Alumination

April 2nd, 2010

This is an archive review of a discontinued toy.

Metal is all the rage in sex toys these days, so I wasn’t entirely surprised to see that Doc Johnson has its own vibrating aluminum line, appropriately named Illumination. These petite vibrators are extremely straightforward: a cylindrical shaft topped off with a rounded end.

This vibrator is long and slim – 6″ x .72″ diameter; it seems to essentially be an elongated mini bullet. Although I have not used them, Jimmyjane’s Little Chroma/Steel/Gold vibrators seem quite similar, so this might be a more cost-effective option if you’re wondering whether or not a toy of this style is good for you. The overall feel is weighty and compact,

Because it is so thin, there is potential to use it as a replacement for bullets in certain toys (cock rings), but it could be awkward because of the length. It is good for precise and direct stimulation and would work well externally. It could be angled to hit certain spots internally, but the lack of texture and girth limits its functionality. I did not especially enjoy the sensation inside; it definitely felt a little lacking. Because I like broader external stimulation, I also did not love my Alumination externally, either.

The size and design make it perfect for newbies, though! It’s not intimidating, and the smooth metal is easy to insert with only a touch of lube (if that). I would strongly warn against anal use because there is no flanged base on this one, and it would slip out of a person’s fingers with ease when coated with lube.

However, it’s ridiculously easy to use. There is a single push button on the end of the battery cap. You know the type. Press once to turn it on, press again to cycle through the settings, and then once more to turn it off. This does mean there is no “quick off” function, of course. There are three strengths of continuous vibration, so this vibrator might not be exciting enough for some people. The vibration is higher pitched, and all levels feel similar to me personally, but if you like pinpoint vibrations, these are focused in the last inch or so of the shaft.

In terms of noise, Alumination is not the loudest vibrator I’ve tried nor the quietest. You could safely use it in one room of the house with others home (door closed) but not in the same room.

Because it is metal, you can experiment with temperature play. Let the Alumination rest in a bowl of cool water or ice cubes to chill it. Replace the cold water with warm water, and you will have a different experience altogether. Some might be disappointed that it is not pure metal because the battery cap is plastic, but I didn’t especially notice. The cap screwed on and off easily enough for me to insert 2 AAA batteries and seems fairly secure (to keep them in place, at least). Doc Johnson even claims the Alumination vibrators are waterproof and there is an O-ring where the cap screws on but it does not meet seamlessly with the shaft. There is an additional seam at the end of the shaft where a separate piece of metal caps off the curved end. This piece is glued into place and seems secure but can easily collect gunk.

Aside from that, the sleek surface makes this toy incredibly easy to clean with a wipe and physical dirt will wash right off with water. It won’t collect lint which is one of the things I detest about silicone, so it can be dried with any old towel. It isn’t made of any material that will react, so it can be tossed in a box with other non-reactive materials. Plus, the small size makes it incredibly easy to store (between the mattresses or deep in your pillowcase?) without being found and the same could be said for travel.

I didn’t keep the box because it is quite a bit bigger than the vibe itself but I enjoyed the floral motifs in metallic paint. The box has a friendly, feminine feel to it. While I have not loved every Doc Johnson toy I’ve tried, the box art is usually visually appealing.

The Alumination vibrator seems to be a solid piece that offers some versatility. It’s extremely affordable as well, so it might be a good toy for a newbie. It didn’t knock my socks off but it was a nice experience, regardless.

3 Comments


Apply Within

March 31st, 2010

I have jokingly been creating a check list in my mind for future partners. I guess it’s just a way for me to let off steam regarding my husband’s behaviour, flaws and bad habits. It’s a little resentful but maybe a little smart, too.

Characteristics You Best Not Have

  • Mommy Issues
  • Daddy Issues
  • Aggressive Driving
  • Emotional Score Keeping
  • Inability to recognize or express emotions
  • Knee Jerk Reactions to Every Little Thing
  • Inability to distinguish sex from love
  • Inability to combine sex and love when appropriate

Characteristics You Must Have

  • Sense of Humour
  • Like for Dr Horrible
  • Cat Love
  • Ability to Remain Faithful
  • Understanding of Commitment
  • Fondness for hand holding, cuddling and other physical touch
  • Healthy Interest in Sex
  • Have already been in love
  • Willingness to read books, go to therapy and do other things should the need arise
  • Maturity
  • Tendency toward Geekiness
  • Love for dorky comedies

Hey, guess what? I’m tired and randomly capitalizing things. 😉

PS, I know I could more healthily and happily word all these things as positive “must haves.”

PPS, I’m not really a crazy bitch with a checklist.

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Make love to your long distance lover online

Isis

March 30th, 2010

Isis

Isis

This is an archived review of a discontinued product.

Isis is one of the few non-glass products by Luxotiq but, like all their products, is made with the same gentle curves which make it both incredibly attractive and functional. This silicone dildo is soft but vibrant pink and sports not one but two functional ends to meet all needs. Although I am not a connoisseur of dildos by any means, I do find Isis to work splendidly; in fact, I think this piece of certainly worthy of a goddess’ name.

Isis is made of silicone which is firmer than it is soft but still has some flexibility. It’s not as firm as Tantus toys but remains more firm than most Fun Factory silicone. The particular composition of silicone feels noticeably dense to me. The shape could be described as a loose and long “S” but it is not symmetrical. One side has a gentle curve while the shaft gradually increases in size and the other side is generally smaller with a flatter head angling off from the shaft. The entire piece has a velvety texture and while there is a seam which runs around the toy and can be felt by a finger, it is not felt internally.

I first experimented with the thicker end, inserting it with a little water-based lube. The shaft grows to about 1 1/2″ in girth so it’s neither tiny nor gigantic. It falls right into my comfortable range and a lot of people consider that about “medium” sized. However, the size increases toward the end so you can’t work your way up to it; it’s the other way around. I found the curve and size to be absolutely perfect for stroking my G-spot which, as you might recall, it fairly shallow. I sometimes have difficulty with angled G-spot toys and much prefer the curve of the Isis. It’s also interesting because I usually have more success with G-spot vibes, not dildos so I was a bit surprised how easy it was to “milk” my G-spot. I achieved ejaculation within a minute or two and the girth helped stimulate exactly the right spot.

Used in this way, the angular end is great for a handle and there is plenty of length to grasp (unlike the Dai-Do #5 which I just tried). I didn’t have to insert it very far at all but Isis’ design seems ideal no matter how deep your G-spot it. I didn’t opt for any fancy maneuvering simply because the girth was comfortably snug for me but I am sure you could.

If the curved end is too thick or doesn’t offer the stimulation you prefer, Isis can be inserted the “opposite” way, too. The angled head is smaller (1″ diameter) and offers a bit more precise movement. It doesn’t personally fit me the best, but that is part of the appeal of having a double-sided dildo.

Those are not the only perks, of course. This dildo can easily be cleaned with soap and water, as the included “business” card instructs. There is even a soft cloth for drying to because silicone has the tendency to pick up lint. It’s only a few inches long and wide, though so it’s not as practical as it could be. I just use a regular towel or you could let Isis air dry, too. These are nice touches, though.

I also appreciate that the dildo came in a sealed plastic bag which I actually had to cut (okay, I probably ripped it) open. Very few toys come this way, and I admit, even when they are settled in a pretty-looking box (and Isis does come in a nice white and pink box that ties shut with ribbon; it sits on pink satin over a foam-ish core), I don’t know how clean the box/fabric is for the dildo to be returned to it for storage (or vice versa). It just gives it a cleanly feeling but it might just be me. If you are a neat freak, Isis could be boiled or submerged in a deep solution to sanitize but most folks probably do not need to do this.

Although it’s versatile, I don’t think Isis would really work perfectly between two bodies at once and I would not advise anal use (unless you’re super advanced) because the lack of a flared base. It is certainly long enough that a partner could use it on you, of course. (=

My review seems short but, the truth is, dildos don’t do much. Their either work or they don’t and, for the most part, I am not a dildo girl. Still, I can say that Isis is a quality dildo that does work for me and will probably work for many.

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Liberator Fascinator Throw

March 28th, 2010

I recently got a gift from someone awesome and by “someone awesome,” I mean myself. That gift was a Liberator Shag Throe because I was sick of wet spots on the bed (from sex) and washing all my towels (from squirting). I was apprehensive about my purchase the shag throe was only available in purple, while the microfiber is available in more colour choices. People seemed to like both just fine, but I had such a difficult time deciding whether colour or texture mattered more, especially because I am not a big fan of microfiber (but I wasn’t sure if the microfiber throe felt run of the mill).

Note that Liberator currently only offers Throws in one material: “microvelvet.” I believe this is less plush than the blanket I own. Nevertheless, my general thoughts apply to the overall product.

The Shag Throe comes packaged in a plastic box and is neatly folded. I noticed immediately that the shag is softer and plushier than microfiber, so I think I made the right choice. I got what some retailers call “regular” size, and the blanket is really quite large at 72″ x 54″. It just covers the top of a queen-sized bed, which is why Liberator bills it as queen sized. I personally never use it extended to its full size. It is always folded in half or thirds because I simply do not need that much area. I could probably get away with the smaller Travel Throw, which measures 53″ xs 36.”. But if you want a blanket that covers your entire bed, they also make a king-sized option.

The size alone is not the only factor that makes the Throe seem quite large, perhaps even bulky. It is obvious that there are several layers to this blanket; of course, that only makes sense because the Throe has to contain something special to keep moisture from our furniture and linens. According to Liberator, that is an “inner moisture barrier.” In layman’s terms, it seems like a sheet of plastic and sounds like it, too. When moving, folding, or otherwise breathing on the Throe, there is a noticeable sound of fabric-covered plastic. It’s not necessarily detrimental to the experience, especially if you’re louder than the Throe (nor will it give you away to the roommates or neighbours) but it is a little.. unsexy.

So, those outer layers? Shag and satin. The shag is a short fur which is fairly soft to the touch but not like cashmere or anything. It’s definitely more appealing than “shag carpet” which is what had always come to my mind before. I mean, who wants to have sex on that? Besides cheesy 70s porn stars, that is! For whatever reason, the shag side feels better to my hands than my body, which feels a little suffocated by it, but it doesn’t feel bad at all.

And the satin? Well, it’s satiny, but the outer layer is much thinner than that of the shag so it’s easier to feel the moisture barrier inside. Because of this, I don’t really like the satin side as much. If it were just satin or satin over something softer, it would feel better, but it just feels too plastic-y for my tastes. I never use it silk-side-up. However, it’s smoother and cooler feeling, which some folks might prefer in hot temperatures. There are two other downsides to the satin side: it can slip around on surfaces and it runs (like pantyhose). I found out the latter after leaving the satin side up on my bed for a short time, and, when I returned, it was obvious my cat(s) had walked over it. 

The exterior is finished with a secure border/trim around the edges, which holds everything tightly in place. 

In use, the Throe performs as expected. I have read accounts where the Throe was not enough to contain fluids of some people, but I am no super soaker, so I am satisfied. In fact, a product like this can really help someone who is worried about the mess of ejaculating or the difference between urine and FE. I wouldn’t even care if it were only urine, except that I don’t want that on my sheets or bed, so the Throe is a lifesaver. The shag side not only soaks up my fluids but even makes them a bit difficult to see. However, if you’re looking to use the Throe as a towel for cleaning up after the fact, it doesn’t perform so well in that manner, partly because it’s stiff and partly because it doesn’t absorb moisture as much as it holds it. As a result, larger amounts of fluid will pool on the Throe instead of being soaked up by it (but they will not soak through to whatever is beneath it).

Nevertheless, I have found my Shag Throe helps me be a procrastinator (whether or not that’s helpful, you can decide). After playtime is over, I can roll up my toys in the Throe and toss it in the corner overnight or until I am ready to deal with clean up. I find it so handy in that way because I didn’t think of this as a versatile product, really.

The Fascinator Throw is machine washable on delicate/cold. You might even be able to get away with a regular cycle, but I didn’t try. It kept its shape well, and I tossed it in the dryer on low heat. Some folks have let it air dry on the line or shower rod, which is also an option. I found that I had to run it through the dryer multiple times before it was actually dry, which is a bit perplexing. I have no idea how long it would take to air dry, but now that I am back home with paid laundry machines, I guess I will find out. The Throe is in great condition after being washed and dried, and the colour is still vibrant.

But I have to say, I don’t feel the need to wash it every time I use it, thankfully. It doesn’t pick up smells nor does it seem necessarily dirty after a use or two. Like I mentioned, it’s really big so I can just fold over a previously used spot and there’s still plenty of clean surface left.

However, my original blanket seemed to have a defect as the trim started to come undone. I contacted Liberator, which replaced it. I now have two of them, with the original demoted to a cat blanket. The trim hasn’t broken down anymore, even with washing. Because I’ve had it in the window, it has become noticeably sun-faded. My replacement has held up well with no stitching issues, though!

I definitely look forward to spending more time with my Shag Throe!

While I recommend the Fascinator Throw to anyone who wants to make cleanup easier and experience that security during playtime, I understand that not everyone can justify the cost. This is especially true because the price has nearly doubled since I got my first Throw (and I believe it is more valuable than the current microfiber option). To that end, I’ve created a list of alternatives to the Liberator Throw that can save you money.

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Make love to your long distance lover online

The Way I See It

March 26th, 2010

There have been so many posts in this corner of the internet lately which bitch about, well, just about everything. I think we all understand that sex is personal and people have a lot of gut reactions to things whether it be rape culture or cheating or corporate politics. And, far be it for me to say that people shouldn’t feel how they do or even that they should or should not post something on their own blogs but.. I bet that if we all spent a little more time focusing on what is right in our little corner of the web (and lives, in general), we might just feel a little bit better.

If there’s one thing I am learning, it is that our experiences are coloured by our attitudes. Certainly, there are many legitimately negative things in the world today and they do carry over into cyberspace but the opposite is also true. So before you stop reading because you think I am going to bitch about how everyone else is bitching, I’m not. That won’t get any of us anywhere. Instead, I’m choosing to see things through a different filter and you might be surprised how things appear.

For instance, I’ve happened to notice how freaking awesome it is to get free shit just ’cause I talk about it. So I’m pretty grateful to a bunch of companies who allow me to do that. I’m completely blown away by the response I get from actual manufacturers who care what I say about their products or companies who are interested what I have to say about their business or website. This reviewing and consumer interaction concept is something sort of foreign in many markets and I can respect that. Plus, I do get a lot of feedback from other consumers like myself. My reviews actually help people shop.

And, for whatever reason, people read this blog. They care about what I have to say and some of them even care about me as a person and what happens in my life. That? Is the bee’s knees. Dated cliches aside, I am truly appreciative of the friends I have made via this little blog o’ mine. This blog has even helped me earn money. In fact, I could pay for all my domains and hosting by affiliate commissions alone so I can actually say this site pays for itself.

But wait, there’s more!

My activity around these blogs and communities has also been an enlightening one. There is much to learn, so many different perspectives I’d never considered or even knew about to consider. There are so many opportunities to see thing from another’s point of view and to help spread the word. There is so much productive, helpful and eye opening discussion going on everywhere you look. Few other areas on the internet foster healthy communication that way.

It’s pretty cool to talk about sex all the time, too.

All things considered, there seems to be a lot of bright side to look at.

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For Your Nymphomation Adult Toybox

March 23rd, 2010

For Your Nymphomation Adult Toybox

For Your Nymphomation Adult Toybox

FYN no longer makes toy boxes, but I highly recommended Lovehoney’s deluxe toy cases, which come in multiple sizes. 

I was really excited when I found out I was going to get to review the FYN Adult Toybox from TabuToys. I have tried a variety of toy storage options but nothing which is super portable or as functional as the For Your Nymphomation products are purported to be. In addition to that, nothing I have would fit under my bed because of the low side rails, except for this box.

Obviously, a box which someone might pick because it is especially shallow is not a box which will hold every toy in your collection (unless, of course, it is a fledgling collection). Still, I was a bit surprised at just how small the Adult Toybox is, as I removed it from the shipping box. The measurements are 12″ by 9″ by 2.25″. I guess “12 inches” sounds kind of big but, once you get down to it, it’s not. It looks a bit like a mini, rounded briefcase and even has the handle to boot! But because the sides are thin, the interior is not much smaller than the exterior, thankfully. The rounded corners do reduce the storage space a bit but, then again, it makes it a bit more robust and you won’t be squashing the corners. It’s also small enough to be easily portable; although; I wouldn’t mind it being wider but this is definitely the smaller version of the toy boxes (the other is 12″ x 18″ and still quite portable).

One of the unique features of the toybox is how the hardware on the zippers slide together with a small hole through which a lock can be slipped. FYN includes a tiny padlock and 2 keys (which come attached on a chain) and it is much like the Devine padlock: more of a novelty than anything (definitely easy to pick). While the idea is good, only a lock of a similar size will fit. I am sure some exist but I have never seen a legitimate lock of that size. Also, the zippers glow in the dark to make it easy to find (if you make sure to position it so the locks are visible).

The exterior is a purple faux leather. It is is visually “textured” to look like leather with a slight shine that won’t really fool anyone. The exterior is what is considered hard case and I would wipe it down with a damp cloth if it needed cleaning. It’s also easy to manipulate and could easily be slid under a bed. I have a small bag which would fit under my bed but wouldn’t get under there so efficiently. On the front of the case is a handle, a strip of purple nylon (like a backpack strap) which is covered with a similar faux leather in the center (where you would grasp it). Overall, the craftsmanship seems secure.

In terms of colour, I personally do not love the purple. It’s kind of dull and dark and not pretty. I also find the trim and nylon parts do not really match the faux leather. FYN does make the case in other faux leather colours and even other materials, however. Purple is also not super discreet.

Upon opening the case, there is a thin, elastic strap sewn onto the inside of the lid. The elastic is sewn in permanently with 4 separate spaces for toys, bottles or other items; however, because these spaces are not adjustable, they will not work well for everyone. If the handle is facing you, the elastic spaces get progressively smaller toward the right measuring just under 5″, 3″, 2″ and 2″. The two on the very right are quite narrow and would fit a very thin toy, like the Alumination or, I imagine, some of Jimmyjanes narrow toys. I can fit a couple of smaller bottles of lube in the third space and two larger ones in the last but remember that items you might place in these spaces are 3D and you have to compare the width of the spaces to the circumference of the toys.

On the lid I have:

In the main compartment, there is a soft pocket with a stretchy edge, like in much luggage. It is the entire length of the case and about half the width. I find this works well for chargers or packets of wipes. The more you put in there, the less you can put atop of it inside the compartment, however. The compartment will definitely hold a couple full sized rabbits and a variety of smaller toys.

Currently, the large compartment holds

It’s quite the collection. However, I was a bit eager to pack everything in there when I got it and the way I had it arranged looked good.. until I closed the box. Silly me forgot that stuff that takes up room on the lid will take up room in the box when closed so I had to rearrange. Additionally, I find that the lining, which is the same smooth nylon-type as some suitcases or umbrellas is quite slippery. Unless the items in the elastic band are a really tight fit, they tend to slide down into the box when closing it. It would be nice if the lid was lined with something else that is a bit grabbier (or if the straps were somehow adjustable). Fleece might work? However, FYN claims that this material is water resistant and can easily be cleaned with soap+water damp cloth which is a plus and I do like that the nylon isn’t going to lint all over my toys either.

When everything is secured and zipped up, there will be movement when picking up the Adult Toy box but it is minimal. Of course, if you have yours less packed, things will move more. It feels secure when carrying it, not like the bottom is going to fall out or anything and the handle is well sewed, too. Plus, since I can lock it, I know the zippers won’t come undone, either. You mean your zippers don’t have a mind of their own?

Obviously, this is a handy dandy toy storage solution but there is still room for improvement. Less slippery lining and adjustable straps on the lid (and perhaps an extra strap to hold things in place) would be awesome. It’s not critical but it would be great if TabuToys also carried the black version which would offer more discretion, even in public places. Plus, the purple is just a little disappointing.

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Make love to your long distance lover online

Dai-Do #5

March 22nd, 2010

Dai-Do #5

Dai-Do #5

This is an archived review of a discontinued product.

I fell in love with this entire line of metal dildos when B3 released them. They all looked sleek and refined but, unfortunately, were not received with as much enthusiasm from everyone else. The reviews were generally lukewarm so I held off from adding any pieces to my collection. Still, my curiosity was piqued, and I decided to give Dai-Do #5 a try. I haven’t had a lot of success with bulby toys but I really like the idea of the design and I wasn’t sure I would like the other designs.

The Dai-Do line is made of aluminum and stainless steel and the first thing I noticed was how incredibly heavy the Dai-Do #5 felt. It is “only” 14oz but it feels heavier than that and perhaps heavier than any of the other metal toys I have. The condensed shape means the bulk of the weight fall into a short length and is especially focused on the largest ball (the handle end) of the dildo instead of being more evenly spread throughout the toy. The weight is distributed more evenly with both the Pure Wand and Alumina Revolve. Some people like weightier toys, but this definitely could pose a problem if you have bone or joint issues.

My Dai-Do #5 came in a deep red and the ball shapes reflect the world around it like looking at a stack of glass Christmas tree bulbs. It’s a fantastic-looking piece, and I am not sure any photos can actually depict how it will appear to the naked eye. The pieces also come in black, but I thought they might look flat, so I opted for red.

At the very end of the handle, the B3 logo is painted and can be felt with a finger. I have not been able to scratch it off but that might be possible to do over time. Around the center of the largest ball is a black silicone “grip” onto which is attached a metal plaque with the B3 logo. The band itself is soft and slightly flexible but, obviously, there isn’t much give because it is surrounding metal. There is a thin, silver band on either side of the silicone for an overall sleek look and the “slip resistant” band-aids in grasping the toy. However, there are some nooks and crannies within the area which could harbor unseen bacteria but this area is probably not going to super exposed to fluids because…

The ball is huge. The diameter is around 2″ which makes it pretty much useless, maybe not completely because I am sure it could be inserted with proper warm up and lube but it is not designed for that. In comparison, the insertable portion of the shaft is both tiny (the largest bulb is 1.6″ in diameter) and short (3.5″) because the ball detracts from the overall length. While the larger end is supposed to aid in wielding the dildo in the palm of your hand, I found the opposite to be true. It is bulky enough that it can hinder more detailed movements; although rotating the shaft or moving it in a circular motion works well. The lack of length can also hinder thrusting. However, this dildo would be pretty anal-safe, but since I do not own a P-spot, I cannot discuss its effectiveness in that manner.

With the handle pressed right up to the entrance of the vagina, it’s a bit difficult to feel the largest bulb. The smaller balls feel, too small. The sensation is a bit harsh to me and disappointing. The shaft definitely feels smaller than it looks, and those looking for girth may be disappointed. When I was able to adjust the angle to achieve some thrusting, it was difficult to stimulate the exact spots I wanted and my G-spot is shallow and easy to reach. Dai-Do #5 is just not the perfect, universal G-spot dildo.

However, the slick metal makes insertion a breeze with little prep or lubrication. I would stick to water-based just in case some gets on the silicone grip. The gradually increasing balls aid in insertion as well. I also enjoy how cool this metal dildo feels during initial insertion (it remains quite cool during storage) but temperature could easily be altered with warm water or potentially warming/cooling products.

The dildo is also easy to clean. I frequently used Afterglow wipes and the surface wipes clean easily. Soap and water washing will also do the trick, but I have heard some personal accounts about the metal reacting strangely to boiling, so I would not advise going that route. Use a bleach solution to wipe, instead, if sterilization is your end.

B3 has included a satin bag with their Dai-Do line of toys. I find the ribbons that cinch it are designed a little oddly, and there is definitely more length than is necessary. It’s still functional but a little.. odd.

I think I would have enjoyed the Dai-Do #5 more if so much of it wasn’t dedicated to being a handle so that the insertable portion of the shaft was both longer and girthier. A smaller “handle” would have made it easier for me to wield. However, someone else might love the feel as well as the polished look, the ability to incorporate temperature play and the ease of cleaning and insertion.

uiktgyh

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