The Best and Worst of 2019

December 30th, 2019

In previous years my best — and worst of — lists included multiple sex toys. In 2019, I reviewed mostly books and not that many of them. So you’ll find a handful of them on this list along with only one sex toy!

Turned On Science, Sex and Robots

Sex meets tech in this entertaining and informative book by Kate Devlin

The first book I’ll recommend is Revolting Prostitutes, which examines the different legal frameworks and how those affect sex workers. It also explains how sex workers’ rights are ultimately women’s rights. If you want to learn more about how legalizing or decriminalizing sex work plays out, this is the book for you!

While I wasn’t intending to review Screwed, it wound up being a fast read that I enjoyed as well as a compelling argument that looked into the ways that society fails women when it comes to sex.

I thought I knew a lot about the menstrual cycle, but Heavy Flow explained some things that weren’t quite clear and helped paint a picture of menstruation as part of the larger picture and a person’s life and not just compartmentalized, relegated to exist only for 4-7 days out of the month.

If you want to know the state of sex robots and contemplate what this means for you, then I cannot recommend Turned On enough. It’s witty and wise and truly enjoyable to read.

I only reviewed a few sex toys this year, and only one is worth recommending. The revamped Laya II is stronger than the first Laya II and allowed me to enjoy Fun Factory’s Laya line once more.

On the other hand, Vibease and its terrible audio erotica failed to please. And months later, I am still struggling to get Coochy Plus shaving cream out of the broken pump bottle it came in.

Interestingly, while I had a somewhat favorable opinion of Mimi Soft when I reviewed it at the beginning of the year, I actually forgot I even tried it. Oops!

 

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2013 in Review

January 5th, 2014

This might be the third year in a row that I’ve posted a best of list. I figured I wouldn’t just do the wonderful toys but provide you with some of the strange and disappointing, too.  I’ll have to fudge the lines of “this year” a bit. I must have written last year’s a little early because there were two reviews in December 2012 that didn’t make it on the list. I waited until January for this post because I really wanted to get one last review in, so let’s start there.

D.1 stone dildo

D.1 stone dildo

I liked the design but expected the Ceramix Pleasure Pottery Dildo No. 4 to be a gimmick with its hollow inside for warm. But warming this dildo up far surpassed my expectations. It’s one of the few dildos that I’ve ever used twice, and I think that says a lot.

I’ve been pimping out the Jimmyjane Form 6 G3 all this year even though it was one of those reviews from late last year. The latest version if powerful, versatile and feels luxurious. It’s the first Jimmyjane vibe that I actually like. Maybe it won’t be the last. My review was on the EF, though, so I’ll probably get around to writing something up on OSAL for you to read.

The Delight by Fun Factory was actually my second. I swapped for one of the originals — the ones that came with a charging case — but never got around to using it. When I moved last year, I misplaced the cable. I wound up trying out the Delight for shape to see if I liked it, and I did like it so much that I purchased the new Click n Charge style. Not only do I love the magenta and black, but it fits my anatomy extremely well.

The Decor Stashe Pillow in Velvish Aubergine won’t get me off but it will hide everything that does and in style.

After using the D.1 stone dildo, I have to say that this blows every metal dildo I’ve ever used out of the water. I am so grateful to have the opportunity to use it and see myself using it frequently in the future.

Another new type of toy was the Stronic Eins Pulsator, which has made its way around many of these lists. It feels good. I just need to wash off all that lint, charge it and use it again (and again and again). This was also my first video review, you guys!

Finally, I cannot tell you how much I love my SHE AfterShave Oil. I could show you the nearly-empty bottle, though. I definitely need to purchase another one.

So, there’s the good.

How about the weird? Strange? Disappointing? Ridiculous?

  • Cat toy or vibrator?

    Cat toy or vibrator?

    The Sonic Revel Body. Cool tech, totally not going to get me off. And those attachments? WTF!

  • This costume from ILoveSexy just didn’t cut it. I mean, I kinda hate the cut.
  • The Revive Energy isn’t terrible but they needed to test the storage pouch, first. Now, mine looks like a sick leopard.
  • Ovo looked like a promising brand, but the kegel balls fucking hurt. The t1 didn’t hurt. It just sucked.
  • I got 2 Gigi 2s. I am giving both away. Meh.
  • I’m not sure that this UFO vibrator works for me.. or anyone.
  • The U Touch Down and U Touch Up just need.. to be better.
  • These “keyless cuffs” are so not practical.
  • This vibrator looks like a cat toy. Pretty sure the cat toy would get me off better.
  • Icicles 39 Handle Broken From Shaft

    Bummer..

    Why the fuck are companies still making these pieces of shit?

  • I’d rather fuck the actual Flash, and he’s my least favorite of the Justice League.
  • But, hey, at least it’s better than vibrating vaginal balls.
  • Minna Ola is the most overrated, over-hyped, overpriced piece of junk I’ve used.. until the Revel Sonic.
  • Remember when that glass dildo broke before I even had a chance to use it?

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5 Lubes I Totally Recommend

July 22nd, 2013

Lube is lube, you know? Most people pick something from the pharmacy and run with it, no matter how awful it was. I used to be one of those people. I know. What I have discovered as a sex toy reviewer and blogger is this: I do not like writing lube reviews. Some of them are terrible. Many of them are just a little bit different from the next one. Most of them do the job without complaint. Few stand out. Even trying to make this list in my head was a little difficult because lubes tend to blend together in my memory. However, a few lubes have stood out from the bunch.

  1. System Jo Premium Women Lubricant
    The only silicone-based lube on this list is by System Jo. I’ve liked several of their products, but this one stands out. Silicone lube feels, to me, like wearing a plastic bag. It’s how a condom feels to men. I hate it. Add in incompatibility with so many of my toys and the general thinness, and it’s out. System Jo Premium is thicker than most silicone lubes, and it’ll last you forever if using for penetrative sex. It can also double as a massage glide.
  2. sliquid lube cubeWet Naturals Beautifully Bare
    The thing about lubes is that they’re not made from my body, and I can feel the difference. I hate it, to be perfect honest. So when I tried this lube from a company that I didn’t think was necessarily spectacular, I was surprised to note that it does feel like more of my own lubrication, at least in the water-based formula. Just don’t confuse the silicone lube and ruin your favorite VixSkin toy, guys.
  3. Maximus
    This is the go-to lube for anal lovers. It’s thick and long lasting. It’s compatible with silicone toys. Unlike most water-based lubes, it isn’t sticky. Once I tried it, I understood why everyone loved it.
  4. Frolic
    While I enjoy thicker lubes, I don’t want them to be solid. They need to come easily out of the bottle. I shouldn’t have to feel like I’m forcing a solid into my vagina. I’ve had that exact experience, so don’t think that I am exaggerating in the least. Frolic has a handy pump bottle that has a cover to lock it. It’s thick enough to stay in place but thin enough to spread, and it’s affordable.
  5. Sliquid Naturals Lube Cube
    Sliquid’s Lube Cube isn’t one lube, but it’s this awesome sampler pack that lets you try various flavors and formulas. The sweet flavors are the best I’ve ever tasted, and most people love Sliquid lube. The company actually makes four different cube options, but I reviews Sliquid Naturals.

What are your favorite lubes for activities like toy play? Vaginal and anal sex? Massage? Let us know in the comments!

 

 

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2012: Best Of

December 30th, 2012

I did a “Best of” last year. It really covered more than a single year, but I wanted to continue the trend into 2012. 2012 hasn’t seen as many reviews as other years. My love life also didn’t pick up until about a week ago, so that’s okay. Unfortunately, some really cool reviews won’t come until after the first of the year, but that’s also okay. If you didn’t notice, the world didn’t end, which means there is a 2013 coming to an Earth near you. I think it will be pretty good.

As for 2012, I’ve seen worse. Some of the items on this list were revamps of toys I’d already liked. In many ways, this felt a little uninspired. A good toy probably isn’t going to get worse. This is how I felt about the Lelo Mona 2. However,  the G4 Big Boss was larger than life in a lot of ways. I actually haven’t used it since I moved, but I know how I’ll fell when I do:

By the time I got anything inserted, I felt like I’d used an entire bottle of lube. It was only like 1/4 but, you know, I was all sorts of slippery. This was a freakin’ masturbation adventure, and who doesn’t like adventures?! The countoured head of this and a little lube and my clit is, like, the best adventure I’ve ever been on.

Trojan Midnight Collection Multi-position

On the other hand, some toys really surprised me. I mean, the Trojan Midnight Collection Multi-position Vibrator? It’s by a company that most people would write off. It doesn’t seem particularly awesome when you look at it, but I liked it enough to say “The first setting is lackluster so I turned it up a few times and found the sweet spot that make me squirt and squirt and squirt. It took me by surprise.” Babeland has dropped the price $20, too, which means I recommend the Midnight Collection vibe that much more.

I also gushed — pun intended — about the 24K Double Pleasure. It’s a gorgeous dildo. It feels nice. It photographs well. I would ask it to marry me if it had cuddly arms.

I reviewed a variety of bath and body products on of Sex and Love. I don’t know if y’all really like them, but I do, so you just have to put up with them, okay? I tried a whole bunch of the Pink Cupcake scented products from Classic Erotica, but it was the body mist that really stood out. In fact, I’ve been trying to get other stores to carry Wanna Be Sexy Flirty Body Mist, but they just won’t listen. Their loss, I guess?

Red Velvet and AbsintheI didn’t do as much erotic reading this year, but I was really impressed with one of the volumes that make it on my shelf: Red Velvet and Absinthe. This book has really set the standard as to what I want to see in my clit lit: sex, creativity, unusual settings, paranormal activity. It made me write werewolf erotica. Can you give it a higher recommendation that that? It wasn’t the only book I liked, though. “Crazy Little Thing” might not get you off, but it sure will open your eyes.

Not everything that I tried was on of Sex and Love, however. I recently posted about the strongest vibe I’ve ever tried that doesn’t plug in — the Form 6 G3.  After losing the cord to my Delight, I also bought a new one, and I fuckin’ love it:

This it the type of toy that I really get into. I find myself moaning without thinking about it. The experience is whole-body and wholly primal. Sometimes I just want to get off quickly, and sometimes I want to forget about the world around me. The Delight provides the latter

milk made nourishing bath & shower bubblesI also finally found a product that helps with shaving issues. Unfortunately, it isn’t the end all and be all of shaving. I still managed to get a follicle infection. Ugh. But it’s nice, and seems to be lasting much better than my previous aftershave products.

Only two pieces of lingerie makes this list, but they’re nice enough that I don’t really care that everything else failed miserably.  Coquette’s Holiday ruffled garter belt  is feminine, comfortable and practical to wear. While Baci’s sizing is weird, the lace boyshort is super cute. I like the way it feels on me, and my shrinking ass means it fits better now than when I first got it. Can’t complain.

And now, the last for least. I fuckin’ love Cake Beauty, and I will forever buy Milk Made body wash and shower products until I die.

Like I said, I already know that 2013 will bring with it some positive reviews. I hope to try more new things. I am hoping new romance means more content for this blog. I’ve missed it. I miss all of you. I want to be better, but I’m not quite as happy with or ready to review any ol’ dildo that comes across my doorstep. That’s a good things in terms of my overall satisfaction and the quality of my time spent, but it means less blog fodder, too.

So, what were your favorite products of 2012? Which of my reviews did you like best? Do you have anything to say about anything else I did on this blog or could do in the future? Let me know in the comments!

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Make love to your long distance lover online

My Favorite Sex Toys, BDSM Gear, Lube, Lingerie, and Erotica

December 15th, 2011

I recently did a count and have realized I’ve written over 450 reviews. 467 to be exact (plus a handful on other sites). Most of those items are vibrators but I’ve become a dildo convert, have test driven probably a dozen lubes, burned a handful of candles, played with some BDSM gear and and put on an ever-growing collection of lingerie. In short? I’m closer to saying “I’ve done it all” than 99% of the population.

But we all know it’s not about numbers and I definitely have come to appreciate quality over quantity. People rarely ask what my favorite toys are. Okay, no one has really ever asked. I don’t know why. You’d think it would be one of the questions I hear all the time but I don’t. Maybe you’re not asking it but you’re thinking it which is exactly why I’m going to tell you anyway.

Clitoral Vibrator

Layaspot, Desire clitoral vibe and Siri 2
Laya Spot and Siri 2 are among my favorite vibrators

Internal Vibrator

Dildo

Lingerie

Massage

Lube

Becoming Cliterate
Phantom now knows more about female pleasure than most humans

BDSM Implement

Erotica

Non-Fiction Book

Miscellaneous

Of course, the list of my favorite things is bound to change, especially as new things take the place of what I used to love.

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