Smooth Lover

June 26th, 2012

Smooth Lover

Smooth Lover

This toy has been discontinued.

The Smooth Lover dildo from MyPleasure is actually one that I’d had my eye on for a long time. I mean, it’s just so pretty, but it doesn’t look like it’d do anything for me. For a while, no dildo did, and my luck is inconsistent even today. I took the plunge and asked to review it this month, and I’m, torn. On one hand., it’s a pretty, pink, silicone dildo and I kind of want to stick it to my wall–you can do that with the suction cup base–and look at it all day. On the other hand, I never want to use it again.

So, this dildo isn’t actually smooth. There are embossed swirls and such on it, which is exactly what gives its the pretty appearance. The silicone at the base spreads and thins out to create the suction cup, and there’s a slightly contoured head that had a ridge of silicone around it. Under the head, at the frenulum area, is this little nub of silicone. It’s kinda cute, but also sort of weird. You can imagine this is intended to stimulate the g-spot because the dildo is perfect straight otherwise. It feels interesting to begin with. Even though the dildo isn’t smooth, the scrollwork can’t be felt internally. Most people have mentioned that. However, the nub can. At first, I liked it and then it very quickly started to irritate the inner wall of my vagina, so I stopped playing with it.

I think I prefer my vibrators straighter and my dildos curved. I don’t like to stroke as much as I like to clench around a dildo. It was also a little awkward to hold this one. I wound up sort of pinching the base, because it’s only 6″ long, and there’s not a lot of room to grip it down there. I constantly felt as though it was going to slip out of my hand. I was pretty surprised by the firmness, or lack thereof. I think everyone who’s ever written a review for this toy has come to a different conclusion. The core is definitely firm, but it’s softer toward the base, and you can bend it a bit. It’s still not the best for g-spotting, in my opinion. Neither is the base wide enough for strap-on usage.

So, the chance to review this dildo pretty much confirmed my fears. Yes, it’s pretty. Yes, the suction cup works really well. It’s also annoying. There are two very visible seams. It’s awkwardly shaped for both g-spotting and holding. It’s definitely one of those “maybe they’ll be distracted by its looks” type of deals.

4 Comments

Categories: Dildos, Reviews

Beyond #1

March 12th, 2010

Beyond 1 G-spot Vibrator

Beyond 1 G-spot Vibrator
N/A from

This is an archived review of a discontinued product.

If this G-spot vibrator looks familiar, it’s probably because it was designed akin to Ophoria’s Beyond 3 dildo except, where the dildo has an “S” shape with a loop at the base for maneuverability (or inserting a bullet), the vibrator has a straighter base that houses the batteries. Otherwise, both toys share an enlarged and rounded head intended to stimulate the G-spot. They are both quality made, out of silicone (although the Beyond 1 cannot be boiled to sterilize because of the mechanical parts) and have three soft ridges on the shaft for extra stimulation. However, the Beyond 1 has a pretty silver band separating the shaft and battery cap; it contracts nicely with the silicone (mine is black). Beyond 1 is also shorter with a total length of 7.5″ and an insertable length of, offering about 6.5″ for insertion.

As this is my first Ophoria toy, I do not know about other products, but the presentation was nice. Some might use the box for storage, but I prefer the pouch. It is black, extremely soft, and not linty – perhaps microfiber. It’s also unique in that the storage pouch does not have one open end that cinches. Indeed, it is more like an envelope and the toy slips in lengthwise. Then, the whole thing is tied up with ribbon.

The silicone of the Beyond 1 is definitely more firm than it is soft. Most of the shaft seems to be silicone-covered plastic without give. The head is also a thick silicone, which is firm as well, but the area right below the head (near the three ridges) is thinner and not covered with plastic, so it can be bent a bit. The silicone of this vibrator is smooth and velvety but will pick up lint if it is not in its pouch. The silver band next to the battery cap is painted plastic while the cap itself is plastic with a softer power button.

Battery installation is easy, and the Beyond 1 actually comes with the required 2 AAA batteries. That is always a nice touch. The directions for batteries are engraved into the plastic of the toy for easy reference, and the cap itself slides and locks into place. Beware that this toy is not waterproof and take care when cleaning.

The Beyond 1 G-spot vibrator is incredibly easy to use, with one button to power it on, off, and toggle through modes – of which there are 9. Although there is only one button, the toy can be turned off at any time by holding it down for a few seconds. This is preferable to having to cycle through all the modes but I would prefer an instant off because you still do have to wait. I find it’s actually quicker to just pull out the batteries (although I doubt that is healthy for the life of the toy).

The nine modes of vibration include a low, medium and high steady vibration and six other pulsation and escalation settings. While these settings are interesting, many of them are quite similar and the Beyond 1 would not be less of a toy without them; indeed, I find nine settings to be just a bit of overkill these days.

The vibrations are not incredibly high-pitched but do lack the depth that I really love. Yet, despite this, I found the Beyond 1 to perform well. My G-spot is pretty sensitive to vibrations, and squirting was easy – once I got the toy inserted. Although the shaft of the Beyond 1 is not giant (it has a 1.5″ diameter) and the shaft is fairly slim, the difference in size between the head and shaft of the toy is pretty drastic and can make insertion difficult or even painful, especially given the unique design of the head of the toy. Even when I was well lubricated (water based only) and aroused, I had some difficulty. It was definitely easier for me to use Beyond 1 after playing with other insertables. I imagine this will prevent the Beyond 1 from being comfortable or enjoyable to use for some people because of their builds and would definitely not recommend it to a sex toy newbie.

Honestly, I have used the Beyond 1 for less for G-spot play than I have externally which might seem odd but given my preference for broader, rounded surfaces, the Beyond 1 really fit the bill. I can move it against myself in such a way that reminds me of a penis rubbing on my clit to produce some nice orgasms. Because my G-spot is fairly shallow, I can almost use the Beyond 1 as a dual stimulator, inserting just more than the head, but it’s not ideal.

While I am pleasantly surprised by the versatility of this vibrator, I do have some less-than-thrilling thoughts. After my first use (and second wash), the Beyond 1 G-spot vibrator has begun to rattle during use. It still works fine, and sometimes I can’t even notice the rattling (like when it’s under a blanket), but it is more noticeable during pulsation settings and a bit annoying. Even with the rattle, Beyond 1 is pretty quiet and couldn’t be heard through a closed door, but it’s not as silent as the phrase “whisper quiet technology” suggests.

Additionally, I could not feel the under the head during use. The toy might even be easier to maneuver without the extra texture, but that is just an educated guess on my part. On a semi-related note, some folks experienced painful issues with seams on other Ophoria toys, including the Beyond 3 dildo. Still, while the seams are visible to the eye and tactile to the fingers, they were not noticeable in use.

I do really like Ophoria’s Beyond 1 G-spot vibrator. I usually do not find G-spot vibrators to be very versatile, and this may be the first one that can be used internally and externally for me, so I will definitely keep it handy.

5 Comments

Categories: Reviews, Vibrators

Make love to your long distance lover online

Ophoria K-balls #10

May 29th, 2009

Ophoria K-balls
N/A from

These Kegel exercisers remain in my top three nearly a decade later. Read on to find out more.

I feel it would be appropriate were this review accompanied by Tom Cruise singing “goodness, gracious, great balls of fire”. All silliness aside, Ophoria’s Smooth K-Balls are pretty great even if they’re not flaming (and that actually might be for the best). And now I can say I have balls.

Ophoria packaged the K-balls in a sleek pink and white box with some feminine details. It’s very modern and looks like a department store package so I could imagine it being sold retail in Younkers or something (is that reference too geographic? You could replace that with Macy’s). There’s a plastic window in front so you can see the pair of pink vaginal exercisers in all their glory. The balls themselves are not quite the same shade of pink as on the box; I think the box is a little prettier and the balls almost seem dull sometimes but it doesn’t detract from their use even if it sort of offends my sense of aesthetics.

Ophoria didn’t include a lot of information with their K-balls and they could expand on that. The box lets us know they’re 1000% silicone, non-porous, can be cleaned with soap and water and boasts of the strong stimulation and ergonomic design. The included instructions also serve as a product catalog. There are some generic instructions about not using any toys which appear broken, not submerging them or using them while menstruating. There are some good tips about how sex toys can transmit STDs and making sure to clean all crevices but not using brushes or abrasive solutions. There’s nothing in the way of how to get the best use out of this specific product.

So it might be a good thing that I’ve experienced kegel balls a time or two. In fact, you may remember my review of the Luna Beads and, to be honest, I wasn’t blown away. They weren’t very stimulating and I thought the whole concept of 2 weighted balls was hokey. Luckily, the K-balls are much more stimulating. In fact, I’d say I can even feel more movement from the inner balls – or “shakers” as the package calls them – in hand. I think the shakers might be a bit smaller but since the exterior is opaque, I don’t know for sure. The balls themselves are the same size at the Luna Beads, with a diameter of 1 3/8″ but the K-balls are slightly longer.

Speaking of the exterior, the pink K-balls have white-ish circle and triangle shapes. These shapes seem to be raised slightly but are only for looks as my vagina certainly can’t feel them. The hard silicone isn’t exactly smooth and has that typical, silicone texture which may make for more friction than smooth plastic but insertion was pretty easy with a little water-based lube. I find the second ball is always a little more difficult because I have to rely on the connecting material, which is flexible, to push up the higher ball. Once inserted, the balls don’t remain straight either; they sort of bunch up next to each other but it’s not uncomfortable (the lower ball will pop out, however, if they’re not situated correctly).

In fact, it’s the pleasurable stimulation I get from the K-balls which earns them a much higher rating than the Luna Beads. After initial insertion, the K-balls seem to rest directly against my G-spot and stimulate arousal. Since few toys have successfully and consistently stimulated my G-spot, this is quite the feat! I’m not sure if it’s the “vibration” of the inner balls, which I can feel (and even hear sometimes) or the exterior of the balls rubbing against my sensitive spots but the first minutes after insertion are always pleasurable.

I can definitely feel the “vibration”, too. I have a habit of doing this silly sort of ass-shaking move to make the K-balls vibrate (which I’m sure my husband would enjoy). This actually made me think that it might be a good idea to pop these in before going dancing! These ease of popping these in before any activity or even if you have nothing planned is appealing. And, even if the K-balls don’t strengthen my muscles, they feel good and being able to feel the vibration reminds me to do my Kegels here and there. I tend to pop them in before taking walks and do a couple squeezes while waiting to cross the street or in line at the store. But if you want to be more proactive about your muscle strengthening, you can always clench around one or both balls, while tugging on the string with a finger.

I can’t say for sure if my muscles are any stronger. I think that’s easier to tell with a partner – which I don’t have right now. I can say that I have used these balls, in a few short weeks, more than I’ve used the Luna Beads in the months I’ve had them. Both sets of vaginal balls made me more aware of my vagina but the K-balls also makes me feel good which is that much more incentive to use them.

After you’re done, you can easily remove the K-balls with the silicone-coated string with connects to the “lower” ball. Actually, the lower ball is slightly pointed at the bottom so it’s not a complete “ball”. Unlike the Luna Beads, the K-balls don’t tend to get all suction-stuck in my pussy and the coated string doesn’t cut into my finger. Unfortunately, that is a tiny crack in the coating of the string on my balls. I noticed it after using because the crack is so tiny so it’s possible that I somehow caused it or that it came this way and I just didn’t notice. Fortunately, it hasn’t grown any and I’m still comfortable using the K-balls.

After use, K-balls are easy to wash with soap and water. Silicone is dishwasher safe but I’m not entirely sure about the K-balls. The box says they’re splash proof but I don’t see why they couldn’t be fully submerged as they lack mechanical parts. The K-balls are also easy to dry and don’t seem to pick up lint. I do wish they came with a storage pouch – I stole the one that came with my Luna Beads to keep them all nice and cozy and protected from other toys.

In the end, I was much more impressed by Ophoria’s K-balls than other vaginal balls I’ve tried. These high-quality exercisers are not only easy to use but are actually a fun and pleasurable way to raise body awareness and, hopefully, strengthen PC muscles. With a little more information provided and a storage pouch, I’d say the K-balls are an A+.

8 Comments

Categories: Reviews, Sexual Health and Beauty

Image © MisterUnlucky; used with permission.