Body and Soul Connection Vibrator

August 18th, 2012

Body & Soul Connection

Body & Soul Connection
$25 from Amazon

This vibe either looks like the eyeball guy from Aah! Real Monsters or a laser robot from the video game Portal. The latter is exactly why I requested to review it, even though another model in the line up looks slightly more turret-like. Unfortunately, all the reasons that would have caused me to pass up this sex toy are exactly the reasons I should have.

It took me less than thirty seconds to realize this, honestly. The vibrations, powered by 2AAA batteries are super buzzy. Although it’s easy enough to switch through them with the single button, there’s not much difference between any of the settings, except for the horrible whine that I could hear over music that I was listening to at the moment. This was common in Lelo’s old toys, but it bugs me whether a toy costs less than $50 or more than $100.

The vibrations are so buzzy that I wouldn’t be surprised if someone told me this was powered by watch batteries. In fact, my body simply stopped being able to feel the vibrations after a few seconds. I kid you not. While the rabbit-ear-like attachments are flexible and rounded in a way that surrounds the clitoris nicely, but the depth of the vibrations is simply too high-pitched to to anything. Honestly, I think I might have liked this a bit more, if the vibrations had been deeper. I’m not surprised that they weren’t. Some folks would suggest that this is “Great for newbies”, but I just can’t see how this vibe is all that good for anyone. Does a person exist who is really, honestly that sensitive?!

Still, while I don’t normally like fluttering rabbit ears, the arms on this guy are a little less flexible. They don’t flop back and forth, and they’re wider, so they really hug my clit in a way that could be effective. I usually like pressure, though, and this design really doesn’t offer that. However, I do like that the single push-button works well when you turn the toy around. There’s technically two ways you can hold this flat against your body/around your clit, and this lets you find the best position for the button.

Connection's annoying battery packThis toy is kind of like the less awesome version of the Form 2, which I already didn’t like and have recently swapped away. The plastic base is round, and this toy is bigger so it’s easier for me to hold. However, you have to twist the bottom directly off from the top to insert the (useless) batteries. The whole thing is awkward, and it uses that quarter-twist style that I always have trouble lining up. Plus, the batteries sit in there vertically, without much support. They fall out pretty easily. Obnoxious, dudes.

At least Jimmyjane got the quality down. The Connection has soft silicone up top and shiny plastic on the bottom, and it’s not seamless in the least. In fact, there’s a visible line between the two portions of the toy, and it looks like a gout line full of gunk. Upon closer inspection, it’s not filled with gunk–thank God!–it’s just that the cut of the plastic is super sloppy. This toy feels low-quality now matter how you cut it.

Given the vibrations and the poor quality, I’m surprised by the MSRP. Luckily, sellers on Amazon offer this for less than half. I don’t know if I’d even spend $25 on this, but that’s a smaller hit to your wallet, if you’re convinced this will work for you.

Am I surprised though? Eh, not really. I almost always need something that uses AAs. The shape here does have some redeeming qualities, but it can’t overshadow all the things that bother me about the Body & Soul Connection.

CEN Sexpert

7 Comments

Categories: Reviews, Vibrators

Silicone Jack Rabbit

November 27th, 2011

Silicone Jack Rabbit

Silicone Jack Rabbit
$63.87 from Store.OfSexAndLove.com

Cal Exotics has released their classic jack rabbit in a new silicone formula and, in general, I approve. The line up includes blue, pink, purple and white models. The silicone itself is smooth with a bit of drag so you’ll probably want to use a bit of your favorite water-based lube with this one.

This vibrator only offers 5″ insertable and has a diameter of 1.5″ at the widest point, which is where the beads are, slightly more than halfway down the shaft. The shaft has a rounded, contoured head and there are several protruding bulges on the back of the shaft, just under the head, making a Y shape.

The beads are arranged on several vertical poles and all of them move, either clockwise or counter-clockwise. The clitoral attachment is, traditionally, a rabbit with soft, squishy ears. His nose extends toward the body as well.

The controls on this one could be a little more intuitive. There’s a squiggly line which turns on the vibrations. Pressing it again cycles through three modes of steady vibration as well as pulsation. There are three heart-shaped LED lights below this button that light up or blink in tune with the setting. There are three more buttons. An up arrow and a down arrow. Pressing the up arrow turns on the bead movement, of which there are three speeds. Pressing the down arrow does the opposite while the last button, which features arrows, changes directions. I wanted to press this button, though, because of how the main vibration button works. It seems off balanced to have three buttons for one function and a single for the other.

Because the silicone jack rabbit uses 3AAs, the vibrations in the clitoral attachment are pretty impressive. It’s the giant bullet style that I tend to like, too. The ears offer a lot of movement but I tend to prefer to press the body of the rabbit against my clit. The larger size will extend about 1.5″ (without the ears) to 2.5″ with the ears.

The beads are also pretty strong. I can stop them with my hand but only if I’m really squeezing it.

This rabbit features the easy remove battery pack. The cover has a knob you grasp to turn it. I find it a bit difficult because the cap is a shiny plastic. My fingers want to slip around and it takes a lot of effort to turn it in and out of place. There’s is a permanent O-ring around the area where the battery pack sits. It’s more secure-looking than many I’ve seen. I don’t use my toys in wet settings, typically, but I have no fear this toy will stand up during washing with soap and water. You could also use a toy wipe or cleaning spray, though.

This vibrator is priced lower than some of the Couture Collection and based on power alone, I think it’s a better deal. But it’s MSRP of $81.99 seems slightly high in my book. but Sextoy.com sells it for much less, a more reasonable price. At If you’re a diehard fan of the rabbit and want one that is higher quality than many on the market, you might consider the silicone jack rabbit.

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Categories: Reviews, Vibrators

Vanity by Jopen #4

November 3rd, 2011

Vanity by Jopen #4

Vanity by Jopen #4
from

This is an archived review of a discontinued product.

The VR-4 marks the third Vanity by Jopen rabbit that I’ve tried and the third that I didn’t like. All the shapes are just slightly different enough that I find it hard to figure out which would work for me. The Vr. 6 was extremely rigid. Like Lelo’s Ina, it was a little pinchy.. but I liked the vibrations.

The Jopen #4 actually differs in that the neck of the shaft is quite flexible so you can experiment a little more with positions. This means it may work better for a variety of users.. or so I’d guess. The head of the shaft is a rigid silicone, however, so you can still get pressure where you need it.

The shaft is also more angular, too. First, it curves backward to accommodate the pubic bone. Then it curves forward toward the G-spot. The very tip curves very slightly back once more. In use, it really presses up against the G-spot. This is good for squirting — I did a lot — and makes me feel fuller but the angle isn’t so good for thrusting. I find myself having to be a little more careful. #4 provides direct stimulation in the way that’s best for users who like to hold a vibrator against their G-spot. The angles make the 3.5″x 1.5″ shaft feel much larger than it is, in my experience. My cervix is a little unhappy.

The insertable portion runs on its own motor that is powered by a single button. I’ve described that in detail here so I won’t do it again. I like it but I’m not used to it. Every time I reach for a Jopen toy, I have to relearn the buttons. Unless CEN plans to make all its toys operate in this manner, I think maybe it should consider not reinventing the wheel.

The clitoral arm is also more flexible. It doesn’t seem to have the motor right in it but just under it, so the vibrations here are weaker than I recall the Vr 6. The silicone provides a firm but flexible stimulation that I would like, except the arms just too damned short for me. It measures just over an inch long and is about 4/5″ wide. It probably wouldn’t provide the broad pressure I like if it did reach, though. The clitoral stimulator gets its own button. See above for my thoughts.

Overall, the Vanity by Jopen #4 seemed a little less powerful than other Jopen vibrators. This is especially noticeable in the clitoral arm. At times, the shaft motor also seemed jerky. This isn’t something I’ve experienced before and it’s not a deal-breaker, but it’s interesting enough to note.

Like the other toys in the line, this toy is rechargeable (there’s a light on the toy itself to indicate status) and comes with the adapter and a super large storage bag. I mentioned it before, but it’s so stretchy that it’s almost unwieldy. I’m not a fan. Jopen vibes are all waterproof, made of non-porous silicone and not compatible with silicone lubes.

The flexibility is the strongest feature of the Vanity by Jopen #4. I like how it creates more room for the pubic bone, too, but it does so in a way that presses toward the back vaginal wall, and I don’t like that so much. If you want a decently powered vibrator and think that this one will fit your proportions, you could do much worse.

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Categories: Reviews, Vibrators

My Mini-Miracle Massager Pleasure Kit

October 12th, 2011

My Mini-Miracle Massager Pleasure Kit

My Mini-Miracle Massager Pleasure Kit
from

This is an archived review of a discontinued toy.

Sometimes, toys make it to the shelf with such a design flaw that I really have to wonder, “What were they thinking?” Such is the case with the My Mini-Miracle Massager Pleasure Kit. I was perplexed as soon as I opened the box but, you see, the description is kind of misleading. According to the website, “This complete kit contains 2 soft pliable attachments with the world famous Mini Miracle Massager.” So you would expect to receive a Mini Miracle Massager with some attachments and that, that I can live with. I would expect not to love every attachment but have a functional massager, nevertheless.

Wrong.

The problem is that it’s not a Mini Miracle Massager with some attachments (although, that already exists). It’s a model based on the Mini Miracle Massager, but there’s a permanent fixture on the head onto which you place attachments. The attachments are not part of a cup that goes over the head; rather, they both have a little hole that slides onto an awkwardly placed knob on the side of the wand. Perhaps it wouldn’t seem so awkward if you only used the pleasure kit for vaginal/internal stimulation because then you can aim the extension up and hold the handle perpendicular to your body. Unfortunately, I think of this type of toy as clitoral by default –and the tongue-shaped attachment certainly supports my conclusion — so I don’t want to do that.

Mini Miracle Massager Probe AttachmentI tried anyway. I put the little nubby attachment on first after giving it a good scrubbing. From the side, it looks like a character with a cartoonishly large nose. While the TPE attachments may be Phthalate-free, they freaking stink. I mean, pew! As suspected, the placement was awkward, and the shape was less than ideal for clitoral stimulation. I didn’t get off.

I had even less success with the tongue shape. I couldn’t figure out what I was supposed to do with it. The most comfortable way to hold it implies internal stimulation, but I don’t like tongue-shapes inside of me. To align the tongue with my clit, I’d either have to point the end of the handle between my knees or down toward my abdomen, so that was a no-go either.

My Mini Miracle MassagerI’d like to say the massager itself was redeemed, but it’s not because you can’t use it by itself. There’s a sticky-offy knobby thing that not only gets in the way but feels pretty unhygienic, too. The knob itself is unfinished, so water can get into it. The same is true for the extensions. You have a little less room to get in there and dry things off when you clean it, which I don’t like.

California Exotics has kept the same springy head and easy to use controls as the regular Miracle Massager, which I still love. There’s two speeds and an off. Unfortunately, this toy is pretty loud and not discreet at all. The vibrations are quite strong but not as deep as the Miracle Massager.

I’m not a fan of the detachable cord because it’s easy to mix it up with something else. If I can remove a cord, the toy should be rechargeable, which this isn’t. I don’t understand the point. This one is pretty long — upwards of three feet — but the adapter itself is overly large, clunky and annoying.

Annoying just about sums up the My Mini-Miracle Massager Pleasure Kit. Just buy your Mini Miracle Massager and attachments separately.

CEN Sexpert

2 Comments

Categories: Reviews, Vibrators

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