Respect, and how not to earn it

February 1st, 2009

A while ago (months, I guess) I became a member of TooTimid’s forums. I had found the site a while back when looking for sites which use sex toy reviewers (I applied, twice, and heard nothing back). I took a bit to get around to joining the forums and I found a fairly active community which was sex positive if not as contemporary as some. I enjoyed it, nonetheless.

After joining, I put my blog URL in my signature. I soon received a private message from the person who I assume is the site owner which said I could not have the link in my signature but it would remain in my profile. I was fine with this.

Recently, I went to update sometihng else my profile and realized my URL had been removed; I can only assume this happened back when I first joined and I had not realized it. I updated my information, added my URL back in and soon received another private message. The owner (again, my assumption) thanked me for being an active part of the community but said I could not have the URL in my profile and hoped I understood.

I did not and I very politely responded as such. I did not see why I could not link to my personal blog in my profile and, if he did not want that happening, he should edit the profile fields so it could not be entered. If he was worried about competition, I recommended increasing Too Timid’s reach and reputation as an online sex shop and community rather than being paranoid about personal blogs. I strongly suggested they reconsider what I think of as a ridiculous policy. I heard no response.

In fact, I have been suspended, without notification until “Dec 27 4746, 08:14 AM.” I can only assume that, by this time, I will be dead and Too Timid will be long gone as well. In fact, I doubt any humans will remain but I digress.

Rather than being mature, the powers that be chose to suspend an active and helpful member. I joined despite the fact that they ignored my requests to be a reviewer and gave my input to other members, helping them as I could. All I asked was to fill out a field in my profile which was, for lack of a better term, fill-outable.

This suspension really shows TooTimid’s true colours. This is not a company or site which supports community, in my mind. This is not how you spread the word of your company and make yourself viewed as a team player. This is not how you boost your reputation. No, this is how you alienate those who have the power to spread the word about your site (which TooTimid does seem to need; it’s not very well known despite the fact that it seems to have an active community and resources on its site). This is how you show that you are so insecure about what you’re selling that you must try to censor the mere mention of potential competition.

In fact, rather than ask how I think TooTimid might strengthen its public appearance or to do a link exchange, I was essentially banned without valid reason. It seems to me that not allowing for constructive criticism gets you nowhere fast. I can name quite a few historical figures who saw defeat because of this tactic.

Shortly before this happened, I was contacted by TooTimid on Twitter to be a reviewer (but no follow-up contact was made). I know I was not the only one. I had thought it was a step in the direction of community-mindedness. However, after this, I must caution anyone who might choose to review for or affiliate with Too Timid in any fashion. If this is how they treat an active community member, I am not sure how they would treat anyone else. If they is how they deal with a nonserious issue, I wonder what approach they will take with serious issues customers, reviewers and community members may have.

I cannot say the same for TooTimid, and while I also cannot force anyone to decline an opportunity (nor would I think any less of anyone who does review with them), I can warn that TooTimid has a long way to go before they are a company I can respect.

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Woe is me!

January 28th, 2009

Feel free to pity me when you read my review of the Senso 6 Pak. I know I do.

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Bijoux Indiscrets cosmetics for better sex

System Jo H2O

January 26th, 2009

System JO H2O
9.99 from Of Sex and Love Store

System Jo H2O is a water-based lubricant that aims to mimic the slickness of silicone-based lubricants while remaining odorless, tasteless, and tack-free. In these pursuits, I think System Jo H20 has performed admirably.

Packaged in a clear bottle with a fairly minimal silver and blue design, System Jo H2O comes off a bit futuristic to me. It’s not entirely discreet, nor does it scream “lube.” A person would likely be able to determine just what this bottle contains by its general shape but it’s not so gaudy that it would be necessarily embarrassing to have out. Complete with the narrow, push-top style cap, as opposed to the flip-top styles of many lubes, I find using this lube less messy. The cap style also helps to control how much lube is dispensed and I feel it’s very secure when closed; flip tops tend to leak if a bottle should tip. However, it’s not as easy to use as a pump.

When it comes down to it, System Jo H2O is a very good water based lube. It’s not as thick as some I’ve used, like ID Glide, so it may not be great for anal sex (System Jo does have an anal lube as well). However, it is very slippery and feels more like silicone lube. Despite being a bit thin, I’ve had positive experiences with it so far. It’s all I’ve used when inserting my rather well-endowed Passion Wave Stimulator, which has a circumference of 5 1/4″. This is definitely bigger than any other toy or penis I play with, so I feel confident that System Jo H2O will meet all my needs.

Although my sessions with the Passion Wave tend to be quick, they are hard and heavy with many quick thrusts. This lube has worked wonderfully. I have not had to reapply any time I have previously used it. Furthermore, the application doesn’t leave my hands sticky and goopy. This is one lube that comes through on its promises that it will not be tacky. For review purposes, I applied lube to my palm and rubbed my hands together quickly until the lube wore away. While it did not absorb completely – my hands felt slick, still – it did not become dry, clumpy or uncomfortable. I would recommend washing away any excess lube or the remains of the lube after play (soap and water will do the trick).

I have not experienced any negative results with System Jo H2O. It has been odorless and tasteless, as advertised. Although there is no ingredient list on the bottle except for Vitamin E (or on the website, it seems), I have had no bad reactions.

System JO H2O has proven to be a slippery lubricant that rises above other water-based lubes. It contains no oils or silicone, making it perfect for play with toys or partners, and it’s completely safe for use with latex condoms. The System Jo line of lubricants includes warming, and anal lube as well. Based on the high performance of System Jo H2O, I would likely consider System Jo over other lubricants if I were shopping, and I will probably stick to System JO H2O when it comes to water-based lubes..

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Make Me Cum Clit Sensitizer

January 26th, 2009

Make Me Cum Clit Sensitizer
$7.46 from Amazon

I was shopping Adam and Eve when I spotted this product and figured it might make things a little more interesting. Who doesn’t desire more orgasms? However, Adam and Eve’s Make Me Cum clit sensitizing gel did not.. make me cum. I cannot say that it did not aid in this pursuit, but if it did, its effects were not obvious enough for me to say that it’s a good investment.

Make me cum is a clear gel that comes in a 1/2-ounce jar, and for what it does, I find the price tag of $9.95 to a bit much. I mean, this jar is just small. I wasn’t expecting anything huge, but I did not realize I was paying so much for so little. It’s about the same size as those small jars of eye cream. You’re not getting much.

With that said, you don’t exactly use a whole lot. I usually dab my finger in the jar once or twice, then rub the gel around my clit. There was a faint medicinal scent that wasn’t necessarily unpleasant, and neither smell nor taste has ever been noticeable to my husband when I applied the gel.

The active ingredient of which is L-Argenine, which is:

an amino acid that has numerous functions in the body. It helps the body get rid of ammonia (a waste product), is used to make compounds in the body such creatine, L-glutamate, and L-proline, and can be converted to glucose and glycogen if needed.

L-arginine is used to make the nitric oxide, a compound in the body that relaxes blood vessels. Preliminary studies have found that L-arginine may help with conditions that improve when blood vessels are relaxed (called vasodilation), such as atherosclerosis, erectile dysfunction, and intermittent claudication.

So I would assume that applying this topically would loosen up muscles in the clitoral area, allowing blood flow to my clit to increase. Thus, my clitoris would be more erect and more sensitive. The science makes sense, but just because my clitoris is more engorged does not necessarily make anything more pleasurable or guarantee more orgasms.

Note that l’arginine may trigger herpes outbreaks so you may want to pass over this product if you or your partner have oral or genital herpes.

I have used this before masturbation and sex. I like the idea of applying the gel because I’m anticipating sex. It makes me feel a little naughty like I have a little secret that no one else knows. I become more aware of my sexuality, but I think it’s more placebo effect than the result of this clit sensitizer.

Once I apply this gel, I either feel nothing at all or a general sort of heat happening around my clit. Now, I suppose this means that the gel is working and blood is rushing to my clit, but the heat is more unpleasant than pleasant. I don’t feel particularly aroused or more sensitive, but some stimuli do seem to be a bit more intense.

But perhaps the big test of success here should be whether or not I do experience an increase in the “frequency of orgasm” as the jar states. I have to say that I have experienced mixed results, and it is a bit difficult to pin the success of failure or orgasm on this gel alone or on surrounding circumstances.

About half the times I used this gel, I did feel like I had a better orgasm. The times that come to mind were also more pleasurable sexually intimate experiences in general, so that may have increased my pleasure more than this jar. Even with better orgasms, they were not easier, and I would assume that a product that induces more orgasms should also make them easier to achieve. Otherwise, where exactly does “more frequent” come into play?

The rest of the time, there was no discernible effect when it came to the quality or frequency of orgasm. Period. These were usually the times when I also felt no stimulation from the gel after application.

The bottom line is that this is an overpriced product, and its main strength is the placebo effect. If you want, you can let yourself think this product is awakening your clit. If this gel did anything at all, it made my clit feel warmer and may have increased the enjoyability of my orgasms. However, I cannot say it did so for a fact. Furthermore, I have no conclusive evidence that Make Me Cum clit sensitizer increased the frequency of my orgasm. As for the advertised purpose of this product, I would call it a failure, and I cannot recommend it to anyone else.

If you’re interested in similar products, check out my review for one by Intimate Earth.

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Devine Toy Box in Wine with Lace Overlay

January 25th, 2009

Devine Toy Box

This is an archived review of a discontinued product.

When I first saw this toy storage container from Devine Toys, I fell in love. It was exactly my style and the red with black lace was gorgeous. It looked classy with perhaps a touch of gothic style, well made and the ability to lock away my most personal items from prying eyes was definitely a plus.

When it arrived, the shipping box was smaller than I expected, but there was not a lot of wasted space or packaging. The Devine Toy box comes with some promotional material as well as a sample of Afterglow wipes which are made by the same company. One of the flyers is folded in three parts, and with some organizational creativity, you see a different message depending on whether or not the flaps are open or closed. The inside of the flyer includes information about Devine products, and the back introduces Devine’s “new” Afterglow wipes. Another promotional piece focuses on the Afterglow wipes themselves.

Lockable Sex Toy CaseThe Devine Toy box, as described in the flyer, is 10″ by 5″ by 5″ and made of faux leather. There are six style options total, 2 of which are made with lace, including mine. (The other colour listed is purple but I have seen blue so I wonder if it has been discontinued).

The lace parts seem to be sort of pillowy and I suspect have another layer of fabric and foam beneath the fabric which is visible. Black lace is laid over red fabric on the top, back and front panel which folds over and through which a small metal loop is placed to lock this box. When the box is opened, the top does not fall all the way back. Rather, it’s held open with a ribbon sewn into the inside of the box which is lined with a red satin material.

The rest of the box (top, bottom, front and sides) and is made of a very nice faux leather. On the bottom of the right side, toward the back, the Devine logo is stamped/etched into the material but this is not overly noticeable nor does it take away from the appearance of the box.

Put it all together and you have a fine looking storage solution for your sex toys. In fact, I was really blown away by the aesthetic appeal of this piece. It was the main reason I wanted it and I certainly wasn’t let down when I gazed at it, face to face. My husband was even impressed and it was immediately obvious that this box would not be shoved under the bed nor tucked in the closet. Its size and appearance make it perfect to sit atop a bedside table, and the lock provides extra security if that’s an issue.

The padlock and 2 keys Devine provides with this toy box are a polished silvery metal which matches the hardware o the box itself. The flyer depicts the Devine logo on the lock, but this is not true. This set isn’t exactly an impenetrable force. I was able to pick the lock with 2 paperclips and the keys are rather generic. The bad news about this is that it means it doesn’t take a lot of effort to break into your toy box. If security is an issue. I would buy a stronger lock (although not all sizes may fit) The good news is, if you lose the keys, it doesn’t take a lot of effort to break into your toy box.

Lockable Sex Toy Case And losing these keys is probably easier than I’d like it to be. Although there are holes in the keys so that they can be slid onto your keyring, they’re rather small. I found it more difficult than usual to slide the tiny key onto my keyring and think a necklace or ball chain might be a better option especially because a smaller key becomes a little hard to use on a ring full of keys.

Lock and keys aside, because I honestly may never use them besides for show, I really enjoy this box. It works perfectly on my nightstand. Now, this isn’t the box you used to store every toy you use, nor is it the box you cram as full as you can. No, this is the box you use to display and keep the best of your collection close at hand for those moments, both expected and unexpected. It will have a permanent home next to my bed.

In order to easily access all my toys, I do not want to overload the Devine storage box. I have only one layer of items in it, save for a packet of toy wipes, which move easily out of the way. I can comfortably fit these items inside the box:

Lockable Sex Toy Case I think this is a fair assortment of toys to always have at hand. If the box were just a tad larger, I could fit my Miracle Massager in it but I am only a bit disappointed. The Devine toy box will also not fit taller bottles of lube and bigger vibrators and dildos comfortably, but this is okay for me. The one reservation I do have is I’m not sure how sturdy the ribbon that holds the top of the box is, and even its existence is a bit sketchy. I am constantly pulling the box open too far because I forgot about the ribbon, and I think I could break the ribbon or possibly damage the inside lining. I personally wouldn’t mind if the top of the box went further back, so I don’t think the ribbon is necessary.

However, that concern was misguided because while the ribbon has remained intact, the lock mechanism has come apart, and I cannot fix it because I lost some of the tiny pieces. This means I cannot fully close the box, although it still works well on my nightstand. I just wish that it was in pristine condition. Nevertheless, I’ll keep it because it’s no longer available.

 

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Categories: Reviews, Storage
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Clone A Willy Review

January 22nd, 2009

Earlier today, I posted my 3 review in the 7 in 7 streak of the Glow in the Dark Clone A Willy Kit.

I had never really gave much thought to this until last week when I jokingly told me husband we should clone his cock because he would be going away for several months. I was more than surprised when he agreed and we headed down to the local sex shop but it had every version of the Clone a Willy Kit but the one I wanted (the original, I suppose it is). I eventually wound up making the purchase online.


Read more..

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Sun Kissed Skinny Dip Massage Candle

January 21st, 2009

Sun Kissed Massage Candle
$15.99 from Amazon

Even as I write this, the smell of the Suntouched Massage Candle is wafting through the air, gently delighting my nose. This soft waxed candle is made of natural products such as soybean and coconut oil, hemp and Vitamin E. You can rest assured nothing was tested on animals, making this a perfect product for those who are ecologically and environmentally aware. Because this candle burns at a lower temperature than regular candles, it’s suitable for body massages without being uncomfortable.

Nestled in a plain tin with lid (which fits perfectly under the tin when not in use, so you needn’t worry about misplacing it) and provided with a small, plastic spoon to aid in application, this is an all-in-one atmosphere setter.

My favorite aspect of this is the scent, which is not described on the package itself. TabuToys describes the Skinny Dip scent as vanilla. Initially, I thought it had a hint of vanilla, and it definitely reminded me of a creamsicle, so it’s no wonder I like the smell. I am all about sweet! The Earthly Body site describes it as vanilla and cotton candy on other Skinny Dip products, but the description is conspicuously missing from the packaging and the Skinny Dip page itself.

Scent aside, this is a very soft waxed candle, and I can easily leave an impression by pressing my finger into the wax. It melts rather quickly—I was able to use the melted liquid for massage about 5 – 10 minutes after I lit it. I have even rubbed some solid wax on my skin as a moisturizer. However, give it some time to melt for an actual massage liquid.

I lit this candle, as well as others around the bedroom, and a soft glow enveloped us. It was a romantic and sensual setting and the scent in the air was heavenly. Although I had other scented candles lit and I have both an air freshener and reed diffuser in our room, the massage candle really stood out scent-wise. Of course, it was closest to us, but this is powerfully, but not obnoxiously, perfumed. I imagine having a lid for the tin helps to lengthen the shelf life of the scent and prevents the candle from drying out.

My husband was worried about the wax being too hot, but the soft candle melted at a very reasonable temperature. I dipped my fingers in the wax pool while the candle was still lit (carefully, of course), and it wasn’t uncomfortable at all. We also used the candle by pouring it directly on the skin and my husband used the application spoon, but I found that to be less useful than you might think because it’s small and rather flimsy. So I was worried about dripping massage oil on the bed and floor when moving the spoon from candle to skin. Overall, I thought the best way to apply the oil was using my own hands.

Coupled together, the massage oil and scented candle made for a very sensual experience. I used the oil to rub down my husband’s arms, shoulders, and back, and it was a very nice product. I could easily feel the moisturizer, which is a recommended use for this massage candle. My hands glided easily, and the oil never became sticky, goopy, or dry. It rubbed easily into the skin, and neither of us felt the need to wash it off afterward. In fact, this might be a good product to dab on your skin before going out (or staying in!) to add just a little bit of allure.

I didn’t give the longest massage (perhaps 15 minutes?), but a little did go a long way. I dipped my fingers in the oil twice, initially, and that lasted me fine. Longer massages may require more oil or a reapplication, but I definitely think this worked more efficiently than other massage products we have used.

Sadly, I like this candle so much that I will be burning it just so smell it. Even just having it lit while we were intimate heightened the mood in the room deliciously, and I find myself occasionally just smelling the candle.

The one thing I did notice is that the wick needs to be constantly trimmed which I should do with all my candles but usually don’t. The Sun Kissed Vanilla Massage Candle will be one I keep up on maintenance because I really have no need for soot and ash when it comes to massaging. There is already a bit of discoloration to the candle, so I will have to be more vigilant in the future.

Overall, this was an excellent product. It was a good candle, an excellent massage cream, and a quality moisturizer, which will definitely add something extra to your intimate times.

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Image © MisterUnlucky; used with permission.