Eden Waterproof Body Blossom

June 9th, 2010

This is an archived review of a discontinued toy.

Another dual stimulator? Yea! I love the idea. It’s why I’ve tried the Rock Chick, Mini G-rock, G-Ki, Gia, Adonis and Delight–not to mention a few non “c-shaped” toys. And I’ve got the Ultimate Satisfier waiting to be reviewed, too.

The Waterproof Body Blossom is part of a line of toys from Adam & Eve that promote their Eden movie. So I suppose the little flower clit stimulator makes sense, even if it’s a bit silly. The Body Blossom’s general shape is similar to the Rock Chick; the insertable portion is fairly straight with an angled head for G-spot stimulation. It’s more angled than round so both parts of the toy rest fairly close together in its natural state. However, the jelly in this toy is much more malleable than the Rock Chick’s silicone so there’s a greater range of movement. The Body Blossom also has 3 little wave-like ridges on the insertable shaft–to match the theme, I suppose.

The whole thing is translucent purple. I haven’t used a jelly toy in a while so I have to admit, I missed the look. There’s a matching purple micro bullet that slips into a snug hole near the clit flower. It’s a pretty generic bullet and operates with a single push button. You can easily replace it with any bullet that comes with silicone dildos (Tantus) and some corded bullets (you’ll probably get more power this way). The bullet takes three watch-style batteries, and Topco provides two sets to the consumer (one set comes in the bullet). Removing the bullet to swap out batteries requires a little finesse  finagling. I added some lube to the bullet before I slipped it back in, but it was still hard to remove again.

As you can expect, the vibrations are extremely buzzy, and while the bullet isn’t overly loud, the noise matches the feel. I was slightly disappointed at how the vibrations traveled throughout the toy. However, my G-spot seemed more sensitive to the vibrations than my hand, which is good. If you’re not as sensitive to vibrations, it might not do you any good.

That is, if the damned bullet works at all for you. From the get-go, the included bullet gave me problems. I tested it out, and the button didn’t seem to do what it was supposed to. I got it turned off–until my cat bumped it or my husband picked it up. Movement was setting this thing off at random times, and the button stopped responding at all. When it came time to use it, I dropped it on the dresser to turn it on and had to let the batteries drain completely before it would shut off. I inserted the second set to see if it was a battery issue but it still doesn’t work in a way I understand. Because of this, I’m not sure if this thing is maybe supposed to have multiple settings or if it just really sucks. Of course, like I said, it’s easy to replace, so even if I were a customer, I wouldn’t try to exchange it or anything.

The jelly of the Body Blossom is phthalate-free, so it doesn’t smell like a shower liner. It has that slightly chemical-ly scent that some TPR toys have, but it’s within reason, I think. It’s a little sticky and will pick up lint and add friction during play. You can use your choice of water or silicone-based lubes. I actually used Wet Synergy, a hybrid lube. Even though I went a little lube-crazy, the Body Blossom just didn’t blossom for my body. The wave ridges made it a bit difficult to maneuver, and I tend to like my G-spot toys with a little less angle to the head.

I also like external pressure a lot, but the flexibility of this toy didn’t provide that. The flower rested gently against my labia. It’s a problem I and others with fleshier vulvas run into with this style of toy; I experienced it with Rock Chick, too. I couldn’t really spread my labia to fix the issue, either. The angle of the toy meant that it kept trying to slip upward toward my mons instead of staying in place. This is pretty typical for this style toy. I can get either G-spot stimulation or clit stimulation but not both simultaneously.

I didn’t love either aspect of the Body Blossom enough that I’m really upset, however. I guess I need a shaft with less going on for consistent G-spot stimulation, and I don’t usually like my clitoral vibrators to have little fluttery bits. I would definitely recommend the Rock Chick or Delight over the Body Blossom, although they’re both a little more expensive. I think the Body Blossom is discontinued, anyway.

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The Wave

October 8th, 2009

Wave Purple

Wave Purple
N/A from

This is an archived review of a discontinued product.

The Wave is a dual stimulator that is a little different than either your typical rabbit (or even the slimmed-down styles like the Silicone Intimate Diver, which I’ve tried) or C-shaped vibes (Rock Chick, anyone?), but that is exactly why it drew my attention. The longer handle which extends up toward the body, instead of away, drew me by its maneuverability.

It also made for a good size reference, in my opinion. Sometimes those C-shaped dual stimulators are totally off base when it comes to size. Upon opening the package (a colorfully decorated plastic box), I noticed how long the toy was. From tip to tail, it’s got some length – 10″ – and there’s the cord (which is a comfortable 27″ or so) and control/battery pack on top of it, but that was to be expected.

What I wasn’t expecting was just how rigid the jelly material would be. I mean, jelly toys tend to be softer as a given. That’s precisely why some people prefer them but The Wave is definitely an exception. It’s not rock hard but it’s as firm or possibly firmer than some silicone toys I’ve tried. This really perplexes me because both the G-spot and clit stimulators have nubs on them, resulting in a potentially painful combination, especially if you like to grind like me. Furthermore, some people might find the nubs a hindrance to insertion so I’d recommend a water or silicone based lube. Otherwise, the firmness is something a lot of folks look for when it comes to G-spot stimulation. It just seems like a bad idea when paired with equally firm nubs.

The curve opening on this toy is also a bit wider (4″ from point to point), which contributes to the overall length. This will probably be good if your G-spot is deeper or if your clit is further from your vagina but I found that the nubby G-spot end slid right past my G-spot when the clitoral end was on my clit and vice versa. Although the firmness meant I was still able to use the shaft for G-spot stimulation, I was never able to use it exactly how it’s supposed to be used, nor would I want to. I tried to press the clitoral nubs against my body but quickly stopped because I’m not a big fan of (that type of) pain.

In terms of vibrations, the Wave runs on 2AA batteries. The control pack has two buttons – up and down – and a light to denote each setting of vibration. It’s a velvety, rubber-cote-style controller which is easy to hold but nothing special. The 4 settings are all steady, and the higher frequency vibration is centered at the clitoral nubs. Intensity definitely decreases toward the G-spot stimulator. The Wave has a decent amount of vibration and my G-spot responded well. However, it’s worth noting that my G-spot is much more sensitive to vibes than my clit. Within a matter of moments, I was able to squirt despite the shortcomings of the Wave.

As its name suggests, the Wave is waterproof. The battery cap screws on tightly and there is also a rubber O-ring. The cord seems fairly secure where it attaches to the controller but not quite as secure where it attaches to the toy itself. Because of this, I probably wouldn’t submerge the wave. I’d stick to shower time.

The waterproofing makes washing with soap and water easy. I would recommend doing this before and after each use because of jelly’s porous nature. Swapping between partners or holes it something I can only suggest with condoms. While still tacky to the touch, the Wave seems less guilty of attracting lint as other jelly, probably because it’s so hard. Also, beware that skunky, jelly scent. The Wave is no exception in that department.

The Wave was quite successful at making me wet, although not at getting me off, and I expect at least one type of orgasm when it comes to dual-stimulation vibrators. I think I would have been able to wrangle the Wave into an effective orgasm machine had Doc Johnson decided to make it either firm or nubby. As is, the Wave is no treat, and I couldn’t even experiment with the handle because it hurt my clit. Still, I think Doc Johnson is on to something and, with a few modifications, this toy could make waves.

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Phthalates: Do you really care?

June 16th, 2009

I’m just curious.

I’m tending toward the healthier side of the “what my sex toys are made of” spectrum, slowly but surely. But I do have to say that I’m still exploring enough that I don’t like to rule out toys which seem to have great functions because of material alone. If I’m comparing 2 very similar toys, I’d go for one which was Phthalate free over one which has Phthalates. Really, I’m just not a person to concern myself over things (which also seem unsubstantiated) if it’s going to severely inhibit my fun. Of course, there are a lot of sex toy options which is why, through very little conscious effort, much of my collection is Phthalates free.

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Venus Penis

May 16th, 2009

Venus Penis
N/A from

This is an archived review of a discontinued product. You can buy this similar product, but I’m not sure why you’d want to.

Dear California Exotic Novelties,

Size matters. I’m not sure if you missed the memo or if you’re so sure of yourself that you think the rules don’t apply to you but they do. Let me repeat it: size matters. No, it’s not the only thing that matters. So do quality, forethought, creativity and function, all of which you utterly failed to bring to the table when you decided to make yet another pitiful “hands free” vibrator: the Venus Penis. I know that out of the hundreds or thousands of sex toys you will make, some of them are destined to succeed but is that good enough reason for the rest of them to be so horrid? In short, California Exotic, your toy sucks. You suck.

For starters – and let’s kick it off with the big one – I only chose the Venus Penis after having such a disappointing time with my first (and last, until now) strap on vibrator because it has a penis. At least, I thought it did. Your pictures and packaging make it seem mysteriously larger than it actually is. It almost looks like a nice, meaty cock will well defined head. What it actually is, is a finger which has mutated with the head of a cock. It might be a meaty finger, but it’s not much when it comes to insertion. If any of you have vaginas, stick your thumb in it. Wow! See what that does?

Absolutely nothing!

On the topic of size, I have a bone to pick with toy manufacturers who assume that the vagina, clit and anus are all within some 3″ diameter. They’re not. Really. Add an inch or 2 or, hell, even 4 for good measure and then the “erotic clitoral” stimulator and “superior anal” stimulator might reach their target. I mean, come on, can you really call something that doesn’t touch anything superior? I think not.

On a semi-related note, I guess you don’t like fleshy girls. My mons and labia are pretty prominent, which means if I even want clit stimulation, I have to push my lips aside and hold the toy against me. So much for hands-free, huh? Really, all you need to do is make the clit stimulator longer and soft enough so I can adjust it to where I need it.

And while we’re on the subject of inferiority (we are, aren’t we?), let’s talk about the material. Jelly? Really? It smells out of the box and, you’re lucky, because many folks won’t even touch the stuff anymore, but I’m not so picky. And, I’m not sure how you did it, but the jelly is actually rather stiff. The wings kept poking my poor thighs uncomfortably. What gives? (Haha! Nothing, because if the toy had give, it wouldn’t hurt). And the straps? Cheap elastic, which, while soft and shouldn’t hurt, began to chafe after a while.

So where were we? Creativity? Check – I mean, not really. I liked the idea of overall external stimulation combined with internal vibration so I think you tried to do something a little more original, here, but failed. That’s because you lack my next point:  forethought. I probably think more than most people and it doesn’t always do me any good but your lack of thought, period, does me no good. I mean why put the penis in the middle of the butterfly’s tummy when the toy is designed to sit forward, not really under you? This means the already-crappy penis is inserted at an awkward, yes even painful, angle. Maybe that’s why you made it so short? You knew we’d be feeling it but did you count on us saying “Ouch!”?

It also doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that the thigh and waist strap set up just doesn’t work. The entire time I had this thing on (although I must commend you for making this wearable by a large variety of sizes), the toy pulled up and to the front instead of where I wanted it to sit, y’know, against my clit! I think that straps which mimic the shape of a bikini or even like a G-string would make more sense. Plus, the placement made sitting uncomfortable. I’m pretty sure the position the woman is, on the package, is the only feasible position and, even doing that, the anal stimulator kept stabbing at my perineum.

Furthermore, when is someone going to make detachable straps so we can toss them in the washer? Oh, wait, the customer would never know how to put them back on and it’s not our fault. It’s because the setup is ridiculously complicated (remember when I suggested you mimic a well-known set up like panties? That might come in handy, now). I mean, if we could take off the straps without fearing we’d never get them back on correctly, we might use the toy a lot more because cleaning would be so much easier.

Well, maybe. Except for the part where a wire comes out of the toy through a hole in the belly, near the front. I understand it needs to connect to the control pack somehow (standard, CE dial-style controls), but not only does it make cleaning harder than it should be (and you can certainly rule out waterproof capabilities) but it’s kind of weird for the wire to come out from between my lips.

What we’re left with here is function. I would expect strong vibes from a toy powered by 2AA batteries. This wasn’t really the case. However, I did find that I was left with a pleasant tingle and, with a lot of holding the toy and grinding against it, I did get off. Still, I have toys that can do this better, easier, and faster, like my Laya Spot, and if that was all I wanted from this toy, I wouldn’t have purchased it. I got absolutely nothing from the penis on this toy at best, when it wasn’t being painfully mediocre, literally.

You might be wondering now if there was anything I did like. Yes, I liked the colour of this. It’s a neat dark fuchsia. It’s just too bad the shape of the toy isn’t aesthetically appealing; otherwise, I might just consider not throwing it away.

Also, the awkward pose of the “model” on the packaging makes me smile. I mean, who wouldn’t? The fake breast groping and the forced smile are just so strange. I can’t help but laugh. Thanks for that, California Exotic Novelties, and not much else.

Sincerely,

Me

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Sex Toy Materials at a Glance

November 24th, 2008

I am a little concerned about sex toy materials. Being, that I would prefer to use safer and higher quality toys but I would likely not completely rule out certain materials because they are not as quality. It really depends on the toy in question.

However, keeping track of sex toy materials – of which there are many – can be difficult even if you make an effort to be aware. So, I thought I’d provide a fact sheet detailing some of the common materials used for sex toys in descending order of quality. (I’m excluding things like wood, glass and metal which are much less confusing.)

Elastomed
Elastomed is a medical grade elastomer derivative which is nonporous, phthlalate free, hypoallergenic, odorless and completely safe. These toys are safe to use with either silicone or water based lubricants. Sex toys made of Elastomed tend to be less pliable. Although Elastomed shares many of the same great characteristics as silicone, it should not be boiled or wiped with an alcohol or bleach solution.
Silicone
100% silicone is nonporous, therefore it can be sterilized by boiling for 3 minutes or washing them in your dishwasher (top shelf, no mechanical toys, remove bullets) which makes them safe for sharing. It also does not contain potentially harmful chemical softeners known as phthalates. Silicone is rather pliable, comes in many colours and densities and also retains heat (try warming before use) which makes it very popular.

There is some debate about whether silicone toys can be used with silicone lubricants. Pure silicone toys can be used with silicone toys. However, toys need only contain 10% silicone to be labeled as such so your toy and lube (or if you store several silicone toys touching) may appear to “react” with eachother. This is actually the melting of chemical softeners in your toy which indicates that it is not pure silicone. However, you should spot test your toys to check. It is always safe to use a water based lube with silicone toys.
VixSkin Silicone
VixSkin Silicone is a 100% premium silicone product from Vixen Creations and is safer than other skinlike materials without losing its realistic feel. The material in VixSkin Silicone is nonporous and can be sterilized by boiling for 3 minutes, wiping down with a 10% bleach solution or washing in the dishwasher. Like silicone toys, it is best not to use silicone based lubricants with VixSkin Silicone because it may cause a reaction. Spot test your toy in an inconspicuous place if you would like to use silicone based lube.
TPR Silicone
TPR Silicone is a mix of Silicone and ThermoPlastic Rubber (see below). This phthalate free composite is 10% silicone or more and generally has no taste or smell. Hardness varies in TPR silicone which can be very pliable. It is less porous than jelly but cannot be sterilized so sharing should only be done with condoms. TPR Silicone can be cleaned with a toy cleaner of soap and water and, to ensure a long life of your TPR silicone toy, it should only be used with water based lubricants.
TPR
TPR, or Thermo Plastic Rubber, Silicone is a blend of silicone and rubber. Although it is less porous than rubber it is still slightly porous, thus it cannot be sterilized like pure silicone but can easily be cleaned with warm water and soap or a toy cleaner. TPR toys should not be boiled. If you plan to share TPR toys, use them with a condom. TPR Silicone is pliable, easy to wash and phthalate-free. TPR toys can be used with water or silicone based lubricants.
TPE
Thermoplastic Elastomers (Elastormer, TPE Plastic) are not nonporous and is essentially the same as TPR. However, they are less porous than materials such as Cyberskin. Like TPR toys, TPE sex toys should not be boiled and cannot be disinfected. These toys can be cleaned with warm water and soap or an antibacterial toy cleaner. If shared, use condoms with Elastomer sex toys. TPE is often used in toys which have several textures. Like TPR, TPE can be used with water or silicone based lubricants.
Jelly
Jelly is a common sex toy material and may be cheaper than silicone alternatives. However, it is also more inferior in quality. Jelly toys are made of PVC which is chemically softened with phthalates, a potentially harmful ingredient which causes jelly toys to have an unpleasant and sometimes stubborn “rubber” smell. Jelly toys are soft and pliable and come in many colours. Jelly toys are porous and cannot be sterilized so they should only be shared if condoms are used. Condoms may also prolong the life of jelly sex toys. Jelly toys can be used with both water and silicone based lubes, should be cleaned with warm water and mild soap and store in a cool environment.

Jelly may be a term given to any soft sex toy when the material is actually higher quality of traditional PVC jelly.
Rubber
Rubber sex toys generally contain latex, an ingredient to which many people are allergy. Latex toys are also lower quality than other sex toy materials and have a shorter life, even when looked after carefully. Rubber toys usually have a strong smell that may never be completely eliminated. Rubber toys are nonporous, thus they cannot be sterilized and you should use condoms with rubber toys you plan to share. Rubber toys can be cleaned with warm water and soap but should never be boiled. Rubber toys come in over 260 different colours, are cheap to make (and buy) and are soft which make rubber one of the most popular sex toy materials. Rubber toys can be used with silicone or water based lubricants.
Cyberskin
Cyberskin and other skin-like materials (Pure skin, SoftTouch, SoftSkins, PassionSkin, Futurotic) tend to be the least safe materials in the sex toy market because they are so porous. However, what they lack in safety may be counteracted by their flesh-like appeal to some folks. Cyberskin and similar toys can be cleaned with soap and water but never can be disinfected so use with a condom is a must if sharing toys. Using a condom may also be beneficial even if you do not share Cyberskin toys because these materials may contain potentially harmful chemical softeners known as phthalates which can also cause reactions between toys so store your Cyberskin toys away from eachother and silicone toys as well. Use only water based lubes with these toys and store them in a cool, dark place. Many of these toys arrived dusted in cornstarch and should be stored as such when you are finished with them (but not talc!) Condoms may prolong the life of these toys but do not expect Cyberskin and similar toys to last a lifetime.

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Cup n Cradle

October 22nd, 2008

Cup n Cradle

This is an archived review of a discontinued product.

I love dual stimulators, having mostly used rabbits and wanting to expand my repertoire, I decided to try the Cup N Cradle. It’s a reasonably priced and unique-looking toy, so I gave it a shot. The Cup ‘n Cradle is really the first of its type to grace the market. With its knobby G-spot stimulator stemming from the cradle-shaped clitoral stimulator, which rests against your clit with its many soft finger-like protrusions, the Cup N Cradle is certainly different from any dual stimulation vibrator, let alone the traditional vibe! With a remote attached by wire and a vibrator bullet, the Cup N Cradle certainly seems inviting, and its small size is perfect for even a first-timer. Did I mention it’s made completely of a soft, semi-transparent jelly?

This toy seems foolproof. Slip the G-spot stimulator into your vagina, and the clitoral stimulator will cover a wide surface area around your clit to give you increased pleasure over other, smaller clitoral stimulators. Slide the button on the remote up, and you will feel pleasurable vibrations wash over your most sensitive spots. Grasp the toy as its base and apply pressure and movement to your heart’s desire.

However, while the toy may be wonderful in theory, it falls short in application. I found that the jelly material, the position of the bullet vibrator, and the controls were all lacking in some way, and this proved detrimental to the experience.

Although the Cup N Cradle is powerful for such a small unit, it’s best to always use it with fresh batteries. Batteries anything less than new will provide a less intense vibration, as with many toys. With a new pair of AAs, the Cup N Cradle was too strong for me to use at top speed. It was most comfortable somewhere in the middle.

While a strong vibrator is generally a positive thing, the location of the bullet meant most of the vibrations were concentrated on my hand rather than my clitoris or G-spot. In fact, while the bullet did stimulate my clitoris, the vibrations were non-existent when it came to the G-spot stimulator. Many of my sessions were cut short because my hands were so irritated from taking the brunt of the vibrations. Needless to say, I was not an orgasmically happy camper on these occasions.

One of the most noticeable aspects of the toy is its soft jelly material. For anyone who likes their toys soft and closer to the ‘real thing,’ the Cup N Cradle might be right up their alley, and it definitely allows for a lot of flexibility. It especially feels nice over the clitoris and the surrounding area, with the tiny nubs rubbing against flesh. The cradle provides a unique suction to the skin, which is quite pleasurable.

However, I have found that the jelly material of this toy is, perhaps, too soft. I cannot achieve the desired pressure that I need to easily orgasm with such a soft toy. This is especially a problem when it comes to achieving the pressure that many women need on their G-spot, especially when the vibrations are so weak in that part of the toy.

Also, the sliding control leaves much to be desired. I’m not sure if all sliding controls are so ineffective, but the Cup N Cradle did not have nearly the range of vibration intensity that I expected after several uses. It seems that somehow the slider had loosened up, requiring that the button be slid nearly 3/4 of the way up before the vibrator even turned on, greatly reducing the range of vibrations. At this point, the Cup N Cradle is vibrating at almost full force. However, if I press the slide down forcefully with my fingers, I can turn the Cup N Cradle on at a lower setting. This does not make for a relaxing experience.

Furthermore, the slider does not allow the vibrations to increase gradually and smoothly. Instead, the vibrations increase in a rather jerky manner, which can be a bit distracting. I would prefer a remote with digital buttons or another type of technology that offers more precise control over the vibrations of the toy.

Overall, the Cup N Cradle isn’t bad. With a little patience and practice, it can be quite the diligent helper when it comes to achieving orgasm, especially with its strong vibrations and wide coverage obe improvedoral area. However, the Cup N Cradle would be improved with a firmer material, better bullet placement, and controls that are smoother and more precise.

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lingerie