No Sexless Marriage For Me, Thank You

February 5th, 2009

I’m watching Extreme Makeover (a rerun, of course) and one of the participants is a woman who has commented how her sex life has deteriorated because she has no confidence. I just cannot imagine that. Sure, I don’t always like the way I look but as long as I don’t have to stare at myself in a mirror the entire time (or for any time, really), then I am fine.

I simply cannot imagine not being intimate with my husband. Even when I don’t love it all the time, I want to have sex with him. Being sexual gives me more confidence and makes me feel more beautiful. That anyone could let this happen just shocks me.

2 Comments

Categories: Everything Else

Before and After Toy Wipes

February 4th, 2009

Before and After Wipes

This brand of toy cleaner no longer exists. You can use Afterglow Wipes (afterglow wipes) or Lovehoney’s Wipes (check out my review) to clean your toys and intimate areas, however.

Up until recently, I wasn’t using anything special to clean my toys, just soap and water. Actually, I didn’t really like having to run to the bathroom for clean up so I would often toss my used toys back in the box haphazardly and I wasn’t very vigilant about cleaning before use. As I type this, I actually find myself shaking my head. This definitely was not the safest or healthiest practice to be in and although I was improving, I wanted something even easier so that I would have no excuse not to take care of my toys ans Before and After Toy Wipes really fit the bill.

My search for a toy cleaner started at the bottled solutions but it seemed like they were still a hassle because you need some sort of lint-free cloth. So I opted to go with wipes and these are in fact made by the same company as Before and After cleaner which I also know is really popular. For me, I think wipes are much preferable.

My travel size packet contained 10 single-use wipes which are generously sized at 8″ x 6″.  These are much bigger than, say, moist towelettes and when you consider the area which some toys have, this is important. They’re also much thicker and more like fabric. The wipes are also lightly scented and I find the sweetness to be a little out of place. I think I’d rather use an unscented wipe and I did find that certain materials, like silicone, inherited the scent after use. One thing I like is that the packet is resealable. Lift up the flap to remove a wipe and press it back down. I have used almost all of the wipes and the flap still sticks perfectly so the wipes stay moist.

This is not rocket science. If you’re ready to use a toy, wipe it down. Let it dry and have fun (which is exactly what the packet says). Or, if you’re all done, wipe down, let dry and store for next time. These wipes take care of any lube, body fluids, lint, hair or dust which may be attracted to your toys (especially silicone vibrators and dildos). I was concerned about whether or not it was safe to use these without rinsing, especially because these wipes leave an extremely visible filmy residue. So, I have rinse with water sometimes which is okay because it’s still less work than cleaning but it’s hard for me to not rinse something when I can see the residue. With that said, I have used my toys without rinsing and I have experienced no adverse reactions.

The ingredients is small if not full of long words and includes:

Water

  • Cocoamidopropyl PG-Dimonium Chloride Phosphate
  • Benzyl Alcohol
  • Disodium EDTA
  • Fragrance

I assume the alcohol is what is doing the cleaning in this product but that doesn’t mean the toys are sterilized; if you can go one step further and periodically boil or bleach your toys, I would.  After using these wipes, I have noticed no ill effects on any of my sex toys. I’ve used these wipes on plastic, glass, elastomed, and silicone and they have worked well. I would use one wipe to give a quick wipe down before use and after, but these wipes are meant to be single-use.

The wipes especially worked well when it comes to cleaning up after anal play. They made short work of the messy situations that sometimes arise with sex. I know Before and After cleaner is often recommended for the removal of smells, and with some elbow grease, the wipes did a good job of this but did not completely eliminate some smells. I wanted to toss these in the toilet afterward (and I did, actually)  and I’m not sure how safe that was. A wipe that is completely safe to flush (and said so) would be awesome.

I also don’t know if these are safe to use on me, which I didn’t, but many wipes can be used on both skin and toys.

Although I don’t have any real complaints with Before and After Toy Cleaner wipes, and they are definitely better than my previous cleaning routine, there are a few improvements that could be made to really buy my loyalty. If Classic Erotica were to ensure that these wipes could be flushed, eliminate the scent and film and clarify whether they’re safe to be used on the body, this would be an unbeatable product. As is, I would probably invest in these wipes again because they are just so easy and efficient to use.

2 Comments

Categories: Non-Sex Toys, Reviews

lingerie

Respect, and how not to earn it

February 1st, 2009

A while ago (months, I guess) I became a member of TooTimid’s forums. I had found the site a while back when looking for sites which use sex toy reviewers (I applied, twice, and heard nothing back). I took a bit to get around to joining the forums and I found a fairly active community which was sex positive if not as contemporary as some. I enjoyed it, nonetheless.

After joining, I put my blog URL in my signature. I soon received a private message from the person who I assume is the site owner which said I could not have the link in my signature but it would remain in my profile. I was fine with this.

Recently, I went to update sometihng else my profile and realized my URL had been removed; I can only assume this happened back when I first joined and I had not realized it. I updated my information, added my URL back in and soon received another private message. The owner (again, my assumption) thanked me for being an active part of the community but said I could not have the URL in my profile and hoped I understood.

I did not and I very politely responded as such. I did not see why I could not link to my personal blog in my profile and, if he did not want that happening, he should edit the profile fields so it could not be entered. If he was worried about competition, I recommended increasing Too Timid’s reach and reputation as an online sex shop and community rather than being paranoid about personal blogs. I strongly suggested they reconsider what I think of as a ridiculous policy. I heard no response.

In fact, I have been suspended, without notification until “Dec 27 4746, 08:14 AM.” I can only assume that, by this time, I will be dead and Too Timid will be long gone as well. In fact, I doubt any humans will remain but I digress.

Rather than being mature, the powers that be chose to suspend an active and helpful member. I joined despite the fact that they ignored my requests to be a reviewer and gave my input to other members, helping them as I could. All I asked was to fill out a field in my profile which was, for lack of a better term, fill-outable.

This suspension really shows TooTimid’s true colours. This is not a company or site which supports community, in my mind. This is not how you spread the word of your company and make yourself viewed as a team player. This is not how you boost your reputation. No, this is how you alienate those who have the power to spread the word about your site (which TooTimid does seem to need; it’s not very well known despite the fact that it seems to have an active community and resources on its site). This is how you show that you are so insecure about what you’re selling that you must try to censor the mere mention of potential competition.

In fact, rather than ask how I think TooTimid might strengthen its public appearance or to do a link exchange, I was essentially banned without valid reason. It seems to me that not allowing for constructive criticism gets you nowhere fast. I can name quite a few historical figures who saw defeat because of this tactic.

Shortly before this happened, I was contacted by TooTimid on Twitter to be a reviewer (but no follow-up contact was made). I know I was not the only one. I had thought it was a step in the direction of community-mindedness. However, after this, I must caution anyone who might choose to review for or affiliate with Too Timid in any fashion. If this is how they treat an active community member, I am not sure how they would treat anyone else. If they is how they deal with a nonserious issue, I wonder what approach they will take with serious issues customers, reviewers and community members may have.

I cannot say the same for TooTimid, and while I also cannot force anyone to decline an opportunity (nor would I think any less of anyone who does review with them), I can warn that TooTimid has a long way to go before they are a company I can respect.

12 Comments

Categories: Everything Else

Woe is me!

January 28th, 2009

Feel free to pity me when you read my review of the Senso 6 Pak. I know I do.

Comment

Categories: Everything Else

Bijoux Indiscrets cosmetics for better sex

System Jo H2O

January 26th, 2009

System JO H2O
9.99 from Of Sex and Love Store

System Jo H2O is a water-based lubricant that aims to mimic the slickness of silicone-based lubricants while remaining odorless, tasteless, and tack-free. In these pursuits, I think System Jo H20 has performed admirably.

Packaged in a clear bottle with a fairly minimal silver and blue design, System Jo H2O comes off a bit futuristic to me. It’s not entirely discreet, nor does it scream “lube.” A person would likely be able to determine just what this bottle contains by its general shape but it’s not so gaudy that it would be necessarily embarrassing to have out. Complete with the narrow, push-top style cap, as opposed to the flip-top styles of many lubes, I find using this lube less messy. The cap style also helps to control how much lube is dispensed and I feel it’s very secure when closed; flip tops tend to leak if a bottle should tip. However, it’s not as easy to use as a pump.

When it comes down to it, System Jo H2O is a very good water based lube. It’s not as thick as some I’ve used, like ID Glide, so it may not be great for anal sex (System Jo does have an anal lube as well). However, it is very slippery and feels more like silicone lube. Despite being a bit thin, I’ve had positive experiences with it so far. It’s all I’ve used when inserting my rather well-endowed Passion Wave Stimulator, which has a circumference of 5 1/4″. This is definitely bigger than any other toy or penis I play with, so I feel confident that System Jo H2O will meet all my needs.

Although my sessions with the Passion Wave tend to be quick, they are hard and heavy with many quick thrusts. This lube has worked wonderfully. I have not had to reapply any time I have previously used it. Furthermore, the application doesn’t leave my hands sticky and goopy. This is one lube that comes through on its promises that it will not be tacky. For review purposes, I applied lube to my palm and rubbed my hands together quickly until the lube wore away. While it did not absorb completely – my hands felt slick, still – it did not become dry, clumpy or uncomfortable. I would recommend washing away any excess lube or the remains of the lube after play (soap and water will do the trick).

I have not experienced any negative results with System Jo H2O. It has been odorless and tasteless, as advertised. Although there is no ingredient list on the bottle except for Vitamin E (or on the website, it seems), I have had no bad reactions.

System JO H2O has proven to be a slippery lubricant that rises above other water-based lubes. It contains no oils or silicone, making it perfect for play with toys or partners, and it’s completely safe for use with latex condoms. The System Jo line of lubricants includes warming, and anal lube as well. Based on the high performance of System Jo H2O, I would likely consider System Jo over other lubricants if I were shopping, and I will probably stick to System JO H2O when it comes to water-based lubes..

17 Comments

Categories: Lube, Reviews

Make Me Cum Clit Sensitizer

January 26th, 2009

Make Me Cum Clit Sensitizer
$7.46 from Amazon

I was shopping Adam and Eve when I spotted this product and figured it might make things a little more interesting. Who doesn’t desire more orgasms? However, Adam and Eve’s Make Me Cum clit sensitizing gel did not.. make me cum. I cannot say that it did not aid in this pursuit, but if it did, its effects were not obvious enough for me to say that it’s a good investment.

Make me cum is a clear gel that comes in a 1/2-ounce jar, and for what it does, I find the price tag of $9.95 to a bit much. I mean, this jar is just small. I wasn’t expecting anything huge, but I did not realize I was paying so much for so little. It’s about the same size as those small jars of eye cream. You’re not getting much.

With that said, you don’t exactly use a whole lot. I usually dab my finger in the jar once or twice, then rub the gel around my clit. There was a faint medicinal scent that wasn’t necessarily unpleasant, and neither smell nor taste has ever been noticeable to my husband when I applied the gel.

The active ingredient of which is L-Argenine, which is:

an amino acid that has numerous functions in the body. It helps the body get rid of ammonia (a waste product), is used to make compounds in the body such creatine, L-glutamate, and L-proline, and can be converted to glucose and glycogen if needed.

L-arginine is used to make the nitric oxide, a compound in the body that relaxes blood vessels. Preliminary studies have found that L-arginine may help with conditions that improve when blood vessels are relaxed (called vasodilation), such as atherosclerosis, erectile dysfunction, and intermittent claudication.

So I would assume that applying this topically would loosen up muscles in the clitoral area, allowing blood flow to my clit to increase. Thus, my clitoris would be more erect and more sensitive. The science makes sense, but just because my clitoris is more engorged does not necessarily make anything more pleasurable or guarantee more orgasms.

Note that l’arginine may trigger herpes outbreaks so you may want to pass over this product if you or your partner have oral or genital herpes.

I have used this before masturbation and sex. I like the idea of applying the gel because I’m anticipating sex. It makes me feel a little naughty like I have a little secret that no one else knows. I become more aware of my sexuality, but I think it’s more placebo effect than the result of this clit sensitizer.

Once I apply this gel, I either feel nothing at all or a general sort of heat happening around my clit. Now, I suppose this means that the gel is working and blood is rushing to my clit, but the heat is more unpleasant than pleasant. I don’t feel particularly aroused or more sensitive, but some stimuli do seem to be a bit more intense.

But perhaps the big test of success here should be whether or not I do experience an increase in the “frequency of orgasm” as the jar states. I have to say that I have experienced mixed results, and it is a bit difficult to pin the success of failure or orgasm on this gel alone or on surrounding circumstances.

About half the times I used this gel, I did feel like I had a better orgasm. The times that come to mind were also more pleasurable sexually intimate experiences in general, so that may have increased my pleasure more than this jar. Even with better orgasms, they were not easier, and I would assume that a product that induces more orgasms should also make them easier to achieve. Otherwise, where exactly does “more frequent” come into play?

The rest of the time, there was no discernible effect when it came to the quality or frequency of orgasm. Period. These were usually the times when I also felt no stimulation from the gel after application.

The bottom line is that this is an overpriced product, and its main strength is the placebo effect. If you want, you can let yourself think this product is awakening your clit. If this gel did anything at all, it made my clit feel warmer and may have increased the enjoyability of my orgasms. However, I cannot say it did so for a fact. Furthermore, I have no conclusive evidence that Make Me Cum clit sensitizer increased the frequency of my orgasm. As for the advertised purpose of this product, I would call it a failure, and I cannot recommend it to anyone else.

If you’re interested in similar products, check out my review for one by Intimate Earth.

29 Comments

Categories: Lube, Reviews

Devine Toy Box in Wine with Lace Overlay

January 25th, 2009

Devine Toy Box

This is an archived review of a discontinued product.

When I first saw this toy storage container from Devine Toys, I fell in love. It was exactly my style and the red with black lace was gorgeous. It looked classy with perhaps a touch of gothic style, well made and the ability to lock away my most personal items from prying eyes was definitely a plus.

When it arrived, the shipping box was smaller than I expected, but there was not a lot of wasted space or packaging. The Devine Toy box comes with some promotional material as well as a sample of Afterglow wipes which are made by the same company. One of the flyers is folded in three parts, and with some organizational creativity, you see a different message depending on whether or not the flaps are open or closed. The inside of the flyer includes information about Devine products, and the back introduces Devine’s “new” Afterglow wipes. Another promotional piece focuses on the Afterglow wipes themselves.

Lockable Sex Toy CaseThe Devine Toy box, as described in the flyer, is 10″ by 5″ by 5″ and made of faux leather. There are six style options total, 2 of which are made with lace, including mine. (The other colour listed is purple but I have seen blue so I wonder if it has been discontinued).

The lace parts seem to be sort of pillowy and I suspect have another layer of fabric and foam beneath the fabric which is visible. Black lace is laid over red fabric on the top, back and front panel which folds over and through which a small metal loop is placed to lock this box. When the box is opened, the top does not fall all the way back. Rather, it’s held open with a ribbon sewn into the inside of the box which is lined with a red satin material.

The rest of the box (top, bottom, front and sides) and is made of a very nice faux leather. On the bottom of the right side, toward the back, the Devine logo is stamped/etched into the material but this is not overly noticeable nor does it take away from the appearance of the box.

Put it all together and you have a fine looking storage solution for your sex toys. In fact, I was really blown away by the aesthetic appeal of this piece. It was the main reason I wanted it and I certainly wasn’t let down when I gazed at it, face to face. My husband was even impressed and it was immediately obvious that this box would not be shoved under the bed nor tucked in the closet. Its size and appearance make it perfect to sit atop a bedside table, and the lock provides extra security if that’s an issue.

The padlock and 2 keys Devine provides with this toy box are a polished silvery metal which matches the hardware o the box itself. The flyer depicts the Devine logo on the lock, but this is not true. This set isn’t exactly an impenetrable force. I was able to pick the lock with 2 paperclips and the keys are rather generic. The bad news about this is that it means it doesn’t take a lot of effort to break into your toy box. If security is an issue. I would buy a stronger lock (although not all sizes may fit) The good news is, if you lose the keys, it doesn’t take a lot of effort to break into your toy box.

Lockable Sex Toy Case And losing these keys is probably easier than I’d like it to be. Although there are holes in the keys so that they can be slid onto your keyring, they’re rather small. I found it more difficult than usual to slide the tiny key onto my keyring and think a necklace or ball chain might be a better option especially because a smaller key becomes a little hard to use on a ring full of keys.

Lock and keys aside, because I honestly may never use them besides for show, I really enjoy this box. It works perfectly on my nightstand. Now, this isn’t the box you used to store every toy you use, nor is it the box you cram as full as you can. No, this is the box you use to display and keep the best of your collection close at hand for those moments, both expected and unexpected. It will have a permanent home next to my bed.

In order to easily access all my toys, I do not want to overload the Devine storage box. I have only one layer of items in it, save for a packet of toy wipes, which move easily out of the way. I can comfortably fit these items inside the box:

Lockable Sex Toy Case I think this is a fair assortment of toys to always have at hand. If the box were just a tad larger, I could fit my Miracle Massager in it but I am only a bit disappointed. The Devine toy box will also not fit taller bottles of lube and bigger vibrators and dildos comfortably, but this is okay for me. The one reservation I do have is I’m not sure how sturdy the ribbon that holds the top of the box is, and even its existence is a bit sketchy. I am constantly pulling the box open too far because I forgot about the ribbon, and I think I could break the ribbon or possibly damage the inside lining. I personally wouldn’t mind if the top of the box went further back, so I don’t think the ribbon is necessary.

However, that concern was misguided because while the ribbon has remained intact, the lock mechanism has come apart, and I cannot fix it because I lost some of the tiny pieces. This means I cannot fully close the box, although it still works well on my nightstand. I just wish that it was in pristine condition. Nevertheless, I’ll keep it because it’s no longer available.

 

27 Comments

Categories: Reviews, Storage

Image © MisterUnlucky; used with permission.