Lelo Siri 2

January 27th, 2015

Siri 2
N/A from

This is an archived review of a discontinued product. Lelo now makes the Siri 3.

If you were to look at Siri 2 without the original to compare, you’d think they were exactly the same design. This isn’t exactly true. Siri 2 is a little sleeker, for example. Perhaps to make it less obtrusive during use with a partner. Siri 2 is completely waterproof, though. Bonus if you like shower masturbation, but you’re definitely not going to get use out of the sound-response feature in the shower.

The silicone on Siri 2 also feels more plush and smooth to the touch. Although, this isn’t something I really noticed in use. Siri 2 is just a hair shorter from tip to tip, and the silicone tip is a bit more pointy than the original. But these are all minuscule changes that neither enhance or detract from the design of the original. I do like my Siri 2 in black, but you have to choose from pink or purple if you don’t like black.

Unlike Lelo’s other sophomore vibrators, Siri 2 is noticeably stronger than the original. However, the increase in power also comes with an increase in vibration frequency, so it feels buzzier. I can deal with a vibration that’s a little weaker but more rumbly. It’s part of the reason why I still love my Layaspot. However, the buzzy vibrations of the Siri 2 could be improved upon. I’m not sure they’re a deal breaker.

Although.. the weird music-inspired settings of this clitoral vibe aren’t really doing it for me. I’m not a fan of those extra modes at all, so I’m a bit surprised that I like even one of them. However, there’s something about a steady pulsation that seems preferable to me than these musical vibration modes, which don’t have quite the right rhythm to keep my clit interested. And let’s be honest, the description is pretty pretentious, too:  classical, reggae, rumba, folk, hip hop, soul, techno, and jazz. Uh, okay. Right.

But maybe that’s not why you’re looking at Siri 2. You want to know about how a vibrator can interact with sound because that sounds (pun intended) interesting at the very least. You want to know if it’s a feature worth adding to a toy to begin with let alone buying as a consumer?

Well. Nah. Not really.

Let’s back up. This vibrator “listens” to sounds. It can be any type of sound as far as I can tell. For example, blowing on it will cause it to respond. So will singing and moaning.. if you’re in the right position. You see, the microphone or whatever-it-may be exists at the end where the charting port it. Tapping the port is enough to get the vibrator to respond.

But the sound needs to be close enough to Siri 2; otherwise? Nada. So while I was trying to use it and sing or moan, it couldn’t pick me up.  I don’t particular masturbate to some sound. Although, I happened to have my earbuds on the nightstand next to me, so I gave it a test. I cannot begin to describe how awkward this was, but I can tell you that all my awkward effort was for nothing. Even with sound on max and my earbuds right next to Siri 2, it couldn’t pick it up.

Now, this might work if someone was using it on me and their mouth was closer to the toy, but it makes the function pretty much useless if you’re using it solo. And the argument could be made that you should pop in your favorite CD or log on to a porn site and turn up your speakers. Indeed, those background noises might even drown you out but it doesn’t even work. I have to turn my laptop on maximum and hold Siri 2 right next to my speakers to get it to respond. I don’t think my neighbors like that, folks.

It’s weird. When Siri 2 does manage to respond to sound, there’s a delay. I understand why this might be the case, but it’s altogether too distracting to find the perfect blend of volume and rhythm to get myself off when I know that simply using Siri 2 as a vibrator will work just as well. Plus, you can’t really recognize the “source” sound, anyway.

Original Siri (red) versus Siri 2

Original Siri (red) versus Siri 2

PLUS! Lelo’s 4-button configuration is really not the smartest way to go about this. It works fine for the steady vibration and music-inspired modes, but you have to simultaneously hold two buttons (either the + and – or the two arrows, I forget) for 5 seconds to turn on the stupid audio-responsive mode, anyway. It’s finicky and clumsy and not something I’m going to bother with. Sorry not sorry. That extra button that you’ll find on Ora 2 and other Insignia vibes would have been a much better option to control this additional setting, but I do understand that Lelo would have to redesign the control pad to

So while I have plenty of negatives to say about Lelo’s newest Siri, I will probably keep it charged for use. Because it is a more powerful version of a vibrator that I’ve already come to like, and the form factor works pretty well if I’ve got another vibe or dildo inserted. In fact, I really enjoyed using it in conjunction with Lelo’s Mona Wave, another new-ish vibe that I’ll be reviewing shortly.

However, that’s not what Lelo wants us to focus on. It’s not the selling point, and I’m not sure if you can be sold when there are other alternatives for less than $100 that aren’t as frustrating and gimmicky!

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Songs I Want to Post

February 6th, 2013

Being Facebook friends with the potential-dude-gone-totally-emo has its downfalls. Like, I totally can’t post videos that seem pertinent to my situation for fear that he’ll take them the wrong way. I know, I know.

So forgive if this sounds teenagery or, really, if all my recent posts do. Dating is new to me. Having sex with more than one guy in my life is new to me. These are not things I as able to do ten years ago, and I don’t even think I’m doing them well now. But I’m trying.

And on an everyday basis, I don’t listen to every song and think “This is sooo me.” It’s just that these two songs really seem to sum up how I’m left feeling after this whole.. experience.

The first song is one that I loved immediately when I downloaded Kelly Clarkson’s Stronger. I was so surprised that “Dark Side” became a single while “Don’t Be A Girl About It” didn’t. It’s catchy and, dare I say, fierce. Granted, I don’t necessarily condone the idea that being a “girl” is negative, but it’s a damn fine way to drive home the point.

If there were any specific lyrics that I thought summed up my thoughts, these are it:

It’s getting old, your ‘poor me’ thoughts
Believe me boy when I say ‘so what’
This broken record thing has got to stop
I’m losing interest in your pillow talk

I mean, it was two weeks, dude! Get over it/me/us/yourself. Grow a pair. Grow the fuck up. Life goes on. I’ve been fighting the urge to post this song on the guy’s wall or my own wall for weeks. I immediately thought of it when this shit went down.

On the other hand, I hadn’t listened to “King Of Anything” for quite some time, so it wasn’t until when I was in the shower yesterday that I realized how perfect it also was for the situation.

Both these women are great singers, but Sara has that singer-songwriter thing going on that I was really into a couple years ago.

You sound so innocent
All full of good intent
You swear you know best

But you expect me to
Jump up on board with you
Ride off into your dellusional sunset

I’m not the one who’s lost
With no direction oh
But you won’t ever see

You’re so busy makin’ maps
With my name on them in all caps
You got the talkin’ down just not the listening

The recurring theme that she doesn’t need to save her hits home because the emo guy actually said something about how “He wanted to fix things/me” as if I were broken. I am not broken. I do not need fixing. I am just not that into you, dude. This guy was sort of an accidental douche. He didn’t intend to be but his “woe is me” attitude meant he wound up treating me like crap in some ways because he couldn’t get beyond his own hurt, which wasn’t really anyone’s fault. I didn’t mean to break his heart. He should keep that thing on a leash.

You can’t mainsplain away my feelings. Just stop talking. You don’t know me better than I do, mmkay?

So, thanks to Kelly and Sara for singing it like it is. Less thanks to the emo dude for his shitty reaction to the letdown.

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Get up to 30% off at MysteryVibe

OhMiBod Freestyle

January 1st, 2011

While OhMyBod no longer makes the original Freestyle, there is a newer G-spot version.

It may come as a surprise to some to read that, despite the fact that I own more vibrators, dildos, sex toys and massage candles than any person ought to own, I hadn’t tried an OhMyBod vibe until just recently. The company was wonderful when I contacted them about reviewing a product and it wasn’t long before I was holding my very own OhMiBod Freestyle vibrator.

And it’s a big ol’ box! The Freestyle comes in one of the largest packages that I have seen for non-rabbit vibrators. A white box opens to reveal yet another container, this one a plastic box with rounded corners that actually contains the vibrator. For some reason, I had a hell of a time opening the box for the first time, but I have since been able to open it with more ease.

The larger box also contains AC adapters for use in other countries, the charger, the wireless transmitter (with batteries), and a 12” AUX input connector—the type of connector that headphones use. Now, I am no stranger to technology or sex toys, but I definitely had to consult the instructions to figure out how to set this all up. The booklet may come in many languages, but the connection instructions are really small and easy to miss.

Basic usage includes connecting the headphone jack of your music source. Then, to enjoy music, you can plug your actual headphones into the other end of the transmitter or connect the included AUX input cord to some speakers while the MP3 connector goes into your music source.

After turning the cap to the music setting, it will vibrate in tune with your music, and, boy, is that something else. It really is. As everyone else has stated, your favourite song may not work so well with OhMyBod vibrators, even if a song you consider quite sexy. Some songs barely register at all and produce pretty much a constant vibration, while other songs are more effective with the use of the Freestyle vibrator. I find it nearly impossible to detect with songs will work best with the Freestyle, to be honest. It’s really a tossup and you’ll have to adjust the sensitivity on the transmitter (via a volume-type wheel) for every song that plays.

Of course, even if your song produces an interesting vibration, it may not be enough to get you off. This is probably why OhMiBod designed this vibrator with a basic vibration mode they call “manual.” To use it, simply turn the cap to the furthest setting and adjust the strength and mode with “-“ and “+” buttons. I think it’s a little easier to gauge the strength and type of vibrations this way, too. Freestyle has more shallow vibrations, but they are strong. For example, stronger than We-Vibe or Lelo’s rechargeable vibrators. OhMiBod describes a total of seven settings for manual mode: low, medium, high, escalation, fast pulsation, super speed pulsation, and a short-short-long pulsation. As far as I can tell, the pulsation modes are only available in one strength, but they are pretty strong.

So when you’ve found your perfect song of whether you’ve just turned on the manual modes, you’ll probably wind up inserting the Freestyle vibrator. This one in a straight, cylindrical vibrator with rounded ends. I was a bit surprised at how large it was. I think I was expecting something closer to the Alumina vibrator I reviewed, but this one is much longer (8”) and girthier (1 1/8”). It’s still a smaller vibrator in terms of width but bigger than I expected.

Because it is so straight, it’s a general vibrator. I can stimulate my G-spot with straight vibrators because of its location but everyone can. Despite its rigidity, Freestyle feels softer to the touch because of the velvety treatment of the ABS plastic. This is something that I have difficulty feeling in use, however.

There are a couple of unique points about the Freestyle. It is listed as splash proof, which makes me think the best use is in the tub or shower, with your transmitter connected to some speakers. This method also aids in discretion and can help cover the noise from the vibrator itself. If privacy is a concern, I would warn you that the Freestyle, while not the loudest vibrator I’ve ever tried, isn’t as quiet as I’d like it. It reminds me of a small RC car, and the sound actually competes with the sound of the music when I use headphones. On that note, some of my earbuds sound distorted when using the Freestyle’s transmitter—but not all of them.

The included manual states that you can expect the transmitter to work up to 25 feet away from the vibrator itself, so you could technically use it—or let someone else use it—in another room if you wish. I have successfully used it up to fifteen feet away, but, like any wireless device, walls can be problematic, so I doubt it’d work if you have your own bomb shelter but forgot the Freestyle’s transmitter outside. Or something. You know.

So, while it’s a novel item that won’t become my go-to toy, Freestyle is decent and, even if it was just a rechargeable vibrator, it would get the job done. But I don’t love it.

The Freestyle makes a rattling sound when used. It’s almost as if the casing isn’t quite as snug as it should be and music that makes it pulsate a lot highlights this. Additionally, it takes two hours to charge and while that is supposed to provide five hours of usage, I didn’t even get a full hour before mine died. Lastly, the “convenient” travel case is, quite simply, stupid. Everyone knows that when you’re traveling, you don’t want something bulky and that is exactly what the travel case is. OhMiBod could take a cue from Lelo and simply include a storage pouch for the adapter, vibrator and transmitter. For this same reason, some consumers will throw away the case simply because of limited storage space. It’s a nice idea (the foam cutouts fit the pieces perfectly, and there are even holes for removing the vibe and transmitter so it doesn’t get stuck), but not the best idea.

My gripes about the Freestyle by OhMiBod really are minimal, however. If you’re the type of person who really enjoys playing with things because of their “neat” factor and have the $130 to spare, you should pick it up. If novelty doesn’t do it for you, however, I’d skip this toy.

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