Intimacy

May 1st, 2012

What I miss most about being in a relationship is not the sex but the physical intimacy. I miss cuddling and holding hands. I miss soft kisses on my shoulders, neck, and back. I miss being so close and comfortable with someone that when he walks up and puts an arm around your shoulder, a hand at the small of your back, or rests his chin on your shoulder, you don’t even flinch or blink. I am so incredibly envious of couples who are able to do this, of people who take this for granted. I hope that I never forget how easily that can be taken away and, if given the chance. I know I’ll be more grateful for it in the future.

It’s so hard, and I know this is part of the reason I have such a hard time getting over the Hot Nerd. If I wrote him off, I was also writing off cuddles, the physical touch that I so badly need. Even if we lay together in each other’s arms for hours, I’m not even to the point where my need is even beginning to be sated. I crave touch so badly, but not any touch, a caring touch. Intimate touches. I physically feel the absence of touch, and if it doesn’t physically hurt, it stings emotionally.

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Kissable Chemise

April 14th, 2012

Kissable Chemise

Kissable Chemise

This is an archived review of a discontinued product.

In a recent review, I talked about how I am in between Coquette’s OS and queen size. It’s frustrating. The leopard babydoll was too big, but this chemise just runs too small on me. Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem to be available in plus size, so I was really hoping to make this one work. I should have known better as it’s form fitting, but I really like the design.

The Kissable chemise actually doesn’t look quite as bad as I’d expect, and that’s due to the material around the midsection and behind. It’s a slightly sheer nylon material that’s thicker than it looks in the pictures. On me, it’s not nearly as sheer. The material has some stretch, but it’s also thick enough to hug my curves like a dress and is slimming. Even though my curves still show in a somewhat less-than-flattering way, I was far less self conscious than I expected.

Then there’s the boobs.The lace that covers the boobs is cut flat along the waistline and it looks SO much bigger on the model than it actually is. At the tallest, the cups measure just 6″. I need far more material to cover my C-cups. The result is that they’re squished to my chest, making me look much smaller than I actually am. This is a shame, because it’s really the top portion of this that attracted me. There’s three vertical stripes of ribbon that add a bit of visual flair over the floral lace. This is arranged to cover the model’s nipples, but in real life, it’s less practical than that. I feel like my boobs would have looked better if they were perfectly round implants.

Let me give you an example of sizing. Flat, this measures 13″ at the bust and 18″ at the bottom hem, which is the widest part. To say it fits a 40″ hip is a stretch, literally. From the waistband to the hem, it’s 18″ long, give or take half an inch. This is pretty common, but it definitely seems to sit higher on me than on the model. It’s a barely-covering-my-ass kinda deal. This might not be the case with less curvy women, of course, but the material is probably stretched pretty far on the model. Although this piece stretches a bit past that, but not as much to truly make this one size. A 26″ bust is actually smaller than Coquette’s XS. If I had to resize this, I’d call it a S/M. It’ll work on very proportionate larges, but it’s definitely cut far smaller than the OS label suggests.

So the quality on this is better than I expected, considering how much I had to struggle to get in and out of it. I wouldn’t bother hand washing it if you have a lingerie bag. However, it seems like the entire kissable line used thin ribbons instead of elastic shoulder bands, and I hate this! The adjusters on the straps slip because there’s no friction on the straps, and the straps don’t offer the stretchiness that I like.

This piece comes in a box, FYI. Hate that. So wasteful.

This is one piece that I’ll probably keep around a while, in hopes that I drop some weight and can pull it off. I might even consider wearing it as a slip, beneath a dress. I would absolutely buy it in queen size, though. For now, I hope someone who is considering buying this will be steered in the right direction because of my frustrations.

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Make love to your long distance lover online

Why Dona’s Marketing Misses the Mark

April 10th, 2012

Since I do a lot of shopping online, I like to know as much as I can to determine that I actually want to buy what I’m looking at. I want to know about size and fit and strength, and I do not want to have to send something back because shipping is inconvenient and frequently expensive. However, System Jo seems to want to make it harder than ever to shop. “How?” you ask. I’ll tell you. They come out with an entire line of products that uses descriptions that any normal consumer would think refer to their scents but, no, these are the aphrodisiacs with which each product is infused:

  • acai
  • blue lotus
  • camu camu
  • goji berry
  • mangosteen
  • pomegranate

Never mind the fact that aphrodisiacs are a bunch of BS or that the company’s official statement is to refuse to describe the scents because they want consumers to experience it for themselves. Boy, have we been doing that. None of the Dona products I’ve tried smell anything like the aphrodisiac and most of them have smelled downright awful. I would have saved a lot of time and frustration if I had known that the pomegranate products smell nothing at all like pomegranate.

I find it difficult to believe that I am the only one who feels this way, either. It’s like System Jo is actually making it harder for consumers to find a product that suits them. However, if they had at least tried to describe scents, we’d have a much better idea about which product might suit our tastes or smells as it were. Now, I’d pretty much have to assume all consumers should stay away from all of Dona’s products because they can’t be sure if their powerful smells will be agreeable or cause them headaches. Plus, $10 is a lot more than your $2.50 bottle of body wash from the local drug store, which you actually can smell before you buy.

The good news is, I have a bunch of Dona products that I don’t really like, and I wouldn’t have to deal with if it weren’t for this brilliant marketing move.

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Ambiance Luxury Massage Candle

April 5th, 2012

Ambiance Luxury Massage Candle

Ambiance Luxury Massage Candle
N/A from

This is an archived review of a discontinued item.

The smell of the pear vanilla Ambiance candle from Good Vibes is amazing. Right out of the jar, which has its own metal lid, you smell fresh vanilla and crisp pear. It’s natural and fruity and I love it. Even after burning, the pear smells just so amazing. It makes my mouth water. Unfortunately, the vanilla becomes a little syrupy and artificial. It reminds me a bit too much of that failed Lelo massage candle I tried not too long ago. Still, the pear works well and I’ve actually spent more time using this as a regular candle because of that.

The 11-ounce jars are definitely larger than those of some similar candles. The price of $24 is more than I’d like to pay without a coupon. For a regular scented candle, I could find one that’s cheaper. Still, it’s one of the most affordable options that Good Vibes carries, and it’s so much more affordable than Jimmyjane’s massage candles, which have always been hit-or-miss, in my experience.

The design is pretty simple. Each sent has a different label, and the product name and scent is printed in a very crispy, minimalist design on the front. The label doesn’t want to peel off of mine, without struggling, but it’s discreet. There’s also a snug lid, which can help to preserve the scent and prevent dust and dirt from settling in your wax.

I’m less than halfway done with my candle, and I’ve let it burn for several hours on a few different occasions, so it’s served me well. The product page advertises a 40-hour burn time. That’s probably on the high end, but this is supposed to last 30 to 35 hours. It’s burned fairly evenly, which is always nice. I do have to trim the wick, which I often forget. Otherwise, the wax becomes cloudy and dirty. It seems like this wax burns at a slightly higher point than some massage candles, which isn’t a great thing. I’m always a little apprehensive to stick my hand in. It’s not scalding, but I bet some people will find it too hot.

This candle performs better than most of the candles I’ve tried recently. Still, it’s not as good as an oil. The melted wax puddles well, and the first few rubs work very well. Unfortunately, as the wax cools to skin temperature, it becomes thicker and stickier. This takes only a few seconds, and the wax causes enough friction to ruin my massage mood. Then, the Ambiance candle just feels greasy and heavy.

While I applaud the effort to provide consumers with an affordable alternative to massage candles already on the market, I feel like this isn’t truly a luxury candle. I just want to return to my beloved oils.

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Get up to 30% off at MysteryVibe

Kissable Leopard Babydoll and G-String

March 30th, 2012

Kissable Leopard Babydoll and G-String

Kissable Leopard Babydoll and G-String
from

This item is not longer available.

I am a at a weird in-between point with Coquette’s lingerie, it seems. OS stuff either just fits, but awkwardly, or doesn’t fit at all. And the plus size? Pretty much swamps me. This sucks because I really like the Kissable Leopard Babydoll and G-String, but it’s just a bit too large in the plus size.

Although this runs large with my 38″ bra band/ribs, it’s not a big deal toward the bottom. It’s just more flowy, and I don’t mind. My problem is with the cups, which seem to be too large and sit too low on my body. I’ve actually discovered that if I pull the straps together on my back, racerback style, it fits much better. I think I will end up getting one of those bra strap clips or cutting the straps to create a halter out of this instead.

That way I will be able to wear to sleep. As long as you remember that this piece is sheer and don’t answer the door in it, it’ll work well as a sleepwear piece. The lace detail on the bottom hem and around the cups seems to be sewn pretty well, as does the ribbon and bow around the waist. The ribbon is only sewn to the sides, not around the back, though. I always find that look to be a little odd. With this being a little too large on me, the cups fall to the side as I sleep and my boobs pop right out. Hello there, girls!

The straps extend to a maximum of 21″, with a minimum of 11″. The waist is about 17.5″ flat. It stretches to 25″ flat. From the top of the ribbon at the waist to the bottom of the hem, this piece is about 16″. With the 7″ cups, I really needed to adjust the straps to their shortest, so this hit me at the top of my thigh. Part of the reason I opted for the plus size was that it appeared longer. However, on my short frame, I have to wear it shorter to fit me up top. =/

And the G-string? Well it’s mostly elastic, with one long triangle of leopard-printed mesh and lace detail on top. Even though I can stretch the elastic way up over my hips, the fabric in front is much lower, barely covering my mons. It also has the weird Y-style in back, which I hate. I prefer my G-strings to be sewn as a T. No one expects a fantastic G-string in these sets, though.

Here are the pros, folks:

  • It’s super comfy in silky mesh
  • It’s cute and leopard-y, meow
  • It’s easy to wear
  • It’s flattering on a variety of shapes
  • It’s priced pretty well. PinkCherry is selling it for less than $30.
  • It will fit the larger ladies well
  • It seems to be sewn well enough

But there are some cons, too:

  • The adjustable straps are un-stretchy ribbon, so the adjusters seem to move on me
  • I’ve noticed the ribbons have started fraying, too.
  • And one of my straps is sewn so that the ribbons are twisted and can’t be fixed
  • There’s not a lot of breast support
  • The thong is going to fit even fewer folks, I’d imagine
  • Although it has no breast support, I feel like the cups are designed to fit D-breasts on up

If you’re sure about your size when it comes to Coquette, go ahead and order this piece. I love the way it feels on my skin and will definitely be trying to fix it up so that it fits me better.

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Sliquid Lube Cube

March 27th, 2012

Sliquid Lube Cube

Sliquid Lube Cube
$15 from Sliquid

It’s about time I got down to writing this review. I’ve had the lube cube for long enough. Sadly, I haven’t had great opportunities to try all of it but I really like the idea. You see, this sampler set includes pairs of several of Sliquid’s lube, including Sliquid H20, Sliquid Sassy (for anal), green apple, blue raspberry, cherry vanilla flavored lubes, and Sliquid silver (silicone). Each comes in a square foil package that features a different color. H2O is blue, for example, apple is green so on and so forth. The packets fit perfectly into this little cardboard box. Generally, I dislike packages inside packages, but this just works so well. Plus, it makes sense.

The box itself is also cute. Mine has a purple-to-blue gradient that I love. There’s also a white flower on the front. It’s super classy, y’know, for lube. The box itself is only a little over 1″ thick, so it would fit in my purse perfectly. I actually like this as a portable lube sample. I mean, if I forgot it at someone’s house, I’d be less upset than if I forgot a whole bottle of lube. Not that I’m getting any of have any need for portable lube. Whatever. It could happen.

I’ve tried the water-based lube mostly. It’s a bit thin for toy play, in my opinion. It also seems to get a bit sticky. I’ve heard good things about Sliquid so I was a bit disappointed. Sassy is a thicker water-based formula that’s compatible with all toy types. I’m pretty sure it’s geared for anal sex, but I like gel lubes for masturbation with toys. As you would expect, the silicone-based lube is slicker and thin. It’s good for PIV sex but not great with silicone toys. Especially not VixSkin ones. Le sigh.

The flavored lubes are pretty tasty, especially the cherry vanilla. The mix of two very common flavors produces something more exciting. I would definitely buy a bottle of this. The blue raspberry tastes a little powdery to me. It’s not my favorite, even though I usually enjoy that as a flavor. The green apple is sweet and a little artificial but good nonetheless. All of the flavored lubes are clear and water-based. They contain not sugar, so I’d think you could use it for penetration, if you performed oral beforehand and there was some lube leftover.

I’ve purchased flavored lubes in the past and not only was it syrupy tasting, but it was incredibly sticky. This does make for a stickier hand job; however, it’s not as sticky as I expected and slicker than I expected. You’ll want to wash your hands of course, but it wasn’t unbearable like my past experience. Oddly enough, the flavored lube seemed to develop something of a film when I used it to stroke. This looked.. weird, but it didn’t impede the function of the lube.

As is the case, packets are always too much or too little. The inclusion of pairs means you get a much better experience with these products, which I like. I actually don’t use a lot of lube so the packets are more than enough for my tastes. Even after sampling every flavor, I still have a bunch left to use. As your box winds down, you can easily grab a few packets and toss them in your bag. I’d maybe keep them in a baggie, because there’s a pre-cut notch that makes for easy opening and could potentially lead to tearing.

I don’t usually give a flying eff about lube, but the Sliquid lube cube manages to be impressive.

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Crazy Girl Diva Dust

March 18th, 2012

Crazy Girl Diva Dust

[cft key=product_name

You can no longer buy this product.

The last of the bath and body items I received from Classic Erotica was the Crazy Girl Diva Dust. Like the other items I reviewed, these all focus on sensuality that is conducive to sexuality. Admittedly, body dust isn’t something I would necessarily pick out for myself. I’ve never really bronzed and I don’t always want to be full of glitter. However, it’s something I can see myself occasionally using, now that I’ve had the chance to try it out.The Crazy Girl Diva Dust is not only a shimmery dust but it’s flavored as well. Anything that gets me a lick is a-okay in my book.

Like the other Crazy Girl products, this one is paraben-free, sugar-free, sulfate-free and not tested on animals. If you are on some sort of anti-sugar diet, then licking this off your lover won’t hurt you. According to the manufacturer’s description, this little tub of powder has a lot of powers:

Base of cornstarch, talc and mica for softness plus an even tone to skin upon application. Vitamin C antioxidant helps in collagen production, revitalizes improves skin tone and texture. Aloe Vera Leaf Extract skin soothing, moisturizing agent. Sexy sparkle and shine to accentuate your best assets. Light body shimmer powder designed to give skin a sensual sparkle and glow.

There are some known dangers to inhaling talcum powder, and I do believe that proponents can point out other potential dangers. However, for my infrequent use, this isn’t something that bothers me. I can’t say that this product improves my skin tone or make it softer. It’s already soft enough when I apply it, right out of the shower. What I can say that it does it adds a hint of flavor and a lot of sparkle.

Crazy Girl Diva Dust

The tub has a screw-off cap and, inside sits a powder puff over the powdered-sugar style container. The small holes allow you to shake the container to apply the product to the puff itself. You can shake off excess product back into the container. There was a sticker seal over the holes when I first received the body dust, so it’s not messy when you first buy it. On the puff, the dust has a hint of color. They call it gold but it’s a shimmery tan. Really, I can only see the glitter on my skin, so I think that this would work on any skin tone, really. The shimmer is super noticeable, however. It’s probably best for wearing at night.

The light sweet taste is accompanied by a similar scent. It’s pleasant but a bit generic. There’s no syrup-y aftertaste/aftersmell, though. The smell isn’t really strong enough to notice over other scented products. I wouldn’t mind tasting it on someone, and the glitter is a good indicator to “lick here.”

I did apply some of this to my sensitive inner thighs after shaving to see if it might help with irritation that I sometimes experience. I don’t know if it helped, but it didn’t hurt.

I’m feeling pretty favorable about this product. It’s light, it’s sweet, it shimmers. It is something I would save for specific occasions, however. I can’t see myself running out any time soon. On the plus side, it’s far cheaper than the honey dusts by Shunga or Kama Sutra, so it’s a nice alternative for someone who wants just a bit of flavored product at a lower price.

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Image © MisterUnlucky; used with permission.