Below you’ll find all of the sex toy reviews I’ve written at Of Sex and Love. Find my opinions on vibrators, dildos, media (sex education books, porn, DVDs and erotica), bondage and BDSM gear, lingerie, anal toys, lube, massage products, and more!
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The Boss Naked
N/A
from
This is an archived review of a discontinued toy.
..and you can be sure I’ve never had reason to say that before, until now. Unfortunately, the Boss vibrator has some of the same issues as real bosses. Like, there are a couple of different versions, which leads to some confusion. Which is the real boss? Who do I actually report to? I mean, there’s the new Boss Lady in town with her pink power suit. But there are also a couple more bosses who demand your attention. The original boss, even though his position seems to have been liquidated, can still be found stuck in his old-fashioned ways. He seems to be making his presence known, complete with dial-style controls. Finally, some folks like myself are familiar with a sort of transitional Boss. You could say that while he looks more like the old Boss (colour), he acts more like the new one (control type). While some people prefer the old boss, he has been giving his pink slip and the Boss Lady is here to stay.
Like any employer, sometimes the Boss just doesn’t mesh with some folks. There seem to be a lot of issues revolving around opening the battery compartment on both styles. The battery cap pops off from the boss with sort of a partial twist which can be confusing. Furthermore, there have been reports of the Boss not completing all his duties fully or at all. He has failed to vibrate and/or pulsate for some unless they fidget with the battery pack or controls (and sometimes that doesn’t even help) but I think a boss should just do his job. Luckily for me, mine did.
If you’re considering the Boss to get the job done, you’ll notice he comes well-dressed for the job. With his clean lines, defined head and velvety matte texture (which might mean using an extra drop or two of water-based lube), it’s hard to not be drawn to the boss. The Boss has a gentle curve and substantial girth (1-3/5”) so heads up, size queens. With an insertable length of just under 7″, the Boss knows how to dress for success and his overall appearance lured me into cooperation.
But it was his performance that got the best review! Although not the largest toy I own, The Boss feels incredibly filling, even bigger than he is. The silicone is firm enough for thrusting but soft enough that he feels as though he’s conforming to me especially. One of the last toys I tried, while large, never felt filling. If there is one area in which the Boss excels, this is it! Were I to search for the perfect size and shape of cock, I would walk down the line up of cock with The Boss in my hand, comparing, and I cannot help but wonder if anything or anything will compare. I definitely think the texture and shape of the Boss give the impression of a toy bigger than the Boss is but, hey, sometimes you have to know when to fool people into thinking you’re more than you are.
Billed as the perfect G-spot vibe, I didn’t find that he quite hit mine right during solo play but don’t doubt his firmness would make him the right man for the job if someone could intervene for me (damn my short arms). Yet, the Boss isn’t a man so hard you need to be afraid – he has a sensitive side. The Boss is definitely soft and flexible. The top half of the shaft is pure, flexible silicone, while the motor is located toward the middle of the shaft, on the bottom half.
Using the Boss’s flexibility to my advantage has turned this into the perfect dual-stimulation toy. I know he doesn’t look like much of a double-tasker, but being able to bend him upward so that the little clitoral nub makes contact is amazing. Otherwise, I don’t think that little clitoral nub will do much of anything; in fact, that was even the thought I had about it right out of the package. While I’ve used the Boss to get off with the head on my clit, bending him has definitely provided the best orgasms. I find that I can sometimes get into such a rhythm that thrusting him provides stimulation against both my G-spot (the thrusting causes the vibe to curve back in a way it otherwise wouldn’t) and clit, in sequence.
I’m glad, for once, that The Boss proved me wrong. He has proved to be a much harder worker and easier to work with than I would have originally guessed. For instance, I thought he had some control issues, in the beginning. It was difficult to push his buttons to access the multiple levels of vibration and pulsation. My small hands struggled. However, because my grip on the toy was actually reversed when in use, I found the buttons easier to use this way and was soon provided with 7 or so pleasing levels of vibration (provided by 4 AAA batteries). While not the strongest toy in my collection (that pleasure goes to the Miracle Massager), the boss was not disappointing, either, and his 3 levels of pulsation were not the wimpy kind – I definitely felt them deep within. All the while, the Boss used only a suitable indoor voice and you’d never know he was just a room over. I would have to say, however, that the Boss does not perform consistently. The vibes were much stronger near the clitoral bump than the head of the shaft.
Of course, I’m a critical person and I couldn’t help but notice a specific area where the Boss’s traits were over-exaggerated a bit. Rumors about the Boss say that he is good at giving an extra boost to get the job done when it’s really getting down to the line. I was not impressed by the turbo boost button at the end of the vibe. Essentially, it seems like an extra level of steady vibration, which you can press when orgasm is near, to set you over the edge. I didn’t find the boost to be that powerful, and the fact that you need to hold it down also hampers the effect. It would make more sense if, say, I could press the boost button once and get a few seconds of extra power without needing to hold it.
Nevertheless, there are a few understated qualities of the boss that make him a pleasure to work with. He’s not afraid to get his hands wet, which makes him perfect for use in the shower and easy to clean.
If you can’t tell yet, I’ve really gotten used to working with the Boss and I look forward to our teamwork in the future.
Pink Pussy Pump
$37.69
from Store.OfSexAndLove.com
Although I was initially a bit put off by the strange looks of the Pink Pussy Pump, I was soon pleasantly surprised by the unique sensations provided by an actually effective suction system.
At first, I was taken aback by the size of the suction cup. I was expecting something a little smaller, for focus on clitoral suction. Rather, the cup provides suction stimulation to the entire vulva – or pussy – region. Furthermore, the cup is made of a hard pink plastic, which did prove to get the job done, but also threw me off. The hard plastic seemed to be a bit institutional or medicinal – at least, as medicinal as pink plastic can be. There’s not much to the rest of the apparatus: just a springy hose and a rubber, bulb-shaped pump. Overall, this is not a sexy looking sex toy and that was disappointing to my sense of aesthetic. Luckily, a toy does not need to be sexy itself to work well.
The pussy pump, which comes in a fairly cute, 70s inspired pink and purple box, fits easily over my lips. I have to agree that it is ergonomically correct; the edges of the cup are slightly curved instead of flat. Although the cup isn’t exactly small, it was small enough to move higher or lower and I think it would be wearable during sex as long as it’s not too rough or the cup isn’t bumped. I was able to insert a rather large toy and thrust without dislodging the cup.
Suction-wise, I was impressed. The Pinky Pussy Pump provided much more suction than the last flimsy toy I tried. I applied it to a bare thigh first, just to experiment, and the suction on the first pump was amazing. The increase in successive pumps was also impressive, and the effect on my skin was visible. Applied to my vulva, I felt a satisfying pressure/tug on the general area, which, while including my clit, wasn’t focused on it.
At first, my squeezes on the bulb pump, which is textured and easy to grip, were rather large, but I was able to experiment a bit, and I could easily adjust the level of pressure in fairly small increments. If the pressure is too much, you need to take off the pump quickly or you’re simply done playing, there is an easy to use quick-release button between the hose and pump. I found the woosh of air to my pussy to feel really exciting. I wasn’t able to release the pressure in increments as small as I could increase it but, with focus, I could release pressure in several small increments.
While this sensation alone wasn’t enough to get me off. It was quite arousing and would be a nice companion during sex or masturbation. I think sex would work a little better because the cup did get in the way a bit with toy use. The toy also aims to increase the size of your lips but, honestly, I didn’t really notice. However, I wasn’t as concerned because it was pleasurable.
Despite the fact that the suction was impressive, it was fairly easy to break the seal by slipping a finger under one edge of simply pulling the cup off my skin (and, y’know, when my cat jumped on me LOL). Neither of these things hurt, either. It also didn’t tug on any of my hair but it’s fairly short right now (maybe 1/2″).
One of the features of the Pink Pussy Pump is that you can remove the hose and pump without loosing suction. I’m not sure why anyone would do this. I wasn’t eager to do jumping jacks or the dishes or anything so I don’t see the need. Still, I tried it out, and I was able to successfully remove the house where it connects via a metal fastener type thing. This is also how I disconnected the hose to wash the cup before and after use. Without the hose, the cup is simply an easy-to-clean, hard plastic piece.
I found the Pink Pussy Pump to be more stimulating than I thought it would be and can see it being used during partner or solo play. The stretchy hose was adequate length for me to use on myself and a partner could easily hold the reins as well, adding another aspect to your play. I would recommend this to anyone looking for suction in their sex lives.
Tantus now makes a Super Soft version of the Goliath.
Tantus is a brand many people love but which never much appealed to me because so many of its products are for harness use. Although harness compatible dildos can absolutely be used harness-free, I found many of the designs by Tantus to be a little, well, boring and too smooth. On the other hand, many of the dildos have an overabundance of ridges, ripples and bulges, which don’t work very well for hard and fast thrusting. It really takes a particular dildo to please me, texture and shape are of utmost importance and since I haven’t mastered the art of G-spot orgasm, I usually stick to sex toys which stimulate my clit. However, I was interested in trying some of their products when PinkCherry offered, and browsed through their collection. I wasn’t looking for the super smooth, Silk trio of dildos and the Echo, while beautiful, seemed like a bit too much for me. I wound up choosing the Goliath .
With its metallic purple shine and lifelike veins and contoured head, Tantus has produced a pretty good-looking dildo. Luckily, its unrealistic colour balanced off its more realistic shape because I don’t like my dildos to be too true to life. Like other Tantus products, this dildo is 100% silicone (advertised as “100% ultra-premium platinum silicone” on the package) which means no harmful chemicals (promising you a rash and irritation-free experience, unlike mine with Sil-A-Gel))or porousness and you can thoroughly clean Goliath by boiling or bleaching but, since I don’t plan on sharing or using this dildo anally, warm water and soap will suffice. The packaging claims that “with minimal care, Tantus Toys can last a lifetime”; because they can be sterilized, you can even donate them to friends should they outlive your need or, dare I say, will them to your children. 😉
If you hadn’t guessed already by the name, Goliath’s stature is anything but small. Weighing in at 7 1/2″ in length and width with a girth at 5 1/2″, it’s not a toy for beginners or those who like things thin. And, after trying it out, I would also say it’s not a toy for those who like their insertables soft. The silicone material is rather rigid and while it doesn’t feel as hard in my hand (I can squeeze a bit and bend the shaft), once nestled inside my pussy it feels rather unyielding. Coupled with its size, it provided an experience more uncomfortable than I had bargained for.
Of course, as with any toy of such a significant size, lube is a must. Water-based lubes are safe with any material and higher quality silicone lubes may always work. Even with lube, I found there was initial resistance when I inserted Goliath. After passing my pubic bone, it became easier but it seemed like even though I wasn’t inserting much of the dildo, it quickly assaulted my cervix. Perhaps the thickness of the shaft makes Goliath seem shorter than it is but I felt like I could insert less than I usually can with my toys. Maybe it’s just perception or it could be that there seems to be a bit more leeway with thinner toys and cocks but it just didn’t feel like this dildo was made for my body, at least for thrusting. However, I did enjoy the sensation of having this dildo inside while focusing on clitoral stimulation. I always enjoy the way it feels when my muscles contract in orgasm around an object.
Goliath’s veins were discernible but not overly so. I didn’t really feel either way about them. The same could be said for the provided bullet which turns this into a vibrating dildo (I hate the term LOL). The one speed, silver bullet is pretty standard size, battery (3, watch style) powered and operates with a push button on the end. For its size, the vibrations are decent but the definitely become more muted once inserted into the dildo. I could barely feel them at the tip; although, the vibrations were more easily felt at the base.
Overall, the bullet seemed much cheaper than the toy. I’m sure they are better bullets. More than once, the vibration didn’t seem to want to work correctly because the bullet is so fickle. Additionally, I had a difficult time inserting and removing the bullet, which comes separately from the dildo. The package advises using lube, which I had to do in order to insert it. Insertion without lube meant the bullet barely went in. However, despite the fact that I applied lube, I had one hell of a time removing the bullet. First, the cap popped off, then it started randomly vibrating and after about 10 minutes of wrestlin’ with it, I finally pulled the bullet loose.
I think a much better use of the hole is the Tantus suction cup which allows you to play with your toys on any flat surface. At first, I noticed that the smooth bottom of Goliath has a bit of suction, but it’s not enough to secure it to a surface.
In the end, I was left a well-made, high-quality dildo and I expect it to last no less than a lifetime (even if the bullet was disappointing); however, the combination of size and stiff silicone left me wanting, well, a little less. I’m sure that some will love the Goliath, and there’s probably a Tantus dildo that will work well for me, but the search doesn’t end here.
Venus Penis
N/A
from
This is an archived review of a discontinued product. You can buy this similar product, but I’m not sure why you’d want to.
Dear California Exotic Novelties,
Size matters. I’m not sure if you missed the memo or if you’re so sure of yourself that you think the rules don’t apply to you but they do. Let me repeat it: size matters. No, it’s not the only thing that matters. So do quality, forethought, creativity and function, all of which you utterly failed to bring to the table when you decided to make yet another pitiful “hands free” vibrator: the Venus Penis. I know that out of the hundreds or thousands of sex toys you will make, some of them are destined to succeed but is that good enough reason for the rest of them to be so horrid? In short, California Exotic, your toy sucks. You suck.
For starters – and let’s kick it off with the big one – I only chose the Venus Penis after having such a disappointing time with my first (and last, until now) strap on vibrator because it has a penis. At least, I thought it did. Your pictures and packaging make it seem mysteriously larger than it actually is. It almost looks like a nice, meaty cock will well defined head. What it actually is, is a finger which has mutated with the head of a cock. It might be a meaty finger, but it’s not much when it comes to insertion. If any of you have vaginas, stick your thumb in it. Wow! See what that does?
Absolutely nothing!
On the topic of size, I have a bone to pick with toy manufacturers who assume that the vagina, clit and anus are all within some 3″ diameter. They’re not. Really. Add an inch or 2 or, hell, even 4 for good measure and then the “erotic clitoral” stimulator and “superior anal” stimulator might reach their target. I mean, come on, can you really call something that doesn’t touch anything superior? I think not.
On a semi-related note, I guess you don’t like fleshy girls. My mons and labia are pretty prominent, which means if I even want clit stimulation, I have to push my lips aside and hold the toy against me. So much for hands-free, huh? Really, all you need to do is make the clit stimulator longer and soft enough so I can adjust it to where I need it.
And while we’re on the subject of inferiority (we are, aren’t we?), let’s talk about the material. Jelly? Really? It smells out of the box and, you’re lucky, because many folks won’t even touch the stuff anymore, but I’m not so picky. And, I’m not sure how you did it, but the jelly is actually rather stiff. The wings kept poking my poor thighs uncomfortably. What gives? (Haha! Nothing, because if the toy had give, it wouldn’t hurt). And the straps? Cheap elastic, which, while soft and shouldn’t hurt, began to chafe after a while.
So where were we? Creativity? Check – I mean, not really. I liked the idea of overall external stimulation combined with internal vibration so I think you tried to do something a little more original, here, but failed. That’s because you lack my next point: forethought. I probably think more than most people and it doesn’t always do me any good but your lack of thought, period, does me no good. I mean why put the penis in the middle of the butterfly’s tummy when the toy is designed to sit forward, not really under you? This means the already-crappy penis is inserted at an awkward, yes even painful, angle. Maybe that’s why you made it so short? You knew we’d be feeling it but did you count on us saying “Ouch!”?
It also doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that the thigh and waist strap set up just doesn’t work. The entire time I had this thing on (although I must commend you for making this wearable by a large variety of sizes), the toy pulled up and to the front instead of where I wanted it to sit, y’know, against my clit! I think that straps which mimic the shape of a bikini or even like a G-string would make more sense. Plus, the placement made sitting uncomfortable. I’m pretty sure the position the woman is, on the package, is the only feasible position and, even doing that, the anal stimulator kept stabbing at my perineum.
Furthermore, when is someone going to make detachable straps so we can toss them in the washer? Oh, wait, the customer would never know how to put them back on and it’s not our fault. It’s because the setup is ridiculously complicated (remember when I suggested you mimic a well-known set up like panties? That might come in handy, now). I mean, if we could take off the straps without fearing we’d never get them back on correctly, we might use the toy a lot more because cleaning would be so much easier.
Well, maybe. Except for the part where a wire comes out of the toy through a hole in the belly, near the front. I understand it needs to connect to the control pack somehow (standard, CE dial-style controls), but not only does it make cleaning harder than it should be (and you can certainly rule out waterproof capabilities) but it’s kind of weird for the wire to come out from between my lips.
What we’re left with here is function. I would expect strong vibes from a toy powered by 2AA batteries. This wasn’t really the case. However, I did find that I was left with a pleasant tingle and, with a lot of holding the toy and grinding against it, I did get off. Still, I have toys that can do this better, easier, and faster, like my Laya Spot, and if that was all I wanted from this toy, I wouldn’t have purchased it. I got absolutely nothing from the penis on this toy at best, when it wasn’t being painfully mediocre, literally.
You might be wondering now if there was anything I did like. Yes, I liked the colour of this. It’s a neat dark fuchsia. It’s just too bad the shape of the toy isn’t aesthetically appealing; otherwise, I might just consider not throwing it away.
Also, the awkward pose of the “model” on the packaging makes me smile. I mean, who wouldn’t? The fake breast groping and the forced smile are just so strange. I can’t help but laugh. Thanks for that, California Exotic Novelties, and not much else.
Sincerely,
Me
Pink Magnificent Dildo
This is an archived review of a discontinued toy.
There are days when everything seems to go right. Or so I hear. I cannot specifically recall having one. However, I do recall a specific masturbation session which went very well. There I was, with a pink glass dildo and some Wet Naturals lube. I wasn’t thinking about the dildo’s propensity to hold heat or the lack thereof (although it is a very nice feature of glass) as it warmed to my body temperature. I had better things to think about than the fact that I could sterilize it, if I wanted, by boiling it or popping it in the dishwasher (top shelf, no soap). No, I was focused on the feeling of the swirled shaft sliding in and out of my body, the smooth, engorged head probing deep inside (with a 3 3/4 ” girth at the shaft, this dildo isn’t like a meaty cock, but the texture more than makes up for it).
My mind wasn’t visualizing the snake-like appearance of the shaft (you can see the swirling on the opposite side of the dildo, which makes it seem crisscrossed, like scales). Perhaps the magnificent appearance is where its name comes from (the Pink Magnificent). I was relieved because the last swirled dildo I had used was actually a little uncomfortable, but the tightly wrapped, spiral texture extends the full length (7.5″, 7″ of which are insertable) of this glass dildo. While I could easily feel the texture, the swirls were neither so high nor wide that they caused discomfort.
What I felt, instead, was increasing pleasure. I soon recognized my body’s own response to a toy that is not only well made but well shaped; the lube was no longer the reason I was wet and growing wetter by the moment. Even realizing this caused me greater satisfaction. It’s not every day that internal stimulation alone does so much for me. In fact, sex does not consistently produce such a result, so that a dildo could do so on its first try was impressive. Perhaps this is why it’s called the Pink Magnificent.
During all of this, I didn’t consider how the flat base of this dildo made it anal-safe (although I might have thought it made a good handle). After all, I was enjoying it vaginally. I wasn’t considering the affordability (Don Wand’s glass toys cost just a fraction of the price of Pyrex glass dildos) or the thought that went into the toy (Don Wands provides a bulky, pillow bag for storage and protection as well as samples of Wet lube with their products) or its non-porous nature (good for folks like me who only like to wash up with soap and water). I simply enjoyed the feeling of a glass dildo, larger than the rest of my collection, gracing my sex.
As arousal grew, I knew I would have to switch tactics. I would have to focus on clitoral stimulation in order to cum. The dildo slid easily from between my lips and was soon rubbing smoothly over my vulva, against my clit. Applying pressure, which is easy to do with such a hefty tool, soon brought forth an orgasm or two (maybe more, who’s counting?).
As sex faded from my mind, I was able to easily wash the Pink Magifnicent with soap and water, then let it dry before slipping it back into its storage pouch. I did take the time to consider how much easier it is to dry glass without having to worry about the smooth material picking up lint; it’s also why using glass requires little to no lube (however, I would always use a little lube with this dildo but I can choose silicone or water-based to suit my mood).
I put the Pink Magnificent aside for a few days until I could return to it in a rational, not enamored, state of mind. Currently, I have a few thoughts (almost all positive). The Pink Magnificent is a sturdy, well-made dildo, the color and texture of which give it a beautiful exterior. It feels unique and satisfying internally, and the round, tapered head works well for clitoral play. Vaginal or anal play are both ideal, and because it can be sterilized, this glass dildo is safe for both.
Frequent soap-and-water cleaning will more than suffice if you don’t plan to share it between holes or partners. However, I noticed that creases between the swirls on this toy are a little more difficult to clean than other glass dildos I own. I would advise cleaning with a small brush or perhaps just a Q-tip to make sure the crevices are cleaned. Although I thought I had cleaned thoroughly with just my hands, I noticed the dildo retained some dirt and will have to keep this in mind for the future.
Nevertheless, Don Wands has produced a dildo that performs very admirably with their Pink Magnificent. Form and function are both tops here, and the price is very reasonable.
X: The Erotic Treasury
$18.92
from Amazon
There is usually a book or two sitting on my nightstand and, up until now, they have been inconspicuous. Long novels whose covers are adorned with people on horses and flaming swords are a favorite (I look forward to rereading Weis and Hickman’s Death Gate Series). I have also enjoyed Absolute Sandman, which includes some impressive-looking books by Gaiman (rest assured that his writing rivals, if not surpasses, the look of these tomes!); so I am no stranger to beautiful books. And books are no stranger to my bedroom, even erotic ones. But I’ve never had a book quite like X: The Erotic Treasury, grace my nightstand before. Chances are, neither have you.
On the surface, X shares some characteristics of other books I’ve turned to before bed. Like the Ultimate Sandman, it is hardcover and slip-cased, a reprinting of previously published works. Like 5 Minute Erotica, it is a volume of quality erotic writings from two dozen authors, and it will most certainly turn you on. But the fact that it is like both of those books really makes it something else entirely. I don’t think anyone in the business of producing racy reading material has ever gone this route. I think this gives both the editor (Susie Bright) and the publisher (Chronicle Books) an edge over the competition. Quite simply, they did it first.
What is it that they did, exactly? They published a book of the best of the best, with a sexual twist. Susie Bright compiled two dozen stories, many of which were previously published in collections like Best American Erotica or Best Women’s Erotica, to tease and please us. With over 300 pages of erotic content, there is simply a lot more to this collection than others I have written. There’s really not much of a comparison.
On top of the quality stories, the powers that be also decided to make X a book that was also pleasing to the eyes. Slightly larger than most erotica, this hardcover book is encased in red fabric featuring a floral-esque motif in a not-quite-black pattern. The front and back covers are bare, and I’ve opened the book upside down a time or two, but this is not something about which I am overly concerned. On the spine of the book, you will find the name of both the editor and anthology in a very complimentary gold tone. The book fits comfortably in a slipcase that features the same floral design, with colors switched (the not-quite-black is more predominant). On the front of the slipcase, the letter X has been cut so the cover of the book itself will show through. It’s really quite impressive.
Ms. Bright did a wonderful job editing – I noticed no typos or other publishing errors – as well as picking the stories/authors to publish. The caliber of writing in this book is extremely high. It makes me ashamed when I think my writing is any good. The pieces showcased in X are by talented, articulate wordsmiths who are not afraid to express themselves. You can start from the beginning or end or anywhere in between and find yourself immersed in great storytelling.
The stories are of varying subjects, some of which may be considered taboo. They are not your run-of-the-mill erotica written by a bored housewife; they are each truly unique stories. Some are scenarios more creative than my fantasies will ever be, while others are the result of creative minds, skillfully retelling stories, familiar to us all, in ways that seem refreshed. If I have any criticisms of X, is it not about the quality of the stories?
As a testament to the quality of these pieces, I can tell you that I found myself being aroused, more than once, by situations that I do not necessarily consider erotic because the writer is simply that good. This is the case with Michael Dorsey, whose story “Milk” revolves around a Ukrainian engineer living in Russia, following a harsh winter when milk is in high demand. After searching the entire day for the elusive liquid to sate his thirst. He finds his salvation close to home and suckles from a mother’s breast. I have never been a fan of this scenario. Even as I write, I do not like it. Yet, when I read it, Mr. Dorsey’s words turned me on.
Of course, there were plenty of scenes that are more typically arousing for me and proved to be in this book. One piece, “The Man Who Are Women,” chronicles a night of drunken debauchery in which a young man accepts a dare to perform oral on random women while blindfolded. Oral sex is always a winner for me, and this story was no exception.
I also enjoyed Peggy Munson’s “Fairgrounds,” which touched on disability and gender play, as well as “Red Light, Green Light” by Shanna Germain, whose words paint a picture of women partaking in traditional activities in Amsterdam’s red light district (with a twist, of course).
Of course, I didn’t expect to like every story in this book. I found some pieces sexual but personally sexy. I think the stories I didn’t love illustrate quite well what I see as the biggest faults of this collection. First, unlike 5 Minute Erotica, these pieces are not necessarily short. Some are short (for better or worse), but most are longer. This isn’t a problem if I like the content or at least the style of writing, but a long piece that I do not like, as compared to a short one, seems that much worse. Even pieces that contained arousing parts sometimes took too long to get to the “good stuff” for my taste. I suppose I just like my erotica quick and to the point.
Secondly, because these are simply outstanding pieces, some of them simply are not erotic to me. I followed some of them with interest because the storyteller was gifted and the story itself was interesting, but I thought to myself, more than once, “Well, it’s good, but it’s not turning me on.” This was the case with a futuristic story about some sort of cyborg who got off to computerized women in the form of software (“The Portable Girlfriend”). Another story involved the coming of age of a man who has spent his life with a pair of women who embodied every teenager boy’s fantasy (think classic cheerleader), after being granted a wish (“Wish Girls”). I liked the story and was interested in what happened to the main character. Yet, it was written in such a way that something I would normally find erotic just wasn’t.
The high-quality writing contained within these pages sometimes seems to lack the down-and-dirty sexuality of most erotica. However, these common ideas can be the most arousing. Occasionally, I would find myself wondering if high-quality writing and erotica were not mutually exclusive. It seemed like some of the authors preferred hinting at the sex or writing a story that involved sex but was not necessarily about it. I know this is not always the case, as X: The Erotic Treasury contained many well-written pieces that did involve blatant sexuality, yet others made me wonder why they were chosen with this book.
I suppose it must take just as skillful a writer to take something I would generally consider erotic and turn it into something simply interesting, as it does to take the mundane or anti-erotic and make it arousing. Rest assured, all of the authors who have had work included in X: The Erotic Treasury have written pieces worth reading (as is this collection worth perusing). I’m just not sure all of them belong in an anthology of erotica.
Trojan vibrating touch finger vibe
$11.75
from Amazon
I have now used vibrating products from both the big names in condoms – Trojan and Durex – and while these products seem to be great for beginners, those companies will need to try harder if they want to make the giants like California Exotic run for their money.
For starters, Trojan needs to work on the commercial for its new finger vibe. If you ever tune into Oxygen late at night, then you’ve probably seen the two young women giggling about that new toy from Trojan and whispering to each other what it does. Even though the commercial wants us to believe that it’s okay to be curious about these things (after all, the older woman behind them has one, too!), we can only talk about them while laughing nervously. It seems to me, the commercial would be more effective if the women were talking calmly and collectedly about this product. Really, that’s neither here or there, but part of my motivation for trying out this finger vibe was because I hate the commercial so damned much. LOL
So once you get past the nervousness and purchase this toy, you’ll be staring at a purple box exactly like Trojan’s Her Pleasure line of condoms because the Vibrating Touch is part of it. When I opened my mail, I was actually confused as to why I was receiving condoms before I saw “Vibrating Touch.” I wouldn’t have minded if Trojan made the package a little classier (like Durex does with its Play toys) but am willing to look past this. Like most condom companies, Trojan provided a condom with their toy (Her Pleasure), and while I don’t need it, I could always use it with a questionable toy.
The finger vibe itself is in a plastic/foil bag. Inside the package is also a small velvet, drawstring pouch for storage. This looks exactly like small jewelry pouches, so if someone ever finds your Vibrating Touch finger vibe while it’s in the bag, they probably won’t think twice. Keeping it on or in your nightstand or dresser would seem completely normal, and it wouldn’t be out of place in your purse or even carry-on luggage if you’re traveling. I have noticed that the drawstrings are rather long and my cats like to play with them, dragging the pouch all over my house because it’s so small.
The finger vibe itself is a squishy, purple sleeve with a loop to slip on your finger and a removable, 1-speed mini-bullet. The material of the sleeve, which the packaging does not name (but there was no rubber smell) is really soft and has little ridges along the shaft and whorls, like a fingerprint, on the tip. While these are really fun to feel against my fingers, my clit didn’t detect the ridges and whorls so easily but I think the texture was better than a smooth sleeve. The stretchy loop on top of the finger vibe fit comfortably around my finger, but I found that, during use, the position shifted up and down, just as the toy seemed to slip left to right, and sometimes it wasn’t much better than using a finger to rub myself. I think this is because I use so much pressure.
And the reason I use so much pressure is because the bullet isn’t all that strong. It’s not bad for its size, but it’s definitely more of a gentle touch. I think this would be great for beginners, but I’ve used some strong vibrators and really need something more now. Unlike similar toys, this bullet here is reusable, so you don’t have to throw it away after 30 minutes of use; however, you will need to change the batteries after 30 minutes. Unfortunately, it is powered by 2 tiny battery sizes, which I have never before encountered, called LR41. I accidentally dropped one when opening the bullet, and these could easily be lost, so be careful when switching batteries.
As I mentioned, the bullet is removable, which means you can use the sleeve on your finger alone if you want a really light touch. You could possibly fit a similar-sized bullet in the sleeve, but it is rather small. Or, if you just wanted to use the bullet alone, there is that option. For thorough cleaning, I like this because the bullet is not waterproof; however, it looks waterproof, and I washed the whole thing without problems. It’s also extremely easy to remove and replace the bullet.
The on/off button on the bullet is easy to push with my thumb while on my finger. I actually preferred wearing the fingertip massager on my middle finger because it’s longer. My fingers are rather short so the massager sometimes felt a little unwieldy but not horribly so.
Because this toy is so small, you could use it almost anywhere and you can easily toss it in your purse or luggage for travel. I personally used it for a little afternoon stroll through the land of cybersex but I ultimately prefer my Laya Spot for this.
My final thoughts on this sex toy are that it’s cute and versatile, but its gentle vibrations are better for someone who is either less experienced or prefers their vibration to be really light and it’s extremely quiet.
And after 15 years? I wouldn’t recommend this to anyone who has other options available, especially because it doesn’t feel like it will stand the test of time. Fortunately, the local pharmacy and big-big stores offer that convenience by carrying products by PlusOne! It’s wild to me that this toy is still available. I feel so strongly that you can spend a little more that I almost don’t want to include a link in this review. But here. Here is it. Do yourself a favor and don’t click it.
