Fur 12″ Slapper

November 20th, 2009

Fur 12" Slapper

Fur 12" Slapper
$32.64 from Amazon

To say I was excited when I first saw the 12″ Fur Slapper would be an understatement. In fact, all of the pieces in the line are so alluring. Never mind that my husband and I decided to go blue for all our BDSM purchases; I certainly didn’t when I requested this piece for review. Getting to know this slapper has been interesting. It’s generally well made with even and clean stitching, no obvious flaws and even a leather strap attached to the handle for hanging or wearing during use. The leather is stiff and reinforced with “spring steel” which makes the slapper feel more like a paddle but, at only 12″ in length, it’s unlike any true paddle I’ve ever seen (and easy to store).

With one side lined in purple fur, it doesn’t look intimidating in the least which made it appealing to me. It’s also aesthetically pleasing but, as others have mentioned, a wider range of fur colours would be great. Currently, we’ll be sticking with the furred side which does help to sooth the blows and reduces the possibility of marks or bruising (if that’s a concern). It still does pack a bit of a punch with harder blows. Compared the Kookie Riding Crop I recently reviewed, the pain is more diffuse and heavier. The fur also muffles the sound. It sounds something like clapping chalkboard erasers together. Of course, you can deal pain-free taps instead of heavy-handed strikes. Alternatively, the fur side can be used to soothe tender flesh, as a light rubdown tool or, the way I’ve used it most, to tickle. This makes it a pretty versatile tool and it allows to make every playtime with the Fur 12″ Slapper unique.

The fur is obviously the draw of this piece, and it feels pretty nice on the skin. However, it is rather short and.. fake. It’s not really as silky as I was expecting; I guess I wanted something a bit more like my rabbit fur flogger, but the fur on this slapper just feels not real. Of course, fake fur can absolutely feel great. I’ve had some stuffed animals whose coats were quite luxurious and I think just making the fur a bit longer would make it that much more pleasurable. The fur on this tool is about 1/4″ long and can be fluffed up by running a hand against the ‘grain’ of the fur but there’s still not much there to be fluffed. Again, it’s not bad, just not as great as I expected.

If you are a fan of bigger pain, the smooth leather side may better suit your needs. Without the fur, the sensation is definitely more intense, and there is quite a bit of sting. Thud lovers may be a bit disappointed but they would probably invest in a different tool (a wood paddle, perhaps). There is some give in this slapper, but the stiffness of the leather and steel combined with over 1/4″ thickness makes it firmer than I thought and firmer than more true slappers. It seems to be a bit of a hybrid piece. The bare side also is much louder, making a slapping sound when it meets flesh.

No matter the strength I choose to exert, wielding this slapper is quite easy. The handle is long enough that I can just wrap both of my fists around it, end to end. It’s thin enough that it’s easy to grip but tapers toward the end so you won’t lose it too easily. It feels like the fur end is heavier and gravity helps pull it down without using as much strength on my part. There’s a leather strap through a secure grommet in the end. I can see the usefulness of this for storage if you have hooks (I don’t but maybe I should throw some command hooks up on the inside of the closet door) but I found it awkward during use. If I looped it around my wrist, it limited the mobility of my hand and I had to take the time to remove the loop. I’ll probably risk flinging the slapper across the room (a la Wii-mote) than have to continuously remove/replace it on my wrist.

Plus, its small sizes make it easy to store. Hell, I could just throw it between my mattress and box spring without a worry.

When it comes to construction, I was pretty impressed. As I mentioned, the stitching is done well. I cannot pinpoint any flaws, and there are no loose threads like I could see on a similar piece I own. The two leather pieces are sewn snugly together and the edges are cut flat. The purple fur is about 5.5″ long and just meets the edge of the widest part (2″) of the slapper. It is sewn (and hardily) on 3 sides using the same thread that holds together the entire slapper. However, the fourth end (which is one of the shorter ends) is loose, which could result in tearing if it gets caught on something. It probably won’t happen, but it’s something that kind of bothers me, and I’d at least like it glued down. Although I haven’t had the need to clean the Fur 12″ Slapper, I would probably it down with a damp cloth. Easy enough.

My complaints about the Fur 12″ Slapper are not major. The cord and fur issues really fall into the realm of personal preference. It’s well made, affordable and, although small, can be used for a variety of sensations. It would be well placed in anyone’s toy box.

2 Comments

Categories: BDSM, Reviews

Kookie Riding Crop

November 17th, 2009

Kookie Riding Crop

Kookie Riding Crop
$24 from Babeland

This is an archived review of a discontinued item. You can try this silicone crop or Sportsheets crop, instead.

Riding crops are sleek. I’ve never been an equestrian but so are horses. I suppose someone thought the same thing about humans to adapt the tool.. Or maybe not. Just a conjecture.

I do know a bit more about playing with riding cops after playing with my very first one, the Kookie Riding Crop from Babeland. I know that the Kookie Crop is made of a handle attached to a nylon-covered shaft, which is then secured to a piece of folded-over leather to make the tongue. The handle is made of a firm plastic or silicone piece, which is textured and has a lightly engraved diamond pattern, which makes it easy to hold even under slipper circumstances. The braided cover of the rod is secure and neat, and the leather of the tongue is thin, unfinished on the inside (although I’m not sure why anyone would be feeling it other than for review purposes), and sewn in an arc around the shaft with contrasting thread. At its widest, it’s only 1.5″ wide and the thin “neck” of that piece is then further secured by a thin piece of string which is wrapped countless times around the tongue and shaft. It seems like the string was then treated with something to make it quite hard and firm. Overall, the quality is decent. For only, $18, this seem to be a good starter crop that will like a while, if not forever.

I was a bit surprised at the overall length of this crop, admittedly. I expected something a bit longer and a quick glance at a variety of crops shows that many are in the 24″-25″ range. However, the Kookie Crop is not far off at 18.5″ in length. I do think the slightly shorter shaft makes it a bit less flexible than other crops. I’m not positive because I’m quite the amateur in this; it just seems like a longer shaft would allow for a bit more flexibility but it could just seem that way. Either way, the tongue can be pulled back about 30 degrees – which seems to be a good amount of flexibility without becoming floppy – and then released to flick. That flick is definitely noticeable but, because of the length, this method seems to work better, the closer I am to the target and it certainly cannot be used too far away because the crop simply won’t reach.

Of course, I was surprised at other methods this toy can be used. The generic method is to simply flick a wrist at arm’s length but my pathetically weak wrists couldn’t deliver a blow nearly as powerful as using my whole arm. This was the method I had to use to get a good feel of the crop when using it on myself. I guess that’s good news for those solo BDSMers; you can easily bend yourself over and swing away. My experience was that swings focusing more on the leather-only part of the tongue were less intense than swings that involve the end of the shaft.

I was actually quite surprised at the range of sensation provided by the Kookie Riding Crop when used in the traditional manner. It can be used to simply tap, not cause any pain at all. Even my medium to strong strikes were bearable (at least on my ass), the marks outlasting the pain by far. The feeling would be more intense on more sensitive parts, of course, but it could be used comfortably on the vulva area, I think. I found the aftermath provided a sort of warmth and hypersensitivity to the area struck. Actually, I might be more of a masochist than I knew because that feeling is great! The feel of the strike itself feels much like a slap and stings like one as well.

Alternatively, one could focus on using just the edge of the tongue with a quick back and forth motion which feels more like frictional (I had to look up that adjective; wouldn’t frictious sound better?) rubbing. It’s not quite intense and becomes like an uncomfortable chafing after prolonged exposure. Lastly, the handle can be used for impact, like sort of a makeshift cane. The blows from the handle definitely feel heavier. I suppose that is what it meant when one describes “thuddy” impacts. I imagine this method would more quickly result in bruises, and it’s the type of pain I definitely do not like in any sense, although some surely do.

Of course, the stiff leather tongue wasn’t nearly as fun to run over the skin for general sensation play. Other toys with suede, premium leather or even fur are better for that. The handle could be used for penetration but it’s thin enough that it would leave me unimpressed unless there was a specific goal that I am not creatively enough endowed to think of.

When it comes to wielding a crop, I was definitely impressed. This lightweight instrument is so completely easy to use and really isn’t taxing at all. I completely understand the description on the product page when it says it “will have you betting to see which lasts longer–your arm or their ass.” I also love the slapping sound, which makes it fun for striking all sorts of things when a partner is blindfolded to make them jump. There’s lots of potential for mind fuckery. It’s a treat for the eyes as well, leaving quite the skin bright red without much effort at all.

Overall, the Kookie Riding Crop is a steal. It does what it advertises well but doesn’t do much more. I’m not sure why Babeland needs to ship it in a giant, 3″ long prism box, however. It dwarfed the lonely crop inside (which I do not believe was further packaged, nor did it have any tags/info) and I’m sure there are smaller, less wasteful ways to send it – like a poster tube, perhaps.

2 Comments

Categories: BDSM, Reviews

Kinklab leather wrist cuffs – black

October 23rd, 2009

Kinklab leather wrist cuffs - black

Kinklab leather wrist cuffs - black
$35.95 from Store.OfSexAndLove.com

I recently reviewed the Kinklab Padded Leather Blindfold. Aside from some minor pinching and slipping, it was a good piece, basic but functional. That’s pretty much how I’d sum up their leather wrist cuffs as well. They arrived in a similar plastic tube, from which I had to pry off the cap and on which is an image of the cuffs in use (but it’s not obscene).

Out of the tube, I saw that these cuffs do not have the common belt buckle style closure, which Kinklab calls “self keeping.” Rather, when you wrap it around your wrist, the bottom layer has a pseudo-D ring that slips through the slit of your choice on the overlapping piece. Then, a thin strip of leather is pulled through that D-ring, over the hole to secure it in place. Given enough space, you could potentially loop the strap through other holes for extra security. It’s not foolproof; if that is your goal, you can slip a padlock or something similar through the ring. On the other side is another ring that can be used to attach the cuffs to restraints or each other.

Of course, no locks or connectors are included. This was easily remedied with a trip to Lowe’s and, eventually, Walmart. It doesn’t mean the cuffs are bad per se, but that would be nice, especially because the staples are not like other D-rings or O-rings I’ve experienced. In fact, they’re not really rings are all but are open and shaped something like the Greek Omega with longer feet. Because of this unique shape, these staples are definitely smaller than I am used to, and some hardware may not fit.

The staples and the leather strap are all fastened with metal rivets which seem quite secure. In fact, these cuffs look pretty unassuming and weren’t quite as pleasing to the eye as I might have liked, but I was surprised at how well they held up while I had my husband restrained. Despite much thrashing and movement, the rivets stayed secure, and the cuffs never came open. However, we played probably just over an hour, and the thin leather straps were definitely coming loose. Eventually, the cuffs would have given way. Still, I’m surprised by how well they did hold without using a lock. Of course, some people would find this design a positive because it can easily be undone by fingers, teeth or even toes.

Over this time, he never complained of any discomfort, either. The edges are blunt, and the leather itself is malleable enough to wear comfortably, but they’re also not buttery soft as I have heard some leather described. The outside is shiny and smooth, while the inside of the cuffs are unfinished but relatively soft. The cuffs fit him well, on the third hole or so, with a bit of room to spare. They are cut to fit a range of 5.5″ to 7″, which is right in the middle, but those with smaller or larger wrists will be out of luck. Kinklab’s black leather wrist cuffs are just not meant to accommodate everyone.

Yet, they even surpassed my husband’s expectations. He expected to have bruises in the morning; however, there were none to be found. I don’t think there were any marks to be found, even immediately after playing, and this definitely eases his mind.

For less than $40, the quality and performance of the Kinklab leather wrist cuffs are absolutely acceptable. I would recommend them to anyone just starting out when it comes to bondage or anyone who finds themselves needing a bit more than the “kinky kits” usually contain. I would eventually like to make more of an investment, but, for now, these are great.

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Categories: BDSM, Reviews

Kinklab padded leather blindfold

October 16th, 2009

Kinklab padded leather blindfold

Kinklab padded leather blindfold
$33 from Store.OfSexAndLove.com

Update: I have even accidentally put this through the washing machine, and it’s held up pretty well!

Since my husband’s return, I’ve made more of an effort to get into BDSM which meant I needed a quality blindfold (and more “hardcore” cuffs but that’s something else entirely). Kinklab’s Padded Leather Blindfold seemed to fit the bill. It was contoured to fit the face better than cheap “sleep mask” type blindfolds and was affordably priced in the $20 like many leather blindfolds.

The padded leather blindfold arrived in a functional plastic tube container. On each end is a black plastic cap, while the tube itself is clear. There is a paper insert with the product name and a picture of a woman wearing it, which isn’t explicit but does indicate the nature of the product. I thought I could pull off the top of the container by the little loop, but it broke. Instead, I had to press in the sides to break the seal and then pop it off. It’s very secure, which is good but a little bit of a hassle if you want to use it for storage; however, it’s a decent storage solution because the loop (if you don’t break it off) makes it able to be hung.

As the name suggests, this blindfold is padded and leather. The front side is a stiffer leather and you can see the stitches, in black, around the edge. The sewing is well done without any loose threads. The back, which sits against the face, has a softer padding where it would sit across the eyes. The edges are flush and flat feeling; they’re not silky soft or uncomfortable. The elastic strap is securely stitched to either side; on one side is also a clothing-style tag with the Kinklab label, which also says it’s made in the USA.

During use, I found my eyes to be comfortable but the edges above the nose and toward the side applied pressure to my face. I could feel the stiffer leather around the edges where there was no padding. My husband did not experience this problem, however; I would attribute this to specific facial builds and the fact that the blindfold seems to be pretty big; at its widest, it’s nearly 3″ tall, which seems pretty big to me, and the bridge is over 1″ thick which I think is the cause of my personal discomfort. Of course, I do have a smaller face than some. This mask is bound to fit some people better than others.

This is especially true because it is secured by a simple elastic strap. Lying flat, the blindfold measures in at right around 20″ and I’d say you can get 4″ or so stretch from it but anyone who falls out of that range is out of luck. The blindfold could probably be sewn or otherwise manipulated for smaller headed folks but it’s not meant to be adjustable. Otherwise, this 3/4″ thick strap is made of a soft, elastic that’s fairly comfortable.

This blindfold is pretty effective at blacking out light. Because it is contoured, I can pull it a bit lower on my nose, and I cannot see any light or movement around the eyes or nose. I could see the vaguest light toward the side of the blindfold but it’s really not enough to detect movement. Unfortunately, it’s more comfortable for me to wear this blindfold higher, which negates that property, but my husband didn’t experience that as an issue.

One issue I do have is that, no matter how you cut it, this blindfold is not foolproof. Because of the give in the elastic band, my husband was able to rub his head against the bed to remove the strap. This is perhaps not the best blindfold for a feisty partner. Then again, this freedom can work well for someone who is a bit anxious about playing with a blindfold. A buckle style blindfold might work better for my purposes.

Overall, the Kinklab padded leather blindfold is good quality and effective at blocking out light. I found it to be a little stiff initially so I hope it softens over time; this will definitely improve the comfort issues I had. Although it’s not super secure, it’s generally a good multipurpose accessory for BDSM play.

3 Comments

Categories: BDSM, Reviews

S&M 101

July 13th, 2009

S&M 101

S&M 101
14.44 from Amazon

Although it’s been years since I’ve had to go to school on a Monday morning, you’ll be happy to know I’ve been keeping up with my homework. 😉

For years, I have intended to pick up S&M 101 by Jay Wiseman because it has been unanimously recommended to me. S&M 101 is perhaps the quintessential BDSM book on the market and it is more than titled appropriately. From the moment I picked it up, I understood why. This is no flimsy volume but a nearly-400 page tome of information about BDSM and, although it contains much information, is it a quick read and I was halfway through it in a matter of days, simply reading through it as I waited for pages and programs to load in my computer. Furthermore, Mr Wiseman’s casual yet knowledgeable tone stresses safety and caution in all things risky (which BDSM is) without ever sounding condescending or holding the “holier than thou attitude” which runs rampant among many BDSM participants and can be a serious deterrent to struggling newcomers. It may not be the only resource in your collection but it’s a perfect first.

I suspect this will be a lengthy review, because it is a lengthy book. Although Mr. Wisemen does not discuss every single aspect of BDSM in minute detail, he covers a great many aspects and in a depth I appreciate. I like specific answers and SM101 provides me with those, specific answers about BSDM. While many of the ideas he presents are not new to me, he gives refreshing details. I’d like to take a moment to explain that, in his book, Jay uses SM as an umbrella term rather than BDSM and it seems this is simply due to the trends at the time when it was published (first edition in 1992 and this, the second edition, sometime between 1996 and 2000).

SM101 starts with a sort of introduction from Jay Wiseman about how he started writing this book as well as how he started in BDSM. It’s interesting but I found it to be long. Some of his personal experiences might have been more interesting at the end of the book; instead, they felt like a speed bump on my way to the “real” material. That material starts with a chapter on the Basic Basics which will outlines consent and safety measures – with a negotiation form – and Finding Partners which aids in finding partners through ads and club, by your sexual orientation and ends with advice for introducing BDSM to your existing relationship.

Next come several chapters on the more physical aspects of BDSM (Bondage, Flagellation, Clamps etc) as well as some thoughts on Lubricants. In these sections, the author discusses different BDSM gear, where to buy it, characteristics of quality gear and how to use it. You will not be an expert in physical BDSM but reading this book can definitely aid in your understanding of these tools. For instance, SM101 taught me that cheap handcuffs are often identical cuffs instead of mirror images and have a 3 link chain. I now know to keep an eye out for a quality pair of S&W cuffs, should I be in the market for them. Information as specific as this is available about gags, riding crops and rope, just to name a few.

Of particular note is the Bondage 1A which discusses only rope including qualities, care, and illustrations of knots and the best positions with which to use them to bind a person (genital bondage, anyone?). Although I am not a fan of rope, I found this chapter to be suggestively helpful without being commanding.

The physical chapters finish up with Erotic Torture in which Mr. Wiseman discusses various techniques of teasing and torturing a submissive from sensation play to sex toys to electricity to blades. Again, he reflects his beliefs about taking it slow and safe to minimize risk. The chapter is wrapped up with several masturbation techniques to use on a person.

The chapters following, including Humiliation, D/s Interactions, and SM Relationships focus on the emotional dynamics of BDSM. Jay outlines qualities desired in both players, including the four basic duties of a submissive (To serve needs, to obey orders, to accept domination, to please desires).He touches on the significance of the collar, basic positions for training and punishment. SM Relationships probes beyond the scene, to the lifestyle. The ideas in these chapters are rather traditional and rigid and certainly do reflect power exchange well but while it will work well for some, this information may not be as helpful to others.

The remaining chapters focus on safety and resources, in general. SM Organizations suggests ways to locate and advice for joining BDSM groups but will definitely be more helpful to those who live in areas which already have established communities. Jay does include suggestions for those wanting to start their own as well. A chapter on General Safety Considerations includes BDSM while pregnant and common emergencies during a scene (The 5 Fs: freakouts, falls, fainting, failure, and fire). SM and Safer sex focuses on reducing the risk of spreading STDs but focuses narrowly on AIDs. I suspect that a book written more recently would focus more on issues surrounding HPV (but they are both risks to be well aware of).

There is a chapter which outlines a typical scene between a Domme and male submissive. Following this is a chapter listing suggestions for your BDSM starter set which includes not only BDSM toys but everyday, household items which you can put to good use as well. SM Sayings is essentially a list of commandments about practicing. Related Practices includes activities/fetishes/lifestyles which tend to have overlap with BDSM like Age Play and Polyamory; Wisemen includes contact information for groups which specialize in these activities. Finding Help With Problems provides further resources for issues such as abuse and rape. Jay suggests even further reading in References and Resources, as well as some books which are not recommended.

Finally, the book wraps up with a glossary of terms used and 3 Appendices: Sample Event Rules which is self-explanatory, SM and the Internet and a sobering Monograph on Breath Control Play which, by no means, should be skipped because it is the last section of the book.

As you can see, this book does discuss many aspects of BDSM and in great detail – greater than I would be able to describe without making this review too unruly (although, I would be glad to answer specific questions). Wiseman does so in a no-nonsense manner, repeatedly stressing to take things slow and use safety measures. It’s also a very approachable manner and I chuckled a time or two at the book, like when he describes helping a Domme test eyebolts in a wall with a lacey pink pillow strapped to his head, lest one pop out and hit him (it did). It is a solid book.

But it is not without its flaws. As a critical person, I found the strange font face to be distracting until I become accustomed to it. I would absolutely reprint this book using a more standard font; it looks sloppy as-is. Furthermore, Wiseman includes sometimes-relevant quotes on pages. They are generally thoughts from players which reflect thoughts and attitudes about BDSM, sometimes quotes from the page. They do not always seem to be relevant to the content on the page (sometimes I can see how they’re supposed to relate but they fail to do so) and, quite frankly, sometimes they do not add to the book at all. I have also touched on how some of the advice about interactions and relationships is very traditional and rigid. For this reason, I found the chapters about physical BDSM more helpful but this is mostly due to personal preference.

Still, the most glaring flaw of SM101 is that it is dated. Extremely so. Wiseman lists contact information in several places but it is only ever addresses and phone numbers. Unfortunately, there is no way for the reader to know whether or not this information is up to date or even if these groups and people still exist. And who writes for information anymore, anyway? I have never once. Website URLS would be entirely more useful.

Additionally, he makes many mentions of newsgroups on Usenet and, well, this summer marks a decade I’ve been using the internet and I’ve probably joined less than a dozen newsgroups in that time, none of which I ever stuck around very long. I know it’s difficult to write about the internet as websites come and go and there’s so many it could easily be a book on its own but a mention of strong sites like FetLife, Alt.com or Bondage.com would offer more potential than newsgroups which only serve as a forum for spambots. You can basically skip the second Appendix because, even though it’s probably some of the “newer” information in the book, it’s still decrepit.

I wonder why SM101 is only the second edition when there were only a few short years since the first was published. Following that timeline, it could be on the 4th or 5th printing by now.

In the end, this book is best for uber newbies, folks who have no way to contract BDSM info or those who want to introduce the subject to their lovers. It could certainly be a book to study religiously before or even have open during your first few scenes and the ideas in it will set you up well. It will still be useful for those who have a more experience under the belt and anyone who is looking for a specific piece of information which to page through once more but will not be quite as useful. Despite what I see as a major flaw, I would still absolutely recommend it in yuor collection of sex toys and information.

A realistic introduction, indeed.

14 Comments

Categories: Books, Reviews

Come

April 4th, 2009

“Come.”

With one finger, I slowly motion her forward. She moves, unsure at first but then quickly makes up the time, fearing my wrath. Head low, ass high. My eyes trace the curve of naked flesh along her back. Thin fabric traces the crack of her ass, dividing it into two perfectly round cheeks silhouetted against the dark background behind her. She moves fluidly, sliding one leg in front of the other, stretching one arm out and then the other. She keeps her palms flat against the ground as I request.

In between her movements, I see the roundness of her breasts sway beneath her body. She is beautiful but it is more than that. She moves sensually. She emits sexuality. Is that a drop I see, already forming on her skin? It slips silently to the floor, unnoticed by my slave as she inches nearer. The sight of her nervousness, her fear, he desire sends a shudder down my spine. I suppress shivering but can’t help the blood from rushing between my legs. My clit tingles as it grows hard and I entertain fantasies of her in my mind.

I keep careful eye on her hair, she knows I don’t like when it’s touched the ground. She is careful but there has been a time or two when she has forgotten. Sometimes she is too anxious too approach – or too fearful – and she forgets. It’s times like those when I lash her wrists to the wall and lash her flesh with a flogger. Rarely, do I make her bleed but I have and I will, when it’s necessary. It won’t be necessary now. I can tell she is concentrating.

She reaches the ground in front of me. Cold concrete to remind her that she is the one on the floor, not I. She remains with her head down, her hair floats just above the ground and I reach down to pull it over her one shoulder. I drag a nail over her now bare shoulder and it leaves a welt but I do not break the skin. With her hands placed against the ground, I reach for a shackle built into the leg of my chair. My hair falls around her as I do, tickling her skin but she knows better than to make a sound. Were she allowed to look up, she would see my breasts pushing against my bra as I lean forward. But she is not, does not.

The shackle is around her wrist. I know she can see its origin. They’re a recent addition to my throne and if she is surprised, she makes no sound. I spot the smallest movement form her, however. I grin. She has not grown complacent yet. Good. I lean to my other side, fastening the second cuff around her wrist. Fine dark brown leather, worked with gold filigree. Neither are colours I would normally choose but something about this combination pulled at me. The leather is still stiff and I know it will prove to have an extra bite. I may have been a little slack lately. She deserves no special treatment now.

With both wrists secure, I lean back in chair, slide my hips forward. I’m sure she hears the movement which I follow by lifting one leg over her shoulder. Bending it at the knee, I rest the heel of my boot on her ass. The point sinks into her flesh and I smile. At last she emits a soft sound, barely audible, but I know the heel is biting her flesh. At this distance, I see the thong cutting into her hips. I often gift her items that are too small. The gift reminds her of me and the discomfort reminds her of her place in life, just as the silver collar around her neck does both.

With my leg lifted my pussy is exposed. She has surely been aware of this, the cunt slut that she is. I instruct her curtly.

“Eat, girl.”

Slowly, she raises her body up so that her mouth is level with my cunt. I stifle a gasp as her tongue flits between my lips from between her pouty, red lips. She has such a beautiful mouth, so perfect for her current duty. And she does it well. My heat pounds faster as her tongue travels down my lips and back up, around my clit. But she won’t stay for long. She knows what happens if she teases. That’s my job not sure.

I sink my heel further into her ass as she puts her expert skills to good use. Her mouth surrounds my clit as her tongue darts this way and back. She begins to suck on my clit and it’s all I can do to keep my composure. I love to surprise her when I come, to squirt all over her face unexpectedly. She always makes such faces, so unglorified, so unladylike. She thinks of herself as elegant, classy even, but I love putting her in positions she can’t control, to force those natural reactions that she would eradicate had she the power to change human nature. Of course there’s nothing like seeing your slut, covered in your own cum. It always gives me such satisfaction.

I bite my lip harshly as her tongue probes inside, but not for long. She knows where I like the focus and she returns to my clit, licking from the base to the lip in a slow, unbroken motion. I swear, with just one movement she has made my clit grow. Involuntarily, I’ve begun to grind my hips against her face. So much for opacity. She moans at my reaction and, instinctively, I shoot up, reaching behind her to smack her ass. Hard. And again. Her skin is bright red after only making contact twice. I have hit her harder than I intended but she knows better, now.

“Shut up, slut.”

I think I feel a slight nod as she continues, never breaking her mouth from my pussy despite the spanking. She’s pushing her tongue against my clit roughly now, just how I like it. Rather than returning my heel to her ass, I drape my leg over the arm of the chair, spreading my pussy open for all the see. She moves forward, having more access now. She is not accustomed to not being able to use her hands but you wouldn’t. know the difference.

Her tongue dances talented across my clit, around my lips. She even licks down my mons, following the thin strip of hair I let grow down to my clit once again. This time she works with a fervor, as though her life depends on my orgasm. I let her think it just may. I chuckle to myself.

And then I feel it. Building up deep within, my orgasm builds. I’m not even sure there is an ounce of blood left in any part of my body. My clit so impossibly hard as she works her magic. It’s coming fast, faster than I prepared for. Soon, my orgasm is barreling through my body like a train. Nothing can stop this force. My hips buck involuntarily and I grab the back of her head, tangling my fingers in her hair. My orgasm rolls over my body and I feel the contractions of my cunt, each one separate and strong yet all part of the same. I finally let go as I come, moaning and fucking her face as I push a stream of cum against her face. I feel it dripping down my cunt. Like a good girl, she has never stopped and my pleasure keeps coming.

As my orgasm subsides I pull my hips away. My cum is streaming down her face. Hair has plastered to her skin. She looks entirely ungraceful, now. She looks like my slut. She is my slut. I stand.

“Come,” I direct her. And she does, pulling at the shackles around her wrists. I can hear her moan as her body responds to my demand, even as I walk away.

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Categories: Stories

What to Say When She’s Tied Up

March 29th, 2009

The other day, a newbie joined a community of which I am a member. This person posted on the forums asking for help. You see, his wife had recently expressed to him her desire to be dominated and while he wanted to help, he wasn’t exactly sure how. I suspect this loving husband was not the only one who was confused. It seemed as though the wife, although she had acted as a “freaky lady” (his adoring words, not mine) was also confused about what she wanted. Perhaps she felt shame or embarrassment or was simple as uncertain about what steps to take to explore this new side of her sexuality.

She was able to eventually explain that while, yes, the physical was a turn on, it was really the words that got her juices flowing the most. As a fellow word lover, I can understand. Her husband, as eager as he was to assist, just didn’t know exactly what to say in the bedroom in order to give his wife the dominance she desired.

I found his plea for help refreshing and the way he wanted to work with his wife to explore this was touching. Although no expert in BDSM, I have been interested for many years. I might also I have played out many a BDSM fantasy in my head (sometimes as masturbation fodder, yes) and I thought I would give him a few suggestions.

  • Use words and nicknames which designate that she is the one without power. IE: little, girl, mine, bitch, slut, whore, etc (“Daddy’s girl,” “You’re such a slut for me,” “What do we have here? A cock hungry little girl?” “Do you like it when I do X”)
  • Require permission for things like switching positions, stopping oral, taking off clothes (yours, hers or both), getting in a certain position, etc and inflict punishment when this is ignored. (“Did I say you could do that?” spank when she does not ask permission or ignores)
  • Require her to address you in a certain way (“Sir” “Master”)
  • Tease and/or offer things in a manner which reminds her who is in charge (“wouldn’t you like that?” “you want me to go down on you, do you?” “Do you think you deserve X?”)
  • Use words like “allow” “give” “permission” “acceptance” when referring to letting her do/have something while she uses terminology which says she wants you to do X rather than “we do X.”
  • Make her “earn” treats such as oral, vaginal or anal sex, massage or her favourite position and show gratefulness for what you do (If you grant permission, require her to say “Thank You” or show it! “What do you say when I allow you to do X?”).
  • Require her to be ready for sex in a certain room and position at X date and time (“I expect you to be spread eagle, naked on the bed this Friday as soon as I return from work.”)
  • Suggest (and enforce) how you want her to appear (shaved pussy or not, panties/bra, other clothes, makeup and hair). Give her a “check” every X days.

The fact is, exploring anything new can be difficult, especially if you have a routine which works. We fear sounding or looking silly or unattractive even if we find new ideas to be arousing. The first time I wore something especially ‘sexy’ for my husband, I was terrified even though we were already married. I knew he would ultimately still love me and find me attractive even if he didn’t like what I put on but what if he just found me to be stupid?

And I’m not alone. Taking the first steps to incorporate BDSM into your sex life, wear a sexy costume, do a strip tease or role play can all be daunting tasks. Fortunately, I have some advice for all of these things. Sometimes you just have to fake it ’til you make it. As cliche as it sounds, sometimes we have to push ourselves to do uncomfortable things and fake the confidence until we actually develop it and can enjoy these activities.

On a more specific level, the mechanics of movement and words to use during specifics situations are things with which many struggle. People want to know what to say and how to say it and having a guide to work with can also bolster confidence. A lot of times, we can fudge our way through uncomfortable situations if we have something to work with. Remember the oral sex manual from American Pie? It was revered not only because of the content but because of the impact is had on those who used it.

So, for this doting husband who wasn’t sure what to say in order to dominate his wife the way she wanted, I suggested he say these things.

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Categories: Advice, Articles

Image © MisterUnlucky; used with permission.