Ceramix Pleasure Pottery Dildo No. 4

December 28th, 2013

Ceramix Pleasure Pottery Dildo No. 4
$14.95 from Amazon

I have to get this review written tonight because I will soon be writing my annual “Best of” list, and this dildo will absolutely be on it.

So, here’s the thing. I really like the look of the Ceramix line. It’s all bright colors and fun shapes. Kind of Dr. Seuss. A good friend said it reminded her of Wonderland. Either way, it’s got this whimsical air. Love it. Apparently, I am not alone. My Pipedream rep said they were having trouble keeping these in stock. Fortunately, the good folk over at PinkCherry were able to send one over.

Now, the only other ceramic toy I’ve used was a vibrator, so it had a bit more wait than this dildo. The dildo is hollow and it just feels so light. It’s like the Krispy Kreme donut of dildos. Almost more air than anything else. Yes, it’s also delicious. I will get there.

There polka dots on the #4 are slightly raised. I can feel them with my hand. I don’t think this adds any vaginal sensation. It’s slick overall and, as you can see from the photos, there are definitely some light bulges.

So this is a hollowed out dildo and there’s a hole at the bottom that’s plugged with stopper. It’s removable so that you can put warm or cold water in it for temperature. At first, I thought this was a gimmick.

I was fucking wrong.

However, it is annoying. It’s in there really well. I couldn’t pry it out with my fingers or nails. I had to grab a pair of tweezers. It needs to be secure so that water doesn’t get all over your bed, but it’s so secure that you definitely need to plan on playtime with this dildo. It’s not a spur-of-the-moment thing.

So once I got it removed, I did will it with warm water. Of course, this adds to the weight a bit, but it’s nothing like metal. In fact, I rather disliked the weight of the Pure Wand. I also disliked how hot it got after usage. I generally prefer the feel of something cool against my labia, that warms up only slightly. I love glass.

But the way that the ceramic warms from the inside out with this method has won me over. The heat reminds me of sex with a real, live cock. Of course. the rigidity is all wrong, but is just feels awesome, not foreign. This alone made me really enjoy the feeling of this dildo. Instead of using it to squirt or thrust, I simply enjoyed the way it felt while inserted and using another vibe on my clit. I don’t think it would have mattered which vibrator I was using externally because cumming around this dildo — three times — felt amazing.

The size didn’t matter but for posterity, it has a slightly curved head and a base that makes it safe for anal. You can insert 6 inches, and this is a medium-size dildo with a maximum diameter of 1.5″.

It’s been a long time since I’ve fallen in love with a sex toy like this. I absolutely recommend that you try something in this line if not the Pleasure Pottery Dildo No. 4. There are vibrators and plugs, each with their own stunning design.

6 Comments

Categories: Dildos, Reviews

D.1 Larvikite Stone Dildo

November 12th, 2013

D.1 Larvikite Stone Dildo

D.1 Larvikite Stone Dildo
$100.00 from Tabu Toys

You know how it takes you forever to write a post when you feel like a sex toy is just mediocre? Yea, that wasn’t the case with the D1 stone dildo. In fact, it’s the exact opposite. I liked it so much from the very beginning that I knew I wouldn’t be able to express it well enough.

It’s just that good.

It’s just that gorgeous, too. I took a photo almost immediately, which I posted to Twitter. There is this subtle blue texture to the stone that probably makes it the most attractive toy I’ve ever used. Sure, I’ve joked about keeping things on the mantle, but I mean it with this one.

You wanna come over and look at my dildo? Okay, but don’t touch because it’s mine.

The website describes it as “blue pearl,” but it’s almost got this smokey appearance. I’m sure that every dildo looks just a little bit different because of the material. Black Moonstone is something I’m sad not to have known before. The product description reads as follows:

a blue-gray hue with flecks of black and silvery, light-blue reflections that catch the light.

I kind of put off using this dildo for the first time because I was afraid it was going to be all form and no function. Yes, I liked the way it looked in my hands, but what if that’s all it was?

Fortunately, that’s not the case at all! In fact, I loved if. The heft and rigidity are perfect. It’s compact and not unwieldy. There’s a balance that makes it easy to use. G-spot aficionados will appreciate the gentle curve. It took literally zero effort to reach my G-spot. The pressure I was able to achieve made me squirt nearly instantly. I won’t promise thecar same to you but this is one effective dildo for me because I know that my G-spot likes pressure. The D1 didn’t disappoint.

You know another thing that I like? The packaging. Not because it’s all sort of fancy but because it’s a simply cardboard box that you can recycle. The focus is on the luxury toy, and that’s what I like. Seriously. Lelo needs to get on board with this. There’s supposed to be an included storage pouch, but I totally threw it away by accident if there is. Oops. I guess I was too busy eyeing up the stone.

Now, this dildo is also available in a bright pink silicone. However, the stone version costs less than $20 more, and I think that this is probably the better deal. If you don’t think you’ll like the weight, go ahead and opt for silicone, but I absolutely adore the stone dildo. And, let’s be honest, it’s far better looking.

While I haven’t handled the silicone version to compare, I feel at those the “creases” would feel sharper with that material. Stone is ungiving — and porous, yay! — but the ridges seem smoother than they would with silicone. I’ve used silicone with creases like that and they were painful.

I wasn’t worried about stone being too hard because I love glass. However, the one end definitely comes to more of a point, so you’ll want to be careful when inserting it. Unlike most glass dildos, the texture is smooth and slick all the way. It’s easy to insert with a little lube, and you can choose to use either end if you want. Size-wise, you’re looking at 8 inches — plenty to stimulate the G-spot and control the toy. However, I do find the squared end to be better for grasping. The pointed end might slip out of your hand if it’s covered in lube.

The other end is a bit more squared off, which might not be everyone’s cup of tea. The pointed end is also slightly narrower, and rigid materials like stone can often feel larger than they actually are. Of course, you hopefully know this and you want a toy like this one, which will last you forever. This toy falls to in the medium range. The description says the diameter is just under 1.5 inches, but my measurements come up a bit smaller than that. The squared end has a diameter of under 1.35 inches, but it’s not perfectly round. The pointed end is more like 1.20 inches.

Like glass, stone is cool to the touch. You may warm it with water, but it seems to stay cooler than metal, for example. I like this, but you may not be such a fan. Not every material it for every person.

Care-wise, you can wash it clean. The packaging claims it could break if dropped on the floor. I’d be extra careful with this beauty.

So where does this leave me in this review?

Would it be too cheesy for me to tell you to go get laid?

Yea, I’m going to do it anyway.

Get laid.

 

8 Comments

Categories: Dildos, Reviews

Maia Astral D3 Dong

May 12th, 2013

Maia Astral D3 Dong

Maia Astral D3 Dong
$38.29 from Of Sex and Love Store

This toy has been rebranded to the KENDALL Dong.

I’m still not sure about the naming over at Maia toys. I think perhaps something more memorable would help them out, and I kind of hate the word “dong.” But who doesn’t?

So this is the only dildo I was able to review for the company, but it’s also my favorite of the items that they sent me. The blue, or astral, is a medium sky blue. I also had a medium lavender, which I donated to a friend in need. For some reason, the box photos show a rather shiny finish, but this isn’t the case. This dildo has a satiny smooth exterior, which feels just great in my hand. It also picks up lint, but man does it feel good when I grasp it.

The shape is a bit more difficult to describe. It looks “twisted” but this dildo actually has ridges. If you’re looking at it from the side, they angle downward. There are four ridges, and while each is wide, they’re not that far off the shaft. However, you can still feel them quite well. If the contoured head, which reminds me of a number of Tantus dildos, isn’t enough to stimulated the G-spot or whichever spot you’re aiming for, the ridges will.

There is the slightest — and I mean slightest — G-spot curve. I find that the head works well enough for me, and the combination of the ridges and head should work well for most people. However, I can’t guarantee it. This thing is almost seamless. It’s super smooth, which is awesome.

The area around those ridges is the most dense of the entire toy. There’s some give, but its mostly around the thinner part of the toy, above and below the area where the shaft is. All in all, I thought I wouldn’t like the size + shape + firmness, but I kind of fucking love it. It’s simple yet effective. It doesn’t require much from me, that’s awesome stuff, man.

IMAG0455To give you a better idea of size, we’re talking about 7.25 insertable inches, with a bit more length thanks to the suction cup, which sucks a lot.. in a good way. The widest part of the head has a diameter of 2 inches, but it’s oblong and narrower when you turn the dildo. Around the widest ridge, we’re talking about 1.9″. This dildo is on the larger end, and while it’s not the biggest toy you could ever play with, it’s certainly filling. The valleys on the shaft are probably 1.65″ wide or so, while it narrows to about 1.5 inches right below the head. This might not the dildo for the feint of heart or newbies.

It’s definitely the right toy for someone who likes bright colors, filling sensation and the ability to use it on a hard surface. Hey, that isn’t my thing, but there’s no judging thing. I find the suction cup provides an interesting hand hold that’s squishy and easy on the write. I like this, because the size makes it a little on the heftier side.

No matter how you use this one, you’ll need to wash it wish soap and water to rinse off any pesky dirt, lint or, as in my case, cat fur. Like every other Maia toy, this comes with a storage bag. It’s bright blue, to match the dildo, and soft and stretchy. Of course, you could store this with like material without worrying about reactions, but you’ll want to avoid silicone lube reactions if you like it.

I’ve seen this ranging from $27 to $35, and that’s a fucking awesome price. Plus, it comes in that windowed box. I like those. You know what? Go buy it, now.

3 Comments

Categories: Dildos, Reviews

Icicles No. 39

February 22nd, 2013

Icicles No. 39

Icicles No. 39
$25.02 from Of Sex and Love store

I have written many reviews for underpowered, overpriced, poor-quality and other sex toys with simply poor designs. I’ve had defects, but I’ve never had one break on me, despite the fact that I’ve reviewed more than my fair share of glass dildos over the years. What makes this even worse is that this dildo broke before I was technically able to use it. I took a picture and put the dildo away for a while.

Then, I got it out and went to wash it. While it was under the stream of water already in the basin of the sink, fell a few inches and broke. The flat ring of the handle broke off from the corkwscrew shaft. A tiny piece chipped and fell down my drain, so while I can piece these back together and maybe even super glue it, I don’t think it’s worth dealing with.

Now, it didn’t shatter or break in use, but I’ve dropped more than one piece of glass into my sink and even on the floor without it breaking on me. While this dildo broke as the thinnest point, I still feel it warrants discussion. Is this an issue with the dildo I received? Is it a problem with this particular design because the ring is so narrow? Or are Icicles dildos in general something we should stay away from? I don’t want to write them off entirely, but this makes me wary.

Icicles 39 Handle Broken From Shaft

Before it broke, Icicles 39 really was gorgeous. The black glass is opaque. It’s super shiny and sleek. The corkscrew design is unique and it wasn’t hard to take a decent picture before it broke.

Pipedream is really trying to up their game. My dildo came in a foam insert in a long, narrow box. There’s a magnetic “flap” that you open to see a window surrounded by a black-on-black pattern. It’s all very sophisticated. Sadly, it’s all for show because Pipedream includes no storage and..

The dildo really didn’t work for me. Yes, I still use it — carefully — after it broke. I found the shape to be noticeable but not in a way that was especially pleasurable. The problem with it is that it’s just so narrow. I really had to press the straight shaft to stimulate my G-spot and this was due to the narrowness of this. While this makes it a good dildo for people who like smaller toys, it’s going to wind up disappointing size queens. I don’t even consider myself one of those, but this thing is a maximum of 1″ or so and it starts around half that. With 6″ or so insertable, the taper is super gradual, but the lack of girth and curve means it’s less than ideal for me personally.

So, this went in the trash for obvious reasons, but if you were to buy this, cleaning is a breeze. Storage? Well, you want something padded, that’s for sure.

I’m wary of quality, but I think someone could like this dildo. It’s just not me.

5 Comments

Categories: Dildos, Reviews

Star Delight Clear Dildo [Flash Review]

February 19th, 2013

Star Delight Clear Dildo

Star Delight Clear Dildo

It appears that this toy is no longer available.

My first Crystal Delights dildo was a success, but I feel like I would have enjoyed it more had I been able to use it on someone else. The pretty Swarovski jewels at the end are totally lost on me, unless I display it as a piece of art in my living room. I just might. Although, the blue almost exactly matches my nails.

The Star Delight specifically is a glass dildo with a contoured head and bulges on the shaft. The flared based makes it pretty safe for anal, and while the shaft lacks any sort of G-spot curve, the contoured head was enough to make me squirt within minutes. The bulbs are impossible to ignore, but I slightly prefer ridges for actual pleasure. Six inches to thrust with is plenty, and the glass has a heft to it that I enjoy.

The base makes it easy to hold, and I was able to insert this 1.4-inch dildo with no warm-up and a little lube. Cleaning is easy no matter how you do it, and Crystal Delights includes this storage pouch, which I just love. It’s like a burrito of happiness.

Good dildo? Yes. Better than any I’ve tried before? No? Prettier? Why don’t you come find out.

Crystal Delights Storage Pouch

 

2 Comments

Categories: Dildos, Reviews

Fetish Fantasy Elite 10″ Dildo

January 14th, 2013

Fetish Fantasy Elite 10" Dildo

Fetish Fantasy Elite 10" Dildo

This is an archived review for a discontinued product.

Where do I start with this review other than to say it looks like a giant unicorn horn? And giant is the keyword here. It’s a whopping ten inches long. It’s a heavy hunk of silicone that you likely won’t use every time you’re having sex or going for a solo session, but it does have its uses. For example, the length makes it ideal for strapon play when angles and bodies mean short dildos just won’t cut it. The slight curve at the end could definitely be used for G-spot stimulation, and the shaft isn’t going to bend or give during intense thrusting.

It’s still a really large toy, however. It’s definitely meant to be used with a strap-on, and I’d recommend a nice, tight one to keep it from pulling down too much given the size and weight. And, in fact, Pipedream does offer a few strap-ons that you might test this with. The only one I currently own is the Sasha harness, which I didn’t much love. With a bit of pulling and prodding, this dildo does fit into the Sasha harness. Even though that harness is quite snug, the dildo hangs down. It’s not perky and erect like some people might prefer. I personally find it a little heavy for my tastes. I think this could easily be solved by hollowing out at least part of the dildo — this also gives you room to insert a bullet if you’d like.

As to whether this one will work with your harness, the Fetish Fantasy Elite 10″ Dildo will need a 1.75″ O-ring. At the base, the shaft goes in slightly, so it’s less wide than the widest point, which is just under 2″ in diameter. This makes this dildo pretty large. Of course, I can’t really imagine someone inserting the entire thing. Assuming you insert about six inches, the diameter at that point is over 1.75″ .

The thickness on this one gradually increases. The head starts out at just 1.27 inches; however, it reaches 1.5 inches pretty quickly. If you aren’t a size queen, then you could simply insert the tip for G-spot stimulation. It works well enough for me. Of course, then this really wouldn’t be the toy for you.

The silicone of this dildo does have a lot of drag, so water based lube is your friend. I’m not a big fan of toys that need quite so much lube. I also slightly prefer the velvety finished of some silicone toys. As for the wrapped design? It looks pretty and really lends a fantastic element to the appearance but isn’t something that sets me over the edge.

It collects lint like crazy, so a healthy soap and water rinse is necessary even before storage — unless you store it in a plastic bag. The silicone feels pretty firm and dense; although, I can slightly bend the head a few degrees to either side. However, the lack of G-spot curve means this might not be the best vaginal didlo. The same goes for you if you’re looking to use it for prostate stimulation.

One aspect that I do like is the base, which will work as a suction cup if you’re not using this with a strap-on. Of course, there are practicality issues to consider, but if you’re into mounting your toys, then the option is there.

So, if you love silicone and large dildos, if you want to feel powerful and really take your partner without a serious need for a curved toy, this might be up your alley. If you’re unsure for any reason, I’d pass it up.

Like most Fetish Fantasy products, this one comes with a silicone mask. And it’s a piece of crap. Silicone is really staticy and linty, so your hair will stick to it and pull. The mask runs really small. It pulls uncomfortable over my eyes even when it’s adjusted to the loosest setting. Plus, the shape doesn’t do much to block light or vision at all. I am still a proponent of my Kinklab leather blindfold and would recommend it a thousand times over this one.

Still, it’s a solid toy with a minimal seam and much better quality than other Pipedream products I’ve tried in the past. I would probably consider something a little smaller from them in the future.

10 Comments

Categories: Dildos, Reviews

Lovehoney Galaxy Orgasmic Glass Dildo

November 20th, 2012

This is an archived review. Lovehoney no longer makes this glass dildo.

Do yourself a favor and read up on glass dildo safety before making any purchases.

Lovehoney Galaxy Orgasmic Glass Dildo


Sometimes, something about a toy just makes me go “meh.” It might be that it’s a different size or color in person. Maybe I’ve used something too similar in the past. It might be less strong. Whatever the case, I felt like this with the Galaxy Dildo. It looks swirled with smoke in the product images, but I was less impressed with it in person. Another notable difference is the “kink” or hook in the neck, right below the head.

So, the lines are stark black and not smokey in person. It’s kind of.. amateur. I don’t know. It stands out too much from the clear glass shaft. I’d like to see the lines blurred more. That would appeal to my sense of aesthetics a little more.

Anyway, the design also seemed disappointing because it’s just so thin and smooth. I generally prefer some sort of texture on my glass. However, this dildo did surprise me in use because of the little hook beneath the head. It actually proved perfect for stimulating my G-spot. I was able to come in something like six strokes. So even though I expected little from the dildo, and it didn’t look beautiful, it did do its job. The head adds to the sensation only in that the bulge is a good end to the hook. It provides leverage.

There’s nothing entirely fantastic about the specs of this one. It’s glass, so it’s heavy, is suitable for temperature play and doesn’t take much lube. Clean is just as easy, and the widened base makes it safe for anal play and possibly compatible with a harness. It’s also good for grasping. The diameter is just over 1″, and the dildo is perfectly round the entire length through save for the head. The bulbous head is less than 1.5″ wide, which makes this a good choice for anyone who doesn’t like giant toys. I was barely warmed up and didn’t need a whole lot of lube. I love that about glass. Of course, as glass, this dildo is less forgiving and feels a little larger than softer toys.

Some might enjoy the contoured head for clitoral stimulation. That’s not really my thing. I’m sure many people will find the dildo to be more attractive than I do, too.

Lovehoney packages this with a storage pouch made of velour. It cinches closed but it’s barely longer than the 7.25″ dildo. I would really like to see another half of inch in length for the pouch to be ideal. The velour is thicker than satin, but it’s not like an Otterbox case for your dildo.

I feel like I should have more to say about this toy, but I don’t. It’s simple. No frills. You can heat it up or cool it down, but I never do. I feel like it might be just a bit overpriced, to be honest. I’ve used cheaper glass toys that looked as nice as they worked, but maybe I’m too obsessed with looks. I mean, I am the chick whose Layaspot just died and will only consider a replacement in the right colors.

3 Comments

Categories: Dildos, Reviews

Image © MisterUnlucky; used with permission.