I guess I’m at the point in my life where people feel like it’s fine to point out that I’m single. In fact, my best friend’s mother in law recently asked me if I was dating anyone. I didn’t go into the details about the bartender. That’s rather confusing on its own. I just told her I wasn’t seeing anyone.
She went on in a judgmental way about how I had very little time left. It just rubbed me the wrong way. When people say things like that, it seems like there are all these assumptions:
- That I’m straight
- That I want kids
- That I want kids naturally
- That I want to get married again
- That I even want another relationship
All of these assumptions rub me the wrong way but it’s the idea that I haven’t thought about dating that bugs me. I’ve been on dates. I signed up with OkCupid and Plenty of Fish. I’ve thought about clubs and considered dating friends. I’ve tried looking at everyone I met as a potential love interest.
I just don’t see going on miserable dates as a fun pastime. I am not desperate enough to settle like so many people. Sure, I’d like to have more sex, but I only want that to be good sex, amazing sex. This, I will not get after some random first date. Of this I am sure.
So I’d rather be happy and alone even if I’m not living by someone else’s timeline. In fact, I’d rather be happy and alone than miserable because I’m not meeting some timeline of my own. I don’t like arbitrary goals. It’s why I have no new year’s resolutions.
And if you’re not going to take the time to get to know me, then you certainly don’t deserve any explanation or have the right to make demands of what I do with my own time, with my personal life.
I suppose it does no good to be angry with people whose worldview is so narrow that they need to box me in, too.
