How FeedBurner Outed Me, Twice

September 16th, 2012

A while back, I decided to burn my feed to give readers more ways to subscribe (email being the big one) and let me track those subscriptions more easily for giveaways. FeedBurner was the obvious solution, and I’d already used it with other blogs. I don’t personally subscribe to any feeds via email and few feeds at all. I check on Google Reader or my phone’s RSS app, but I prefer to stay up-to-date with blogs that I read by actually visiting them. I’m old school like so.

So when I burned the feed for of Sex and Love to my normal FeedBurner account, I thought nothing of it. I didn’t realize that you could actually see a link to my Google+ profile and that FeedBurner used my email address as the sender’s. One of my readers notified me. We joked a bit, and then I quickly set out to rectify the situation. Feedburner includes a handy option to permanently transfer ownership, so I did. I thought all was well and good.

I was wrong. I signed in to my normal Gmail, which I rarely use, to see a kind message from someone who enjoyed my reviews and followed them via FeedBurner. I knew something was wrong, but the actual copy of the blog post to which she was replying didn’t show my photo or email address at all. It took some Google-fu to figure out that, despite having switched ownership, to sender email had remained the same for my feed.

I headed back to FeedBurner once more, but couldn’t find the location to change this for the life of me. I was feeling frustrated, because FeedBurner’s navigation and layout is overly complex. There was also no location where I could preview exactly how email updates would look to my readers. I eventually found the solution (Publicize > Email > Communication Prefs) and changed my sender’s email. Now, all my email subscribers will see messages from Adriana @ of Sex and Love, like it should’ve been when I permanently switched ownership. That seems like something Google should do for you.

Regardless, I never expected this to be a problem. Judging from the reactions of my Twitter friends, neither did they. At least one person changed her information after talking with me.  Google has really been the bane of my existence when it comes to (trying to) blog anonymously. I don’t have much to lose, but others do.

The moral of the story is, ultimately, to avoid mixing any accounts or emails between your identities even if you think that there’s no way it could be a problem. Setup PayPal with additional email addresses. Use an address specifically for your sex blog/reviewing identity. Create separate instant messaging accounts. Sign up for Disqus twice. Anonymity, like freedom, requires you to plan for it.

5 Comments

Categories: Articles, internet

Here we are.. again

July 20th, 2009

1 year and 3 days ago I introduced myself to the world as Adriana Ravenlust. I had big plans, big ideas – like I always do. I don’t dream small. I dreamt of being the biggest and the best. I wanted to explore my sexuality, to let you journey with me. I wanted to talk about love more frankly than I have been able to for years. I wanted an identity through anonymity.

And I have achieved some of that. Yet, I cannot help but see how I fallen flat on my face as well. In so many ways I am not where I was. In so many ways, I am still.

I’ve traveled by plane from my home abroad to return to the states where I feel, perhaps even more-so, a stranger. And not even because I spent 2 years living across the world. I went from reviewing items and blogging about it in my spare time to nearly making it a career after saying good bye to my husband as he departed for his second deployment (he returns home in a few “short” weeks). I have spent those months in almost complete isolation, without a single friend to break the silence – except for you, dear reader, commenter, Tweeter, e-mailer. For a while, I felt a connection with a community in a way I had not connected for months, even years. I felt hopeful at the prospects. E-mails and comments and Tweets caused laughter, made it easier to survive the day.

Perhaps most surprising was the way that this blog actually helped to bring my husband and I closer together, maybe even lending a hand to mend a rift,the worrying about which would keep me awake at night.

I could not have expected those changes but even stranger, I could not have predicted what would stay the same.

Despite the fact that I wanted to reinvent myself in some ways, I have only succeeded in being me even more. I have resisted changed, disagreed with policies and argued vehemently over opinions, as I am wont to do. I am sure that I have made more than one enemy.

I have also been unable to prevent or stop feelings from bleeding over into this aspect of my life as well. Most importantly and relative to this blog is my dependence and desire in regards to recognition. While I enjoy reviewing and blogging and Tweeting more than I ever realized I would, I do not enjoy it nearly as much as I could on those days when I get lost in the shuffle. Perhaps it’s simply hard to stand out among the seemingly endless sea of sex toy reviewers. I am no Epiphora, no Sleeping Dreamer.

Maybe I have failed to cement myself as more than a sex toy reviewer as personalities such as Essin’ Em have done; although, I have tried and will likely continue to do so with articles, features and even a bit of erotica. It is entirely possible that no matter how I try, I just do not have what it takes, that I lack the edge to stand out in the crowd. It could be even more likely that in my zeal to be someone else, I forgot to be me and isn’t that, after all, the only absolutely unique thing I have to offer the world?

I probably just expect too much, in this, as I do all else, setting myself up for disappointment. It was folly to set my expectations so high (yet I did, do, will). I find it more appealing commiserate than to congratulate myself on this hallmark. I could be misguided, even in that.

Happy birthday, blog.

14 Comments

Categories: Everything Else, Site

Bijoux Indiscrets cosmetics for better sex

Interview Me!

January 15th, 2009

Sienna had posted this neat little meme on her blog. She was interview by Beautiful Dreamer and I requested an interview as well. So here are her wonderful questions and my responses to them, followed by a more detailed explanation of the process.

You have some really interesting articles on sex. How do you come up with your topics, and are you currently working on another one? Well, my thought process in relation to anything pretty much goes something like this “Can I somehow use this event/subject/thoughts in one of my blogs? If so, how?” I am always looking for blog fodder and blogging is a pretty active activity for me. A few of my articles have been inspired by friends or questions asked of me. Others are simply things I have been thinking about. In the case of the sex toy materials guide, I was curious and used it as a way to become more knowledgeable myself as well as provide a comprehensive guide. I have a few articles which I have started and saved because I just wasn’t feeling them enough at the time to finish. I eventually will go back to them when the timing is right, whenever that will be.


You say you are fuelled by your emotions and ‘knee jerk reactions.’ Has there been a time when this has led to trouble? To something good? When it comes to my relationship, this tends to be consistently negative. I sometimes react before thinking and I am trying to curb that behaviour which can be destructive. I think that I can be more empathetic toward others, however.

Your site is great! When did you start learning about web design? Thanks a lot. I have had websites for nearly 10 years now. I’m still always learning something new.


How do you deal with the different aspects of your life? Your online and your real life identity? When I started this blog, I wanted to be blunt and honest but I didn’t want certain friends or my family knowing so I adopted a pen name. I strive to avoid any permanent and obvious connections between my every day identity and this one, especially because my “main” online identity is pretty established and it’s easy for anyone to find me by name.

The problem with being active in any sort of online community is that it takes time and effort and I am often struggling not to neglect each of those communities. I currently have 3 blogs, including, this one, which I update on a frequent basis (several times per week), 2 Twitter accounts (TwitterFox is a godsend!) and post in dozens of forums of different natures. It’s just a matter of prioritizing, I suppose but sometimes I realize my time isn’t balanced enough and I feel like I have to play “catch up.”

Interestingly enough, I have invited several friends, both online and off, to visit this blog and some are even active readers and commentors. However, there are simply some people who don’t need to see this.
Your reviews are great! What’s something you’re looking forward to reviewing? Why? Thank you! I currently have a few toys waiting to be reviewed which are firsts: an anal plug, frozen lube cubes, and a storage box. I also tried out my first massage candle which was a big hit. Lately I’ve been wanting to branch out from the vibrators which I typically review so I am just excited to review new things.

Make sure to post this below your answers!

Want to be part of it? Follow these instructions:
1. Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.”
2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

6 Comments

Categories: Everything Else

Image © MisterUnlucky; used with permission.