Simply Sensual Candle Pomegranate

February 24th, 2011

Have you ever had one of those days where you just failed to read the fine print? This is what happened when I decided I would enjoy the “Simply Sensual Candle Pomegranate.” Except it’s not pomegranate. It’s pomegranate ginger and that doesn’t sound appealing to me at all. But, the trooper that I am, I opened up this candle tin and gave it a giant whiff.

And almost died.

The candle itself smells like chemicals and soap. Just awful. I had to make myself light it. And I did and.. it wasn’t so bad. The fruity hints of pomegranate became noticeable, if a bit light for my tastes. The ginger in this candle is hard to detect at all. It’s a very recognizable smell and it just didn’t exist. Just when I was thinking that this was maybe not a catastrophe after all, and trying to enjoy the light fruity scent, the soapy smell came back. At the point of massage, the soapy scent is at its strongest and I am at my most annoyed.

Another thing I noticed was the oil seems to be quite thick and dry feeling. I’ve used other massage candles that are quite slick but the slickness quickly dissipates with this particular brand. Once I’m done using it, I also feel as though I absolutely must wash my hands and, while they do feel soft and moisturized, I am not fond of feeling like something is caked on my hands.

Although this candle is all natural and includes ingredients such as soy, and hempseed and coconut oil, I’d prefer something with a few more chemicals as long as it improved upon my experience. One last thing I noticed is that this burns really sloppily. The wick does the cracking and peeling and curling thing so you absolutely must trim it to avoid the charred with from falling into the wax itself and further ruining your experience. I don’t know much about candle wicks but, after using this product, I think I’m much more likely to stick with higher end massage candles or products like Kama Sutra’s Oil of Love. And that’s a shame because this four-ounce candle comes in a tin that is actually much cuter than most candle tins. All the different scents feature a modern and clean label with colors specific to the scent.It just seems like the quality of massage candles in tins is really inconsistent.

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Mini Mini Mini MINI

February 21st, 2011

I can’t give the company that makes the Wanachi massagers any credit for their naming style. Otherwise, I’d be announcing a contest for something other than the Mini-Mini-Mini Wanachi. But, there you have it, the name sucks but I’m announcing this giveaway, regardless. I actually have three things to give away to one lucky winner:

I’m thinking that this tiny vibrator (it’s really about the size of a lipstick tube) and travel-sized bottle of lube are great for travel because they’re so easy to hide. So, for this contest, I simply want to hear about your experience traveling with toys. Have you done it? Did you get caught? Do you pack your toys in your luggage, carry on or sneak them on your person? Do you wonder what people will think if they find out your secret? Or do you just shrug it off?

Mandatory Entry:

  • Leave a comment below to enter this giveaway (which ends 2/28).

Extra Entries:

  • Post the following on Twitter (once per day) to gain extra entries: “@adriana_r wants to know about your experience traveling w/ toys. Comment to win a vibrator and lube: http://tinyurl.com/69reepp Ends 2/28
  • Blog about this giveaway, with a direct link to the post and leave a comment below for an extra entry.

Because I am shipping this items directly, participants from all over the world can enter. (=

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Sexy Red Babydoll Set

February 20th, 2011

Sexy Red Babydoll Set

Sexy Red Babydoll Set

You know how sometimes a unique element can attract you to an item but that same element can actually be a deal breaker? This was the case with the Sexy Red Babydoll Set from MyPleasure (the fine retailer of sex toys). I’m totally still on my lingerie kick (although, I’ve received some awesome sex toys lately) and this bright red set caught my attention right away. The black details contrast nicely in pictures. The camera flash also makes this image look almost shiny or metallic but it’s really not. One thing you can’t see if that the set is pretty sheer, because of the mesh and, because the weave is super fine, it’s really soft and silky to touch.

Another detail that is easy to miss is the heart-shaped black trim that runs as the waist line of the babydoll, across the blindfold and panties. The cut-out hearts attach to eachother in a row and are made from a firmer sort of lace. This isn’t as attractive as I expected on the babydoll but is down right confusing on the panties. The row of hearts extends along the top, front of the panties and keeps going off the side, until it attaches to the black ribbons that you tie around yourself to create the panty effect. I think it would make more sense to simply sew the ribbon to the edge of the red fabric, instead of extending the hearts past the edge because then you’re worrying about twisting or even breaking them (the hearts attach in a rather narrow point)..

In fact, even if the design made more sense, I’d still struggle with this. I guess I never realized how difficult it can be to lace up a pair of panties. I still haven’t found a method that isn’t completely ridiculous and results in attractive bows, like the one on the model in the picture. The ribbon-tie design offers no stretch and will really only be flattering if your hips and abs are fairly flat. If you carry extra weight around the midsection, I wouldn’t expect it to be super flattering. Lastly, the panties are a weird style. They’re sort of a wide thong. The strip along the back is much thicker than normal but not thick enough to count as briefs. In case you’re wondering, the piece does include a cotton lined crotch.

The babydoll is absolutely the redeeming piece in the Sexy Red Babydoll Set. As I mentioned, the red mesh is super sleek and is sheer but tints the skin in a sex way. I ordered the queen size, figuring the one size fits all would run small and the queen probably runs a bit large on me, considering how roomy a babydoll is to begin with. Still, the adjustable, establish straps helps with this and the same elastic runs around back of the waistline (the front does not stretch) for added comfort and customization. One last piece of elastic makes up the rounded neckline of the piece and there’s a ruffled piece of mesh that extends above this. I’m not sure how I feel about the ruffle, yet. It could be flirty or it could just remind me of grandmas.

I’m also not sure if it’s because of the lace hearts, but this piece does offer some support for the breasts in the way of reinforced stitching. There is a petty, ribbon bow sewn into the middle of the lace at the center of the waistline. The rest of the piece free falls to approximately hip height.

The seams and hems seem quite secure (unlike the other pieces) and I’ve even slept in this piece, quite comfortable, without issue. Although the instructions say to hand wash in cold water, and I would advise this for the other pieces, you could probably toss the babydoll in the gentle cycle or normal cycle in a lingerie bag. I’ll wind up doing the former because I’m so dangerous!

The accessories of this piece would have been a disappointment if I had been looking forward to them. The “cuffs” consist of mesh sewn to elastic, to complete that ruffled look. There is a single red ribbon attached to each cuff so that you could tie them together (in a bow?) but offers absolutely no realistic, bondage function for several reasons. One, the elastic is quite loose and easy to slip out of and, two, the sewing is utter crap. I put on one cuff and immediately noticed the ribbon was ripping and becoming detached from the cuffs. These are absolutely for fashion only. Present yourself as a pretty present to your partner, then ditch them.

The quality of the blindfold is slightly higher but it boasts the design that reminds me of a sanitary napkin and, just, eww. It’s also asymmetrical in a really weird way. Even if the elastic wasn’t so loose as to render it virtually useless, the cut would make it impossible to block out all light and sights. The sewing is also very angular so, while the black-hearts-on-red may look cute form a distance, it looks sloppy and amateur up close. Luckily, the sewing on this piece is more secure than the cuffs and you could potentially shorten the elastic with a few stitches of your own. For whatever reason, Dreamgirl opted to make the backside (that touches your face) satin-y but the front is a rougher, less shiny material.

Basically, I have a babydoll that feels great on my skin and offers a lot of support. Because I can easily pair it was a basic black or red thong or pair of panties, I’d call this one a success but if you really want to love the whole set, you’ll probably be disappointed.

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Just no.

February 16th, 2011

Lately, I suppose I’ve been using up all my wit on cute, geeky boys. I want to be witty here as I tell you about my experiences on dating websites. I’ve made some funny stories and experienced some disappointment and, even though I have a specific topic in mind for this post, I have no idea how I want to start. Regardless, there is a trend I have noticed when browsing online dating profiles. People like to say this

I am outside the norm.

or maybe

If you want something not so normal.

I think you see where I’m going with this. These people are advertising that there is something about themselves they they–and likely society at large–would describe as different. This may have worked against them in terms of past relationship and dating experiences. At least, that’s the feel I get when I read these profiles. I sometimes get a clue that this is a really interesting person, one whom I’d like to get to know better and, if that’s the case, I usually do instigate some sort of correspondence. After all, some would argue that I, too, am a little outside the norm and perhaps some people are just better appreciated by kindred souls.

That’s all well and good, whatever.

What isn’t well and good is when the guise of “outside the norm” reveals something quite undesirable in a potential mate. Like the fact that this person does not believe in using periods when typing. Or showering. Or that this person is a murderer or likes to “see girls cry” (I kid you not! This was in someone’s profile and included absolutely zero context!).

I suppose it could be semantics? I mean, what is normal? What is a little outside the norm? What qualifies as bat-shit fucking crazy anyway? And who is this crazy, sex blog geek, cat-obsessed girl to judge?

The definition of “normal” that I use at any given time is something that is relatively recognizable as in line with the American dream. Growing up, starting a family, working, contributing to society. There are many ways you can personalize this to your slightly-outside-the-norm preferences and still fall somewhere around the box–at least to most outsiders. Not that you should have to but that’s sort of what I’m looking for and probably along the lines of what others who are using dating sites may have in mind, too.

But the thing about making a profile is, you’re supposed to sell yourself and if language and grammar aren’t your forte, you better open a dictionary and learn how to use spaces between your sentences. Seriously. Coming off as someone who is confusing, inconsistent or creepy may help you find your true love or scare off a bunch of potential mates.

After communicating with some of the undesirable, not-normal fellows, I have really come to appreciate how it is that people use those types of terms to describe themselves. Some people really are worth the time and others, unfortunately, use code words to hide the ugly truth. It’s like all that MySpace picture chart or any blog post that defines what certain key words mean in communication. And perhaps that is simply one of the drawbacks of searching for my next potential relationship. There’s a lot of crap to wade through before, hopefully, I find something worth my time.

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Heat

February 9th, 2011

It is less than freezing out but I do not feel the chill. The heat emanates from my body, seeps and breathes from between my legs. The heat pools around my thighs and cheeks as I squirt, for the first time in what seems like eons. It collects in the blanket below me and flows through layers of fabric to the mattress itself. Silicone and plastic have become impossibly warm from my body. My heat is strong and impervious. I am insatiable and heat spreads throughout my body as I am pushed over the edge by his words. Images fill my mind and inspiration has taken on a life of its own, so real that I can almost taste it and feel it: heat.

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Lights Outs Glow Shower Gel Raspberry

February 8th, 2011

Lights Outs Glow Shower Gel Raspberry

Lights Outs Glow Shower Gel Raspberry

You can no longer purchase this product.

If you’ve ever thought “I want to glow in the dark” or “I bet it would be cool to shower with no lights on” or if you’re just a dork, like I am, then this product might interest you. You’ll probably have to ignore the fact that the entire design is reminiscent of mini-golf courses or Chuck E Cheese but, who wouldn’t with glow in the dark body wash?!

First things first. In the image, this appears white. It’s really not. The raspberry scent is a very pale, sickly looking pink. I could do with something a little prettier but I don’t know how realistic that is, given the glow in the dark properties.

Second, this bottle is pretty damned small. The Exotic Fruit Show Gel by Shunga is exponentially larger. This is a problem when you consider how poorly this product lathers. It’s super thin and washes away so easily that I always have to reapply to my bath poof. The bottle is almost half gone after only two weeks or so of use.

Thirdly, the raspberry scent is very unsophisticated. It’s not the subtle and finely crafted scent that I prefer. Rather, it’s run of the mill and too heavy because it’s not really good. Read: cheap.

But, it does glow in the dark. After sitting in the light (my bathroom has a window so this occurs all day), the bottle will turn a light green and cast off light. It’s pretty neat and makes finding your bath products easier if, you know, the power is out. Once you start to lather, however, this quickly disappears. You can’t make any glow in the dark hand prints on your mirror or chase people around like a ghost. This is kind of a failure, in my opinion. Who wants the glowy fun to end?

So, I will be retiring this bottle until such time as I a) run out of good body wash (Skinny Dip Shower Gel is a better product) or b) plan to shower with no lights on or c) just wanna show it to someone. Not using it is the only way you’ll get your money’s worth anyway.

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Breaking Out

February 2nd, 2011

Although it has been several months since my divorce and even longer since I really communicated with my ex, I am still surprised at how affected I remain to be by him. I have gained much insight into myself, his self and us as a couple and, perhaps, I thought I had gained all that I could from the situation. But, even now, I discover things that I would not have discovered if only because I was too close to the situation.

Lately, I am re-examining myself and the impression I have developed, which was frequently based on how he saw or treated me. My latest realization focuses on the fact that, frequently, he was not describing me or seeing me as I was but he was seeing things through a filter that had everything to do with him and little with me. One thing I have come to consider is that perhaps I am not the God-awful bitch that he described me as. Perhaps he said those things and looked at me in that way because he was an unpleasant individual and, while uncomfortable with this, was unable or unwilling to change the fact.

Lately, people have commented on my sweetness and I have had a hard time accepting this. After all, I could not be sweet, could I? Not if the person I loved always called me a bitch. I couldn’t be. I could not be the things if he did not see me as those things. And he didn’t. Why would I have questioned him? But time and space has left me questioning him and the way he treated me. No longer am I questioning myself and my own value. No, I am finding self confidence and assurance that I am a worthwhile person and much of this is due to the fact that others are taking the time to tell me that I am sweet or otherwise boost my self esteem. I would be remiss to forget to mention the truly wonderful people who have, indirectly, motivated me to discover these recent insights.It is people treating me like I am worthy and the knowledge that I deserve no less than that, that has brought me here and I am sure insights will continue to come to me.

The moral of the story is that even really smart girls can develop a fucked up complex because of douchebags.

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