Spring and Summer 2022 Media Recommendations

July 31st, 2022

You know how I started doing monthly media recommendations and when it became quarterly, and now it’s been more than six damn months since I posted any recs? Well, now you do! Anyway, here’s a post chock-full of links to awesome videos, podcasts, and books about sex!

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I’ve already sung praises for Netflix’s How to Build a Sex Room on Twitter. And I’m not the only one. It’s the sex-positive home renovation show I didn’t know I needed (and I’ll soon be posting a lengthy post inspired by it)!

Another great watch is Episode 1 of the series The Mysteries of X and Y by Scientific American: A Question of Sex. I’m not sure if there will actually be a second episode, but this is a good look at the biological complexities of sex.

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I not only  komcaught up with some of the podcasts I know about but decided to look for some fresh meat. One of those shows is Practice Outside the Line, a podcast where Heather, founder of the Sexual Health Alliance, talks to people who are in the business-educators, researchers, therapists and more. I especially loved this episode featuring Nicoletta Heidegger, who we know and love from Sluts & Scholars!

99PI played clips from Remembering Stonewall in an episode last month that you can check out if you’re interested in LGBTQ+ rights and history. You might consider pairing it with this episode of Outward, featuring Hugh Ryan who discusses his book and the connections between prison and queer culture, including Stonewall.

I started watching Will & Grace for the very first time after hearing Malcolm Gladwell discuss how groundbreaking and carefully crafted it was, which contributed to its popularity. The show itself is dated, of course, but it’s a part of history and seeing how much society has changed since 1998 shows how much progress we’ve made.

I’m going to be honest when I say that I have zero idea how I came across the Sexology by Dr. Moali podcast. But I’m glad because the episode featuring Dr. Peggy Kleinplatz is such a practical, helpful, and even hopeful podcast about having better sex,

I’ve been waiting anxiously for Beyond Fear: The Sex Crimes Podcast to return. It’s heavy but important work, and I am so grateful to Alissa and Alexa for creating this podcast. The episodes about invisible survivors of sex crimes and the ideal victim are so very important. I suspect that the themes of racism and poor treatment of survivors will continue this season.

Much earlier this year, Unladylike tackled intimacy coordinators and Hollywood’s resistance to employing them. More recently, Cristen made an episode about the overturning of Roe versus Wade, in which she delves into who the infamous Dobbs in “Dobbs v Jackson” is.

For something completely different, you might want to tune into the episode of Behind the Bastards about the father of gynecology and his unconscionable medical experimentation on Black women.

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I’ve been utilizing the university library to my advantage, and that includes several books about sex, even though I haven’t read all of them. I am fairly positive that I picked up Magnificent Sex after listening to the Dr. Kleinpatz podcast above. Peggy and her team surveyed people about what makes sex good and used it to provide some helpful information.

I finally got around to reading Lux Alptraum’s Faking It: The Lies Women Tell about Sex–And the Truths They Reveal. It was such a deeper dive into whether and when women are believed and its impact on when and how they lie. I wasn’t expecting that, but it definitely gave me food for thought.

Finally, I recently finished Polysecure by Jessica Fern and recommended it to my therapist. Now, I’m recommending it to my readers! The book is all about attachment and trauma as it applies to poly relationships, but I found it infinitely useful as someone who is single and hasn’t been in a poly situation. For whatever reason, I struggled to apply attachment theory to myself before reading this book. Sometimes things just click, I guess! Anyway, the book is a good intro to attachment theory even if you’re not familiar, and then Jessica launches into some practical advice. She also wrote a workbook you can pair with it. 

Those are my media recommendations for the first half (and some change) for 2022. There’s a lot of good stuff in here, whether you simply want to learn more, improve your relationship, or become a better practitioner!

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Autumn 2021 Media Recommendations

December 26th, 2021

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I experience an odd disconnect with the usual podcasts that I enjoy these last few months, perhaps due to the media I had to consume for classes and maybe a bit due to depressive feelings, which I’m not entirely beyond. Something switched over the last month or so, however, and I found that the first few episodes I’d been skipping over in my queue were pretty awesome.

First up, Unladylike did a whole series on sexual topics, I think because Planned Parenthood sponsored them. They dove into how female pleasure has been monetized and the (lack of) science behind squirting, among other topics. I also really appreciated a more recent episode, Childfree After Infertility.

Speaking of science, you know I had to listen to The Science of Orgasms on the Sex and Psychology podcast. Dr. Lehmiller interviewed researcher Dr. Nicole Prause to discuss the psychology and biology of orgasms.

Sunny Megatron so often delivers with her American Sex podcast. Andrew Gurza of Disability After Dark and his sister Heather Morrison discussed disability and their new sex toy for disabled folks in an episode earlier this month. Sunny also invited Kitty Stryker onto the show to talk about the “morality war” against OnlyFans.

I think we all know that blue balls are bullshit, but it’s still worth listening to the Science Vs episode about them. Not only is it humorous as always, but Wendy and her guests ponder whether and how people with vaginas have similar experiences.

Finally, I randomly came across How Gender Equality Can Save the Planet from A Matter of Degrees. It’s definitely worth a listen.

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If you’ve got a few minutes, check out Dr. Liz Powell’s take on erotic humiliation in her appearance on Watts the Safeword.

Abortion was definitely a hot topic in my classes this semester, and What It’s Like to Have A Second-Trimester Abortion was actually part of one of my lectures. It’s important to remember that some people have no choice but to abort wanted pregnancies, and seeing and hearing people discuss those difficult decisions is powerful.

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I was interested in reading Strange Bedfellows since the first I’d heard of it. I enjoyed a few podcasts where Dr. Ina Park promoted her book, so I was super enthused to learn she also narrated the audiobook. It was excellent; although, I wish I had the ebook to go along with it because I definitely wanted to make a few notations. Dr. Park has a voice that’s really easy on the ears, and her writing is approachable, too. In her book, she puts to bed (sorry not sorry) some myths about various STIs. However, she also provides warnings about the future of STIs, especially those that resist medication. It’s a cautionary tale that so few tell, but Dr. Park does it so well.

I’m going to depart from the topic of my blog for my second book recommendation. I haven’t been in the loop, so I didn’t notice that Mary Roach had a new book until I saw a physical copy in stores. Fuzz: When Nature Breaks the Law takes on animals and a few plants in Mary’s iconic humorous style. As always, I learned so much. But this time around, I also found myself appreciating the way she notices and describes the people whom she interviews.

I expect I’ll have a few more book recommendations in my next installation for two reasons. I’m on break for nearly a month and my holiday gifts included some bawdy books. You bet Kate Lister’s newest, Harlots, Whores & Hackabouts: A History of Sex for Sale, was one of them!

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lingerie

Spring 2021 Sexuality Media Recommendations

June 17th, 2021

It’s almost summer, which means I better get a move on if I want to post a list of recommendations for podcasts, books, and videos about sex if I want to do it while it’s still spring. Because I’ve moved to a seasonal-ish schedule, this list is long. But that means there’s plenty to listen to during your commutes, doctor-office-waits, and long walks through the cemetery!

I didn’t read many books about sex, so my recommendations are more general. Similarly, I didn’t watch any standout video content about sex, so I’ve focused on podcasts, instead. However, you’ll definitely find plenty of them listed below!

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I’m going to post my review of Erato: Flash Fiction shortly. In the meantime, you don’t want to miss this collection of skillfully written and inclusive erotic shorts.

It’s not about sex but I really loved reading My Favorite Thing Is Monsters for class and can’t wait for the second. Part of the reason the book speaks to me is the way it addresses sexism and sex work. If you like graphic novels that are literature, horror, and unique art, this is a must-read.

Another non-sex recommendation is Susan Cain’s Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking. This book really got me thinking about how my brain works and how I can help–or hinder–it in the process.

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I’ve been wanting to read Ace: What Asexuality Reveals About Desire, Society, and the Meaning of Sex by Angela Chen for a while. In this interview on Out in the Bay, she reads excerpts from her book, offers new ways to understand sexuality, and discusses moving from science journalism to a book inspire by her own sexuality.

I’d never heard of Man Up before I came across this episode about healthy porn habits. The hosts, who are average guys and not necessarily sexperts, feminists, or super “woke,” discuss healthy ways to use porn in such an honest way.

Researcher Justin Lehmiller invited Dr. Michael Moreno on his podcast in an episode about talking to your doctor about sex. It’s such an important issue because sex impacts our physical and mental health. Yet, doctors don’t always receive a lot of sex education or may avoid these subjects. Advice like that in this podcast is important for patients to advocate for themselves.

Although it’s an older episode, Unladylike re-aired How to Free the Vibrator, a discussion with Polly from Unbound Babes. It dives into creating a feminist, friendly sex store that people aren’t ashamed to shop at or talk about. It’s something that I can sometimes–but shouldn’t–take for granted.

If you’re into learning, then you might like This Podcast Will Kill You. The topics span a broad range, so I only tune in now and then. Of course, I couldn’t resist an episode about HPV. In fact, this episode is one of the most educational and straightforward information sources I’ve ever encountered when it comes to HPV. And I’ve been diagnosed with it. Twice.

While I’m not normally into astrology, this discussion between Nicole and Danny Santos on Sluts and Scholars was an interesting listen that made me appreciate its meaning to people a bit more.

Sex educator Jennifer Litner joins Nicole on Sluts and Scholars to discuss how parents can give proper sex education, pleasure’s role in our lives, and desire discrepancies in long-term relationships.

In an honest and casual discussion, Kitty Stryker and Sunny Megatron discuss the definition of manipulation and the various forms it takes, including those that aren’t inherently negative.

If you haven’t heard about all the censorship of sex happening on social media, this American Sex episode will blow your mind.

Anyone who has wanted to try rope bondage but finds it intimidating will love this interview with Midori American Sex. She tackles the issue in such a no-nonsense way that makes it super accessible while showinga how simplicity can still be powerful and creative.

Sunny absolutely smashed it in her breakdown of the history of sex and porn censorship on the Internet. She discusses how it has been an issue for literal decades, long before SESTA/FOSTA, and how stars, creators, and websites have dealt with increasing restrictions. This episode is so ridiculously eye-opening!

Catie Osborn relates how having ADHD impacts her sex life in an episode of American sex that’s just as helpful for those with ADHD as it is their partners.. and potentially everyone else!

I’ve been looking forward to reading Dr. Ina Park’s book about the science and history of STIs since I first heard of it. Her interview with Tristan Taormino only made me want to read it more (I’m sure I’ll eventually write a review about it)!

Academic and feminist Dr. Heather Berg literally wrote the book about porn as work, and she talks all about it with Tristan Taormino.

I love when someone just pulls back the curtain to reveal fuckery that’s been going on under our noses, and that’s precisely what Kaytlin Bailey when she appeared on Sex Out Loud Radio to discuss the history of sex work. I’m looking forward to checking out more of her work!

I hadn’t heard of Richelle Frabotta before stumbling on this podcast from Miami University, but I love her take on sex education so much that I followed her on Twitter, listened to other podcasts, and am seriously considering receiving training through the Sexual Training Institute, at which she is an instructor.

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Fall 2020 Media Recommendations

October 30th, 2020

I’ve skipped right from spring to autumn, and I hope you all won’t mind! It’s been busy for reasons that I really should blog about! With that, I’ll leave you with some media recommendations that will keep you busy!

A content warning: the last several podcast recommendations mention sexual assault and abortion. I’ll mention the content warning again so you can skip to the next section!

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I found the episode of American Sex with Catie Osborn about ADHD and sex to be interesting. It touched on some science and revealed how much more we have to discover. I only wish she had backed up some of her statements with sources.

Sunny and Ken also interviewed Ana Algos about being a BDSM switch,  teaching kink online, safety, and how COVID has made education more accessible to those people who weren’t privileged enough to participate in such things before.

There are several of Sluts, and Scholars episodes that were great listens for me! First up, Andre Shakti discusses wrestling fetishes, learning shame about sexual interests, and non-intimidating ways you can open up to a partner about sex. I also recommend you tune into the episode with Zoe Ligon, owner of Spectrum Boutique, who discusses her book about sex toys, sex education, and providing toys to shoppers during the pandemic.

I couldn’t write a post without mention Tristan Taormino’s podcast Sex Out Loud Radio, either. Tristan invited Dr. Nan Wise on her show to discuss her interest in neuroscience and sex, which is right up my alley and should be up yours, too!

Content warning: sexual assault and abortion mentioned below

I also LOVED Tristan’s talk with Jennifer S. Hirsch and Shamus Khan about their work on campus sexual assault. It’s the sort of research that I find fascinating, and they ask some tough but necessary questions.

I couldn’t believe how unethical and common pregnancy crisis centers are when I listened to Unladylike’s episode on the topic. The facts and firsthand knowledge shared will blow your mind in the worst possible way, but it’s absolutely worth a listen.

Finally, I want to recommend an entire podcast. Beyond Fear: The Sex Crimes Podcast by Alexa Sardina and Alissa Ackerman is full of the science I love and the compassion we need around the topic of sexual assault. I first heard Alissa on Unladylike in an episode about the American prison system but knew I needed to listen to her podcast with Alexa to understand more about sexual assault. Both women are researchers who have worked with perpetrators and survivors of sexual assault and are survivors themselves, and the knowledge they provide in this podcast is astounding. Every episode has been eye-opening; most have been difficult. I also appreciate what a good job they do with content warnings at the top of each episode. If you can handle it, it’s one of the most important podcasts I’ve ever listened to.

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I came upon these two talks separately, so while they both deal with gender, it’s a coincidence.

In her Ted Talk, Karissa Sanbonmatsu discusses the search for a biological basis for gender and, more specifically, how epigenetics impacts gender. as she attempts to answer the question, “What does it mean to be a woman?” Epigenetics and the basis of gender are both fascinating on their own, but it’s genius to consider them together. Science can only take us so far, however, and the compassionate undertones in Karissa’s speech remind the listener that women don’t exist in vacuums. We’re part of society, which also gives meaning to being a woman.

To continue the theme, Emily Quinn starts her Ted Talk with “I have a vagina.” But she examines how we place people into boxes labeled “man” and “woman” and what it means to be intersex. Emily discusses natural human variation and the shortcomings of the sex/gender binary, and the harm it does to people.

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I’ve been busy reading other things but was so excited that my library picked up Kate Lister‘s A Curious History of Sex, which was released in February. I’m always impressed when a book surprises me with knowledge, and this one did!  It was funny and quick, and I hope to make time to review it shortly. If I don’t get around to it, I still recommend it!

One of the things about doing a semi-quarterly version of these posts is that I don’t feel the need to pad the posts. I really have a chance to consume some quality media, which doesn’t just make for good recommendations; it also keeps me entertained and informed. I hope these posts do the same for you, and if you think there’s something I ought to recommend or simply enjoy myself, please let me know in the comments!

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Spring 2020 Media Recommendations

July 1st, 2020

I haven’t posted much since April. I had no motivation during the quarantine. I was stressed, and my body reacted strangely. For a brief while, my attention span was too short to do much else than work.

Fortunately, I feel better in most ways and have dived back into my favorite podcasts and discovered new authors. So there are plenty of books, podcasts, and videos that I can recommend for anyone who wants to fill some time or learn more about the world they live in. They’re mostly about sex, but race has played an important role in my media consumption due to current events and my own efforts to read more black authors.

As always, I’d love to hear what you found entertaining, sexy, or provocative in the comments!

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Radiolab’s Molly Webster discusses how the sex chromosomes became ever-so-important in her TED talk.

Misty Gedlinske took on the issue of bisexual erasure in her TEDX talk, and boy did it hit home!

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I don’t have any book suggestions that are related to sex because I’ve been continuing my 2020 goal of reading more black authors. Thus far, I’ve been enjoying Michelle Obama discuss her life in Becoming, which she narrates in the audiobook version.

The New Jim Crow: Mass Incarceration in the Age of Colorblindness is ostensibly about mass incarceration but is really about so much more. Aside from being the best book I read this year, it’s the book on race that I was looking for, having found a few other books a bit basic at this point in my journey; although, others may want to read one of those books before working up to it. In fact, this is the one book I would recommend to everyone about being black in America over any of the others I’ve read this year.

I was hesitant to read Malcolm Gladwell’s Talking to Strangers after hearing some criticism with the way he discussed the Brock Turner case, but I did. The audio version is more than a little pretentious but some of the points he made, especially those about race and policing, have really stuck with me.

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In this entertaining episode of American Sex, Sunny and Ken talk to OnlyFans star Savannah Solo.

Jessie and PJ invited Allie Knox and Kiara Skye on the podcast to discuss the future of sex work and payment processing. They make an excellent example of why sex work is the perfect case study for blockchain payments and talk about developing the technology behind it.

I wasn’t expecting a podcast about “masculinity and memoirs” to make me reflect on some of the mistakes I’ve made in the past, but Tristan and Cooper’s recent discussion on Sex Out Oud Radio did just that.

On the theme of podcasts-I-might-have-skipped-but-I’m-so-glad-I-didn’t comes this podcast about breaking out of the gender binary and its powerful words by ALOK that made me cry and catch my breath in places.

Hopefully, everyone is still thinking about black lives. If you want to know more about the interaction of race and sex work, Phoenix Calida gives the lowdown on Peepshow Podcast.

Tristan eloquently navigates a conversation about blackness, sexuality, and more in her interview of Gene Demby from Codeswitch.

I found the recordings of each of the 16 different sex workers included in this episode of Peepshow Podcast to be incredibly evocative.

Ologies if one of my favorite podcasts, and I’ve been making my way through the archives, so I have several recommendations. Two of them are most recent: Neuroendocrinology (sex & gender) with Daniel Pfau and BlackAFinSTEM, which wasn’t about sex but gave black voices in STEM a chance to speak. You can also check out the sexology episode with ShanBoody and Ali’s talk with Philippa Ribbink about gynecology. Philippa has a great voice and mentions a need for more anatomy education that The Vagina Bible has since provided.

Jad and the crew at Radiolab thought about blackness through the filter of Nina Simone’s music. Incredibly powerful.

I have read two of Emily Nagoski’s books, listened to her own podcast, read her blog, and shared her articles. Yet, she still manages to say things that blow my mind like she did when talking to Nicolette of Sluts and Scholars.

 

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March 2020 Media Recommendations

April 1st, 2020

Welp, I am a fair bit late with this post. I’ve thought about finishing it every day for the last week, but I was never at my laptop when the thought struck. I guess I was too busy enjoying this media to write about it. Oops.

Without further ado..

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Actress Jameela Jamil hosts two episodes of a podcast called The New Age of Consent wherein she discusses the nuances of consent. It’s pretty quick and features some awesome guests.

I’ve spent much of the last week binging Watts Your Safeword. I recently caught an episode of Sexplanations featuring co-host Amp, and while I just do not enjoy Dr. Lindsey as a host, I knew I had to get some more of Amp. Watts Your Safeword is relatively new, so there aren’t that many posts. Amp is joined on air with his daddy Mr. Kristofer, and the two discuss their work in porn as well as kink, among other topics. It’s been a while since I listened to a podcast simply because I enjoy the banter, but I do with this one. Amp is nerdy and punny, and I often find myself laughing at his antics. Several of the episodes have been kinky versions of games, including Kinky Shark Tank. They also tackle more serious and thoughtful topics, but there’s always a joke or pun to be found. I see that a new episode has been posted since I finished the archive, so I need to catch up!

Sunny takes on the issue of COVID-19 in this episode of American Sex featuring Kate Loree. I especially appreciate the comments about the things we all can do to improve our state of minds when the world is in its current state.

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I’m going to recommend a few non-sexy books this month. The last couple that I read about sex fell a bit flat for me.

First up is If I Understood You, Would I Have This Look on My Face?: My Adventures in the Art and Science of Relating and Communicating by Alan Alda. The title is ridiculously long, but the book is not, and I particularly enjoyed hearing Alda narrate his own book. He has such a great voice for it! His ideas really made me think about communication and especially empathy, and I gained so much respect for how he interacts with others.

Samantha Allen’s Real Queer America: LGBT Stories from Red States is a multi-stop road trip to some of the cities that offered the most formative experiences in the former Mormon’s life. Again, I listened to this one and Allen read her own words. Her voice was so vulnerable at times as she spoke about the changing landscape for queer and trans people like herself, even in some traditionally-conservative locations. It simultaneously gave me pause and hope.

Finally, For Small Creatures Such as We: Rituals for Finding Meaning in Our Unlikely World is the new book from Sasha Sagan, daughter of carl. I haven’t finished it, but it’s so incredibly smart and makes me feel connected to a world that’s larger than I am. Like Sasha, I am not religious, but she has thought more conscientiously about the meaning of ritual in our lives. I think many of us could benefit from doing the same, and I cannot complain about feeling closer to Carl through his daughter’s words.

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I also don’t have any videos related to sex to watch

I forgot about this adorable animated documentary about the clitoris. It’s in French, but there are subtitles!

A couple other things struck me this month:

Are y’all familiar with PlutoTV? It’s apparently not new, but I’ve only heard of it in the last couple weeks. Oddly, it was mentioned in several places. I’ve been using it to watch Leverage, which I recommend but like slightly less than I did when it first aired.

This video that illustrates the capabilities of deep fakes just blows my mind.

Mark Rober, who you might know for his exploding package video, demonstrates how germs spread in a more recent video. It’s a good reminder in the time of COVID-19.

DJ Tom Nash discusses adaptability and self-importance among other important ideas in a TED talk that’s less than 10 minutes along and is funny.

So, folks, I clearly need to read and watch more sexy content. Got any recommendations for me? Sound off in the comments!

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lingerie

February 2020 Media Recommendations

February 28th, 2020

This month’s list of recommended media is short and sweet, partially because there wasn’t a lot of media that really spoke to me but partly because those pieces that did speak to me are just so damned incomparable.

First up, we have The Vagina Bible, a tome of a book by OGBYN Jen Gunter who wants to provide medically accurate information to anyone who owns a vagina — and a vulva. You’ll learn more about the specifics in an upcoming review, but it contains a wealth of information that is certainly useful but rarely taught.

The second recommendation is an incredibly powerful and provoking episode of Sluts and Scholars about victims’ rights laws with Norma Buster, the client relations manager at the C.A. Goldberg Victims’ Rights Law Firm and a survivor of revenge porn. It’s a hard listen, and I’ve never been a victim of such heinous actions, so I advise listening with caution. It’s frustrating to learn about the world that cares so little for women, who are so often the victims of such incredible invasions of safety and privacy. But it’s inspiring to learn about those people who are working so diligently to turn the tide.

 

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