010. Now, I’m just seeing products that are re-released versions of previous toys, and many of these upgrades are pretty lackluster. Maybe I’m in the minority, but I’d like to see something new that gets me excited.
It feels like these past two years have include a lot of copycat designs, silicone molds and fancy terminology that tries to convince me this toy is something better than last year’s model when it isn’t. As someone who also doesn’t like buzzy vibrations, I’m continuously shocked when manufacturers rely on AAAs as a power source. What’s up with that?
So, dear manufacturers, let me sum it up for you. You’re lagging, you’re boring, you’re failing, and I’m onto you. I want you to create toys that look pretty, provide unforgettable sensations and last a little more than six months if that isn’t too much to ask. I’m willing to pay more for a better toy. Hell, plenty of us are. But I’m not so willing to pay a lot for a mediocre toy that’s a rehash of the same old thing.
The only way you’re going to be able to do something new is if you’re not afraid to experiment and make mistakes. Sure, it might be expensive and, yes, not every toy will succeed, but where do you think all these innovative sex toys came from anyway?