Lately, my G-spot has been a lot more sensitive. It feels as though it had suddenly decided it was time to wake up. Where, before, I would only be able to stimulate it fleetingly and I would hesitate to even call that stimulation pleasurable, I have been able to stimulate it much more successfully as of late. I have yet to achieve the ever elusive G-spot orgasm but I have been able to achieve ejaculation on more than one occasion. Because it is not paired with orgasm, it usually takes me by surprise. It also seems like, the more I do it, the more I ejaculate. Of course, it was almost shocking at first and I was a bit paranoid that it was just pee because, let’s face it, I don’t find the idea of urinating on my thighs and down my butt crack to be all that appealing. This is something I’m really looking forward to sharing with my husband when he gets home and I’m sure he is more that looking forward to it as well.
Tantus Silicone Delta Vibrator
July 29th, 2009
Tantus Delta
Tantus no longer makes this stimulator.
I’m going to take a reprieve from my normal review style with this one. I hope you enjoy.
The Description: The Delta by Tantus is a dual stimulator which can be used by either sex for anal and perineum stimulation or by women for vaginal and clitoral or vaginal and perineum stimulation. It’s flared based makes it perfect for harness use while the grooves on the base make wielding this dildo a cinch. A hole in the bottom can be used with Tantus’ suction cup or the included bullet.
The Specs: Delta is a gorgeous, shiny purple and is quite soft and flexible – unlike the other Tantus toy I tried.. It’s also rather small; the larger, insertable finger is only 3″ long and about the thickness of my thumb while the smaller thumb-like protrusion is 3/4″ long. The base is roughly a rounded triangle and measures about 3″ at the longest point and 2″ at the shortest. The included bullet runs on several watch batteries and has only a single speed.
The Good: Like all Tantus sex toys, Delta is pure, nonporous, sterilizable silicone which makes it healthy and body safe (this means only water-based lube). The small and tapered finger will make insertion possible, even easy, for the freshest of beginners. The grooves on the base work wonderfully for grasping and maneuvering the Delta.
The Bad: The flexible silicone does not provide the firm G-spot pressure many women desire nor does it give a filling feeling. The clitoral stimulator is extremely short and just missed mine. I find it difficult to believe this could be used for double penetration. I also suspect the size and softness mgiht make this a little difficult to control in a harness. The included bullet is rather weak and will be difficult to remove even if you lube it up before insertion.
The Suggestions: I don’t think Tantus’ usual dildo + a bullet formula works well for this style of toy, even if the silicone were larger and more firm in places. Perhaps this would be better as simply a dildo like the Little Su or a Jollies Dildo but I think that would involve redesigning the entire toy.
The Bottom Line I knew the small size and soft silicone of this toy would not be enough to get me off almost immediately after inserting it. I get the feeling it work would better as a first time anal toy because it’s not intimidating in the least. Even if I were a beginner, it wouldn’t suit my needs, however.
Delta seems like it would be much better as an anal toy than a vaginal one, however.
2 Comments
Icegasm Kit
July 24th, 2009
Icegasm Kit
N/A
from
This is an archived review of a discontinued product.
Temperature play is an easy and safe way to add a little excitement to the bedroom. I love the feel of a cool dildo upon first penetration and also enjoyed some frozen lube cubes I had the opportunity to try. Oddly enough, I’m almost adverse to heating products, except for use in massage, and have no interest in them whatsoever. On the other hand, I jumped at the opportunity to try an ice-based sex toy (and I hear BSwish has something on the horizon, too!).
Straight from the package, Icegasm is perhaps too like Tupperware with its brightly coloured ice tray and pocket rocket style vibrator. Part of me want to cringe as the various coloured caps over the tray and part of me finds it ingenious because it would absolutely not look out of place in the freezer. I could even say it’s a tray for water bottle ice cubes. On the other hand, nothing about this set is sophisticated or appeals to my sense of aesthetic.
Regardless, Icegasm is unique. It comes packaged in a clear plastic bag with instructions you or I could have printed and tied with ribbon. It has a very DIY feel and I’m not sure how I feel about that. The presentation was slightly impaired by the fact that the vibrator had fallen out and was floating loosely in the box.
The ice tray has 4 tubular slots to produce tubular ice cubes which can be attached (1 at a time) to a pocket rocket style vibrator. This vibrator is pretty typical, if not a little outlandishly coloured, save for the tip which is a plastic dome (as opposed to the 3 “prong” style of many pocket rockets). Beneath the dome is a nut, the center of which lines up with a hole in the center of the dome. Any appropriately threaded object can be screwed into the top of this vibrator. Otherwise, it is one speed, powered by a single AA battery and relatively mild in terms of vibration. I also don’t think it’s waterproof.
If it the caps which prove appropriate. These slightly dome-like pieces of plastic sit atop the molds (they don’t seem to snap on so expect them to be loose). Through a hole in the center of the caps are plastic “sticks”, like a screw without a head. These sticks protrude from either side. After freezing for 3 – 5 hours, with the caps placed on the molds, the ice has frozen securely around the plastic. (Your ice cubes are ready to use after running under hot water or letting thaw for 5 – 10 minutes.) The other end of the stick is screwed into the vibrator by grasping the cap. The overall tool looks something like a wand or sword.
When it comes to transmitting vibrations, ice does not seem to be the best material because it is so dense. I could feel it but pressing it against myself definitely muted the sensation. Nevertheless, the cold was intense. Almost too intense, even for me. I think a lot of people fear cold and, if you’re really not into it, this is definitely not for you, but they forget that our bodies are more sensitive when we’re cold. When you have goosebumps, sensations are that much more intense, right? Unfortunately, I found the Icegasm too cold for insertion but external play was more comfortable. The chill definitely made me more sensitive, and I remained so for quite some time.
On a note of safety, I know you’re not supposed to apply ice directly to skin or for more than 15 minutes in regards to pain so I would also not use this for a prolonged amount of time. However, there is no safety note on the instructions.
One thing I noticed is that I had so much fun playing with it in my hands, before on my genitals, that it was already quite melty. The drips of the cold water were more shocking than the actual cold solidity. With the ice end on top, the cat actually serves to “catch” the drips and can be dumped out. Of course, the melting makes is a wet activity so a towel or Liberator Throw or something would be appropriate.
Next time, I would also alternate with something room temperature or warm just to break up the intensity. So perhaps a glass dildo dipped in warm water or even warm breath (if only I had that right now!) would make it even more interesting and possibly make it more comfortable for longer play.
Ultimately, I didn’t experience any sort of Icegasm. I had fun with a novel idea. I would like to play with it again and add some heat. I think the properties of vibration were overstated; a pocket rocket really doesn’t give you great vibes but it didn’t detract from the overall play. Perhaps the concept of “ice dildos” would be something to explore more. Either way, I’m really excited to see what ice toys pop up next and while the Icegasm kit isn’t flashy or as pretty as some I think it’s mainly due to the concept of ice toys being in its infancy.
17 Comments
Rabbit Vibrators: Love ‘Em or Leave ‘Em?
July 21st, 2009
I have owned/reviewed many a rabbit vibe in my time. I will continue to add to my collection, despite the fact that I don’t think any one rabbit I own completely satisfies me in every way. Still, I recommend them and I truly believe there is one out there for everyone; it’s just that, finding the one can be difficult but I’m not sure it’s more effort than the rabbit is worth. (Perhaps more money than it’s worth, though). I think I’ve been lucky. My general shape and size must be more accommodating for rabbits. Indeed, many of them feel like they’re too long but I can take advantage of vaginal ballooning in order to wedge them as high as possible to ensure best clitoral stimulation.
On the other hand, maybe other women can’t or don’t wish to be a wedger, like myself. I recently read a review where Epiphora mentioned denouncing rabbit vibes as a whole. The blasphemy! Though, I do feel for her because I can only imagine how difficult the search for the perfect rabbit might be for others. It’s certainly disappointing that many have given up.
How do you feel about rabbits?
9 Comments
Here we are.. again
July 20th, 2009
1 year and 3 days ago I introduced myself to the world as Adriana Ravenlust. I had big plans, big ideas – like I always do. I don’t dream small. I dreamt of being the biggest and the best. I wanted to explore my sexuality, to let you journey with me. I wanted to talk about love more frankly than I have been able to for years. I wanted an identity through anonymity.
And I have achieved some of that. Yet, I cannot help but see how I fallen flat on my face as well. In so many ways I am not where I was. In so many ways, I am still.
I’ve traveled by plane from my home abroad to return to the states where I feel, perhaps even more-so, a stranger. And not even because I spent 2 years living across the world. I went from reviewing items and blogging about it in my spare time to nearly making it a career after saying good bye to my husband as he departed for his second deployment (he returns home in a few “short” weeks). I have spent those months in almost complete isolation, without a single friend to break the silence – except for you, dear reader, commenter, Tweeter, e-mailer. For a while, I felt a connection with a community in a way I had not connected for months, even years. I felt hopeful at the prospects. E-mails and comments and Tweets caused laughter, made it easier to survive the day.
Perhaps most surprising was the way that this blog actually helped to bring my husband and I closer together, maybe even lending a hand to mend a rift,the worrying about which would keep me awake at night.
I could not have expected those changes but even stranger, I could not have predicted what would stay the same.
Despite the fact that I wanted to reinvent myself in some ways, I have only succeeded in being me even more. I have resisted changed, disagreed with policies and argued vehemently over opinions, as I am wont to do. I am sure that I have made more than one enemy.
I have also been unable to prevent or stop feelings from bleeding over into this aspect of my life as well. Most importantly and relative to this blog is my dependence and desire in regards to recognition. While I enjoy reviewing and blogging and Tweeting more than I ever realized I would, I do not enjoy it nearly as much as I could on those days when I get lost in the shuffle. Perhaps it’s simply hard to stand out among the seemingly endless sea of sex toy reviewers. I am no Epiphora, no Sleeping Dreamer.
Maybe I have failed to cement myself as more than a sex toy reviewer as personalities such as Essin’ Em have done; although, I have tried and will likely continue to do so with articles, features and even a bit of erotica. It is entirely possible that no matter how I try, I just do not have what it takes, that I lack the edge to stand out in the crowd. It could be even more likely that in my zeal to be someone else, I forgot to be me and isn’t that, after all, the only absolutely unique thing I have to offer the world?
I probably just expect too much, in this, as I do all else, setting myself up for disappointment. It was folly to set my expectations so high (yet I did, do, will). I find it more appealing commiserate than to congratulate myself on this hallmark. I could be misguided, even in that.
Happy birthday, blog.
14 Comments
Good Vibrations Guide to the G-spot
July 18th, 2009
Good Vibrations Guide to the G-spot
$9.50
from Amazon
“Good things come in small packages”.
“There can be too much of a good thing”.
“It’s the little things that count”.
At first glance at The Good Vibrations Guide to the G-spot (here on out just known at The Guide, okay?), it’s hard not to wonder if the Good Vibes team, including author Cathy Winks (a former Good Vibes employee, reviewer, and guide author), religiously stuck to one of the above cliches. Otherwise, why would this book be so damned short? Indeed, measuring in at 63 pages, a full 10 of which include references, resources and notes, it almost feels erroneous to call this a book. Perhaps “extended pamphlet” would be more accurate? In truth, I believe that Good Vibes/Ms Winks tried to be open and honest about a subject which has not been thoroughly studied or even acknowledged by the scientific community and, by extension, most knowledge is anecdotal, regarding personal experience, rather than tried and true scientific fact. Even then, what exists is little and, by sticking to the few facts there are, Good Vibes was only able to produce a slim book. In some ways, I applaud this approach because The Guide is essentially hype-free and that is definitely one of its strong points. On the other hand, it quickly becomes evident that there just isn’t enough evidence to warrant the writing of this book or the purchase unless you really prefer a hard copy to keep in the nightstand or are otherwise completely unfamiliar with the G-spot.
So a brief rundown of this brief publication. The introduction sets the attitude for the entire book and that attitude is extremely reassuring and comforting. Cathy Winks tells the reader that, yes, some women experience pleasure from G-spot stimulation in these ways and the G-spot can sometimes be located and stimulated in these ways, every woman is different. Some women need different techniques, have different shapes or quite simply are not positively affected by G-spot stimulation. And it’s all okay. The intro also introduces us to the quotes from real women that are printed throughout the book, describing their personal experiences.
Just the Facts, Ma’am is the chapter which follows and basically gives the reader an anatomy lesson. Cathy talks us through the clitoris, anus, vagina, perineum, urethra and, of course, the urethral sponge AKA the G-spot. In fact, most references to the G-spot seem to use the term urethral sponge. I find this to be slightly misleading because The Guide does not take the time to differentiate between the different erogenous zones located around the urethra/sponge – IE the G and U-spots. Some confusing wording in The Guide seems to imply that the erogenous zone near the urethral opening, also known as the U-spot, is simply the “external” end of the G-spot. I find this to be erroneous but perhaps it is simply another poorly researched topic. Similarly, there is no mention of the Anterior Fornix Erogenous Zone/A-spot. Regardless, the author explains that all the hype about G-spot orgasms has done a disservice to clitoral orgasms and orgasms in general as women right them off as the “wrong” kind of orgasms. By the end of the chapter you feel that, whatever works for it, it’s all okay.
I’d like to take the time to note that this chapter includes a diagram which I found especially unhelpful. Perhaps it is the size limits or the black and white or simply the image is not true to proportion for simplicity’s sake but it is not my favourite. In particular, the pubic bone seems incredibly far from the vagina.
The next chapter is perplexing in that it is its own chapter at all. Ms Winks explains to the reader that there really is no new information about female sexuality or the female body. Nothing is being discovered, only rediscovered when society finally decides it is acceptable. Body part by body part, she outlines the discovery and exploration of body parts from Kinsey’s findings on the clitoris to Grafenerg’s studies on the urethra and naming of the G-spot to historical recollections of the female prostate and how views about female ejaculation have changed over the years. Because this chapter was generally split up by body part, I’m not sure why it couldn’t be merged with the first. Additionally, much of the information felt like repetition, already. Save for the interesting fact that, for over 2 thousand years, scientists believed conception was due to both male and female ejaculations, there wasn’t much information worth reading and certainly nothing really new to me.
Exploration focuses on finding your grove (if one is to be found) with the G-spot. It starts with an emphasis on communicating with your partner, describes general location and feel of the G-spot and, like many other resources, advises plenty of play to increase arousal beforehand. The typical “come hither” technique is discussed as well as suggestions of position for solo and partner exploration, including intercourse. However, most of the chapter seems to cover ejaculation: how to (don’t forget those kegels!), who can do it, what ejaculate is made of so on and so forth. I found it interesting that no studies have been done to determine if female ejaculate could carry STIs. Again, this chapter reflects the great amount of uncertainty in the world of female orgasm and ejaculation.
Tips, Toys and Techniques delves into the PC muscle and spends a page or three stressing – yet again – that all orgasms are good and whether or not you have one type, another or a blend of all types it’s all okay. The chapter is summed up with description and even names of toys which might help stimulate the area. Cindy tells us that some women like vibration on the G-spot and others not, because it is responsive to pressure and not touch – a useful (but not new) tip, indeed.
And then the book is done – save for notes, references, resources and a note about the author.
Say what? Yes, that’s it. Besides a few interesting historical points, a tip that cervical caps may block access to the G-spot and the bit about ejaculate and STIs, there was virtually no information in here that I did not already know (and even those tidbits were something I could likely learn about via the internet). If you’ve Googled the G-spot more than once or followed any discussions about G-spot orgasm, you probably already have all of this information. So, if you’re like me and have the information but haven’t had a lot of luck with G-spot exploration anyway, this is not your solution. However, if you’re an absolute newbie to the G-spot, require your information in hard copy or are informed but still incredibly unhappy about your progress with G-spot orgasms, this book might be useful to you. Even still, it’s easier and cheaper to Google it.
10 Comments
Best Lesbian Erotica 2009
July 15th, 2009
Best Lesbian Erotica 2009
$15.95
from Amazon
As my collection of erotic and “mature education” books grows, I’ve grown, too. I’ve become more aware of my preferences and, hopefully, this will help me determine what items are best for me to buy or review. Unfortunately, despite the fact that I know I like lesbian erotica, I was still disappointed in Best Lesbian Erotica 2009: because it’s not all encompassing lesbian erotica, it is narrowly focused butch/femme erotica.
Let me back up, though. This colourfully bound book called for me ever since I first laid eyes on it. It’s feminine and modern in purple and green (a la Joker, perhaps?) shades which don’t quite match the hair and fingernails of the scantily clad ladies on the cover but that’s okay because it’s still pretty. Really, the colour combination is one which I have always loved so it easily won me over.
It’s also the last edition Tristan Taormino will edit and begins with her foreword which both gives us a glimpse of what is to come in the book and what has come in her life because of her involvement with the series. It’s erotic in its own way, touching and appropriate. Following, is an introduction by Joan Larkin, the one who selected the stories (and as such, the object of my scorn). Following Tristan’s words, the introduction really pales in comparison.
The majority of this book is, of course, 2 dozen tales of girl on girl (and sometimes another girl) action brought to you by names lesser known and names instantly recognizable (such as Rachel Kramer Bussel). They are, undoubtedly, well written and edited; however, they do not necessarily provide “in your face” action. The settings and interactions are both profound and arousing: sometimes profound because they are arousing and sometimes the other way around. I particularly enjoyed, Shanna Germain’s “On Snow-White Wings”, a beach-side tale of how love can surprise a soul to the point of obscuring recognition.
However, the majority of these stories do little to veer from the theme of butch and femme interactions. Although some stories only implied as much, others were laden with stereotypes and pretenses to the point that I would read less than the first page of a story and skip past it thinking “Not another one”. You see, I don’t mind these stories. Many of them were extremely hot. I more than thoroughly enjoyed “Lipstick on Her Collar” by Sachhi Green and expect to enjoy it repeatedly in the future but it was the unique setting of the story: a butch woman serving in the Woman’s Army Corps during Vietnam, who enjoys a roll in the hay with a femme reporter, amidst the war around them (and perhaps, slightly because of it). No, I do not deny that these stories can be great.
I also cannot deny that several stories, in fact, fight those stereotypes. Teresa Noelle Roberts’ “Tough Enough to Wear a Dress” tell a story of a dyke man enough to shed the stereotypes and step out in a burgundy, velvet evening gown. As her femme counterpart explains, people will think she is
a dyke in a costume.. A fabulous, flattering costume–but one that enhances who you are instead of hiding it
What I argue is that they are not the entirety of the lesbian world, as this edition would have us believe. As I am not familiar with previous versions, I cannot say if it is simply this one which reflects upon lesbians so narrowly or if the whole series is at fault but there is a distinct lack of “vanilla lesbian” (I fretted long and hard about the most PC way to illustrate this concept, please forgive if it offends).
Newsflash!
Not all lesbians subscribe to those lifestyles. The lesbian population is not evenly divided in to butch or femme. Some are a little of both. Some are none. Both parties in a lesbian couple can wear lipstick. Silicone does not have to be an extension of ones self, it can simply be a sex toy. And those lesbians aren’t hiding, either. Neither are they any less significant part of the population. So why is it that this book seems to overlook them so?
It’s a shame because some of the specifics within these stories (S&M, shoe fetishes, stranger sex and escorts – just to name a few) are spectacular but I found it impossible to ignore the overwhelming presences of rigid butch/femme stereotypes. Maybe what I want would be considered boring; maybe I’m not “hardcore” enough to appreciate Best Lesbian Erotica 2009. Maybe I want a man’s lesbianism and need to look elsewhere. Maybe, just maybe, I’m right
