Better Than Chocolate

September 21st, 2009

Better Than Chocolate

Better Than Chocolate
$89.90 from Amazon

Let me preface this with a great big thank you to Babeland for allowing me to review this luxury vibrator. I believe I am one of only five reviewers who had the chance, and I definitely appreciate it. Also, pictures will be coming soon. Apparently, something broke.

Jumping right in, I think it’s appropriate to say that anything named Better Than Chocolate had better be leaps and bounds above comparable items if it wants to come anywhere near its claim. I mean, it’s freaking chocolate, right? So I had some pretty high expectations for this vibe by Nomi Tang. It had better look great, be presented well, have all the details covered, be hygienically superior, perform well (including features and ease of use), and do all this in a way that is obviously unique. Let me run down this list and show you how well the Better Than Chocolate did.

Appearance: It’s only right to start with appearance because this is what initially drew me and others to this ergonomic clitoral vibrator. I’m always interested in uniquely shaped clit vibes, and the Better than Chocolate definitely fits the bill. In fact, it is somehow reminiscent of Star Trek and I know I’m not the only one who thinks so. I know I’m going to miss the mark by trying to describe this toy but, from the top, it’s roughly diamond shaped – wider in the center and tapering at either end. From the side, you can see that the wider middle also curves upward and each side curves up more than the rest of the toy, in a wing-like shape, creating a perfect resting spot for your hand while the bottom curves around your pubic mound. If you look at the vibe from either end, it actually looks a bit like a king cobra.

In comparison to other similar vibes, Better Than Chocolate is much larger. It’s definitely wider (2.5″ at its widest), longer (just over 4″) and taller(just under 2.5″) than the Laya Spot (and some people already find that too large for use during sex, so take heed). Their shapes are generally similar but the lines on Better Than Chocolate seem to be more exaggerated. My understanding of Lelo’s Lily and Nea is that they are also much flatter and smaller than the Layaspot so if you’re partial to that size/shape, you might be in for a surprise when it comes to Better Than Chocolate.

The longer end boasts a thin, plastic-covered, white touch censor, which also adds to the Sci-fi appeal, especially when it lights up blue or red. The other end has a small indentation of the power symbol, like a computer’s power button, which clicks the toy on and off but doesn’t add much in terms of visuals.

Available in either fuchsia or blue, Better Than Chocolate is sure to please most.

Presentation and Detail: This luxury vibe is definitely presented well. It comes in a heavy white cardboard box, like Lelo’s boxes, with the Nomi Tang logo in maroon on top (the logo is also printed, smaller, tone-on-tone all over the box). The box flips open from one end like a jewelry box, and the vibe itself sits on a velvet-lined cardboard tray within the box, which adds to the jewelry box feel. The box is also velvet lined and has Nomi Tang printed on the inside top. As is, the box would serve as a nice giftbox, if you gift a Better Than Chocolate vibrator to someone.

Upon removing the vibe from the box and tray, you’ll see it comes with an instruction book, a storage pouch and a message from Nomi Tang printed like a mini greeting card. Like anyone, I’m a fan of storage and because this vibrator is unique, an instruction booklet is a must. Of course, the inventive controls are definitely unique and show care/effort on Nomi’s part. Nomi Tang definitely paid attention to detail with this one.

Hygiene and Material; The booklet says that the surface materials are TPE and polycarbonate. I assume the censor is polycarbonate (a type of plastic), while the rest of the surface is made of TPE. I’m not sure what this means in terms of porosity because the TPE just seems to be a coating over a hard (plastic?) shell but I wouldn’t consider Better Than Chocolate something you can sanitize completely. This also means that Better Than Chocolate is quite rigid. You’d cause some damage if you threw it at someone’s head.

Performance and Features: I was a bit nervous about Better Than Chocolate because it runs on only 2AAAs (and, wouldn’t you know it, I was fresh out). The power button end twists off easily and twists back on very securely, which is important for any waterproof toy (it is!).

One click of the power symbol easily turns on the Better Than Chocolate. It’s easily felt and heard and the “NT” symbol on the touch sensor lights up. It seems that this vibrator starts on its highest setting which might disappoint some because if you’re a glutton for power, the impression is not just a taste of what Better Than Chocolate has to offer; it’s it. I was fairly impressed with the strength of vibration on this one. It’s right up there with the Laya Spot and definitely makes better use of the batteries than many toys. On the other hand, the lower settings are something I’d never have use for.

The vibrations are rather high in frequency but don’t make my hand tickle uncontrollably when holding it. They are focused in the tip but can be felt, mildly, through the rest of the toy. Better Than Chocolate never operates at much more than a low hum which I think is perfectly acceptable.

On to what you all want to know! How is the touch censor? It’s okay. It takes some getting used to. I found that I wanted to press it like a button instead of hold and slide my finger over it but, once I got over that, I quite like it. The censor means you don’t need 8 buttons nor do you have to press one button 8 times. It’s a very efficient way to control a multi-setting toy and I wouldn’t mind seeing use of this type of control more.

When it starts, on high, slide your finger toward the NT symbol to lower the vibrations or do the opposite from low. If you want something other than steady vibrations, hold your finger over the NT until it switches modes. From what I can tell, there are 2 modes: steady vibes, low pulsation and high pulsation. The high pulsation is a very enjoyable, throbbing pulse that surprised me by its power. If you find a setting you really like, you can hold your finger over the opposite end of the censor for 2 seconds to lock it; the NT logo will change to red.

In practice, I thought it would make more sense to increase vibes by sliding toward the logo and I tend to forget this. Also, because it’s a touch sensor, your speed, mode, and even lock status can be changed if something touches the censor on the Better Than Chocolate. My panties, thighs, and blankets changed the settings at one point or another. I think it might have been slightly more logical to make an actual lock switch somewhere on the toy because it’s absolutely necessary with a control as sensitive as this.

Although I will likely not use this vibrator in much water, you can, up to one meter. So if you ever need to get off in the pool or the ocean, go for it. It also means you needn’t be extra careful with cleaning so soap it up all over.

In Use: I found that Better Than Chocolate was just too large, too long. It’s not bulky per se but isn’t palm sized, either. It didn’t fit over my mons as well as I would like so it wasn’t effortless playtime. I don’t see how it would work well during sex at all.

I also found that the vibrating end was just too pointed and hard. I need something a little flatter and wider to provide adequate pressure, but Better Than Chocolate only provides pain if I press. I tried the other end, but the vibrations were much weaker, and this wasn’t any better. On the other hand, I was able to partially insert this vibrator and I found that to be enjoyable. If you like to stimulate the first couple of inches of the vagina and the surrounding area, Better Than Chocolate succeeds there.

I definitely needed to adjust to this vibe rather than use it in my typical way. This also means using lube, which I don’t normally do with clit toys. The TPE is finished soap that it’s sort of velvety, almost feeling like fabric and this creates a lot of friction. But once I applied a dab of lube, it was easy to move the tip of the Better Than Chocolate over, under, and around my vulva and clit.

Payoff: Although I did achieve orgasm, it was difficult and long in coming. After the initial orgasm, however, the following ones were almost effortless and came quickly. When all was said and done, I did feel quite satiated.

Final Thoughts: Nomi Tang’s Better Than Chocolate vibrator is solid and quality but not better than chocolate. It’s unique and, although the touch censor has some way to go before it’s perfect, offers a viable alternative to other vibrator controls. Although it gave me satisfying orgasms, I’d like to see it in a smaller size and perhaps rechargeable. Only then would I consider it to be a truly “luxury” vibe and be able to recommend it whole heartedly, especially at its current price.
Better Than Chocolate Luxury Vibrator Better Than Chocolate Luxury Vibrator Better Than Chocolate Luxury Vibrator

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Categories: Reviews, Vibrators

Berman Adonis G-Spot and Clitoral Stimulator

August 8th, 2009

Berman Adonis G-Spot and Clitoral Stimulator

Berman Adonis G-Spot and Clitoral Stimulator
N/A from

This is an archived review of a discontinued toy.

I don’t know much about Dr Laura Berman except that she’s been on Oprah a time or two (even her Wikipedia page is scant, which is shocking for “America’s leading expert in female sexual health”) . I think we all know that the Cult of Oprah readily accepts the people and products that are on her show, giving them attention and praise (not to mention revenue), whether or not they are worthy of said attention and praise. Needless to say, I was dubious about how well a Berman Center product would work, especially with the disappointments I’ve had with Sue Johanson’s line of toys. After using Adonis, a dual stimulator, I now feel that Dr Berman knows her shit; she just doesn’t know how (or care) to put it together in the perfect package.

Right from the package, I noticed some differences between Dr Berman’s toy and every other toy I’ve ever tried. First, the box is a cool rhombus s shape from the top or bottom and I’m pretty sure that’s the first time I’ve used that word since geometry. LOL The outside panels boast the name, type of toy with the Berman Center logo a woman/uterus and a tidbit of information about Dr Berman and the toy itself. The front is actually a doubled-over flap, which opens to provide more information and a list of other Berman Center products. Initially, I didn’t even notice this, it sat so flush with the box.

This is a shame because the instructions for use explain the location of the G-spot when on your back and even explain that you may feel the urge to urinate. Although it’s not a complete guide to the G-spot, it makes this toy a lot easier to use for beginners. There’s also a note to only use oil or water-based lube and not to submerge when washing. I really wish every company provided this much useful information.

Inside, the box was fairly impressive too. It was made very secure by a piece of thicker cardboard which lined it. The Adonis G-spot and Clitoral Stimulator was inside a sealed plastic bag and that bag, in turn, sat inside another clear plastic bag with the control/battery pack. For anyone who has opened a box to find their toy floating alone amongst packing material after coming out of a horribly secured package, this is a step up for sure. There is also a thin, purple, organza bag included. The bag is nothing amazing but is definitely better than nothing at all. I like it, even if it doesn’t match.

The Adonis is a narrow C-shaped toy with a G-spot hook on one end and some soft nubbies on the other. It’s made of a pliable TPR silicone, not pure silicone. I don’t think the package actually makes this differentiation. On the plus side, it doesn’t seem to pick up lint at all. There is a slight texture which provides a bit of friction. Even at its thickest, the Adonis is no more than average penis girth, if that. It filled decently. I found the G-spot end provided very adequate stimulation but the clitoral nubs sat a little looser against my vulva than I’d like, resulting in a very light touch. If you like only a light touch, I would recommend this. Unfortunately, the shape wasn’t conducive to pressing it against my pubic bone how I like, despite the so-called finger dents. My fingers fell nowhere near those indentations, and the round shape of the toy didn’t offer a good handhold.

The Adonis is detachable from the control pack via removable plug-in jacks. Normally, I am not a big fan of removable jacks like this, but the Adonis does it uniquely. There are two motors in the toy with independent controls and jacks. One features 3 functions of steady vibration, and the other has 7 functions (low, medium, high, roller coaster, fast pulsation, stair stepper, and super speed). You can choose which jack to use for each motor, so if you prefer pulsation on the inside and vibration on the outside or vice versa, you’re set. This made me feel like I had control over the toy.

There is a single On/Off/Function button for each motor, which is raised and easy to find. This isn’t rocket science and is okay for the motor, which only has 3 functions but becomes a little frustrating with the 7 function motor. You have to page through the rest to the right one or turn it off. There’s also no universal off button; although, I suppose you could just pull the wires from the jacks if you had to. Ideally, there’d be a universal off button and up/down buttons, too. Plus, the control lacks balance as the batteries sit in it kinda weird. They sit in 2 rows or 2 (like this: ==), rather than doubling up thickness so it’s pretty long. The wires between toy and battery pack are a whipping 32″ long and don’t hinder movement. I did find them to be strangely thick but it doesn’t detract from use.

Overall, the vibrations were okay. The pulsation was actually really strong, so strong that pulsation on the clit alone also easily provided G-spot stimulation. On the other hand, the steady vibrations seem to have less life than the pulsations and were a high-frequency type of vibration. I also felt that using both motors at once was perhaps a bit distracting.

There is one major design flaw which is highlighted by the amount of noise this toy makes. The internal bullet typically operates as more than an acceptably low hum, but, strangely, its wire runs through the toy and sits right against the other bullet. This makes the external bullet much louder, almost painfully loud. It’s very distracting. In certain positions, this wire also rattles against the clit bullet even when only the G-spot bullet is on. Another strange construction decision is how the wires exit the toy. The wire from the clitoral bullet; they simply come out of a hole in the toy with no cover or cap. Care is a must when cleaning and I wouldn’t even try this toy in the shower.

In the end, I feel that the Berman Center Adonis G-Spot and Clitoral Stimulator has a strong foundation. It works well for my shape, and with some thought given to the wires and an easier handhold on the outside, I would use it frequently. With the current flaws, I think it should be price more reasonably.

Information, instructions and mini-catalog on inner flap of the Adonis box Berman Center Adonis toy and control/battery pack in organza bag Adonis battery pack and control Coil of cord Wire against the bullet in Adonis Wires exiting the Adonis

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Categories: Reviews, Vibrators

Sue Johanson’s Royal Rabbit Vibrator

July 31st, 2009

Sue Johanson's Royal Rabbit Vibrator

Sue Johanson's Royal Rabbit Vibrator
N/A from

This is an archived review of a discontinued toy.

Not too long ago, I tried a Sue Johanson rabbit vibe and was like “Hmmm, this a decent toy but it doesn’t fit me all that well.” I thought I’d try another toy by Ms Johanson and opted for her Royal Rabbit (I’m trying to get away from this purple kick, really I am!).

In terms of rabbits, this one is different. The Royal Rabbit could be seen as a sort of “back to basics” rabbit. It’s rather much smaller than some (especially compared to giants like the Passion Wave) and measures in at “only” 6″, 4.5″ of which are insertable. With a diameter that’s only slightly above 1″, it could very well be a newbie toy. It also only has one function. No beads or rotation here. The Royal Rabbit only vibrates and only in one place: the head. Because there’s no bullet in the clitoral stimulator, the bunny is much smaller. Lastly, the Royal Rabbit is not controlled by a bulky battery pack/control setup at the bottom of the toy but has a wired remote, the first I’ve tried on a rabbit.

What the Royal Rabbit lacks in size, it more than makes up for in texture and shape. The pthalates free, TPR silicone is ribbed on the shaft, to add an extra bit of sensation to your play. Because of the increased friction, using a bit of water-based lube is a good idea. The enlarged head is also decorated with bumps and whirls, which, I admit, I didn’t feel all that much. However, it’s shaped worked very well for mild G-spot stimulation, which I usually don’t get from rabbits. The head is much firmer than the shaft (which can be bent to about a 90-degree angle) or the bunny’s ears (but his body is about the same firmness as the head). Plus, I never had to deal with any painful cervix bumping. This vibrator was definitely a little easier to maneuver because of its shorter length.

The remote control also aided in maneuverability. Because of my short arms, I have trouble grasping uber-bulky vibes that extend what feels like 3 feet from my vagina. This usually results in the vibe hitting the back wall of my pussy rather than the front/G-spot. This definitely wasn’t an issue here and being able to see the control in my hand took out all the guesswork. The control is very easy to use as well. It has only two buttons: an On/Off button and a button that cycles through the settings. A lot of multispeed/setting vibes do not have a button for an “easy” off, so I also appreciated that. Seeing as this toy is supposedly waterproof, the battery cap does fit snugly and the wise is firmly attached with a little protective cap over it.

Function-wise, this vibrator has a few options. The vibrations start steady and there is a low, medium and high. Next is a setting called rollercoaster, a fast pulsation that increases in speed/frequency then repeats. This is followed by a slower, steady pulsation, then a medium-paced pulsation. The seventh and final mode is a sort of “dot dot dot dash” or three quick pulsations followed by a lingering one, which repeats. For 2AA batteries, the amount of power is what I would consider satisfactory. I did find the steady vibrations to be rather lackluster as that isn’t exactly what does it for me internally. The pulsations were more enjoyable, though.

Unfortunately, since the vibration is focused on the tip of this toy, it wasn’t to be felt near the clit at all. Even if I’m just holding the Royal Rabbit in my hand, I can barely feel vibrations in the bunny’s ears, but once inserted, there’s nothing to be felt at all. I wonder if it would have made more sense to center the vibrations in the middle of the shaft or even in the clit stimulator because I think the rounded head would still be pleasurable on the G-spot. Some people find that multiple functions of some rabbit vibes are distracting so they might enjoy the Royal Rabbit more than I did. Sadly, it offered no clit stimulation at all, and, considering as I am a clitoral orgasm kind of gal, it was disappointing.

Because of the textures I previously mentioned, one might want to take special care when washing the Royal Rabbit. Soap and water or toy cleaner (unfortunately, TPR silicone cannot be sterilized) will work just fine but take your time, perhaps even use a Q-tip in the ridges and whorls. I ran my toy under running water when cleaning and it was fine but I did try to stay away from where the wire protrudes from the vibrator itself as it doesn’t have a nice protective cap n that end, like the battery pack does. I might try this in the shower but would advise against full submersion, just in case.

I was not personally impressed with the Royal Rabbit. It didn’t fit my needs, but someone who can achieve vaginal/G-spot orgasms more easily than I can or who doesn’t mind pairing this with a clitoral vibe might enjoy it better. I do think that this vibrator is about the same quality as the other toys in Sue Johanson’s line; it’s a step up from most Cal Exotic toys, but we’re not talking Fun Factory or anything here. As it is, I don’t have any qualms about using the toy, and it seems decent quality, except for where the wire meets the vibrator. I simply need more than decent to blow my mind.

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Categories: Reviews, Vibrators

Stranger

June 8th, 2009

Stranger

Stranger
N/A from

This is an archived review of a discontinued product.

I was really excited to receive not one but two Fun Factory vibes in one week. The first one blew my mind with its size, power, and flexibility, and the second amazed me with its softness. I mean, when I first withdrew the Stranger from Fun Factory’s signature packaging, I was amazed. I had played with a few silicone toys, all quite stiff and firm, sometimes painfully so. I didn’t even know they made silicone that soft and it was a welcome surprise. Of course, the thinner tip of this vibe is the softest, and it becomes firmer as it becomes thicker, but there’s a fair amount of give the whole way through.

Of course, that’s not the only benefit of using silicone. Fun Factory presents us with another non-porous toy that can be sterilized by wiping down with an alcohol solution. For my purposes, I simply clean with soap and water or toy cleaner, but I like to covet my toys. Who says you have to share?

Like other Fun Factory toys, the Stranger exudes quality. It has a reassuring heft but isn’t bulky in any way. The soft violet silicone has more friction than other materials but is smoother than some silicone I’ve felt. The silicone is molded with ribs on one side, reminiscent of a snake or the tail of some mythical dragon. There is a slight forward lean of the tip of this toy, but I need a more drastic curve to reach my G-spot. There are 2 etched lines on the back of the toy, in roughly a “V” shape but do not meet at a vertex; otherwise, the back of the toy is smooth except for a small Fun Factory logo right above the base.

The base, made of hard plastic in several shades of grey, houses 2 AA batteries which give this vibrator a substantial amount of power but not as much as the Boss. The battery cover pops off by pinching 2 slightly indented points on either side of the toy. Squeezing hard enough causes the cover to pop right off by itself with a click. It took a little practice for me to find the easiest way to do this as I have small hands. The best placement for my fingers is closer to the base than the tip of the toy. The cap goes back on with another click and feels very secure.

My Stranger comes equipped with the old style of Fun Factory controls – a dial decorated with flower-star hybrid. It’s a very unique style of dial, however. Turning either way turns on the lowest setting of vibrations and continued turning increases the vibration. Although not the quietest toy I have, the Stranger isn’t the loudest, either. It’s an appropriate hum. At the highest setting, there is a small “click”. From this setting, turn either way to turn the vibration down or off. There is another slight click when the vibrations are off. It seems to be important to turn the dial slowly, otherwise it skips over most of the vibration settings. I went a little too fast when I was first testing it. I think this makes the toy ideal for those who like to work their way up to the highest setting.

But I’m not really that type of person. I like to go for it right away so I turned it up high, applied some water-based lube and went to work. Well, sort of. I’m just not super sensitive to textures so the ribbing on the Stranger, while pleasing to the eye, made little different to my pussy. The size was also a little lacking and I think this is probably the smaller insertable vibe I have. The Stranger has a circumference of 4 1/2″ and a length of 6 3/4″, 5 3/4″ which is insertable. I like something a little more, at least girth-wise. And, because the Stranger doesn’t have any clitoral nubs or anything, there wasn’t much else it could do. I also found the silicone to be too soft for the pressure I need during clitoral stimulation.

So, I pulled out the Boss and let him finish the job, a little disappointed in the Stranger. While I think it’s a quality toy, far better than some I have used, it’s just not the right size for me. I may break it out from time to time but it won’t get as much use as some of my other Fun Factory toys. This might be for the better, too. It’s a bit more difficult to clean the Stranger because of its crevices and it also collects lint and hair like crazy. God thing it’s splash proof because I think frequent use would require quite heavy washing. It’s also safe for the shower, too, but not for full immersion.

All in all, the Stranger just isn’t my cup of tea. The lack of size overshadowed the high quality of this toy and its decent vibrations. For someone who likes their sex toys a little smaller, however, the Stranger would be perfect.

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Categories: Reviews, Vibrators

Venus Penis

May 16th, 2009

Venus Penis
N/A from

This is an archived review of a discontinued product. You can buy this similar product, but I’m not sure why you’d want to.

Dear California Exotic Novelties,

Size matters. I’m not sure if you missed the memo or if you’re so sure of yourself that you think the rules don’t apply to you but they do. Let me repeat it: size matters. No, it’s not the only thing that matters. So do quality, forethought, creativity and function, all of which you utterly failed to bring to the table when you decided to make yet another pitiful “hands free” vibrator: the Venus Penis. I know that out of the hundreds or thousands of sex toys you will make, some of them are destined to succeed but is that good enough reason for the rest of them to be so horrid? In short, California Exotic, your toy sucks. You suck.

For starters – and let’s kick it off with the big one – I only chose the Venus Penis after having such a disappointing time with my first (and last, until now) strap on vibrator because it has a penis. At least, I thought it did. Your pictures and packaging make it seem mysteriously larger than it actually is. It almost looks like a nice, meaty cock will well defined head. What it actually is, is a finger which has mutated with the head of a cock. It might be a meaty finger, but it’s not much when it comes to insertion. If any of you have vaginas, stick your thumb in it. Wow! See what that does?

Absolutely nothing!

On the topic of size, I have a bone to pick with toy manufacturers who assume that the vagina, clit and anus are all within some 3″ diameter. They’re not. Really. Add an inch or 2 or, hell, even 4 for good measure and then the “erotic clitoral” stimulator and “superior anal” stimulator might reach their target. I mean, come on, can you really call something that doesn’t touch anything superior? I think not.

On a semi-related note, I guess you don’t like fleshy girls. My mons and labia are pretty prominent, which means if I even want clit stimulation, I have to push my lips aside and hold the toy against me. So much for hands-free, huh? Really, all you need to do is make the clit stimulator longer and soft enough so I can adjust it to where I need it.

And while we’re on the subject of inferiority (we are, aren’t we?), let’s talk about the material. Jelly? Really? It smells out of the box and, you’re lucky, because many folks won’t even touch the stuff anymore, but I’m not so picky. And, I’m not sure how you did it, but the jelly is actually rather stiff. The wings kept poking my poor thighs uncomfortably. What gives? (Haha! Nothing, because if the toy had give, it wouldn’t hurt). And the straps? Cheap elastic, which, while soft and shouldn’t hurt, began to chafe after a while.

So where were we? Creativity? Check – I mean, not really. I liked the idea of overall external stimulation combined with internal vibration so I think you tried to do something a little more original, here, but failed. That’s because you lack my next point:  forethought. I probably think more than most people and it doesn’t always do me any good but your lack of thought, period, does me no good. I mean why put the penis in the middle of the butterfly’s tummy when the toy is designed to sit forward, not really under you? This means the already-crappy penis is inserted at an awkward, yes even painful, angle. Maybe that’s why you made it so short? You knew we’d be feeling it but did you count on us saying “Ouch!”?

It also doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that the thigh and waist strap set up just doesn’t work. The entire time I had this thing on (although I must commend you for making this wearable by a large variety of sizes), the toy pulled up and to the front instead of where I wanted it to sit, y’know, against my clit! I think that straps which mimic the shape of a bikini or even like a G-string would make more sense. Plus, the placement made sitting uncomfortable. I’m pretty sure the position the woman is, on the package, is the only feasible position and, even doing that, the anal stimulator kept stabbing at my perineum.

Furthermore, when is someone going to make detachable straps so we can toss them in the washer? Oh, wait, the customer would never know how to put them back on and it’s not our fault. It’s because the setup is ridiculously complicated (remember when I suggested you mimic a well-known set up like panties? That might come in handy, now). I mean, if we could take off the straps without fearing we’d never get them back on correctly, we might use the toy a lot more because cleaning would be so much easier.

Well, maybe. Except for the part where a wire comes out of the toy through a hole in the belly, near the front. I understand it needs to connect to the control pack somehow (standard, CE dial-style controls), but not only does it make cleaning harder than it should be (and you can certainly rule out waterproof capabilities) but it’s kind of weird for the wire to come out from between my lips.

What we’re left with here is function. I would expect strong vibes from a toy powered by 2AA batteries. This wasn’t really the case. However, I did find that I was left with a pleasant tingle and, with a lot of holding the toy and grinding against it, I did get off. Still, I have toys that can do this better, easier, and faster, like my Laya Spot, and if that was all I wanted from this toy, I wouldn’t have purchased it. I got absolutely nothing from the penis on this toy at best, when it wasn’t being painfully mediocre, literally.

You might be wondering now if there was anything I did like. Yes, I liked the colour of this. It’s a neat dark fuchsia. It’s just too bad the shape of the toy isn’t aesthetically appealing; otherwise, I might just consider not throwing it away.

Also, the awkward pose of the “model” on the packaging makes me smile. I mean, who wouldn’t? The fake breast groping and the forced smile are just so strange. I can’t help but laugh. Thanks for that, California Exotic Novelties, and not much else.

Sincerely,

Me

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Categories: Reviews, Vibrators

Decadent Indulgence

April 30th, 2009

Decadent Indulgence
N/A from

This is an archived review of a discontinued toy

Years ago, before we were concerned with environmentally friendly or safe materials in our sex toys, we focused on function alone. The toys which were best loved, like the Decadent Indulgence, came with a high price because they performed so admirably and, even though it may now be considered inferior by some, there were hordes of women who were singing their praise for this rabbit vibrator. Despite the fact that I have tried more than my share of rabbit vibrators, and I usually find a fault, I knew it was my responsibility as a reviewer to try out one of the Decadent Indulgence vibrators. I went with the original because it’s the original for a reason, right?

Back in my early days of sex toy exploration, people raved about the Decadent Indulgence. I never once read a bad review. Women wanted to marry it, despite the fact that it cost over $200. Today, this rabbit vibe costs only a fraction of the price at just under $100. Some wonder if a toy that is made of only TPR is really worth the price, but I have to tell you, it’s not the material that will blow you away! Powered by 4 AA batteries, the original Decadent Indulgence is pretty much a powerhouse of vibration and rotation.

Let me back up a bit. This pink rabbit vibrator by California Exotic, as mentioned, is made of TPR over a rotation shaft and beads, as well as a bullet in the hummingbird-shaped clitoral attachment. The box claims TPR is “hygenically superior” but not only is it spelled wrong, it’s just wrong. Pure silicone or even a silicone composite would be better if hygiene is your concern. Also, considering the stiffness of this material, it wouldn’t make much difference if it were upgraded to silicone. In fact, that is my one major complaint about the Decadent Indulgence. The wings and beak on the hummingbird are cute and vibrate loosely when the clitoral stimulator is on, but they’re rather thin, pointy and sharp. It’s not something that bothers my hands, but I found using the clitoral stimulator to actually be painful unless I was firmly pushing the bullet against my clit so that those appendages were more stationary instead of vibrating freely against me. Because my use of dual stimulators tends to focus on clitoral pleasure, this is a big issue for me. I really wish there were no protrusions at all, just a TPR-covered bullet.

There are two controls for the functions, one for the vibrating hummingbird and one for the shaft/bead rotation. I always prefer separate controls for shaft rotation and beads, so I would like to see that here. The buttons are not the hard-to-press digital kind; they are easy to find and press which I like. In fact, they might be too easy. I hadn’t realized there were 8 levels for each function because the “ultra sensitive control pads” tend to increase 2 or 3 levels at a time. There is also a button in the center that switches modes from basic vibration and rotation to a slower pulsation and back-and-forth rotation and then a much faster mode. The mode applies to both functions so the rotation and beads occur at the same speed as the pulsation, resulting in a more profound effect than if they operated at separate modes. Overall, the combinations are endless.

I found the vibration to be adequate, but the increases were more of speed than size, as is typical with bullets of that size. What I really liked were the pulsation modes. They were incredibly strong, almost too strong at some points, and not at all like the high-frequency pulsation of other vibes, which left me wanting. Even as I lay thinking about how the beak was painful, the pulsation led me orgasm. It was really the first orgasm I had without even trying, and that was vibration-induced alone, so it was something of a milestone, even if it wasn’t the best I’ve ever had. If that doesn’t say something about the value of this toy, I’m not sure what can.

For once, I quite enjoyed the rotation of the shaft. The 3 tracks of 3 beads each move in the same direction and at the same speed as the shaft and were noticeable, but the overall effect felt like there was only one internal function. The rotation was also rather powerful and stood up to clenching but it was hard to tell if both the shaft and beads stood up to my muscles or if it was just the shaft or beads. Either way, I have had few rabbits that stand up at all to clenching, so it was nice.

One of the things I especially like about rabbit vibes is how they hug my pubic bone, and the Decadent Indulgence did a decent job. The TPR, while pliable was stiffer than some jelly I have experienced, and helped with this. I wouldn’t complain if it was a more snug fit. The bullet seemed to be a little further away from the shaft than in some rabbits I have used, resulting in a clit stimulator which is a bit too flexible. I found that in order to place the bullet as high as I like on my vulva, the beak was simply in the way, poking at my mons, and the shaft did reach a little further than I prefer, but this was less of an issue than the beak.

A few other thoughts on this toy. The TPR will attract a little lint and has a slight rubbery smell, but it’s really not offensive. The battery pack is closed with a slide-on cover which doesn’t seem super secure. This toy should not be submerged and you should only use water-based lube. However, TPR should be safe with both water or silicone-based lubricants, so I am not sure why this would be the case.

In the end, I loved the functions of the Decadent Indulgence. The pulsation truly lived up to the name of this toy. However, I could really do without the painful clitoral stimulator. California Exotic does have a lot of toys with similar functions so I will definitely keep my eye out for something that has all the strengths of the Decadent Indulgence without the bite.

7 Comments

Categories: Reviews, Vibrators

Vibratex Pearl Thunder

April 25th, 2009

Pearl Thunder
N/A from

This is an archived review of a discontinued toy.

A while ago, I mentioned that, hey, I must just like ’em big and eagerly took up TabuToys when they offered a larger sized toy for review. After all, why wouldn’t I be curious just how much I can take? The answer is, at least, a diameter of 1.75″ or a circumference just shy of 5.5″. Not bad if I do say so myself. Still, my experience with Vibratex’s Pearl Thunder illustrated that maybe a toy of such size isn’t the best for rotation. Or maybe I should just be done with rotating toys in general.

Although billed as an X-tra Thick toy, I found only part of this rabbit style vibrator to be really large: the head. In fact, only the head is truly 1.75″ in diameter. The rest of the shaft is slightly smaller at about 1.5″ in diameter (and around 5 insertable inches) which seems pretty average to me.

Although, that’s probably the only “average” part of this vibe. I found the whole thing to be really unique, perhaps even weird. With 2 different faces on the toy – 1 which gives new meaning to “head” of a cock toward the top with the engorged tip seeming like hair and one molded into the back of the shaft – I almost want to giggle. The description on TabuToys lists it as the “Thunder from down under” and I conjured up a sort of purple, Aboriginal totem pole.

And don’t worry – there are animals too! The clitoral stimulator, which is some sort of fork-tongued panther-like animal over a small, unique, cylindrical (rather than bullet-shaped) vibrator. And we’re not done yet. On the back of the shaft, around the same height as the clitoral bullet is some sort of rodent (squirrel, otter, beaver?). Whatever it is, it does nothing as I couldn’t feel it at all during insertion.

It almost seems like Vibratex took a bunch of leftovers from the production of other toys to make the Pearl Thunder, and, as you can imagine, there is a lot of texture. There are little etching-like markings over the whole shaft that provide friction if I stroke my hand my over it but aren’t felt as much upon insertion. The clitoral stimulator also has some slightly raised nubs that provide a bit of external stimulation. The added friction, especially with a toy this large, requires a healthy dose of lube, and although I used water-based, silicone-based will work as well. This is also helpful with the stickiness of the “food-grade,” latex-free vinyl (AKA Jelly). The toy will pick up a bit of lint and could possibly react with toys of similar material so storing it in a cool, dark place and away from other toys is the way to go. Furthermore, sharing or anal use is best done with a condom because of the porous nature of the Pearl Thunder.

Looks and texture aside, the functions of this toy are pretty standard. There are two rows of 6 beads each which spin and are controlled by the same sliding button as the rotation. Turning on these functions also shines a red light below the clear beads. As I don’t love rotation like others, I long for toys where shaft and beads have separate controllers. However, I was pleasantly surprised at the strength of the beads. It took the complete strength of my hand to halt their movement and once inserted, they spun despite any clenching of my muscles. I think this is the first time I can say that for any toy so Vibratex hit the jackpot with the beads.

The head of this shaft is on a bendable wire so that it can be bent to hit all the right spots, but if someone is really looking for an extreme angle, they won’t find it with the Pearl Thunder. Only about an inch and a half can bend but because of the super-engorged head, it can only be bent right above the beads to the extent of a 25-degree angle (approximately). I didn’t find this to be an issue because I don’t require my toys to be bent, and I’m not a big fan of rotation: the less, the better.

The issue I had with this toy was that it was actually uncomfortable, even painful, for the shaft to rotate. There is a lot less space for movement when the object inserted is as large as the head on this vibrator, and the front wall of my vagina wasn’t liking it. I was even sore a bit the next day. Unfortunately, I did like the sensation of the beads, which was, as I mentioned, pretty strong, so it was either all or nothing.

I did prefer the clitoral stimulator of the Pearl Thunder over another Vibratex toy I recently reviewed, the Rock Your World vibe. Although not quite as large and powerful as I like bullets to be on rabbit vibes, it did the trick (and with 4 AAs, it better!). The vinyl material is just a little more solid, so the clit stimulator lay snug against me, and the toy hugged my pubic bone how I like. Ultimately, I achieved clitoral orgasm with the shaft turned off, and the bullet turned up to high as I rocked the toy against my pubic bone.

Although I’m usually not a fan of sliding controls like the ones Vibratex uses, I noticed something on the Pearl Thunder that I do not recall on other toys. On maximum, the controls seem to click into place. Although it’s not a secure lock, it does help somewhat to prevent the controls from accidentally moving when you’re in the throes of passion.

One snafu I ran into was the foil-like gold sticker around the controls that describe the functions and direction of strength. When I opened the Pearl Thunder, this sticker was only partially pressed on and seemed to be slightly off-center. The sticker itself looks tacky, but that it wasn’t even completely on was even worse. I pressed it on, and it stayed, but I wound up peeling it off, ultimately. The toy looks infinitely more attractive without it, in my opinion.

I think Vibratex did some things really well with the Pearl Thunder, but there is still room for improvement. The size was nice but I would have preferred a vibrating head as opposed to one that rotates – or separate controls. The beads felt nice and effectively stood the clench test and the body-hugging clitoral stimulator with its slightly raised nubs hit all the right spots (but could have been larger). Although not the safest material, the vinyl was comfortably pliable, and the controls were surprisingly effective once the tacky sticker was removed. Out of all the Vibratex toys I have used, the Pearl Thunder is probably the one I like the most, despite the painful rotation.

6 Comments

Categories: Reviews, Vibrators

Image © MisterUnlucky; used with permission.