Womanizer X Lovehoney InsideOut

May 30th, 2021

It’s still masturbation May, and I am here to give you the first sex toy review in over two years and my first dual stimulator review since 2018 if you count the ridiculous toy Gvibe 2. Otherwise, you need to head way back into the archives to 2014 to find any sort of traditional rabbit vibrator (and it’s actually a butterfly).

Do you all remember the last time I wrote about air suction toys? I’ll forgive you if you don’t. It’s been almost four years! And I wasn’t particularly impressed, so I didn’t write a raving review. I quietly figured these toys weren’t for me until just recently. I figured that maybe the technology had improved, my body had changed, or I had simply used cheaper toys the first time around. This time, I was going to try a premium toy by Womanizer, one of the first companies to make clitoral suction toys, and Lovehoney. That’s how I wound up with the InsideOut, a dual stimulator that combines internal vibrators with clitoral suction, in my hands.

This toy doesn’t look like ye old rabbit vibrators, of which I tried quite a few before eventually backing away, too. I am sensing a theme here. The InsideOut does look quite bulky due to the clitoral stimulator. And the shaft, while described as for G-spot stimulation, doesn’t have any texture or much contouring. There’s a very similar toy, the Duo, with a shaft that looks a bit more interesting.

This toy doesn’t come charged like so many, so I had to charge it. It’s interesting because the charging light is inside the toy and easy to miss. It turns green when charging and appears red when powered on, making no sense because the nozzle blocks the light. What a strange and unhelpful design choice!

So how is it in use?

The InsideOut runs into the same problems that separately plague both dual stimulators and suction toys: no two bodies are exactly alike. It’s why so many reviewers quickly gave up on rabbit vibrators. It’s also why Womanizer sends multiple nozzles with its toys. InsideOut came with two to ensure the best fit.

My first go ’round with the InsideOut was a bit ill-advised. I was clearly not aroused enough. I didn’t use enough lube–or perhaps the wrong kind, and the thin shaft felt.. pokey. Furthermore, while I never felt like I got the proper seal, the suction was uncomfortable and overwhelming. I figured I’d give it a second go in the future.

A few erotica stories later with my body more aroused, I was ready to give this toy a second shot. This time, I used a thicker lube, and the shaft of the InsideOut was much more comfortable.

I am happy to report that the base, which initially seemed quite bulky, does effectively rest atop my thighs if I want a hands-free experience. If this toy works for you, you can sit back and let the toy do the work. In this position, the buttons face up, which makes them accessible but not viewable to me. I do wish the buttons were more distinct, both from the rest of the toy and from each other–each function has a + and – button, and you can operate the functions separately. The + buttons are raised, but the – buttons are inset and difficult for my fingers to find easily. The diamond layout also makes it a bit harder to discern which set of buttons I’m pushing.

I still find the general shape of the shaft to be rather bland. I think this was exacerbated by the fact that this toy is supposed to be all “Set it and forget it.” Womanizer highlights the contact-less usability of these dual stimulators. Still, I’ve always liked pressure and motion, both of which are limited with the InsideOut just as they are like Lelo’s Ora and most rabbit vibrators. If you move the external portion too much, you break the seal. Although, I have to admit that I never achieved the sort of seal that I was expecting with either of the nozzles. They’re easy to swap out and remove for cleaning, however.

Furthermore, the suction of this toy is ridiculously, distractingly loud. Like, I can’t believe it made it through quality control. I would have sent someone back to the drawing board. We’re not talking Hitachi levels of volume, but you can’t hear the vibrations at all when the suction is on. Combined with the fact that the vibrations are quite weak and buzzy, even on maximum, and this isn’t a good look. I honestly had to turn off the suction to even tell if the vibrations were on.

Once aroused, I no longer found the clitoral suction overwhelming. In fact, at points, I found it to be the exact opposite, perhaps due to me preferring pressure. And while the shaft was no pokey, it didn’t do much, and it still felt uncomfortably.. long? It’s only 4.5 inches long, but it’s so narrow, and you need to ensure the base is lined up properly, too. It didn’t just completely miss my G-spot, it targeted my cervix like an expert swordsman (I guess, I’m no medieval princess) and left me a bit crampy afterward.

Now, it might be due to the distance between my clitoris and vaginal opening, which requires me to insert the toy full to make contact externally. The base of the toy runs more parallel to my body than perpendicular. Some people with a shorter distance might be able to bend the shaft more, which means the base would be at more of an angle. But then I imagine you’d have to force the shaft against the back wall of your vagina, and that would be uncomfortable, too. I just want something a little plusher and more filling.

Anyway, by the end, I managed to get myself off. Not hands-free, of course. I rocked the base as much as possible against my body to get the pressure that I needed, but my orgasm was all due to my own efforts and not because of anything the toy brought to the table. If that’s going to be the case, I might as well reach for a standard vibrator.

Despite every effort by Lovehoney and Womanizer, the InsideOut doesn’t manage to avoid the pitfalls of a dual stimulator. Indeed, it actually manages to make them a bit worse because you don’t simply need to press a bullet against your clitoris, you need to line up the nozzle perfectly.

This doesn’t mean that InsideOut won’t work for anyone. In fact, many people might have bodies that are just more receptive to what this toy does, and hopefully, those people who you (or don’t) will stumble across this review and find it helpful.

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Embrace G Wand

August 11th, 2016

This is an archived review of a discontinued product.

Do you know what California Exotics is good at? It’s not really making amazing sex toys; although, you certainly could argue that the company is pretty good at churning them out. Henry Ford would be proud.

No, I think California Exotics is good at some other things, including:

  • Being late to the gate (rechargeable toys and silicone)
  • Designing toys that look premium and charging slightly less for them than those who did it first
  • ..but ultimately disappointing me

The Embrace line pretty much embodies all of these frustrations, and I should know better by now. This isn’t even the first toy I’ve tried from the line!

So you probably wanna know why I tried another one? I guess I’m just a glutton for punishment.

Okay, there’s at least one improvement over the G Wand from the Beloved Wand: it’s rechargeable and doesn’t just use AAA batteries. This should be a win, but if you thought that means it’s any stronger, well, you’re wrong. Probably. I no longer have the Beloved wand in my collection, but I can absolutely confirm that the power output of the G Wand isn’t what I expected because, you guys, there are three fuckin’ motors in here.

There’s one in the bulbous portion of the shaft, one in the neck and one between the clitoral nub and handle. The latter two are definitely smaller and weaker, but I can distinctly feel them in the setting that simply goes through each motor separately. But the overall impression on the steady vibration modes is just bland.

Seriously, though. It’s been a while since I’ve used a toy that just felt so “meh.” It’s odd because it feels stronger and deeper in my hand. The higher setting is noticeably buzzier, but it feels like it should do a decent job once inserted. It doesn’t, though. It may be the way the silicone absorbs the vibrations.

The G wand having a much more drastic curve than the Beloved wand. It reminds me of my Rondo, which I still have somewhere. In fact, I think the curve combined with the handle made it look like it would please me, and that was one of the main draws.

But I haven’t had a ton of success with G-spot wands that share this general shape. I’ve liked some, including the aforementioned Rondo and a toy by Ophoria. You may recall that I didn’t like the Pure Wand or the Comet, however, and many women have found those to be excellent G-spotters. To be fair, the Embrace G Wand is going to be a better tool for G-spot stim if you like those curves; although, there’s more flexibility than the Comet. So you may not be able to get a lot of intense play out of it.

To be fair, the Embrace G Wand is going to be a better tool for G-spot stim if you like those curves; although, there’s more flexibility than the Comet. So you may not be able to get a lot of intense play out of it.

As for the shaft, my favorite part was the rounded head, which I found to work decently for clitoral stimulation. However, the clitoral nub on the base of the shaft didn’t do it for me. In order to get it into the right position, the inner portion of the toy would cause pain. And the three ridges on the clitoral stimulator didn’t do it for me, anyway.

Is there anything I did like? I like the layout of buttons, which were easy to find. A single button switches through the seven settings (and powers the toy on/off), and each has six speeds. The other two turn the intensity up or down. I find it strange that the toy would start on the middle setting, however. It makes me think you’ll have a lot more power than you actually do. Who starts on medium and goes back down, anyway? But I was trying to be kind..

The loop in the handle was just big enough for a single finger, which I foud more useful than a toy whose loop is just shy of fitting two fingers. It feels pretty natural to slip my index finger through the hole and press buttons with my thumb.

It’s waterproof and recharges via USB. It’s not all that loud, so I might recommend it to someone who was looking for a vibrator of this shape but wanted more flexibility than the Comet and similar toys offer.

As for me? I really can’t quite put my finger on why the Embrace G Wand seems so lackluster. It has a less severe curve than toys that I really dislike, and the flexibility means I should at least be able to work with it. Perhaps I need to give it another go ’round before I toss it in the swap drawer. I’m just not looking forward to it.

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lingerie

Orchid G

April 7th, 2009

Orchid G
N/A from

This is an archived review of a discontinued product. For something similar, you might try Chelsi or Rose.

It took me a long time to warm up to the idea of a G-spot wand like the Orchid G, which was available by itself as well as in a combo with The Smart Girl’s Guide to the G-spot). I don’t really consider these toys to be attractive, and they don’t really seem to be as versatile as, say, a silicone vibrator. I finally decided to take the plunge when I saw Babeland offered it up for review, right around the time I was also trying out the Symphony G-Harmony (to refresh your memory, it didn’t work for me).

The Orchid G, which is pretty affordable at just $22, really isn’t a very flowery vibe, so I’m not sure about the name. The colours are a bit girly and my plastic, purple vibe is also glittery. Still, I don’t find it to be particularly attractive. However, it’s not very intimidating and just may make a good beginner’s toy. There’s no need to fear insertion with the Orchid G.

What you see really is what you get, in this case. In fact, I only got a cheap plastic bag with my Orchid G – and it was slipping halfway off in the shipping box. I would have appreciated the packaging to at least stay on during shipping. =/

The batteries are inserted at the end (2AA), and there is a dial control. The bulbous head of this toy, where the vibes are concentrated, looks like a bullet or egg vibe on a stick, and that’s pretty much what it is. The vibrations are surprisingly powerful, and the Orchid G is also louder than I would expect a toy of its size to be. The long shaft (the toy is 8″ long) allows you to penetrate yourself to reach a range of locations; ideally, every G-spot, no matter how shallow or deep, can be reached with the Orchid G. Plus, the angled head can be used to stimulate that sweet spot.

Except, in my experience. I read a lot of positive reviews, many from first-timers who were able to achieve G-spot orgasms from this and similar toys, but I was not to be included. I found that the wand was too long for my short arms. Because the only place you can really grasp this toy is at the base, otherwise the smooth plastic becomes too slick, I wound up actually pushing the head of the vibe toward the back wall of my vagina rather than toward my G-spot. In general, the toy simply jutted out too far from my vagina. A curved toy would be better for me.

At times I was able to stimulate my G-spot a bit but it wasn’t overwhelmingly pleasurable. I would find a spot that was good and lose the position I was in. I tried to grasp the handle higher up, but to no avail, because it would slip. On the plus size, insertion is really easy. I also noted that the base become rather warm during use. I usually cannot tell with a lot of toys because the motor is inserted and the toy warms up to my body heat as well, but it was very obvious that this toy becomes hot quickly. Perhaps I was just trying too hard and too long.

Not wanting to give up on this toy, I tried it as a clit toy but I found the hard, smooth plastic just didn’t stimulate my clit the way I wanted. It was actually painful. Also, with the long shaft, I could use this toy as I might normally use a bullet-style vibe (with lots of pressure and grinding) because the shaft would get in the way.

I really tried and tried, but by the time I finished, I was pretty frustrated. I was so sure the hard plastic and angled head of the Orchid G would work for me like it has so many others, but it just did not because of my specific anatomy. I have since then moved on to trying some alternative forms of G-spot stimulation, like the Pure Wand, which presented some unique frustrations. If you’re not so limited in the arm department, the Orchid G might just be your saving grace, but it wasn’t for me.

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Swingin’ Pendulum

February 19th, 2009

This is an archived review of a discontinued product.

When I picked out the Swinging Pendulum I was interested in triple stimulation. I’d just tried my first anal plug with a fair measure of success, and the “anal tingler” of this toy, paired with a thumb-like g-spot insertion and nubbed clitoral stimulator, seemed like a pretty package all wrapped up in pink. Unfortunately, there’s nothing swinging about this toy.

The Swingin’ Pendulum is little and cute – I would almost call it dinky. Made of hard plastic, the exterior of which is specially treated to result in a velvety texture (known as rubber/velvet cote), I liked how the Pendulum feels in my hand. Rubbercote can also be wiped down with an alcohol solution for sterilization or cleaned with soap and water.

This toy has a plug-in jack which, I think, is meant to make cleaning easier by allowing you to unplug the toy from the remote; the Swingin’ Pendulum is not waterproof. The remote control and battery pack felt alarmingly flimsy when empty, but the added weight of 2 AA batteries does improve this some. The remote features a dial control from “Off” to the highest “On” setting.

This sex toy is made up of 3 stimulators which combine to make the toy look like, well, a pendulum. The insertable, G-spot stimulator is thumb-shaped and curves slightly toward the front of the toy, where the G-spot would be. IT also has three pronounced rings toward the base. The clitoral stimulator makes up the front, bottom portion of the toy and has 2 rows of 3 evenly space nubs for a total of 6. I was initially put off of these nubs because they are hard. Finally, the anal stimulator tapers (like a.. tentacle?) and is topped off with a spherical knob.

Right out of the box (clear plastic with a half-naked blondie in the background – there isn’t a lot of useful information to be found), I tested out the vibrations. I had no problem inserting batteries or using the dial. The vibrations, which are centered in the bottom of the pendulum but translate to the insertable thumb pretty well, start off pretty mild, and as I turned them up, the vibrations changed smoothly without being too jerky. There is a light on the control pack which starts dim and grows much brighter as you turn up the vibrations and I suppose this would be nice in the dark. On the highest setting, this light makes the entire top half of the control glow.

One thing I found was that, at some point near maximum vibration, this toy starts to go wild. The vibrations become really shaky and unstable feeling, the light flickers a lot and the toy sounds as though it’s going to explode. I’m so not even kidding. It sounds like it’s really straining, as though California Exotic tried really hard to add some higher settings but this little toy just couldn’t handle it.

Testing aside, I wasn’t impressed. I didn’t realize how difficult to use and uncomfortable the Swingin’ Pendulum would be. My personal experience was that the clitoral stimulator was much too short to reach my clit unless I did something akin to the Hokey Pokey. The anal stimulator was also short and oddly placed so it simply sat between my cheeks and there was little vibration to be felt there. The G-spot stimulator carried the vibration the best but it wasn’t doing anything spectacular. I couldn’t even feel the nubs or rings and I wasn’t able to insert the toy as far as I would have liked because of its shape. The velvet cote mattered not to my girl parts.

The hard plastic has absolutely no give and, by now, I know there is no “one size fits all” when it comes to sex toys. I think a more giving material, like silicone, would make much more sense. Being able to adjust the clitoral and anal stimulators would have made this experience much more pleasant.  There was really only one part of this toy that did what it was supposed to, but I already have better G-spot vibrators.

Overall, this was a disappointing toy and experience. After using it, I actually felt a bit sore. The hard plastic meant I couldn’t grind against or rub the toy on me without it being painful. I could only really use it lying down (I thought I might be able to use it sitting, inside my panties) without it being uncomfortable and pinchy. Lastly, I took a closer look at the Swingin’ Pendulum and saw that it was not seamless; there were cracks and gaps where the pieces of the toy fit together, and I imagine this would be a perfect place for bacteria to hide – thus making this toy less sanitary than I’d like.

If you’re looking for triple stimulation or G-spot toys, there are many better options, including Mona.

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Deep Sea Pleasure Review

November 14th, 2008

I posted a new review for the Deap Sea Pleasure g-spot stimulator over at EdenFantasys.

2 Comments